Learning Experiences
by Allison McDonnell
Summary: 20 chapter saga. The lives of EA are forever changed when the Terrians have second thoughts about sharing their planet with humans. Who will survive? And who won't?
1. Default Chapter

LEARNING EXPERIENCES  
  
  
  
Author: Allison McDonnell  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
Timeline- Post All About Eve  
  
Teaser: Eden Project is back on track toward New Pacifica. Devon has been cured, at least physically. Unfortunately, there are storm clouds brewing on the horizon. The Terrians are beginning to have second thoughts about sharing their planet with humans. Important decisions are made and the lives of the members of Eden Advance will never ever be the same. Who will survive? And, more importantly, who won't?  
  
Author's note: This was intended to be a character study regarding the ability of several of the Edenites to cope with two types of loss- The loss of people they care about and the loss of control over their situation. It also addresses their survival instincts.  
  
You'll find a spattering of religion throughout the work. I included it because it is pivotal to how one crew member deals with her circumstances. My apologies to anyone who may be offended.  
  
At times, this fiction becomes quite dark and some readers will not like what happens to these characters. Let me put it to you this way, if you're looking for a story filled to the brim with warm fuzzies, skip this one. What can I say? Sometimes, life is messy.  
  
Now, on with the carnage...  
  
____________________________________________________________________  
  
"Every day we head deeper into danger and every day we are changed... whether we like it or not." Alonzo Solace- Promises, Promises  
  
"[The Terrians] fear us... they're confused by us... they fear we're evil." Alonzo Solace- First Contact, Part II  
  
"[The Terrians] will not forgive you... It is not their way." Yale- Better Living Through Morganite, Part II  
  
"Opportunity comes at a cost." Morgan Martin- Better Living Through Morganite, Part I  
  
____________________________________________________________________  
  
It was Day 269 and we were in the midst of our first full season of summer on G889. Devon had recently retaken her place as the leader of Eden Advance and had insisted on driving us at a grueling pace across the continent. She seemed absolutely consumed with making up the three month period of time that was lost due to her illness and subsequent recovery.  
  
The days had been scorchers with the temperature often reaching over one hundred degrees. Exhaustion, both from the heat and the expanded traveling schedule, had begun to take its toll on some of us. Many Edenites, especially John, tried to persuade Devon not to push us so hard, but she wouldn't listen. Despite these problems, we took solace that we were all healthy and alive. We hadn't lost anyone since Eben and the hardships we'd endured those first six months of our journey faded into the back of our minds along with Elizabeth's warnings of the planet rejecting us. Instead, we dared to look ahead and focused our efforts on reaching the goal of New Pacifica.  
  
I sometimes think back to those innocent days in wonderment. I suppose that we'd survived so much together, we began to believe that we were invincible. We couldn't have known that catastrophe was just around the corner. How could we have been so naive?  
  
- Bess Martin Journal Chronicles, Archive File, Entry Date- Year Two (Day 673)  
  
_______________  
  
The blazing morning sun beat down upon the weary Eden Advance crew as they endured another seemingly endless day of travel. The group had been averaging twenty-three clicks a day, an amazing feat considering the difficulties posed by the searing heat and the eclectic terrain. There were only minimal stoppages to allow for the vehicles to recharge. Even Julia had clashed with Devon regarding the shortness of the breaks and the doctor had taken it upon herself to ensure that everyone alternated between walking and riding in the vehicles. Food was also becoming short in supply. The Spirolina, once their much-hated mainstay of energy, was now completely gone and the few crates of fruit that had been gathered a few days back was rotting at a much faster pace than anticipated.  
  
The mind-numbing temperature and uncertainty of the food situation were more than enough to cause tempers to flare. Several arguments had erupted about everything from the rationing of their water to whose turn it was to ride in the 'Rail. Even Bess and Morgan were barely speaking much of the time.  
  
However, no one was more agitated than Devon Adair. But she wasn't tired of the traveling or the inclement weather. She'd had more than enough of her groups limitless whining and complaining. If they'd only put half of their effort into putting one foot in front of the other as they did into their griping, we'd already be at New Pacifica by now, she coldly thought.  
  
Suddenly, she was shaken out of her reverie by the Transrover grinding to a halt ahead of her.  
  
She angrily addressed the person walking closest to her. "What's going on? Why are we stopping?"  
  
Cameron shrugged his shoulders and hoped that he wouldn't be the latest recipient of one of Adair's infamous tirades. His prayers for clemency were answered as she briskly moved passed him in search of a more worthy adversary.  
  
"DANZIGER!"  
  
Either John ignored her angry bellowing or he was too engrossed in his conversation with Julia and Alonzo at the head of the caravan to acknowledge her. Probably a little bit of both, although no one blamed him for not wanting to butt heads with their turbulent leader... especially lately.  
  
"Danziger!" Devon yelled as she furiously marched up to the trio. "Didn't you hear me call your name?"  
  
The mechanic didn't even bother to turn around and stated matter-of- factly, "Most of the planet heard you yellin' for me, Adair. I'll be right with you."  
  
Not being a patient person, particularly these past weeks, Devon stepped directly in between Danziger and Alonzo.  
  
"Why are we stopping?" she spat, poking her finger into John's chest. "Answer me!"  
  
Quickly losing his own composure, he pointed and responded through clenched teeth, "We're stopping because of that."  
  
Devon squinted to see over a dozen Terrians lining the hills several hundred yards ahead of them, their lightning staffs at the ready.  
  
"Well?" Clearly not impressed, she turned to Alonzo and questioned impatiently, "What do they want?"  
  
Before he could answer, Julia crisply replied, "I don't know, Devon. Give us a few minutes for Alonzo to contact them on the Dreamplane and we'll find out."  
  
Adair had no problem showing her displeasure and hissed back, "Just be quick about it. We're behind schedule as it is."  
  
She turned her back to them and commanded to the others, "All right, everyone. We're taking a quick break, but don't get too comfortable. I expect us to make at least another eighteen clicks today."  
  
She then stormed off toward the 'Rover to join Yale and Uly, the only two members of Eden Advance who she had not completely shut out of her life.  
  
Although there was a chorus of moans at the statement of her further expectations from them, the group didn't really pay much attention to the Terrians or the possible reason for their visit. They were just glad to get a few minutes rest.  
  
"Let me know what you find out, okay?" John requested in a calm, but authoritative tone to the pilot.  
  
Both Alonzo and Julia nodded and found a shaded spot under a nearby tree that was far enough away from the others to ensure their privacy. After the doctor checked his vital signs, Alonzo closed his eyes and began his communication with the Terrians.  
  
Seeing that Solace was in good hands, Danziger went to go check on his daughter who had been riding in the cab of the Transrover with Mazatl. However, just as he reached the front tire of the vehicle, a hand grabbed his forearm and attempted to spin him around.  
  
"Can't you do something about her?" Morgan irately challenged.  
  
Danziger slowly rotated to stare down the bureaucrat. "You'd better back off or your gonna lose that hand," he warned in a low growl.  
  
Morgan hastily let go and the mechanic began to walk away, but the liaison stepped in front of him to block his exit. "Devon expects too much of us. We can't keep up this pace much longer. And the heat is-"  
  
John threw up his hands in exasperation. "Martin, what do you want me to do? I know that everyone is tired. I know that it's hot as hell and there's no sign of the weather letting up. I know that the vehicles are barely holding together. I've tried talking to her about this, but she doesn't want to hear it. All she cares about is getting to her precious New Pacifica."  
  
Danziger wiped the sweat from his brow and ran his now-soaked fingers through his hair. In a softer tone, he uttered, "At this point, you probably have more influence on Adair than I do. Maybe you should try talking some sense to her."  
  
A look of genuine surprise overtook the bureaucrat's face at Danziger's statement. He opened his mouth to respond although he wasn't quite sure what he was going to say. However, a kind voice interrupted him.  
  
"Morgan, Honey, why don't you come sit down with us over here?"  
  
As Martin turned to address his wife, John took the opportunity to take his leave and reinitiate the quest to find his daughter. Morgan wandered over to Bess who was congregated with Magus, Baines and Denner in the shade of a large rock.  
  
As she handed him a very ripe piece of fruit similar to a nectarine, the Earth-res stated, "You really should leave him alone. He's got a lot on his mind right now."  
  
"Who, 'The Missing Link'?" Morgan remarked mockingly as Bess frowned at his newest description for the mechanic. "We all have a lot on our minds right now."  
  
"Not like Danziger," Magus noted, shaking her head.  
  
Denner looked at her quizzically. "What do you mean? Is there something wrong with him?" she meekly asked.  
  
Baines stammered with a mouthful of food, "What? You haven't heard?"  
  
Denner shrugged her shoulders in confusion as Magus relayed, "Danziger told Devon how he felt about her and it didn't go as well as he'd hoped."  
  
"You can say that, again," Baines commented.  
  
"You're kidding. What happened?"  
  
"About two weeks ago, Walman was doing a late-night perimeter check when he heard voices coming from behind the Transrover. He went to investigate and overheard a particularly nasty one-sided conversation between Devon and Danziger." Magus looked to ensure that neither of them were around before continuing. "Apparently Walman missed Danz's confession entirely, but he sure got an earful of Devon's response."  
  
When Magus stopped to take a breath, Bess picked up where she'd left off. "Devon told him that there would never be anything between them. That John meant nothing to her beyond what he could do to keep the vehicles and the generators running. She also told him to stay away from her." She shook her head in disgust. "I think it was downright mean."  
  
Denner was shocked. "My God, what did Danziger do?"  
  
"Nothing," Baines answered. "Absolutely nothing. He just stood there and took it. When Devon was finally done mentally beating him to a bloody pulp, she just strolled away like it was no big deal. A few minutes later, Danz went back to his tent."  
  
"And he's been avoiding her ever since," Magus added.  
  
"Haven't we all?" Baines blurted out. "That woman has been in a bad mood ever since she was released from cold-sleep. It's like her personality is still frozen."  
  
"Not her whole personality- just her heart," Bess ventured as she took a bite of fruit.  
  
"I hate to admit this, but I liked it much better when Danziger was leading us," Denner disclosed as the others, with the exception of Morgan, nodded in agreement.  
  
"Yeah, he may have been a bit standoffish, but John was always fair. He pushed us, but he always made sure that we were fed and well-rested. He also kept us informed on what was going on. At least we knew were we stood with him."  
  
"We know where we stand with Devon, too," Magus snorted. "She acts like she's on a cattle drive herding all us dumb animals to New Pacifica. And when we get there, we have the extreme privilege of building her a city."  
  
"I'm getting really tired of her crappy attitude," Baines sneered. "She'd better curve that temper of hers or she'll be running a colony of three- her, her kid and his tutor."  
  
John had just sat down in the shade of the 'Rail hoping to spend a few quality moments with True when he heard angry shouts coming from the direction where Alonzo was situated.  
  
Here we go again, Danziger thought as he shook his head and stood up. This was becoming a daily, sometimes almost hourly, occurrence. When the hell did I become the peacekeeper of this group? he wondered.  
  
He exchanged an all-knowing look with his daughter before leaving to join the loud conversation already in heated progress. Devon was apparently being her usual undiplomatic self while Alonzo was attempting to reason with her. Julia looked as though she was about to punch the leader in the face.  
  
"I will not change our route," Devon snapped as she folded her arms in front of her.  
  
Solace answered, "We don't really have a choice, Devon. This tribe of Terrians doesn't want us on their land."  
  
Devon noticed John's presence beside her and made a big show of taking two large steps away from him.  
  
"Well, we won't be on it for very long," she pressed. "Tell them that we're just passing through and we won't bother them. They'll hardly know we're there."  
  
"They won't budge about this. Believe me, I tried. Apparently, they aren't very fond of humans. And there's more." Alonzo divulged in an apprehensive voice, "They want us to travel to a specific place about fifteen clicks north of here."  
  
"Did they say why?" Danziger asked.  
  
"They wouldn't tell me. They just said to go there and wait for further instructions."  
  
Adair was less than thrilled. "Wait? Wait for what?"  
  
"Could it be another Terrian ceremony like Moon Cross? Something they may need Uly to participate in?" Julia posed.  
  
Devon's face showed momentary panic, but she quickly regained her composure and replaced her mask. However, John noticed her frightened expression and sought to calm her fears.  
  
"Maybe they know that we're running low on food and water and they're directing us to an area where we can replenish our supplies."  
  
Alonzo nodded. "Could be. They did mention that the place was located near a river."  
  
Julia added, "Perhaps that's the edge of their territory and we'll be able to resume our course from there."  
  
Devon took a deep breath as she mulled over the proposed reasons for straying from their path. Many of the ideas made perfect sense but, in the long run, the points were moot. Nothing mattered to her except keeping her son safe and getting to New Pacifica as quickly as possible.  
  
"No," she decided. "We are not going to veer off our planned route. We don't have time to go on wild-goose chases at the whim of the Terrians."  
  
Julia shook her head angrily. "It's their planet, Devon. And they were pretty clear that they didn't want us setting foot on their soil. You're saying that we should ignore their wishes and go barging through their territory?"  
  
"That's exactly what I'm saying," Devon replied a bit too casually. "Tell them we're sorry, but we have a schedule to keep."  
  
"I disagree," John interjected. "Last winter, 'Lonz, Magus and Baines were shot at by a tribe that didn't want us coming near their land. If these Diggers feel the same way, we could be placing ourselves in danger. We should head north and find out what they want."  
  
"John's right," Julia said.  
  
Devon turned to furiously address the doctor, but Danziger interrupted her, hoping to avoid a further confrontation. "If you want to bring it to a group vote, I can call the others over and fill them in on what's going on."  
  
There were a few moments of tense silence. John knew that once the colonists were informed of their options, they would vote against Devon. And more importantly, Devon knew it, too.  
  
"Fine, we'll go," she relented. She turned to John for the first time and icily stared him down. "And when the colony ship lands and there's no hospital or housing for them because we were too busy traipsing miles off- course across the countryside, I'll know who to blame."  
  
The mechanic's face was set in stone and he didn't even blink as he replied, "Makes no difference to me who you blame, Adair."  
  
Devon barely waited for his response and stomped away without saying another word.  
  
Alonzo scoffed in irritation, "The Terrians are the ones that healed her. You'd think she'd be grateful to them. Instead, she acts as if they're an inconvenience."  
  
"At the moment, they are an inconvenience to her. They're a threat to her making it to the west coast in time for the Jamestown's arrival," Danziger reasoned. "Besides, you and I both know that the Terrians may have been the ones who caused her illness in the first place."  
  
"We don't know that," the pilot challenged.  
  
"Exactly. All we're sure of is that one moment Devon was dying and the next she's fine. It took almost two months of you and Uly negotiating with the Terrians to convince them to finally help her. And we still don't have the slightest clue what happened to make her sick or what the Diggers did to make her better. Devon feels like she's lost control of her life and it scares the hell out of her."  
  
"That doesn't excuse her conduct," Julia pointed out.  
  
"Look, I'm not saying you should excuse it. I'm just saying that it's the reason she's been so difficult to deal with since she's recovered." He calmly related over his shoulder as he walked away to rejoin his daughter, "Just give her time. She'll get past this."  
  
Alonzo and Julia stared after him in disbelief.  
  
"I cannot believe that he's actually defending Devon after all of the grief she's caused him the last few weeks," the doctor remarked in amazement.  
  
They watched as Danziger happily scooped up True and swung her around to a sitting position on his shoulders. Her giggles filled the air as they joined Cameron and Mazatl by the ATV for a quick bite to eat.  
  
Alonzo shrugged his shoulders. "I guess John's just happy to have Devon back alive."  
  
__________  
  
They traveled most of the afternoon crossing over and between several small mountain ranges. Danziger had to take over driving the Transrover and was just barely able to manage the vehicle through the extremely rocky terrain. Luckily, the surroundings eventually became grassier and he was able to relinquish driving duties to Baines who looked as though he needed a break from walking. Soon their path was lined with tall trees which shaded the colonists from the blistering sun. As the Edenites neared their destination, they noticed vegetation bearing several types of fruits and nuts. Maybe the Terrians really are leading us to supplies, Devon reflected.  
  
The caravan continued plodding forward as Bess and True each grabbed a crate and began to hurriedly fill them with food. John became aware that both of them were lagging behind the rest of the group and went back to get them.  
  
"Hey, Dad. Can I eat some of these now?" True excitedly asked as she showed her father the nearly half-filled container of nuts.  
  
He chuckled and planted a kiss on top of her head. "Tell you what, Sport. Go see Julia and make sure that they're safe. Once you get her seal of approval, you can have all you want."  
  
With giddy delight, True yanked the crate to her chest and starting running as fast as her legs would carry her toward the physician.  
  
"Just make sure you share with the others," he added as his daughter disappeared into the small crowd ahead.  
  
Danziger scanned the woods for Bess, but didn't see her in his line of sight. He called out her name several times, but got no response. As he searched, his eyes focused in on a large pile of an apple-like fruit that was loosely scattered around the base of a tree about twenty yards away. John wandered over to investigate when he suddenly heard a loud rustling noise up above him. Before he could react, he was hit in the head by several objects as they rained down from above.  
  
"Hey!" he shouted as another apple smacked him squarely in the forehead.  
  
"Oh dear, I'm so sorry, John!" Bess apologized as she stood on a large leafy branch about twelve feet above him. "Are you okay?"  
  
"I'm fine. Just might be seeing double for awhile, that's all," he said in a serious tone although she knew he was joking. "What the hell are you doing up there?"  
  
"I'm jumping on the limbs to make the fruit fall. It's much faster than picking them one by one."  
  
Danziger looked up ahead and noticed that the convoy had reached the other side of the hill and was now completely out of their view. "Well, hurry up and get down here before we're left behind."  
  
Bess swung downward and dangled from the large branch as John grabbed her securely by the waist and eased her to the ground safely. As she thanked him, his gear began to beep incessantly. Knowing full well who it was, he grudgingly placed the equipment on his head to answer the call. Bess could clearly hear the screaming on the other end.  
  
"Danziger, where the hell are you? Get back up here now!"  
  
Between Devon's earlier denunciations and the surprise fruit attack, John wasn't in the mood to engage in another pointless battle. "Relax, Adair. Take a breath and count to ten. Bess and I are just getting some fruit for dinner tonight, okay?"  
  
"Bess is with you? Well, tell her to hurry up, too. We're not stopping for either of you!"  
  
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," he muttered as he hung up on her and shoved the apparatus down around his neck. He arched his eyebrow as he met Bess' sympathetic gaze. "And people wonder why I never wear my gear."  
  
Bess chortled in amusement as she and Danziger began tossing the apples into the crate that she had placed behind the tree. "No offense intended, John, but how do you put up with Devon when she acts like that?"  
  
"Well, actually-" he started before the conversation was abruptly suspended by Bess' own gear sounding off.  
  
"Gee, wonder who that could be?" he sarcastically asked as she answered the call.  
  
Although Danziger couldn't hear the bureaucrat's actual words, he could certainly make out the whining tone of voice that resonated through Bess' earpiece as she tried to pacify her husband. He sat back against the tree with his hands folded behind his head and proceeded to enjoy the show.  
  
"Yes, Morgan."  
  
"Mmm-mmm."  
  
"I know, honey, but-"  
  
"Morgan, we're just getting fruit for-"  
  
"Well, I would have told you I was leaving if you weren't so immersed in your VR."  
  
"Mmm-mmm."  
  
"Mmm-mmm."  
  
"Calm down, Sweetie. It's just-"  
  
"Mmm-mmm."  
  
"I'm sure you're fine Morgan. If the symptoms don't disappear by this evening, we'll have Julia check you out."  
  
"Mmm-mmm."  
  
"Morgan Honey-"  
  
"Morgan-"  
  
"Okay, Morgan. Just sit tight and I'll be right there."  
  
As Bess removed her gear and replaced it into the holder on her belt, Danziger was surprised to see that she looked a bit embarrassed.  
  
"You know what you said to me just before we were rudely interrupted? I guess I could pose that same question to you. How do you put up with Morgan when he acts like that?" John smirked and dryly added, "Of course, no offense intended."  
  
"Yeah, well, Morgan certainly has his moments, but he has a lot of redeeming qualities, too. But you're right. Sometimes," she sighed, "sometimes he is a little hard to take and I'll admit that my patience with him has been wearing pretty thin lately."  
  
Despite their recent difficulties, Bess still felt it necessary to defend her husband as she had so many times before. "But he's not used to this kind of life. You know, the living outdoors in tents and all of the traveling. I'm sure that things will change for the better when we get to New Pacifica. And I know that deep down Morgan needs me and he loves me."  
  
John let out a slow breath and shrugged his shoulders. "I understand," he stated sincerely.  
  
For the first time, Bess realized that John actually did understand because he himself was in a similar situation regarding Devon.  
  
She had watched Danziger with great interest these past few months. There was no doubt in anyone's mind that he had fallen hopelessly in love with Devon. Bess remembered how distraught he'd been that first night after their leader was placed in the cold-sleep capsule. John had walked out of camp and planted himself on the edge of a nearby cliff. He'd just stared at the clear, star-filled sky all night long, refusing to speak to anyone. The next day, he was eerily calm and took over leadership duties as if nothing was amiss. Bess knew that it must have ripped him apart to leave Bennett's ship and continue their voyage to New Pacifica, but he showed nothing.  
  
Instead, Danziger threw himself into making sure that everyone was well taken care of, especially the children. Bess surmised that John didn't think that the group would survive losing another member and took steps to ensure that this didn't occur. Although New Pacifica was a priority, he had no problem venturing off-course a few clicks if it meant restocking their food and water supply. However, he stayed strangely unemotional and kept to himself most of the time. Even True had mentioned that she felt excluded from his life. John barely ate or slept and he hardly spoke unless it was regarding camp business. Sensing that he could use a friend to talk to, Bess had attempted to break through to him, but he'd kept her at a distance. Moreover, unless he was checking with Julia about a cure or conferring with Alonzo and Uly about a possible Terrian healing, John never ever mentioned Devon by name.  
  
When the Terrians finally agreed to save her life and the Edenites returned to that cursed canyon, John actually refused to enter the ship. Instead, he waited alone in his tent and had Julia contact him on gear when everything was over. A few of the crew thought that he was being heartless by not wanting to be there when Devon awoke, but Bess knew better. She understood that John was frightened by the feelings that seeing her again would evoke from him. Alonzo and Bess had to physically drag him to the med-tent to visit her that following morning. Of course, no one knew at the time how much the two months of imprisonment in the cryo-crypt had changed Devon. They'd assumed that everything would go back to the way it was before they'd ever heard the name Franklin Bennett or Eve. They were wrong.  
  
As Devon regained her strength, she became more and more difficult to deal with. She was angry at the Terrians for their clandestine role in her illness. She resented Julia for not being able to find a cure. She somehow found fault with almost every decision that Danziger had made in her absence. She blamed everyone for her predicament except for Yale and Uly, her former inner circle from the Stations. Devon became positively consumed with recommencing the trek to New Pacifica as quickly as possible. And she didn't care who she stepped on or over to get there.  
  
In contrast, the old John Danziger started to slowly reemerge. However, there were a few very noteworthy changes. As angered as John was at Devon's tactless demeanor and tantrums, he stayed silent unless he felt that she was placing the colonists at risk. Remarkably, Danziger became the arbitrator of the group and continued to gain the respect and loyalty of the Edenites in the process. He also seemed much happier and earnestly tried to make up for all the time lost with his prized True when he had taken over the role as leader.  
  
Bess was sure that John must have been devastated after Devon coldly rejected his confession of love for her. Still, he seemed hopeful that Devon would eventually come around and realize that she loved him, too. Plus, he was just plain grateful that Devon was physically healed, even if the emotional scars remained. He seemed content to wait it out and see what happens.  
  
John noticed that Bess had stopped loading the crate and was staring at him strangely.  
  
"Did I say something wrong?" he asked in concern.  
  
She smiled angelically. "Nope. Just thinking about how much some of us have changed these last few months."  
  
"Don't remind me," John groaned as he rolled his eyes.  
  
He went to grab the now-full box of fruit, but Bess darted in front of him and attempted to pick up the crate herself.  
  
"What are you doing, Martin?"  
  
"It was my idea to go foraging. It's my responsibility to carry it," Bess insisted.  
  
Danziger shook his head. "Don't be stupid. That box must weigh fifty pounds."  
  
"I can carry fifty pounds."  
  
"I'm sure you can, but I'm not walking back empty-handed while you drag that oversized crate behind you," he challenged. "Hand it over."  
  
Bess stood her ground with a smile. "No."  
  
John leaned in toward her with his hands on his hips. "We can do this the easy way or do it the hard way, Bess. Just remember, I'm much bigger than you."  
  
She strained as she lifted the crate, spilling part of the bounty in the process. "Yeah, but I have youth on my side!" she teased as she reset the container on the ground with a thud.  
  
Danziger's jaw dropped wide open. "I cannot believe those words just came out of your mouth!" He chuckled as he bent down to pick up the dropped fruit. "Besides, I'm not that much older than you."  
  
He stopped for a moment and hesitantly inquired, "Wait a minute. How old are you?"  
  
"Twenty-four."  
  
John's brows furrowed and he shook his head. "You're right. I am a lot older. Carry the damn apples."  
  
Bess grinned devilishly. "So, Danziger, what is your age, anyway?" She winked and whispered, "Come on, you can tell me. It'll be our secret."  
  
"Never you mind," he grumbled good-naturedly as they each picked up a corner of the crate. "Let's just say that my age is somewhere between yours and Solace's."  
  
Bess and John continued to laugh and converse as they made their way up the hill jointly carrying that night's meal. Neither of them noticed that they were being observed by two figures just beyond the copse of trees.  
  
__________ 


	2. 2/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 2  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
Author's note: Because this format does not allow me to use italics, the Terrian's words will be enclosed by .  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
By late afternoon, Eden Advance reached their goal and even Devon had to admit that it was a breathtaking sight. The valley was chock-full of vegetation with the surrounding hills displaying numerous shades of vibrant green. As they descended the ridge, the colonists could smell the faint scent of tuberoses along with several other colorful varieties of flowers and herbs.  
  
"It's incredible here," Magus exclaimed as she picked a yellow dandelion-like blossom and tucked it behind her ear.  
  
Alonzo nodded and remarked, "This has got to be the place."  
  
They entered the flat grassy clearing several hundred yards wide and began to unload their tents and personal items. However, several of them stopped when they noticed Danziger walking away from them, deep in concentration.  
  
"What is it, Dad?"  
  
He turned and brought his index-finger to his lips. "Ssshhh, listen. Do you hear it?" The camp immediately became silent. "Sounds like rushing water."  
  
"Must be the river that the Terrians were talking about."  
  
A look of euphoria spread across the faces of just about every member of the crew. Most dropped what they were doing and tore off into the forest toward the direction of the sound. When they reached the banks, they were greeted with an almost ideal scene. There was a large circular alcove of water that stretched almost seventy-five yards across. It would have been technically considered a lake if it's contents didn't spill into the river just beyond. Although the river itself was foreboding with rough, choppy waters, the current dissipated as it edged toward the shore.  
  
After Julia tested the water and gave the all-clear sign, many Edenites gleefully jumped in fully clothed to cool down. John reached the riverside just in time to see Alonzo playfully yank a very surprised Julia into the water. Walman, Magus and Baines were in the midst of a boisterous splashing fight while True was busy dunking Uly.  
  
"Careful, True-girl. Don't stray too far away from the bank." He sprinkled a bit of water on his face and behind his neck and laughed, "And stop trying to drown Uly."  
  
She groaned before reluctantly agreeing. Of course, as soon as her father's attention was drawn away, Uly again disappeared underwater.  
  
"I can't wait to finally have some clean clothes to wear," Denner said as she submerged herself.  
  
Cameron waded over next to her and complacently added, "I could stay in here all night."  
  
Danziger waited at the water's edge for a few more minutes and studied the new surroundings. As beautiful as the setting was, something didn't seem right.  
  
Clapping his hands to get their attention, he authoritatively called out, "Okay, guys, enough fun for now. We need to get our campsite up. Who's on meal-duty tonight?"  
  
Cameron and Denner reluctantly raised their hands.  
  
"Well, let's snap to it." John started filling the empty pails which he had brought with him. "Solace and Walman, I could use your help over here."  
  
The two slowly trudged toward him, their shoes squeaking due to the fact that neither had bothered to remove them before taking a dip. He handed them a full pail. "Grab a bucket."  
  
Both men could see that the mechanic was definitely anxious about something. "What's wrong?"  
  
"Probably nothing," John replied in a low voice. "I just get the feeling like we're being watched."  
  
Alonzo looked around him nervously. "Yeah. Now that you mention it, I feel it, too."  
  
Danziger stood up, hoisting two full pails of water. "Well, no need to alert the entire camp. Just keep your eyes peeled."  
  
"Shouldn't we tell Devon?" Walman asked as John began to make his way through the woods toward camp.  
  
Yeah, John thought sarcastically, that would make my day complete. He shook his head and snorted, "Be my guest."  
  
  
  
Everyone had abandoned the campsite to search for the river with the exception of Devon, Yale, Bess and Morgan. While Yale and Morgan gathered firewood, Bess decided that it was high-time to have a heart-to-heart talk with their leader. She strolled up to Devon who was in the midst of unpacking various navigation equipment from the 'Rover.  
  
"Did you need something, Bess?" she asked with her back to the Earth- res.  
  
"Well, Danziger and I were talking this afternoon and it got me thinking about all that we've been through since we crashed here." She assisted Devon in lifting a folding table from the cab of the vehicle. "You know, how much we've been changed by our experiences."  
  
Devon stopped and gave her a steely gaze. The mention of the mechanic's name put her immediately on edge. "Is there a point to this?" she said curtly.  
  
"I guess I'm just trying to understand why you're so angry all the time. Why you're pushing all of us away." Bess gave Devon her most reassuring look and revealed her true agenda. "I know that you almost died and it must have been a very frightening experience, but we're here for you. And more importantly, John is here for you."  
  
Although she was a bit unnerved by Devon's intense stare, she continued. "John loves you. And I think that you would love him, too, if you just allowed yourself to admit your feelings."  
  
There was a very pregnant pause. Bess swore that she could actually see steam coming out of Devon's ears. "Are you finished?"  
  
Bess nodded, now thinking that this may not have been such a good idea after all.  
  
"First of all, what you call 'anger', I call voicing my opinion and sticking to my guns." Devon's face became flushed. "You think I'm coming across as a shrew? Too bad. I'm not here to be your best friend nor am I trying to win a popularity contest. And I'm not pushing anyone away. I'm simply weeding out any unnecessary interaction that keeps me from focusing on the tasks at hand. I'm in charge of getting us to New Pacifica in time for the colony ship and I will not allow anyone or anything to get in the way."  
  
She stepped toward Bess, forcing her to retreat backwards against the 'Rover. "And as for Danziger, I couldn't care less how he feels about me. While I'll admit that I may have had an attraction to him in the past, those feelings are certainly long gone now. Those months in cold-sleep opened my eyes wide open. It made me realize that I don't want or need a man in my life. With the exception of my son, I don't need anyone." Her nose was only inches from Bess as she hissed, "Have I made myself clear?"  
  
Bess was flabbergasted by Devon's outburst. Finally finding her voice, Bess uttered, "Yes, you've made yourself clear and I've never felt more sorry for you than I do right now."  
  
"I don't want your pity," Devon seethed. A sardonic smile crossed her lips as she challenged, "In fact, maybe you should stop wasting your time worrying about my love life and start concentrating on trying to save your own failing marriage."  
  
Devon marched away, feeling triumphant and leaving Bess in wide-eyed shock. She felt as though she had been slapped across the face. This was no longer the woman that Bess had poured her heart out to when she and Morgan had had their initial marital problems. With a heavy heart, Bess realized that things had indeed changed, the least of which was the knowledge that she now had one less person whom she could call friend.  
  
__________  
  
"How could she say such terrible things?" Bess huffed as she heatedly fastened the poles of their tent together.  
  
Morgan was struggling as he tried to secure the pegs into the ground. "Bess, how many times have I told you not to talk to her?"  
  
She acted as though she hadn't heard him. "I mean, she was certainly bossy when we first landed here, but she got better." Bess shook her head. "Devon used to laugh and smile. She listened to what we had to say. How could one person change so much?"  
  
Morgan straightened up and looked at her oddly. "Honey, don't you remember all of the times I'd come home from work and tell you about the things Devon had done? All of the people she'd fire if her demands weren't met to the letter. She tried to dismiss me at least a half a dozen times, but couldn't since I was appointed by the government." He rolled his eyes at the memories. "The battles she'd wage over being granted level clearances. She had the subtlety of a steamroller when it came to getting what she wanted. Nothing was ever good enough for her. She was positively tyrannical."  
  
Morgan laid his hands on his wife's shoulders reassuringly. "What I'm trying to tell you is that she's changed, but not the way you think. THIS is the real Devon, the one that I dealt with on a daily basis on the Stations. Maybe her personality was on sabbatical those first six months we were here, but she's back to the way she used to be. And if she wants to run the planet like its her own personal boardroom, let her. Just try to stay out of the way."  
  
Feeling that he'd made his point, Morgan let his hands slip to his sides. He grabbed their largest suitcase and carried it into their quarters.  
  
Bess heavily sank down on an empty box. "But Danziger loves her," she muttered sadly.  
  
Morgan answered her through the canvas. "Yeah, well, Danziger loves someone that doesn't exist anymore. Besides, it would've never worked out for them anyway."  
  
"How can you possibly say that? They're perfect for each other. They're single parents. They're stubborn and headstrong-"  
  
"-and she's an Adair and he's a Drone," he interjected.  
  
Because they were separated by the tent wall, Morgan didn't see the effect his use of the vulgar term had on Bess. He casually continued, "At one time- something that I'll never understand if I live to be a hundred- Devon may have had a certain fascination with Danziger. I don't know, maybe she was curious to see how the other side lived. But let's face facts here. Devon Adair would never have settled for someone raised in the Quad. As soon as the colony ship arrived with all of her hoity-toity friends, she would have put him out with the rest of the trash."  
  
There was a moment of silence before Bess replied coolly, "That wouldn't have happened."  
  
Morgan still had no idea that he'd said anything upsetting. He exited the tent and saw an indescribable look on his wife's face.  
  
Mistakenly thinking that she needed more convincing and always looking for an opportunity to get in a dig at the mechanic's expense, he callously remarked, "Think about it for a minute. Devon was educated in the best schools. She even had a Yale unit as a tutor. Danziger probably doesn't have a high school degree. She's used to dinner parties and seven-course meals. I bet that Neanderthal has never even owned a tie. They're socially incompatible. I mean, what do they really have in common? What are they supposed to talk about? Devon is going to be the chief administrator of an entire colony. Did you really think that she would allow herself to be publicly courted by some low-class mechanic in secondhand clothing and dirt under his nails? She would be the laughing stock of the community!"  
  
Morgan crouched down in front of a seated Bess and grabbed her now- pale hands. "It's how the world works, Honey. When people come from two totally diverse backgrounds like those two do, the relationship is doomed from the start."  
  
Bess could only sit there with her mouth agape. She had always believed that when the colony ship arrived, everyone would be on equal ground, whether they were an Earther, an Immigrant Worker or born with a silver spoon in their mouth. Bess hadn't considered the possibility that the people settling New Pacifica might be just as prejudiced as those back on the Stations.  
  
She remembered how awful it felt to be laughed at, sometimes behind her back and sometimes right to her face. They would make fun of her accent and her tattered clothing. Her doe-eyed amazement and confusion at the many things found on the Stations that she'd never seen before was a source of constant embarrassment. Listening now to Morgan's rude description of the barriers between the Haves and Have-nots astounded and revolted her. And what made the declaration even worse was that her husband seemed to have no problem with the narrow-minded ignorance he was espousing. It hit way too close to home.  
  
She gathered her strength and abruptly stood up, forcing Morgan to fall backward onto the grass.  
  
"Two totally diverse backgrounds, huh? Like maybe a married couple where one grew up on the Stations and the other was raised on Earth? That same couple where one is a lawyer and the other had no formal education at all?"  
  
The bureaucrat cocked his head back in surprise. "Bess, I, um, I-"  
  
"I seem to remember that when we first met, you were wearing a neatly pressed suit and I was practically dressed in rags." The Earth-res dug her knuckles into her hips as she stood over him. "And I had PLENTY of dirt under my nails."  
  
"Bess, you know that I wasn't talking about us!"  
  
She challenged, "Weren't you, Morgan? Look how different we are from each other. Are you saying that we're doomed?"  
  
Morgan rose to his feet and started dusting himself off. He gave her his best 'I have no clue what you're talking about' look and animatedly replied, "Of course not, Bess. We're not the same as Devon and Danziger. For one thing, I'm not from the upper crust of society like she was."  
  
"No, you weren't. But I'm from a place considered ten times worse than the Quadrant. I figure that pretty much makes it the same situation."  
  
"Come on, Honey. You're just being-" He stopped when Bess grabbed her suitcase and began walking in the opposite direction. "Where do you think you're going?"  
  
Bess turned to meet his startled gaze. "I don't want to be around you right now, Morgan. I'm going to talk to Magus and see if I can stay in her tent tonight."  
  
"What? What are you saying to me?" he asked in disbelief as he caught up to her.  
  
"I'm saying that I need a break from you right now. I have a lot of thinking to do."  
  
"But, Bess-" Morgan called after her, but she was already engaged in conversation with Magus about the new sleeping arrangements.  
  
__________  
  
Later that evening, Alonzo contacted the Terrians to find out exactly why they had been summoned to the area. When he reached the Dreamplane, the pilot was met by a single Terrian bearing a simple message.  
  
Stay within the valley. You must not attempt to leave. All will be revealed very soon.  
  
Knowing that the Terrians had quite a different view of the concept of time than humans, Alonzo wasn't sure what the creatures considered to be 'very soon'. He attempted to clarify the statement, but was met with the same answer.  
  
Stay within the valley. You must not attempt to leave. All will be revealed very soon.  
  
Realizing that the creature would only tout the party line and nothing more, Alonzo finally gave up after several minutes and allowed himself to fall back into a normal sleep.  
  
__________  
  
The following morning, Solace relayed the Terrian's command to the others. In addition, Uly casually remarked that there was a large group of the creatures congregated in the rugged mountain range to the northwest of the valley. When asked how he knew this, Uly just shrugged his shoulders. This did nothing the quell the uneasiness that many colonists were beginning to feel. Several people besides Danziger mentioned that they'd felt as though they were being watched, but all searches turned up empty.  
  
Despite this uncertainty, it was a landslide vote in favor of delaying their departure, at least for the time being. John strongly believed that it was necessary to stay put and find out what the Terrians wanted, but he urged everyone to be extra careful. It was also recommended that people travel in groups of three if they decided to venture from the immediate campground.  
  
Most were thankful for the day of rest and took advantage of it accordingly. Of course, the group avoided Devon who was angry that she was now another day behind schedule and Morgan who was more miserable than usual after his latest fight with Bess. While those two sulked the day away, the colonists spent their time investigating the nearby planes and hills of the valley.  
  
Magus, Walman and Alonzo marveled at the awe-inspiring beauty of the dense forest located to the north of camp. Baines, Mazatl and Danziger decided to explore the steep towering cliffs which were located eastward and were surprised to discover two caves. In truth, one was better described as an indentation carved out of the rock by centuries of erosion. However, the other cavern was much deeper with a single shaft that extended into a dark and sizable chamber in the center of the mountain.  
  
Denner, Cameron and Bess concentrated on gathering samples from the woods near the river to bring back for Julia to analyze. The doctor was very excited about the variety of plant life in the new territory, much of which bore an uncanny similarity to plants once found on Earth centuries before. In addition to dozens of herbs collected, there were many types of fruit trees as well as bushes bearing edible berries. True crinkled her nose at the strange sight of a particularly dirt-ridden tuber. Yale attempted to explain that the vegetable, once known as a potato, had been quite popular back on Earth and could also be quite tasty. Skeptically looking at the ugly plant, True definitely had her doubts.  
  
Although the uncertainty of what the Terrians wanted from them still hung over their heads, the Edenites took comfort in their delightful surroundings and that their stomachs were full for the first time in weeks. That evening, the majority of the crew happily sat by the campfire, talking and joking.  
  
Uly clamored for John to retell his favorite ghost story about a haunted pirate ship as True shook her head in disgust. Everyone knew that tale backwards and forwards due to Uly's repeated requests for her father to tell it. Devon sat in the far corner quietly conversing with Yale and was seemingly oblivious to Danziger as he retold the fable with Uly and True positioned at his feet. Bess and Morgan sat together, but it was clear by their expressions and posturing that they still had not worked out their problems. However, at least Morgan had been able to persuade his wife to move back into their tent.  
  
As the night wound down to a close and the crew made their way to their quarters, John was still feeling less than confident about their situation. He finally approached Devon and suggested that perhaps they should double or triple the sentry duty. Devon soundly rejected the idea saying that she wasn't going to keep half the camp awake just because the mechanic allowed his paranoia to get the best of him.  
  
As it turned out, she was right. It wouldn't have made a bit of difference how many crew members were posted around the camp's perimeters. After all, the Terrians didn't have to physically show themselves to make their presence known.  
  
__________  
  
It was only moments after Devon closed her eyes that she felt herself being pulled onto the Dreamplane. She suddenly found herself in the center of a vast cavern. She could feel the heat of the Morganite which decorated the walls around and high above her. Its vividly detailed patterns reminded her of the stained glass windows of the ancient cathedrals that she had studied as a youth.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
She immediately noticed the difference between this Dreamscape and the one she'd experienced when Uly had been healed their second day planetside. The sound of her voice didn't endlessly reverberate and the mild vertigo- like sensation was gone. In fact, it didn't feel like a dream at all. Momentarily, she fearfully wondered if she had been somehow physically transported into the middle of a mountain.  
  
Before she had a chance to regain her bearings, several Terrians burst upward from the earth, surrounding her on all sides. And they weren't happy.  
  
"What do you want? Why did you bring me here?" Devon demanded.  
  
The Terrians continued to stare at her as she whirled around in a panic. She realized that even if she could get passed them, there was no way out.  
  
"What do you want?" she repeated.  
  
Finally, one of her possible captors trilled at her. You have been brought here to explain the actions of you and others like you.  
  
Devon was taken aback by the realization that she could clearly understand their language. "What actions are you talking about?"  
  
She could hardly believe her ears as the creatures began their intense interrogation. Unbeknownst to her, Devon wasn't the only Edenite summoned for answers.  
  
_____  
  
Uly was excited. He was hoping that he would get a chance to visit the Terrians in the mountains and it looked like they wanted to meet him, too. He eyed them with great interest. The child wasn't familiar with several of the tribes that were standing before him. Perhaps these new creatures would teach him more about traveling through the earth. Maybe they were going to give him his own lightning stick!  
  
He looked up and heartily trilled a greeting to his friends. The Terrians answered him and Uly's innocent smile disappeared.  
  
_____  
  
"Aw, shit. I must've fallen asleep on guard duty again," Walman mumbled to himself. "Devon's gonna kill me when she finds out."  
  
He staggered forward and found that he was trapped in a large cavern of some sort. Oh well, Walman reflected to himself, he'd certainly had worse nightmares than this. Actually, many of his recent dreams had been quite pleasant indeed. Maybe this was going to be one of them.  
  
"Hey, Magus. You around here somewhere?"  
  
Damn, I guess this just isn't my night, he thought after concluding that he was alone. As he reached out his hand to feel the warmth of the sunstone filled walls, six Terrians sprouted forth from the ground behind him.  
  
It's only a dream, Walman repeated over and over in an effort to encourage his heart that it was okay to start beating again.  
  
He took a deep breath and hesitantly asked, "Is there something that I can do for you?"  
  
The Terrians immediately trilled their angry response.  
  
_____  
  
"But why are you asking me these questions? I had nothing to do with what the penal colonists did to your planet!" Cameron expressed, completely baffled. "Besides, we freed you from Gaal!"  
  
You only agreed to assist us when the human child became ill. If it were not for the endangerment of his life, your group would have continued onward and allowed Gaal's death sentence to be carried out. An entire tribe would have been destroyed and a promise gone unfulfilled.  
  
"You don't know that," he countered.  
  
Who elected him spokesman for the entire race? If Cameron only knew...  
  
_____  
  
Humans are destroyers by nature. Throughout history, you have acted as though the needs of your species superseded all others. You consumed the natural resources of your Earth, finally murdering the planet. Now, your kind is here. Many of our tribes believe that you will ravage our lands, plundering its treasures until they are gone. Until we are gone.  
  
"I realize that there are many times in the past when humans have left nothing but destruction in their wake. I grew up on Earth and it was horrible. The pollution, the extinction of almost all of the plants and animals-"  
  
Bess realized that perhaps this train of thought wasn't helping her case. Switching tactics, she ventured, "But we've learned so much from the mistakes that we made. We want to work together with you to make sure that what became of Earth never happens here."  
  
What makes you think that humans deserve a second chance? In the past, your species has shown no fortitude regarding the protection of your environment.  
  
"But we've changed. Our group is different."  
  
As far as we know, you are the same as every other human collective that has been forced upon us. You bear no proof that you are dissimilar to others of your kind.  
  
"What kind of proof do you need?"  
  
While the Terrians looked to each other in search of an appropriate answer, Bess took a couple of full breaths as she tried to remain calm. She felt as though the verbal attack had been going on for hours. She knew that her explanations were very important and she was afraid of saying the wrong thing. It was obvious to her that this was the reason that they were brought to the valley. Not only did the Terrians have some burning questions, several of them seemed very confrontational.  
  
You asked about proof that your group is different. We have much evidence that proves that you are the same, no better than your ZEDs or penal colonists. You will now explain your role in the incident where part of the Mother was temporarily poisoned, disrupting our Dreamplane and trapping one of our brethren from a neighboring tribe.  
  
Oh, God, the geo-lock, Bess shuddered. Seems the Terrians were also ready to assign blame for crimes against nature. She had no idea if the other colonists were involved in the Terrian's inquest, but she silently prayed that they were having better luck than she was.  
  
_____  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! Please- please don't hurt me! Please let me go!!!"  
  
The Terrians cocked their heads in fascination as Morgan pushed passed them and started wildly clawing at the walls in the search for an exit. The creatures slowly moved toward him as he backed up as far into the corner of the cavern as possible.  
  
"Oh, no, oh, boy, okay, okay, think, Morgan, think." He nervously cleared his throat and stammered, "Look, whatever you think I did, I can assure you that it wasn't me."  
  
One Terrian leaned in toward him in curiosity. Already cracking from the pressure, Morgan blurted out, "Okay, maybe it was me. I mean, I get into trouble now and again, but I'm sure that, whatever it was, it was an accident. I'm sorry that I did it, whatever it was. Um, what did I do, again?"  
  
His eyes darted nervously from side to side as he threw his hands up in desperation. "What kind of planet is this, anyway? I'm trapped in a cave with a bunch of screeching piles of dirt... seven foot tall, really angry, piles of dirt." Tucking the hairs back into his ponytail, he had a burst of inspiration.  
  
"Wait a minute! That's it! I can fix this! Yes, yes, I can definitely fix this! I'm a lawyer! Just tell me what to write and I'll draw up the papers and sign it! It'll be nice and legal so you'll know that I'll never do it again... whatever it is that I did."  
  
The Terrians stood there in silence. They had expected to ask the human Morgan Martin about several questionable events that he had either been responsible for or taken part in since landing on the planet. However, the creatures were not used to an entity this erratic and unpredictable. They were befuddled as to how to go about extracting answers from this strange specimen.  
  
"BBBBBBBBBBBBBBEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!! Somebody help me! I've been marked for death! HHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPP!!!"  
  
_____  
  
You have harmed us.  
  
"We certainly would never intentionally cause you any pain. How have we harmed you?" Julia questioned in bewilderment. She could only imagine what the Edenites might have done to cause the Terrians to drag her into the Dreamplane and confront her with their actions.  
  
You conducted experiments on nine of our members.  
  
She shook her head and nervously exhaled. "I have never and would never experiment on a living being." A memory of her recent past came back to her. "I admit that I extracted samples of Uly's DNA and injected it into myself. I should never have done it and I swear to you that Uly was never placed in any danger. Since then, I've conducted various tests to learn more about the planet, but I've been very careful not to cause any damage to the ecosystem."  
  
That is a falsehood. Your kind captured nine of us and refused to allow them to return to the Mother. You knowingly extinguished their lives.  
  
"Our kind? I don't understand. Do you mean humans? Exactly who killed them?"  
  
The other tribe of humans like yourself.  
  
"Like myself? Do you mean doctors?" She paused, hoping that she was wrong. "Or do you mean the Council?"  
  
Yes.  
  
The picture was beginning to become clear and it did little to settle Julia's rising concern. "Was it a Council research team? Was it Franklin Bennett's group who experimented on you?"  
  
Yes.  
  
Julia could feel her heart jump into her throat. *We made a terrible mistake when we came here.* Those were Elizabeth Anson's words to them. It now made sense why Elizabeth and Bennett had been so evasive in relaying the specifics of their eight years on G889. They had committed unspeakable acts against the Terrians and were probably too afraid or ashamed to admit what they had done. No wonder they were so frightened when they woke up to find themselves still planetside. Perhaps Eve had only been one of their problems. Maybe the Terrians were about to make their group face the consequences of their actions and they were attempting to escape. Elizabeth had warned that the planet would reject them and now Julia knew why. Bennett's group had tortured and murdered nine of their compatriots, thus ruining any future trust forged between humans and Terrians. Julia was suddenly curious if Elizabeth and Bennett had really died of cold-sleep poisoning.  
  
All of these thoughts came to her within a fraction of a second. Julia swallowed hard and explained, "We didn't know. All of Bennett's data files were coded and we were never able to access the information. I am deeply sorry that they did those horrible things. But we are not from the same tribe of humans."  
  
You, Julia Heller, are a human?  
  
"Yes."  
  
You are a doctor?  
  
"Yes."  
  
You came to this planet as a member of the Council, the same tribe as Franklin Bennett and Elizabeth Anson.  
  
"Yes, initially I was working for the Council, but I realized-"  
  
Then you are the same.  
  
Julia exhaled sharply. She was being blamed for atrocities inflicted by others over fifty years ago. She had to somehow make them understand that humans think as individuals, not as part of a group collective. How was she going to convince them that every human being is unique?  
  
_____  
  
"But, I can assure you, that we are different from the others who came before us." Yale wiped the sweat from his brow as he struggled to remain calm. He had always been a patient man, but the hours and hours of the same questions were starting to unnerve him.  
  
He restated, "The penal colonists had committed and were convicted of capital crimes against humanity. They were sent here for the duel purpose of punishment and to be studied by the Council. You already know that this is why ZEDs roam the planet. ZEDs are both the gatherers of this knowledge and the prisoner's executioner after the data is collected. We, meaning the team of Eden Advance and those on their way here on the colony ship, are humans who have committed no crimes. We willingly agreed to come here with the goal of setting up a new society similar to what Earth was like before it was ruined by the avarice of our ancestors. Our hope is for us and our descendants to exist in a natural environment with untainted waters and blue skies. To live in peace with nature."  
  
Live in peace? You humans have conducted yourselves as if you have a divine entitlement to all that you see. What is not given freely, you take by force. You are selfish, bloodthirsty creatures.  
  
"I will agree with you that there have been many times that humans have displayed violent, if not barbaric, behavior toward themselves and others. But another very important quality of humanity is that we try to learn from our past in an effort for it not to be repeated."  
  
But it has been repeated. There are several within your group who have already harmed the Mother. Two of you have even killed your own kind since landing here. What is to stop you from continuing your wrathful ways and ultimately destroying us?  
  
Yale was surprised at the new line of questioning. Now, the Terrians were formally accusing specific members of Eden Advance of wrongdoings.  
  
He chose his words carefully. "Our group did not intend on hurting the planet and we have taken steps to ensure that it will not happen again. As for John and Morgan, yes, both have caused the death of other humans since their arrival here. However, there were extenuating circumstances which compelled them to behave as they did. I will be happy to explain to you the reasons for their conduct. Or perhaps you should ask them yourselves."  
  
We intend to obtain a full confession from both of them for their controversial and possibly reckless actions.  
  
A shiver went down Yale's spine. A confession? Why had it not occurred to him before? They were on trial.  
  
_____  
  
You are a murderer.  
  
"You're wrong. Yes, I've killed, but I'm not a murderer. There's a difference," Danziger adamantly denied. He definitely didn't like where this was going.  
  
Not to us.  
  
"That's not fair. You know exactly what happened in that cave. If I hadn't shot Katrina, she would have stabbed one of my friends. It was self- defense."  
  
Were there not other methods of stopping her without ending her life?  
  
"Look, by the time I got to the tunnel entrance, she was hovering over Devon with the knife above her head. If I hadn't taken the shot, Katrina would have plunged it into her chest. I had no choice." A flash of what might have occurred had he not interceded flashed briefly through his mind. John pushed the haunting image of Devon's blood-soaked body from his thoughts.  
  
There is always a choice.  
  
"Yes, there's always a choice and, believe me, the best course of action was to kill her. My God, that maniac had already murdered her own brother just seconds before! She was insane!"  
  
The mechanic vigorously added, "The Elder was there. Ask him and I'm sure that he'll back me up on this."  
  
He watched as the Terrians took a moment to confer among themselves. John knew that he was in big trouble. "Don't you think that I've replayed what happened that day hundreds of times in my mind? I don't care what you say. I made the right decision. I'd do it, again, if I was faced with the same situation."  
  
You have also willfully killed another inhabitant of this planet. Do you justify this savage murder, too?  
  
Danziger's entire demeanor immediately changed. In a quieter tone, he related, "No, I can't justify it except to say that it was an accident. It was never my intention to kill that Grendler. At the time, I really thought that she was attacking us though I have my doubts now. However, four people were saved from starving to death because of what I did. But that's no excuse and there's not a day that goes by that I don't think about it."  
  
You put the needs of humans above that of a Grendler, a being you considered to be beneath you.  
  
He shook his head. "No, that's not true. The Grendler was already dead. I was just trying to keep us alive long enough for our friends to rescue us. If you're asking me if I would've shot that Grendler for the sole purpose of eating her, I can honestly tell you that I wouldn't have. It was a terrible mistake. One that I'll regret until the day that I die."  
  
But how are we to know whether or not you will kill again? What assurances are you willing to give us?  
  
"Listen, I never meant to hurt anyone, human or otherwise. I sure as hell don't plan on killing again. I never wanted to in the first place. But there are a lot of variables out there. A lot of things that we haven't seen yet. God knows, that there are no guarantees in life. I can't make any absolute promises to you."  
  
That is unfortunate. You speak of remorse for your transgressions, yet you admit that you may cause suffering again. There is no way to know if you or your kind will harm the Mother.  
  
Danziger's brows furrowed in confusion. "What do you want me to say?"  
  
There are several of our tribes that feel that reparations should be made by the perpetrators of crimes against the planet. These acts of contrition would satisfy our need for justice and, hopefully, cause all future groups of humans to reconsider their perilous and destructive ways.  
  
"Are you looking for a scapegoat of some sort?"  
  
No. A scapegoat is one who bears the blame for the mistakes of others. We ask if you are willing to pay for your crimes.  
  
John was in complete and utter shock. Taking a few deep breaths to brace himself for his apparent fate, he hesitantly replied, "Before I answer, explain something to me. Am I being prosecuted for crimes that I've committed as an individual, as a member of Eden Advance? Or do you expect me to take the blame for every person that's ever lived here and broken your laws? In other words, am I being charged with the crime of being human?"  
  
Does it matter?  
  
__________ 


	3. 3/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 3  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
As the morning sun rose, Danziger shot up to the seated position in his cot. He was still disoriented from the Terrian's investigation and was drenched from head to toe in sweat. He wiped the dampness from his face with his shirt and tried to shake himself awake.  
  
That's when he heard the screams.  
  
Danziger's eyes immediately went to True's empty bunk. Not even bothering to put on his shoes, he barreled out of his tent calling his daughter's name. He wasn't at all prepared for what he saw.  
  
"Uly! Please Uly, answer me! Where are you, Sweetie?" came the petrified cries of Devon as she searched throughout the camp. John ran to her and grabbed her by the shoulders.  
  
"They took him!" she blurted out before he could say anything. "The Terrians kidnapped my son!"  
  
She took off toward the vehicles as Danziger anxiously surveyed the landscape. At the northwestern end of camp, he could see dozens of Terrians lining the hillside observing them. It was complete bedlam with Edenites running throughout camp looking for missing crew members as John began his own desperate hunt for his daughter.  
  
"True! True-Baby!"  
  
His pace quickened as he burst into the meal tent, stumbling directly into Bess. "Have you seen Morgan?" she asked in a frightened voice.  
  
Danziger shook his head. "True's missing, too." His throat was so tight, he could barely get the words out.  
  
Bess' eyes widened. "They can't find Julia or Alonzo, either. My God, what's happened?"  
  
After exchanging a look of pure dread, both resumed the search for their loved ones. They noticed that most of the Edenites had congregated at the base of the hills where the Terrians were holding court.  
  
"Where are they? Where's Uly?" Devon questioned in fright.  
  
You will not find them here. Your fellow humans are gone.  
  
"What do you mean 'gone'? Gone were?"  
  
They are no longer on this plane of existence.  
  
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Walman demanded. "Are you telling us that they're-" He stopped when he realized exactly what he was saying. He turned to look at Devon who was shaking violently.  
  
"Why?" Magus asked. "Why would you do this?"  
  
Uncertainty prevails among our tribes regarding the future role of humans on this planet. Many do not wish your presence here at all and believe that you should be punished for your harmful acts against the Mother.  
  
"Oh, no," Bess muttered.  
  
Other tribes are complacent and truly hopeful that your species has learned its lessons well. A few of us believe that, while most humans are destructive and selfish creatures, the people of Eden Advance are somehow different. We summoned you to this valley to obtain your testimony and make a final determination. However, we were not satisfied with many of the answers given by your group. Even those tribes who were sympathetic to your motives for the settlement of this planet now question if you can exist in harmony with nature. Some believe that you are destined to self- destruct as a species because your group lacks the necessary instincts for survival. Therefore, a compromise was reached within our collective. You, the remaining members of Eden Advance, will live out your lives in this valley. We will study your relationships with each other and your treatment of the Mother. Our tribes will learn from you and use this knowledge to assess the future of humanity on our planet.  
  
Baines was incensed. "Not a chance! You can't force us to stay here!"  
  
You will not be permitted to leave this mountain range. We will also prevent you from having contact with any other beings, human or otherwise. However, you will be allowed to enjoy a peaceful existence without our interference.  
  
Danziger didn't care about their new living arrangements. He just wanted his daughter. Taking a step forward, he begged in an anguished voice, "True, my little girl. Please-Please don't take her! In the cave, you asked me about taking responsibility for my actions. Well, I'm willing to accept the blame for the things I've done. I'll pay for my sins with my life if that's what you want!" He beat his closed fist against his chest. "But punish me, not her! She's an innocent child! Just spare her life! Please!"  
  
Bess also stepped forward. "And I'll change places with my husband. I'm just as guilty as he is. If one of us has to be sacrificed, let it be me!" she implored as tears poured down her cheeks.  
  
"You can't hurt my son! Please let me exchange places with him! Please let him live!" Devon was shaking so hard that it was difficult to understand her pleas for mercy.  
  
"And what about Alonzo and Julia? What crimes could they have committed that made it necessary for them to pay with their lives?" Yale beseeched.  
  
Our selections have been made and it is no longer possible to make alternate choices.  
  
"Oh, God, they're already dead," Denner whimpered under her breath as Cameron pulled her into a hug. "You're no better than the penal colonists and ZEDs! What gives you the right-" her words were lost as she sobbed into Cameron's shoulder.  
  
This is now your home. The examination begins.  
  
"Go to hell!" Magus spat as the Terrians disappeared into the earth.  
  
The Edenites stood there in horror, unable to move, much less digest their situation. Bess sank to her knees and began wailing Morgan's name. As she cried uncontrollably, Walman instinctively looked for Julia hoping she could administer a sedaderm to calm her down. It took a moment for him to realize that Julia was no longer there to help them. Denner and Cameron went to Bess and helped her to her feet. They slowly led her back to her tent, all the while Bess mumbling "They killed him. They killed my husband."  
  
Yale choked back his own tears and lamented, "We cannot do anything right now. Let us return to our tents and we will meet by the campfire in a few hours to discuss our options."  
  
"Options? What options?" Baines remarked incredulously. "They just murdered a third of our group and sentenced the rest of us to die in these godforsaken mountains!"  
  
"Shut up, Baines, and go to your tent!" Walman angrily barked. He turned to Danziger who silently stood next to him and appeared to be in shock. "John, I'm so sorry."  
  
As Walman reached out his hand to comfort him, the mechanic abruptly turned and began walking toward the forest leading to the river.  
  
"Let him go, Greg," Magus quietly said as she joined Walman's side. "He needs some time alone."  
  
"Is he going to be all right? I mean, should he really be by himself right now?"  
  
"I've known Danz a long time and I'm sure that he wouldn't intentionally hurt himself." Magus sighed and added, "But the answer to your other question is no. He's not going to be all right... ever."  
  
She took a deep breath and turned her attention to the cyborg. "Yale, why don't you help Devon back to her quarters. I'm going to get a sleep- aid from the med-tent so she can rest. I'll meet you in her tent in a few minutes."  
  
Yale began slowly guiding Devon away from the others as the group sluggishly returned to their campsite a few hundred yards away. Suddenly, the leader stopped in her tracks and shook her head violently.  
  
"No! They can't have him! I won't let them take my baby away!" she emphatically cried.  
  
Yale tried to console her by placing his arm around her shoulders, but she violently shoved him into a nearby pile of crates. Before the tutor could stop her, Devon broke into a sprint toward the hills where the Terrians had been moments before.  
  
John had heard her cries and turned just in time to see her crest the slope. "Devon, no! Stop!" he yelled as he ran full speed in her direction. Many of the other colonists followed in hot pursuit after them.  
  
Danziger heard her terrified scream as he reached the top of the hill.  
  
"John! Please help me!"  
  
Devon was rapidly sinking into the ground and was already submerged to her waist by the time he got to her. John forcefully threw his arms around her, grabbing her securely by the torso.  
  
"Hold on, Dev!" Danziger said as he grit his teeth and pulled with all of his might. However, she continued slipping deeper and deeper into the earth. Without warning, two Terrians burst from the ground directly behind her and trilled menacingly.  
  
"Oh, God, I'm going to die," Devon murmured in terror. She was now up to her shoulders in dirt and Danziger was desperately holding on to her flailing arms. The other Edenites reached the plateau and Mazatl and Walman firmly gripped the mechanic to steady him and provide additional strength.  
  
"No, Devon, you aren't gonna die!" John countered as he dug his bare feet into the ground to gain more resistance.  
  
"Stop this! Let her go!" he and the others screamed at the Terrians. They did nothing.  
  
Danziger was losing his tug-of-war battle as more and more of Devon's body disappeared from sight. Devon knew that her situation was hopeless and her blue eyes met John's and they wordlessly conveyed feelings of fear, love and a multitude of other emotions to each other.  
  
"John, I-"  
  
Before she could finish, there was a sudden exertion of force and Devon's head was pulled under. Danziger was jerked forward as his grasp slipped down to her outstretched hands. Eventually, his own arms were submerged as he struggled to keep hold of her.  
  
And then Devon's fingers were pried from his and she was consumed by the earth.  
  
One of the Terrians sank back into the ground, leaving the other to bear witness to John feverishly trying to shovel the dirt away with his hands without success. Several colonists were reminded of the similar scene of Devon furiously digging when Uly was first abducted and healed by the Terrians. However, they knew that this would not have the same happy ending.  
  
Walman hesitantly put his hand on Danziger's shoulder, but he angrily shrugged it off. He bitterly pounded his fist into the dirt.  
  
"Dammit, why?" Still crouched on the ground, he raised his head and bore his eyes into the lone Terrian. "Why did you have to take her, too?"  
  
You must remain within the boundaries of the valley and will not be permitted to leave. This is your home.  
  
With a war-like cry, the mechanic dove toward the creature. He was literally caught in midair by Walman and Mazatl and yanked backward so as not to cross the valley's border and meet the same harsh fate.  
  
"Shanking murderers!" Danziger bellowed as both men tackled him to the ground. He began to punch and kick wildly, angrily fighting to free himself from their grasp and exact his revenge on the Terrian. Baines and Yale joined in to try to hold the large man back as the scuffle became more precarious.  
  
"They didn't deserve this! My daughter didn't-" His words trailed off as Magus dove into the brawl and plunged a sedaderm into John's neck.  
  
After taking a moment to catch their bearings, Baines and Mazatl hoisted the now-unconscious mechanic to the standing position and each draped one of Danziger's limp arms around their shoulders. Knowing that nothing more could be done, they carried him back to his quarters in silence.  
  
Halfway down the hill, Magus looked back to find that the Terrian was gone.  
  
__________  
  
That evening the remainders of Eden Advance, with the exception of John, Bess and Yale, solemnly gathered around the crackling campfire. John and Bess were still under the effects of the sedaderms administered to them earlier in the day. Yale was simply too distraught from the loss of Devon and Uly to participate in any group discussions and chose to remain in his tent.  
  
"What are we gonna do now?" Magus asked in bewilderment.  
  
Cameron added, "We can't stay here the rest of our lives."  
  
"I'm not going to die here!" Baines exclaimed.  
  
"Jesus, one at a time, guys!" Walman shook his head and wondered how he suddenly got elected crew leader. "I don't know what to do. We need to regroup and think about this rationally."  
  
"Sure, let's think rationally about the massacre of our friends," Mazatl bitterly snapped. "The Terrians killed our leader, our doctor and the person they handpicked to communicate with them."  
  
"They also murdered two children," Denner dismally pointed out.  
  
"And poor Morgan." Magus was completely at a loss. "What kind of sick creatures could do something like this? Besides, I thought that the Terrians lacked the aggression to act this way."  
  
Mazatl sardonically replied, "Yeah, and who told us this? Alonzo, the Terrian's mouthpiece. And where is their Dreamer now? Dead, along with his girlfriend."  
  
"I guess maybe he misunderstood them."  
  
"No, I'm willing to bet that Solace heard it right. I never bought into that 'we can't do anything because we lack aggression' bullshit the Terrians tried serving us. Don't forget that they had no problem killing Gaal once they were freed from the shock collars," Walman remarked.  
  
Baines noted, "They sure didn't think twice about condemning Yale, Morgan and Bess to death after the geo-lock was set off. They would've killed Yale if Mary hadn't interceded."  
  
"And poor Mary was disowned and cast out into the snow for her troubles. She probably froze to death," Denner sadly acknowledged.  
  
"Last night's Dreamplane experience was a real eye-opener for me," Cameron disclosed. "The Terrians grilled me for hours about things that I had nothing to do with. They blamed us for everything!"  
  
"Like the ZEDs and penal colonists."  
  
"Bennett's group and the Council," Walman said, nodding in agreement. "They asked me a lot about Eden Advance, too."  
  
"They gave me the third degree about Julia's role in our group."  
  
Denner revealed, "They also questioned me about True's friendship with Gaal before she knew the kind of person that he really was. They actually accused her of being his accomplice."  
  
"Yeah, and Morgan's role in opening the cold-sleep chambers of Bennett's group and accidentally killing them. They also asked a lot about the geo-lock," Baines added.  
  
"And about Danziger killing that Grendler and Katrina."  
  
"They asked me why our group argued so much. Why Devon is-" Cameron ruefully paused when he realized his mistake, "was so combative toward everyone after the Terrians healed her."  
  
Magus replayed her own interrogation by the Terrians in her mind and was abruptly hit with a strange realization. "Wait a minute, was anyone asked about Uly? I mean, did the Terrians mention anything about crimes that he supposedly committed?"  
  
"Come to think of it, no."  
  
"Me, either," Denner reflected. "Why would they decide to kill him?"  
  
"Uly was the link between us and the Terrians," Walman rationalized. "I guess they no longer wanted that connection between our species. They no longer had any use for him."  
  
"Maybe that's why they got rid of Alonzo, too, since he was the only other person in our group who had real access to the Terrians," Mazatl suggested.  
  
Cameron's head shot up in amazement. "My God, Elizabeth Anson was right. Don't you see it? The planet is rejecting us. At least, until the Terrians make a final decision about whether or not humans can live here."  
  
"I just had a terrible thought," Denner worriedly exclaimed. "What about when the colony ship arrives in fifteen months? We have to warn them."  
  
"Forget warning them! That's our ride home! We need to somehow let them know that we're here so they can rescue us!" Mazatl countered.  
  
"I can try to rig something to contact our transmitter at New Pacifica. Maybe we can send a message telling the ship our coordinates and they can come get us. We also need to let them know that they're in danger and that the planet isn't safe."  
  
"Do you really think that you can do it, Baines?" Walman asked with renewed hope.  
  
"I can sure as hell try. I bet Danziger can wire the equipment and I can program the necessary information into it."  
  
"I wouldn't count on Danziger's help. He's probably too grief- stricken to be of much use."  
  
Magus gloomily concurred, "Yeah, he's lost more than any of us. His daughter. Devon, the woman he was in love with. Uly, who'd pretty much become like a son to him. 'Lonz and Julia, two of his closest friends. We can't depend on John to lead us like before. I think that we need to handle this ourselves. And we should do everything that we can to support him, along with Yale and Bess."  
  
The rest of the Edenites agreed when a soft voice came from behind them.  
  
"I'm sorry to interrupt you, but could I ask you all a favor?"  
  
"Of course, Bess. Anything," Walman earnestly replied.  
  
The Earth-res slowly approached the group and they turned to give her their full attention. The firelight illuminated her face, revealing her swollen eyes and pale, tearstained cheeks. They had never seen Bess look so disheveled with her hair matted to her head and her clothes completely rumpled. It was a shock to many of them to see her this way. Over the months as Bess' initial selfishness had subsided, she had become the emotional center of the crew. She almost always wore a smile on her face and was often the only person who could focus on the bright side of an otherwise bleak situation. When Devon was taken ill, Bess worked tirelessly to try to keep everyone's spirits up. She made sure to spend plenty of time with every member of Eden Advance, sometimes talking and sometimes just listening to them air their fears and vent their frustrations. Of course, she wasn't able to get through to Danziger who backed away from any conversation that contained even the slightest emotional edge to it. However, she alleviated some of his leadership burdens by taking on the inventory and food supply duties. She also kept Uly and True occupied with various projects to keep them concentrated on things beside Devon's sickness and John's lack of quality time for the both of them.  
  
And throughout it all, Bess always seemed to manage to stay above the fray. Even when she and Morgan were quarreling, an event that had unfortunately become a familiar occurrence, Bess always conveyed a cheerful and optimistic attitude. Looking at her appearance now, the Edenites almost didn't recognize her.  
  
"Could you organize some type of a funeral service for Morgan and the others?" she meekly asked. "I was also hoping that you could construct some type of grave markers for each of them. I know that there aren't any bodies-" Choking back a sob, she continued, "Anyway, I thought that maybe we could set aside a bit of land for a cemetery. A good place might be where we spoke with the Terrians this morning. It was just a thought."  
  
Seeing her in this condition caused a lump to form in Walman's own throat. "I think that's a good idea. We'll start working on the headstones tomorrow morning, but it'll probably take two or three days to get everything finished. Is that gonna be okay?"  
  
"That'll be fine. Thank you," she answered simply and tried to force a small smile.  
  
Magus queried, "Can we do anything else for you, Bess? Is there anything that you need?"  
  
"No. Well, actually I was scheduled for supper duty tomorrow. Could someone else please take my place? I-I don't think that I'm quite up to it yet."  
  
The group was amazed by Bess' humble request. Even in her state of intense mourning, she was still thinking about the others instead of herself.  
  
"Don't worry about any of that stuff. We'll make sure everything gets done," Denner responded reassuringly. "And if you need to talk, just know that we're all here for you."  
  
"Thanks. Well, goodnight," Bess quietly expressed and wandered back to her empty quarters at the far end of camp.  
  
"Goodnight, Bess," the entire group uttered. When she was no longer in view, many of them allowed their tears to flow freely.  
  
__________  
  
Three days later, the memorial service was held. Six grave markers chiseled in stone lined the base of the large hill, each bearing the name of one of Eden Advance's fallen comrades. Standing there and actually seeing the names gave the situation a finality what was almost too much for the survivors to bear.  
  
Alonzo Solace, Julia Heller, Morgan Martin, Devon Adair, Ulysses Adair and True Danziger. Their friends. Their family. The people they loved. Gone forever. Almost all of the remaining Edenites gathered together to share their intense sorrow and say good-bye. The sense of loss was overwhelming. Some wept openly while others held their heads downward in silent prayer. Cameron took Denner's hand and held it tightly in an effort to comfort them both. Yale attempted to say a few words, but was quickly overpowered by his tremendous grief. Bess silently kneeled in front of her husband's headstone and laid a grouping of wildflowers. She ran her fingers over the carving bearing Morgan's name and whispered an ancient Catholic prayer. As Bess rose to her feet, she made a gesture with her hand that Yale recognized as another religious ritual known as the Signs of the Cross. She turned and quietly walked back to camp, the others following behind her.  
  
As most returned to their tents to mourn privately, Magus grabbed a pair of jumpers and made her way to the edge of the woods leading to the river. She scanned the forest and refocused the equipment until she could see a figure sitting alone at the water's edge.  
  
"What are ya' doing, Laura?" came a voice directly behind her.  
  
Magus about jumped out of her skin and Walman placed his hands on her upper arms to steady her. After regaining her composure, she handed him the device and guided his view until it fell upon John Danziger in the distance.  
  
No one had really seen the mechanic much those past few days. He didn't join the others in the meal tent or by the campfire at night. He had also refused to help construct the markers or take part in the funeral ceremony. Instead, he sat in silence all day long at the banks of the river. He would only vacate his perch when another Edenite came to the lake to bathe or do the washing. Danziger would then march straight to his tent, never meeting their gaze or saying a word.  
  
"Just wanted to check on him," Magus stated in a concerned tone.  
  
"I'm worried about him, too," Walman acknowledged. "I've tried talking to him, but he leaves whenever anyone gets near him."  
  
"I'm hopeful that he'll get better as time goes on," she remarked. "Until then, it looks like you're in charge."  
  
Walman blinked at her in perplexity.  
  
Magus placed a hand on her hip and stated, "Come on, Greg. Danz is out of commission, who knows for how long. Someone needs to step into the role of leader. And that someone is definitely you."  
  
"Why me? How'd I get so lucky?" he asked in disbelief.  
  
"Because you're a natural. Whether you admit it or not, you've taken control of the goings on around here. And you're also one of the few people who haven't given up hope of us getting out of this valley."  
  
Walman took a deep breath and thought about his possible new role. He wasn't sure that he wanted the responsibility of keeping the remaining Advancers alive and healthy. It would also mean that he would be in charge of executing any escape plans. What if he made a wrong decision and it cost more lives? He didn't know if he would ever be able to sleep again if that occurred.  
  
"Why don't you take over, Magus? You were the only one who kept her head when the Terrians passed their death sentence. You kept Danziger from getting himself killed by giving him that sedaderm after Devon died. I know that you've been making sure that Yale, Bess and Danz are eating. Face it, Laura, you should be our leader."  
  
She was taken a bit by surprise at the idea. She wanted to help in any way that she could, but wasn't really certain if she was up to the task of sole leadership. Picking up the slack left by indisposed or departed Eden Advance members was one thing. However, directing the moves of the surviving crew was quite another. Maybe a compromise was in order.  
  
"Tell you what. Why don't we work together as partners? That is, until John gets himself together enough to retake control of the group. We could be the temporary management."  
  
Walman intently considered her suggestion. Despite the added pressure and their foreboding future, working so closely with Magus could have its advantages.  
  
"I like the sound of that. Wanna meet in your tent later tonight and work out the particulars?"  
  
"Sounds good to me." Sounds really good to me, Magus reflected. Her skin tingled a bit at the thought of the handsome Ops crewman alone in her quarters, even if it was only for business purposes.  
  
__________  
  
Time slowly passed and it had been three agonizing weeks since Morgan had been torn from Bess' life. As the majority of the other members of Eden Advance concentrated on various methods of escaping their Terrian prison, the Earth-res spent much of her days positioned under a particularly large maple tree located in the woods to the north of camp. Its draping branches shielded her from the sun and the fallen leaves covered its protruding roots and provided a soft cushion for her to sit.  
  
Although both she and Yale had now rejoined the group for their meals and by the evening campfire, Bess was still apprehensive about spending too much time with the other Edenites. She shied away from their looks of compassion and pity. Of course, she knew that they meant well. She probably would act the same way if it were someone else who'd suddenly become a young widow, but that certainly didn't make it any easier. She needed to be alone so she could process the deaths of her husband and her close friends. She needed to be alone so she could pray to her God for guidance and mercy for the surviving members of her family. She needed to be alone so she could cry her eyes out until there were no more tears left.  
  
Bess also needed something, anything to keep her occupied. Realizing that they were now stranded without a doctor, she began to familiarize herself with Julia's medical equipment including her Diaglove. Unfortunately, there weren't exactly any instruction manuals laying around and Yale's library database was limited to a glossary of terminology. They were on their own when it came to figuring out the actual applications of the machinery. Bess downloaded the tutor's files into her own miniature vid-terminal and used the Diaglove to scan various items. She would then begin the incredibly laborious process of translating what each word meant. It would take hours to decipher the possible toxicity of something as simple as a leaf or a puddle of water. However, at least she felt that she was contributing to the welfare of the group on some level. Besides, it was better than spending all day lying in bed and feeling sorry for herself.  
  
It was late afternoon when she was approached by a very nervous Walman. "I'm sorry to disturb you, Bess, but we, um, we could use your help."  
  
She didn't meet his gaze and continued to study the overall components of a blade of grass. "What can I do for you, Walman?" she said, almost too evenly.  
  
"There's something wrong with Danziger."  
  
She dropped her shoulders and looked up at him in amazement. "Well, of course there's something wrong with Danziger," she chided. "He's lost everything he's ever cared about."  
  
Walman shook his head emphatically. "No, you don't understand. There's something very wrong with him. No one's seen him eat for at least two days. He's just sitting there, not talking or even moving. He acts like we aren't even there."  
  
Bess tore the Diaglove from her hand and hurriedly began tossing the medical equipment into her knapsack. As she jumped to her feet, she scolded, "Why didn't you come get me sooner?"  
  
"Because we didn't want to bother you. You're going through so much right now. We didn't want to add to your burden."  
  
"My friends aren't a 'burden'," she snapped and turned to head in the direction of the river.  
  
"No, he's not that way," Walman disclosed. "John's at the cemetery. Magus says that he's been there since she woke up this morning."  
  
"What?"  
  
Bess knew that there was trouble if John was at the graveyard. As far as anyone knew, he'd never been there once. Baines had noticed that Danziger even refused to look in its direction. The fact that he was there now in such a despondent state didn't sound good.  
  
Bess handed her filled bag to Walman. "I'll speak with him. I need you to have two meals prepared in the mess-tent and John and I will need some privacy so we can talk. Will you see to it that everyone leaves us alone for awhile?"  
  
He nodded as Bess pulled out her pocket knife and cut a few stems of lavender blooms from a nearby flowering bush.  
  
She and Walman parted ways and he returned to their campground to usher the worried Edenites back into their respective tents or at least out of visibility. He and Magus fixed two plates of food for their friends and then went back to her quarters until Bess told them that the coast was clear.  
  
John was planted directly in front of True's headstone, stoically sitting with his legs crossed in front of him. His arms were loosely folded with his elbows resting on his thighs. He just stared straight ahead, boring his gaze into the letters of his daughter's name.  
  
Bess came upon him slowly, so as not to startle him. She wasn't sure how he would react to her presence. She slid passed him and sank down in front of Morgan's marker. Bess tossed aside the flowers that she'd placed at his grave the prior day and began to absently fiddle with the newer blossoms.  
  
Finally pivoting her head toward the mechanic, she beckoned, "John?"  
  
She wasn't given a response and tried again. "John?"  
  
Never shifting his view from directly in front of him, he quietly requested, "Please go away, Bess."  
  
Good, he spoke to her. One hurdle down, Bess noted. "You don't have to talk if you don't want to, but would you mind if I just sit here with you for awhile?"  
  
"Suit yourself," came the indifferent reply.  
  
She turned her attention back to her husband's headstone and smoothed out the grass that had begun to replenish around it. After a few moments of stillness, she reflected, "I still miss him so much. I think that it's just starting to sink in. You know, the fact that Morgan's gone forever. Even though sometimes we didn't get along so well, I'd never really imagined my life without him."  
  
"I thought you said that you were just gonna sit here," Danziger stated in a monotone voice.  
  
"No, I said that you didn't have to talk if you didn't want to." She scooted a few feet toward him and positioned herself in the space between Devon and Uly's graves. "Actually, I've been working myself up to asking you a favor."  
  
For the first time, he turned his head to face her and Bess was alarmed at how gaunt he looked. He had lost at least fifteen pounds, if not more. John's normally expressive blue eyes were dull and unfocused and there were darkened circles underneath them. He blankly stared at her and waited for Bess to ask her question.  
  
"These past few weeks have been a real struggle for me. I've tried discussing what I'm going through with the others, but they don't really completely understand because they've never dealt with this type of loss. And you're the only person besides Cameron who's experienced the death of their companion."  
  
"Cameron?" Danziger cocked his head in confusion.  
  
"I'm sorry, I thought you knew. His fiancee was killed in a shuttle crash about a year before he was hired for Eden Project. Anyway, I considered talking to him about what I'm feeling right now, but he's just found love again with Denner. Even with everything going on around us, he's happy and I don't want to bring him down by reminding him of Pamela. I know that you and Morgan weren't exactly friends, but it would be a big help to me if I could just talk to you about him." She shrugged her shoulders. "Besides, misery loves company, right?"  
  
Bess moved over until she sat directly next to him. "I promise not to pry into your personal life. I might ask you a general question or two, but you don't have to answer it if you don't want to. You don't have to say a word at all. Just sit there and listen to me ramble."  
  
He took a deep breath and glanced downward at the ground. "It's not that I don't want to help you, Bess. I just don't think that I can. I'm too-"  
  
"Please, John, I need this. You're the only person who can help me," she expressed in an anguished voice. Originally, she was using the tactic of sharing her grief with him as a ploy to get Danziger to open up to her. However, as the words left her mouth, she realized that her urgent pleas to him were the truth. Bess really did need someone to share her grief with and John was the most suitable person for the job.  
  
He thought about it for a moment and softly concurred. "Okay."  
  
"Thanks. I can't tell you how much this means to me." She hesitated, then asked, "Is now an okay time to bend your ear? I'm on my way to the meal tent for a late lunch. Would you care to join me?"  
  
Danziger wasn't stupid and knew exactly what Bess was doing. However, he couldn't stay in the graveyard forever and, come to think of it, he was a little bit hungry. Besides, Bess needed his assistance and he might as well try to do something constructive with his time. Bess let out an inner sigh of relief as the mechanic reluctantly nodded.  
  
She rose to her feet and took a few steps backward hoping to lead him out of the cemetery, but he didn't follow. She rejoined him as he sat on his knees and stared sadly at his daughter's empty grave. John ever-so- slowly leaned forward and kissed the top of her headstone.  
  
"Happy birthday, True-girl," he whispered.  
  
Without another word, Danziger stood and made his way to the meal tent, leaving Bess in shock. She took a moment to stifle her tears and swallow her cries before catching up to him just as he entered the dwelling.  
  
After eating a full meal, John went back to his tent and packed up all of True's belongings. He carried them to the Transrover and stored them in one of its innermost compartments. That evening, he joined the others for the first time at the campfire.  
  
__________ 


	4. 4/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 4  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
"All right, Zero, you know what to do," Baines asserted as he punched a few keys located on the robot's chest. The group had labored over a month to ready the man-like machine for a very special mission. Now, all nine members of Eden Project were assembled together near the edge of camp to bid farewell to Zero and see if all of their hard work would pay off.  
  
"Most certainly, Sir. You have programmed my entire route which should be no problem for my frame to navigate. In addition, my sensors should detect-"  
  
"Okay, okay, okay. We know that you're up to the job," Walman interrupted. "Just remember, if any Terrians show up, just, um," he shrugged his shoulders and looked at Magus, "act natural."  
  
"And get the hell away from them," Baines added.  
  
Zero was always happy to remind them of his superior craftsmanship. "That will not be difficult. I am equipped with several devices which-"  
  
"We know!" the entire group chimed in unison.  
  
Yale instructed, "Just remember that you have to get within two hundred miles of New Pacifica for the communication dish to receive our message. We are counting on you to warn the colonists on the Jamestown that their lives are in danger if they land."  
  
"And you have to tell them our location so they can rescue us," Mazatl pointed out.  
  
"My memory banks have been programmed with that knowledge and all information will be relayed when the goal is reached. I will now leave for New Pacifica."  
  
A large hand patted the robot on the back. "Good luck, Zero."  
  
"Good luck to you, John Danziger and to the rest of the members of Eden Advance. I will start my video processing unit now," the robot cheerfully said and began his slow march-like steps.  
  
The plan was to venture southward fifteen clicks, retracing the group's steps from five weeks ago. Once there, Zero would resume the Edenites' original course which had already been previously mapped out. The crew would be able to monitor his movements with the help of a visual and audio hookup which broadcast to a vid-screen located in the navigation tent. However, the span of transmission was limited so they would rely on a homing beacon to know the robot's location once he was out of range.  
  
The Advancers herded around the monitor in the map tent to watch as Zero was about to take his first steps out of the valley. Things were looking good. Perhaps the Terrians didn't consider the robot a threat to their survival and would let him travel undisturbed.  
  
"I am picking up several sensory disturbances around me. I do not have a visual-" The image on their screen suddenly lurched and Zero communicated in an all-too-pleasant voice, "Warning! Both of my legs have been secured by an unseen object and my frame is being pulled underground by force. After analyzing thousands of different suppositions programmed into my hard-drive, I calculate that, with the probability factor of ninety- seven percent, this event is what is commonly known as an ambush."  
  
The group could only watch helplessly as the robot was dragged downward into the earth by the Terrians. As the ground encompassed him, Zero relayed, "This will alter my original calculations and it is unlikely that my mission to New Pacifica will be completed. It is with the probability factor of-"  
  
Silence filled the room and Walman slammed his open fist against the now-dark monitor. "Shit!"  
  
"Poor Zero," Magus murmured as she leaned her head into her hands on the desk.  
  
"Poor Zero? Poor us!" Baines exclaimed in exasperation. "That bucket of bolts was our best chance of getting out of here!"  
  
She responded, "I know that this is a setback, but we'll figure another way out of this valley."  
  
"I still think we should use the river," Walman put forth the suggestion he'd mentioned several times previously. "As far as we know, the Terrians can't swim."  
  
"Yeah, well neither can most of us," Danziger countered flatly from the back of the room. "Besides, those rough waters'll rip you, along with any boat that you build, to shreds."  
  
"Look, we know from Yale's satellite maps that the river continues westward until it dumps into the Sea of Antius. Who's to say that the water's path doesn't flow more smoothly outside of this mountain range? It could be easy to navigate," Walman piped back, unwilling to let the idea go.  
  
John took a sip of coffee before relating, "We have no idea what's out there. And if you capsize and the current or the sharp rocks don't kill you, what then? You think the Terrians are gonna welcome you with open arms when you reach the shore?"  
  
"Well, we have to try something!" Baines snapped.  
  
Bess stood from her chair and directed her question to Danziger. "What about the Hoverscout that I got from the Grendler last year? Do you think that you could fix it?"  
  
"Why would we waste our time on that piece of junk?" Cameron queried before John could respond.  
  
The wheels in Yale's mind began to turn and he excitedly answered, "Because when it operates properly, it can transmit data about a topographical region up to a radius of thirty miles."  
  
"Exactly. We can see what's really out there and then decide whether or not the river can be used for traveling purposes."  
  
"That is a wonderful idea, Bess," Yale warmly encouraged.  
  
John nodded his own approval. "I'll get working on it tonight."  
  
"Wait a minute. If the Hoverscout was fixable before, why are you waiting until now to repair it?" Mazatl scoffed loudly in annoyance. "We could have been using it the whole time!"  
  
"Well, if you must know, I'm not sure if I can get it operational again. It was heavily damaged by the crash and I'm gonna have to rebuild most of the circuitry." Danziger's eyes blazed at the verbal attack and he growled, "And as for waiting so long to get around to fixing it, I had a few other more pressing issues to deal with at the time. Like maintaining the vehicles, not to mention trying to keep your sorry asses alive! So deal with it, Mazatl."  
  
The mechanic slammed his cup on the table with a loud bang and stormed out of the tent, leaving the others staring after him in surprise.  
  
"Nice going, Maz," Walman scolded as Cameron lightly smacked the offending crewman on the arm.  
  
Bess conveyed in a calm voice, "No, I'm glad that you said it. I didn't agree with it, but it got John angry enough that his instincts kicked in. That's the most emotional he's been since True and Devon died."  
  
"Fantastic," Baines cynically remarked. "Let's just keep pissing Danziger off and he'll be back to normal in no time."  
  
__________  
  
Sometimes the nights never seemed to end. Bess would lay in bed for hours and stare up at the canvas ceiling. Thinking. Remembering. Mourning. It had been almost two months since her beloved husband's death. She also noted that Eden Advance was only a few weeks shy of the first anniversary of their crash landing on the planet. She stirred uncomfortably at the memories. If they had only known then what lay ahead...  
  
Her thoughts suddenly drifted to the chore roster. Was she scheduled for breakfast duty in the morning or was it the day after tomorrow? Not wanting to neglect her job and grateful for the excuse to leave her cot, Bess threw her jacket over her nightgown and exited her quarters. She stumbled in the darkness toward the meal tent where all the work-lists were posted.  
  
She had just passed the Dunerail when a deep voice pierced the quiet night air. "If you're on your way to Magus' tent, I'd wait a little while. She and Walman are kind of indisposed right now." The word 'indisposed' was spoken with the slightest hint of sarcasm. She rotated around to see Danziger sitting on the ground with his back up against the vehicle.  
  
"Oh," the Earth-res said as she made her way over to him. "You didn't accidentally walk in on them, did you?"  
  
"Didn't have to. I could hear 'em all the way from the supply tent."  
  
Bess cracked a small smile. A few weeks ago, Walman had finally gotten up the courage to tell Magus how he really felt about her. Well, he didn't exactly tell her in so many words, but the feelings were conveyed nonetheless. Ever since that time, they'd been sharing much more than just their duties as provisional co-leaders of Eden Advance. Recently, Walman had taken up permanent residence in Magus' tent. Although everyone was thrilled that they had found one another, it often meant sleepless nights for just about everyone else. Baines joked that either they were going to have to move the couple's quarters to the far end of camp or start investing in earplugs.  
  
Bess plopped down in the soft grass next to the mechanic, her search for the roster now forgotten. She eyed the pieces of the Hoverscout spread out in front of him. "Are you having any luck with that thing?"  
  
"Got most of it rewired and it should be ready for a trial in a couple more days," he answered as he delicately tucked in one of its filaments and replaced the console. After gently setting the equipment down, he looked up to meet her gaze. "Listen, this was a really good idea you had about using the 'Scout, but I need for you to do me a favor. I know that you've always been an optimistic person-"  
  
"Not as much, recently," she sighed.  
  
"Well, that's to be expected, but please don't put all of your hopes into this thing working. Everybody here seems convinced that once we get this machine up and running, it's gonna tell us that it's smooth sailing to New Pacifica. It's like they all think that the Terrians'll let us sit there on the beach and wait until our ship comes in." He shook his head as he began cleaning off his hands with a worn rag.  
  
"And you don't think that's going to happen, do you?"  
  
"Honestly?" He shifted uncomfortably and remet her gaze. "No. The Diggers said that they won't let us leave and I believe them. They destroyed Zero because he would've enabled us to contact the others, something else the Diggers said that we were never allowed to do."  
  
Bess' eyes widened. "So you think that we're stuck here for the rest of our lives." It came out as more of a statement than a question. *We're all going to die here* flashed over and over in her mind.  
  
"Yes, I'm sorry, but I do. And I don't think the rest of the group is prepared to hear that. They're concentrating on getting out of this valley when instead we should be preparing ourselves for another cold winter."  
  
He could see that his words were having a strong effect on her and she appeared to be blinking back a tear. He leaned in and softly conveyed, "I don't mean to upset you, Bess. I just want you to ready yourself for the very real possibility that we are going to be here a long time."  
  
She nodded as she drank in his startling disclosure. Taking a moment for reflection, she admitted that what Danziger said made perfect sense. Deep down, she'd probably known it all along. The nine surviving Edenites were destined to be guinea pigs, a sacrifice to help the Terrians determine humanity's role in the future of G889. Plus, they had been found guilty of crimes against the planet and this valley was designated as their jailhouse. In short, the Terrians would never let them leave alive.  
  
Danziger continued, "Anyway, the temperature's already starting to get cooler. We probably only have a month or two before the snow starts rolling in. There's no time to set up permanent shelters, so I think we'll probably end up spending the winter in the cave located east of here. We can park the vehicles in the smaller cavern to try and protect them as much as possible. We also need to start figuring out ways to increase our food reserve enough to get us through the season. I've noticed that the berries and fruits are already starting to die out."  
  
He stopped when he noticed Bess was staring at him with a stunned expression on her face. He momentarily wondered if he should have shared his somber projections with her. After all, her heart was already so heavily weighed down by the loss of Morgan and the others. He didn't want to see her have to suffer any more than she already had.  
  
"I'm sorry, Bess. I shouldn't have told you any of this."  
  
Bess regained her composure and thought about the situation rationally. "No, you were right to tell me. We need to ready ourselves for winter. Maybe Yale or Julia's files have information about canning so we can make our food supply last longer."  
  
John was feeling a little better about his decision to confide in her. "Good. It would help a lot if you could look into that. I should have been doing all of this from the start, but I was kind of-" He shrugged his shoulders and absently looked up at the night sky. Neither of them had been much help to anyone these past two months. "Well, right now all of my time is being spent on getting this stupid piece of junk in the air. After that's done, I'll be able to do more." He added as an afterthought, "I didn't mean to dump all of this on you though."  
  
"I'm glad that you did," she reassured.  
  
It encouraged her that Danziger's leadership instincts were beginning to kick in, again. She studied his features and noticed that he'd regained some of the weight that he'd lost, although he still had several more pounds to go. He was less pale, but his eyes lacked the overall intensity that they'd had before True's death. His voice was still nearly a whisper and rarely veered from a monotone. But at least he was speaking more frequently, even if it was only regarding camp business and nothing more.  
  
"Are you going to take over as leader, again?"  
  
John leaned his head back against the metal of the 'Rail and let out a slow breath. "I don't think so. Walman and Magus are doing a good job of keeping everyone organized and their spirits up." He closed his eyes and sighed. "And, for what it's worth, I hope they're right. I hope that there really is a way to get us to the west coast. I just don't want everyone's expectations to be raised only to have everything blow up in our faces."  
  
__________  
  
The air was charged with excitement as the Edenites gathered together in the center of camp to see if Danziger had indeed performed a miracle. He'd been working day and night for almost three weeks to repair the extensively damaged Hoverscout. The mechanic had scavenged wires and spare parts from a multitude of items including the 'Rail and Julia's medical instruments to try to pull off the near-impossible task of bringing the equipment back from the dead. The job had actually been completed five days earlier, but heavy rainstorms impeded any earlier tests of the craft's abilities.  
  
Now that the weather seemed to be letting up, the group enthusiastically circled the apparatus which sat in its place of honor on a large folding table near the 'Rover. There was almost a party-like atmosphere as Denner gleefully passed out cups of fruit-punch, a new recipe that she and Cameron had recently concocted. Walman was sitting on a crate with Magus resting comfortably on his knee. Both were giggling at some privately shared joke. Baines and Mazatl were in a jovial discussion about the first thing they were going to do when they got back to the safety of the Space Stations. Bess and Yale strolled together in quieter conversation, carefully avoiding several puddles and still-wet patches of grass as they walked. Although they tried not to appear too encouraged, the look of hope was written all over both of their faces. John sat silently on the rear bed of the Transrover with his legs dangling over the side, his own expression hidden by his sunglasses and dirty-blond curls.  
  
Yale left Bess' side and approached the table. "I think that we should get started."  
  
They held their breath in nervous anticipation as the tutor commanded to the machine, "Hoverscout, activate."  
  
A low hum immediately emanated from the equipment.  
  
"Hoverscout, commence levitation. Rise to the height of two yards."  
  
Cheers erupted from the crowd as the craft lifted itself to the requested elevation.  
  
"You did it, Danziger!" Magus exclaimed.  
  
"Just don't get too excited," came the negative reply from the direction of the 'Rover.  
  
Yale continued, "Hoverscout, rise to the height of one hundred fifty yards and commence data acquisition."  
  
Without hesitation, the machine gradually rose upward toward the afternoon sun as it broke through the clouds. Many of the Advancers fumbled clumsily for sunglasses kept in their jackets, not wanting to veer their squinted gaze from the equipment as it became smaller and smaller in size. The machine finally reached the sanctioned height and began to successfully gather the geographical information of the area surrounding the valley.  
  
"How long do you think it'll take, Yale?" Walman asked, still not breaking eye contact with the distant object.  
  
"Not long at all. I would say that it should be just about finished."  
  
Suddenly, a blinding burst of light shot outward from the northwest hills. The Edenites screamed and frantically ran for cover. Most scurried to the supply tent located nearest to them while John grabbed Baines and Yale by the collars and tossed them under the 'Rover's large carriage. The Hoverscout exploded in a hail of sparks and began a crippled free-fall to the ground. Because of its minimal weight, its light shell was easily picked up by the moderate breeze and it disappeared into a dense grouping of trees close by.  
  
There were a few seconds of tense silence as the group peeked out from their hiding places looking for Terrians and the injured Hoverscout. When neither could be located in their field of view, Walman, Magus, Baines and Mazatl dashed toward the forest in search of the injured unit. The others followed more cautiously at a slower pace.  
  
By the time the second group reached the woods, the craft had already been detected in the thick, high branches of an oak tree. Baines had already been boosted up by Walman and was meticulously climbing the limbs in an attempt to recover their equipment.  
  
"Be careful," Bess worriedly called up to him. "The branches are still wet from the rain. You'll slip."  
  
"Baines, it's not safe. Let it go," Danziger advised as he reached the base of the tree.  
  
Baines halted mid-step and snapped in irritation, "What do you want me to do? Leave it up there? You heard what Yale said! It's already recorded everything we need!"  
  
Bess exchanged a cautious gaze with the mechanic. She could ascertain from Danziger's demeanor that something was very wrong. Moreover, her own inner voice told her the same thing.  
  
She attempted to diffuse the situation. "I think that John means that you shouldn't be risking your life for something that's probably too damaged to give us any answers." She continued in her most persuasive tone, "Now, why don't you climb down from there and we'll figure this out."  
  
Baines took a step downward and then thought otherwise. "No way! To hell with that!"  
  
"Listen to me!" Danziger implored. "You're gonna get yourself killed. You know that, don't you?"  
  
Baines continued to climb as he shouted in defiance, "I'm not coming down without the 'Scout!"  
  
John knew exactly how critical the situation was. His friend was definitely in danger, but from much more than the possibility of slipping on damp leaves. The burly mechanic firmly grabbed the lowest branch of the tree which was just within his grasp. He hoisted himself up with a grunt and deftly started maneuvering upward.  
  
"Don't do it, Baines!"  
  
"I can almost reach it," Baines triumphantly heralded down to the others. He was now almost at the very top. His legs were straddling a large limb as he inched himself outward away from the main trunk.  
  
"Please, stop!" Bess yelled fearfully.  
  
"No, he's almost got it," Magus countered, wanting Baines to continue his crusade. She couldn't understand why Bess and Danziger were acting this way. Maybe they've just given up hope, she concluded.  
  
The silver hull of the Hoverscout was only a few feet away embedded in a cluster of rust-colored leaves and smaller branches. Considering what it had been through, the craft looked to be in remarkably good shape.  
  
Baines stretched out his left hand and leaned forward as far as he could. "Just a little bit further," he muttered under his breath.  
  
Without warning, another blast of energy shot through the trees and the Hoverscout exploded into small pieces. Baines screamed in pain as the burning shrapnel pierced his dark skin. No longer able to maintain his balance, he tumbled toward the earth, his body brutally slamming into several branches as the ground came up to meet him. Danziger could only watch in horror as Baines sailed past him, his limp body now resembling that of a ragdoll as it bounced from limb to limb. The crewman landed harshly on his back, his broken legs extending outward in an unnatural posture, his clothes and skin still smoking from the cinders of the obliterated craft.  
  
The Edenites rushed toward their friend, but were halted by a Terrian who sprouted up from the ground directly next to him.  
  
Baines turned his dazed eyes to the creature. He coughed up a mouthful of blood and uttered, "I'm dead."  
  
As soon as the words left his lips, Baines' body stilled and his expression froze in place. Before the group knew what was happening, the Terrian crouched downward and placed a hand on the crewman's lifeless chest. Then together, they disappeared into the earth.  
  
"No!" they collectively cried as Walman ran to where his friend had laid only seconds before.  
  
"Why did they have to take his body?" Bess asked through her tears. Her mind began to race with images of the possible uses the Terrians could have for a corpse. Were they going to continue to study the Edenites even after they were all dead? She shivered at the thought of the creatures performing autopsies on their cadavers.  
  
Yale suggested, "Perhaps the Terrians don't want to leave any evidence behind."  
  
"Or maybe they're just cleaning up their mess," Danziger flatly noted as he descended the tree.  
  
__________  
  
That night, it was decided to temporarily forego the tradition of gathering around the evening campfire. Bess and Danziger assumed that it was because the group was too distraught over Baines' death and needed to spend some time alone to process the loss of their friend. However, unbeknownst to the two of them, that was not the reason.  
  
In truth, the others assembled together in the mess-tent and held a secret meeting without their knowledge. A very important choice was made by the six Edenites and there was no time to waste. Plus, there was packing to be done.  
  
__________ 


	5. 5/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 5  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
"John! Wake up! We have to stop them!" Bess cried while frantically shaking the sleeping mechanic.  
  
"Stop who? What happened?" he mumbled, still disoriented by the nightmares he suffered from ever since True's death.  
  
"I think they're launching the boat!"  
  
He popped open an eye to find the Earth-res hovering over his cot. "Huh?" He lazily sat up in bed. "What boat?"  
  
Bess hurled his coat toward him. "While you were working on the Hoverscout, the rest of them were building an escape boat."  
  
"Are they nuts? It'd be suicide!"  
  
John threw off the covers and grabbed his pants draped over the makeshift nightstand next to his bunk. He began to dress in a panic, shoving his feet into his boots and tossing his blue jacket on over his T- shirt. He charged out of his tent with Bess pulling up the rear.  
  
As they hurriedly entered the forest leading to the river, he questioned over his shoulder, "You knew about this?"  
  
"Yes," she answered guiltily. "It was something to keep everyone busy, but I thought it would only be used if the Hoverscout gave us promising results. I never imagined this." She shook her head as she caught up to his pace. "Especially after losing Baines yesterday."  
  
"No time to argue about this now. Let's just hope we're not too late."  
  
__________  
  
"Are you sure you don't want some company? It might get kind of lonely out there all alone," Magus purred as she slipped her arms around her companion.  
  
Walman warmly returned the gesture. "As much as I'd like to take you with me, someone needs to stay here and run things. Besides, there's not enough room for two people and supplies." He leaned in and whispered, "Gonna miss you though."  
  
Magus almost let the phrase 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' spill from her lips, but thought better of it. It seemed inappropriate considering how many 'absences' they'd suffered recently. "I'll miss you, too."  
  
They ambled over to a nearby clump of bushes to recover two oars which had been hidden from view. They returned to the water's edge and set them in the boat along with the food and equipment that Cameron had previously loaded. Yale was already there making one final maintenance check on the vessel. He felt a special responsibility for the success of this project. They had used his database for guidance and he had specifically chosen the outline for the boat's construction. In the end, the slender vessel most closely resembled a canoe. Although it provided only a limited amount of space, it sleek body enabled it to maneuver rougher waters. Yale also provided Walman with several vids and various reading materials to help him to learn how to operate the boat properly.  
  
As Mazatl and Cameron pushed the craft into a shallow section of the lake, Magus knew that it was time to say good-bye. After all, Bess or Danziger would wake up any minute and everyone knew that they would somehow put a halt to their efforts. She tightly grabbed both of Walman's hands and began to quietly sob. "I'm afraid. I don't want to lose you."  
  
He pulled her into a bear hug and reassured, "It's gonna be okay, Laura."  
  
Walman was much more nervous than he wanted to let on. After all, he was sailing into a virtual unknown. The Terrians had mentioned that there were several tribes who were sympathetic to Eden Advance's unique situation. If he could just get out of this mountain range, there was a good chance that he would encounter at least one of them on his journey. He could then ask the creatures for their help in freeing his friends. If that scenario didn't present itself, he would continue onward until he reached New Pacifica and alert the colonists on the Jamestown of their predicament.  
  
Either way, he knew that someone had to go for help and circumstances dictated that, as Eden Project's co-leader, it should be him. Besides, he didn't know how much longer he could stay trapped in the valley without going stir-crazy. Even with Magus to keep him company, this place was worse than the Biodome! He also harbored a certain sense of guilt over the loss of his good friend Baines as well as the others. Walman felt an intense need to get the survivors out of the mountains to safety and failure was simply not an option. Better things had to be on the horizon. They just had to be.  
  
He pulled back and gave her a large grin. "Tell you what? As soon as we get off of this rock, what do you say about us getting married?" He nodded in the tutor's direction. "We can have Yale officiate."  
  
Magus' mouth fell wide open for a few seconds. She finally threw her arms around him and happily answered, "Yes."  
  
He chuckled and held her securely. "All right. But until then, you take care of yourself." Walman loosened his grip and kissed her one more time before letting go. "I love you."  
  
"I love you, too, Greg."  
  
He climbed into the canoe and Mazatl and Cameron simultaneously shoved the vessel outward toward the river's mouth.  
  
"Don't forget to check in each hour until you're out of gear range," Yale reminded him as he waved good-bye.  
  
"Yep, and the beacon'll let you know where I am the rest of the way. See you in a few months when I bring back the cavalry."  
  
"Be careful." Magus expressed, her voice full of emotion.  
  
He winked at her. "You, too."  
  
Walman entered the river's main path and began his journey out of the mountain range. Although the current was even stronger than usual due to several days of rainfall, he skillfully used the oars to steer between the large rock formations scattered throughout the landscape. The other Edenites tracked alongside of the crewman from the shore, wanting to keep him in sight for as long as possible.  
  
Denner sprinted up ahead of the group and stopped at the edge of their imposed boundary to check for Terrians. She nervously inspected the scenery around her and was thrilled to find herself completely alone. She removed the telescanner from her bag and began a more detailed survey of her surroundings. Unfortunately, the water's route took a sharp turn just beyond the valley and her field of vision was completely obscured by large hills and towering trees.  
  
Suddenly, her senses were overpowered by a loud whooshing noise. Just beyond the perimeter, a major section of the water's current had changed. Instead of flowing westward, it had begun to spiral into an entity resembling a huge drain. Its ever-widening circle pulled loose branches and other floating debris into its trap and vanished without a trace. She hurriedly activated her gear to warn Walman and the others, but her voice was drowned out by deafening sounds of the churning water. Only when she turned her eyepiece toward the river did the others become aware of the danger that lay ahead.  
  
"Get out of there, Greg! Swim for it!" Magus frantically called.  
  
The crewman began to furiously paddle backward, but the current was too strong and his boat continued to pick up speed. "I can't! I'll drown!"  
  
Yale was startled by Walman's response. These past weeks, the cyborg had allowed himself to be caught up in the frenzy of planning to use the river as a means of escape. He and the others had become positively consumed by it. Only now did he realize that, in his haste to build the vessel and teach navigation techniques, he'd never even thought to ask Walman if he knew how to swim.  
  
"Jump, Greg! I'm coming for you!"  
  
Before anyone could grab her, Magus dove into the frigid waters. In spite of the fact that she could swim, she was quickly overtaken by the river's tempestuous flow. Her arms flapped wildly and she struggled for air between submergings as the current viciously tossed her about. She could hear Walman and the others screaming her name as she bobbed up and down. Realizing that she wouldn't be able to reach her companion, she tried in vain to turn back toward the shore. However, she was being thrashed around so harshly that she could no longer tell which direction her friends were.  
  
She never even saw the grouping of sharp rocks ahead of her until the moment before her head struck a large boulder, crushing her skull. Her body went limp as blood poured from her open scalp and she floated face- down toward the valley's edge.  
  
"Laura!" Walman cried in horror.  
  
Forgetting his own predicament and refusing to believe that Magus was already dead, he plunged into the rapids to rescue her. But it was an impossible situation. Not only was Magus beyond saving, it was too late for Walman. He valiantly tried to stay above water, but he knew it was a losing battle. The current carried both crewmen past the valley's perimeter and into the swirling waters just beyond. Amidst the anguished cries of the Edenites, both were pulled down into the drain-like abyss and vanished. After the supply filled canoe met the identical fate, the spiraling flow of water ceased and the river returned to its normal course.  
  
Bess and John caught up to the group just as the boat was absorbed by the raging waters. Immediately noticing that two of their friends were missing, it wasn't too difficult to figure out what had transpired. Cameron was trying to subdue a hysterical Denner while Yale and Mazatl stood there in shock at the water's edge. Bess brought her hand to her mouth and muttered something unintelligible while Danziger silently surveyed the scene. Only then, did they notice that two Terrians had sprouted upward on the other side of the river bank, apparently witnessing the entire incident.  
  
Mazatl was enraged by the sight of the creatures and angrily pulled a pistol from the inside pocket of his coat. The weapon, formerly owned by Commander O'Neill, had been his constant companion for the past two and a half months. He hadn't been given the chance to use it when Baines had died the prior day. Things had happened too fast. But today was different and Mazatl was eager to learn if taking revenge against the Terrians would be as sweet as he had pictured it so many times in his mind. The crewman closed one eye and extended his hand to line up the shot. Taking aim at one of the being's chest, Mazatl began to squeeze the trigger.  
  
"No, don't!" Bess implored, throwing herself directly in front of the gun's path.  
  
Mazatl relaxed his finger before the weapon could release. "Get out of the way, Bess!"  
  
He attempted to move around her, but the Earth-res shadowed him to keep him from firing. Danziger jumped in between Bess and the weapon and furiously grabbed hold of Mazatl's wrist, pushing it and the gun into the air.  
  
"What the hell are you doing?" the mechanic shouted at the top of his lungs. With his other hand, he reached up and snatched the weapon from Mazatl and roughly shoved the crewman to the ground.  
  
He towered over him and bellowed, "You wanna justify to the Diggers that we're the barbarians that they think we are? You wanna get yourself killed, too?"  
  
Mazatl hollered back as the creatures sank back into the ground, "They're the barbarians! They've already murdered nine of us!"  
  
"I'm not disagreeing with you. But shooting at them or trying to escape won't do anything except increase the size of the cemetery!"  
  
Danziger's face became redder by the moment as he began ferociously pacing back and forth in front of the remaining five Edenites. His eyes were fierce and his nostrils flared wildly. The group was becoming a bit nervous by his unusual outburst... especially since he was still holding the pistol.  
  
"Jesus Christ, I don't believe this! Have you all completely lost your minds? How many people have to die before you see the big picture?"  
  
He seemed to suddenly remember that he had the gun in his hand. In utter disgust, he hurled it as hard as he could into the forest.  
  
Waving his arms, John roared, "The Terrians said that they're studying us! Don't you get it? They've been watching our every move! They know exactly what we're doing! Just because we don't see them doesn't mean that they aren't here. They're in those rocks over there! They're behind that tree! They're under your feet right now! And they can take us away any time they want! Didn't you see what happened to Baines? To Zero? Didn't you see what they did to Dev-"  
  
He abruptly halted mid-sentence and staggered backward, his gaze falling downward. His face was covered by his fallen curls and Bess worried that John might actually collapse to the ground. She was about to approach him when the mechanic returned his attention to the group. His face now bore a blank expression, his eyes and voice were drained of all emotion as he stonily drove the point home.  
  
"The Diggers aren't going to let us contact anyone else. Even if, by some miracle, we were able to send a distress signal, they'll keep everyone away. There's not gonna be a rescue, either by the colony ship or by another tribe of Terrians. And they will never allow any of us to escape. Am I making myself clear?"  
  
After seeing the effect his daunting words had on the crew, Danziger turned and made a beeline back to camp.  
  
As he trudged through the woods, Cameron finally found his voice and called out to him, "Then what are we supposed to do?"  
  
Not turning around, John yelled back in a hardened tone, "Survive."  
  
__________  
  
Making headstones is hard work. Danziger had searched out and hauled back to camp three large rocks and was busy readying them for implantation into the ground. He'd spent all afternoon chiseling them into the appropriate size and shape and now it was down to carving in the names of the dead. He had completed William Baines and Laura Magus and was now concentrating on Walman's inscription.  
  
Because he hadn't assisted in the construction of the first six markers, he was having trouble making the lettering look the same. Should the stem for the letter 'Y' for 'GREGORY' be straight downward or curved? He racked his brain as to how Baines had etched the original letters. John would do anything to avoid having to actually go to the cemetery to confirm how the name 'ULYSSES' had been engraved.  
  
He took a break to inspect his sore hands by the flickering light of the campfire. Even though there was a chill in the night air, Danziger was perspiring and wiped the dirt and sweat from his brow with the sleeve of his shirt.  
  
He had worked all day in solitude while the others kept away, either by remaining in the nearby woods or retreating to their tents. Danziger didn't really want their help nor did he want to have to engage in conversation, polite or otherwise. He had a job and he wanted to get it done, even if it took him all night. Besides, he didn't want to think about how quiet it would be if he stopped his chiseling. About the fact that graveyard markers now outnumbered survivors. About the guilt and sadness that he feared would swallow him whole if he let it in. He didn't want to think at all. Instead, it was better to focus on keeping the remaining members of Eden Advance alive. Nothing else mattered to him anymore.  
  
Something caught the corner of his eye and John realized that he had company.  
  
"Hi," his visitor hesitantly greeted as she joined him.  
  
"Bess," he muttered in a distant voice, still gazing straight ahead at the blaze.  
  
She pulled her coat closed and stretched out her hands to allow the flames to warm them. After fidgeting awkwardly, she softly commented, "You know, I think the others are afraid to come out here."  
  
His silence was response enough to let her know that maybe the group's fears were valid. Although they liked and trusted him, Danziger's eclectic behavior had certainly made the other Edenites a bit uneasy. When it came down to it, no one was really sure of John's true state of mind these days. However, Bess was never one to be easily frightened. Besides, she couldn't exactly throw any stones his way. Keeping her own emotions in check and working through her grief was a daily battle that sometimes came close to defeating her. These last few months had changed her, too.  
  
Bess hoped that her deception regarding the boat escape hadn't destroyed her friendship with the mechanic. "Are you angry with me?"  
  
John sighed heavily and shook his head. "I'm angry, but not at you." He paused a moment before continuing, "What happened today was my fault. Same with Baines, yesterday."  
  
The widow jerked her head back in puzzlement. "That's ridiculous. You're not to blame for any of this."  
  
John abruptly stood and walked away as if he hadn't heard her. She followed him to an area behind the supply tent where Danziger had set up a temporary workshop to construct the gravestones. He was already busying himself by filing down a few sharp edges on Magus' marker when Bess arrived. She sat on a discarded crate and waited for him to respond to her, but he never veered his concentration from his task.  
  
"Can I ask you a question? If you knew that we weren't going to be able to escape, why did you work so hard to repair the Hoverscout?"  
  
John stopped his sanding, but didn't look upward. He woodenly replied, "The Diggers aren't gonna let us leave, that I was always sure of. I figured that they would've taken plenty of precautions to make sure the valley was impassable. I thought that the information that the 'Scout gave us would finally show everyone that we're gonna be here permanently."  
  
He shook his head. "My theory was wrong. I realized that when the Diggers shot the 'Scout out of the sky. For whatever reason, they don't want us to see what's outside of these mountains. Maybe there really is a pass out of here and they don't want us to find it. We'll probably never know. I just wish I could've stopped Baines in time." When he finished speaking, he immediately began working again.  
  
Bess was grappling with her own guilt and quietly expressed, "I'm sorry about my part in Walman and Magus' deaths."  
  
"Wasn't your fault. You must've known all along that an escape by boat wouldn't have worked. Why else would they not include you in this morning's sendoff?" he said as he tossed the instrument aside. With a small grunt, he lifted the smooth rock and gently laid the finished product against Baines' completed marker. "Trust me, your hands are clean."  
  
"I thought we were just being prepared. If the data showed that the river was safe for travel, I knew that there would be a limited window of time to leave before the cold weather set in. I would never have gone along with it if I thought that they were going to blindly launch without knowing what's ahead."  
  
She added as she toyed with a few blades of browning grass, "And, for what it's worth, I wanted to tell you about it. But the others convinced me that you would be against it."  
  
"They were right. I would've tried to stop you."  
  
"Well, I'm sorry all the same," Bess remarked ashamedly.  
  
He kneeled down a few feet from her and started gathering his tools together. "Don't be. What's done is done. But I'm glad you're here because I need to talk to you."  
  
He paused and met her gaze for the first time. "Tomorrow morning, I'm calling a meeting to tell them that we're taking control of the group."  
  
The Earth-res wasn't sure if she'd heard him correctly. "'We'?"  
  
"Yeah, you and I. Winter's comin' up on us fast. Much quicker than last year. In fact, I'll bet that we've relocated to the cave by the end of the month. There's a lot of work to be done and I sure as hell can't do it alone. We're gonna have to hustle our asses to be ready."  
  
His voice showed a hint of emotion as he related their course of action. It was clear to her that he'd given this a lot of thought. "You did a great job getting our food reserves up. I need you to help me with organizing the rest of our inventory- supplies, vehicles, everything that isn't nailed down. Some of it can be moved to the smaller cavern. Some stuff we'll have to leave out here in the open because there's no room. We also need to get the larger cave ready to serve as our living quarters for at least the next three months. Are you up to it?"  
  
Bess nodded in agreement as Danziger rose to his feet and walked over to her still seated form. His tone was low and he wore a serious expression.  
  
"I also want you to promise me something." He placed his hands on his hips and leaned down to keep eye contact. "No more secrets, do you hear me? I know that you meant well by not telling me about what the others were doing. It also shows me how little attention I've been paying to what's goin' on around here. Anyway, if we're gonna make this work, I need to be able to trust you. Understand?"  
  
"Yes, I understand and I promise," she answered with conviction.  
  
John seemed satisfied and straightened up to his full height. "Okay. We'll work out the details tomorrow."  
  
He grabbed his toolbox and carried it toward the front of the supply tent. Correctly sensing that their conversation was over, Bess shuffled to her feet and began to make her way back to her quarters. She halted as John peeked his head around the canvas.  
  
"Oh, and one more thing," he added in a cautious voice. "For God's sake, don't ever step in front of a loaded gun like you did today. We've already lost enough people."  
  
She almost reminded him that he'd stepped in front of the weapon, too, but reconsidered. She knew that both of them had put themselves in danger in an effort to stop the possibility of additional bloodshed. It was the correct choice to make, even if it had ended up costing them their lives.  
  
Instead, she answered, "Deal."  
  
"See you in the morning," Danziger uttered as he disappeared into the tent.  
  
Bess wandered back to her shelter, deep in thought about the most recent deaths of her friends and her new responsibilities as co-leader of the remaining colonists.  
  
__________  
  
  
  
It was the one year anniversary of Eden Advance crash-landing on the planet. It was also the day that Mazatl died. It was the early morning hours when we heard the shot. By the time John got to his tent, there was nothing left but the gun and a mound of displaced dirt with blood still around the edges.  
  
I feel so guilty. All of the signs were there and we should have known that he was capable of this type of behavior. He was so angry all of the time; that pistol never left his side. He'd searched half the day to retrieve it after John had thrown it into the woods.  
  
He'd certainly been depressed. Truth be told, I don't think Mazatl had been the same since Eben's death. Those first few months planetside, I remember him watching her whenever she looked in the other direction. He'd schedule himself on her meal duty shift just to be near her. I even teased him about it once, but he never gave any indication of how deep his feelings ran. I don't think Eben ever suspected that he had fallen in love with her. And then, before we knew it, she was gone in the blink of an eye. I guess when he added Eben's loss with everything else that we'd been through, it was just too much for him. He decided that it was time to give up.  
  
I still pray for his soul every day and hope that God will forgive him for his sin. I hope that He understands that Mazatl wasn't really thinking clearly anymore. May God have mercy on him... and on those who are left behind.  
  
- Bess Martin Journal Chronicles, Archive File, Entry Date- Year 2 (Day 694)  
  
__________  
  
There was no opposition to Bess and Danziger taking over leadership duties and the two threw themselves into the task of readying themselves for the coming winter. Bess concentrated on making the cave habitable and moving in their essentials. John headed the effort of protecting the rest of their equipment and vehicles from the elements. He used the smaller cave to store as much as possible. However, none of the vehicles would fit and it was necessary to build a crude wooden garage to house them. There was an infinite sadness when the Edenites packed up several of the tents including the med-quarters and the units of those no longer with them for the final time. They stored the personal belongings of their deceased friends in the 'Rover's inner compartments where True's were kept.  
  
Although Bess and John became completely absorbed in their quest to survive the season, it became very noticeable that the other three colonists seemed to lack the initiative to make suggestions or undertake any chores on their own. Maybe it was because their confidence was destroyed by the botched escape attempt that cost Magus and Walman their lives. Perhaps it was Mazatl's suicide. At any rate, Bess was concerned that they were beginning to give up hope. She and John spoke about this privately and it was decided to try to keep the group as busy as possible. After all, they assessed, having a project to concentrate their efforts on was often what had gotten them through the long, painful days. Even now, they seemed to be practicing what they were preaching by working nonstop.  
  
As Danziger had predicted, the Advancers were forced to retreat to the cave as the month drew to a close. An intense cold front had moved in and the chill in the air extended into their new dwelling. Due to the chamber's lack of ventilation, they were unable to enjoy the heat of a campfire. Instead, they sought refuge under piles of thermo-blankets to stay warm. A small pit outside of the cavern's entrance was used for all of the cooking. Bess had done an amazing job of turning the dreary setting into something suitable for their occupation. The cave floor had been cleaned of all debris and she'd had John and Cameron remove several medium sized rocks to create as much room as possible. She had lined the dark shaft leading into the cave with lumacones and there were also lumalanterns adorning several key areas of the chamber that allowed them to reflect the most light.  
  
Space was cramped, though, and the cavern was crammed with canned foods, a generator, basic medical equipment and other needed materials. Plus, five people also had to live there. Bess attached linens to a rod to divide much of the single room into four smaller nooks to serve as personal quarters. Each individual cubicle barely had enough room for a cot and a crate to stack their belongings on, but it would have to do. She gave Cameron and Denner a slightly larger space because they were sharing and she moved them behind a wall of supplies to give them as much privacy as possible.  
  
A heavy snowstorm rolled in from the northern hills less than a week later. It lasted for days and the Edenites found themselves almost completely trapped in their surroundings. It was only then that they encountered a new, cruel foe within their midst. It wasn't hunger. Bess had made sure that there was plenty of food to last several months. It wasn't the Terrians. They kept their distance as long as the group played by the rules. Actually, it was something that they had struggled with during their first winter, but it had never been this severe. The enemy was boredom and it was to have a devastating consequence on the survivors.  
  
There was nothing to do. Nothing to do but sit and think about what they'd endured; about what they were still living through and the realization that this would be their existence for the rest of their miserable lives. Their dream, whether it was escaping on the colony ship or living long, happy lives on the sandy shores of New Pacifica, was gone. The Jamestown would arrive with no one to greet them. The Syndrome children would succumb to their illness after the Terrians refused to heal them. The children's families were probably in danger, too. What if the Terrians continued their wrath and decided to exact revenge on them as well? And there was no way to warn them. No way for the members of Eden Advance to escape their prison. Their friends and family were already dead. Some of them had died violently right in front of them. And there was nothing that could be done. Nothing to do, but wait until they died, too.  
  
It was these foreboding thoughts that occupied and started eating away at the minds of several of the Edenites. Yale stayed in his unit all day long with the curtain drawn. Cameron and Denner hardly spoke and also rarely ventured from their small quarters.  
  
However, Bess refused to give in to the negativity and kept herself busy with a variety of activities. She ended up doing all of the cooking when no one else volunteered except John, whose own culinary talents were dismal, if not almost lethal. She also continued to try to familiarize herself Julia's Diaglove and other equipment.  
  
Danziger kept himself occupied by working on plans for the coming spring. He tried to involve the others and get their input on things such as building permanent homes and growing crops, but it only seemed to increase their depression. If the weather permitted, the mechanic would venture out to check on the status of the supplies in the smaller cavern and the housed vehicles. He made sure not to stray too far or stay out for too long. Bess would kill him if he ended up wasting precious medical supplies just because he didn't have enough sense to come out of the cold.  
  
It was ironic that the two people who had lost the most ended up taking care of the needs of the remaining colonists. However, the other three didn't seem to notice or care. They were too busy wallowing in their own self-pity. This self-defeatist attitude systematically wore them down and left them exposed to an even more sinister and deadly enemy.  
  
It started with a cough. Denner was the first to show signs of the infection as her lungs became increasingly congested and she complained of a headache that wouldn't go away. It wasn't long before she was suffering from a high fever accompanied by chills. Soon after, Cameron was also at the beginning stages of the sickness. Bess was still learning how to use the medical equipment and had no idea how to treat the virus. She could only administer mild pain blocks to ease their discomfort and she also tried to slow the illness' progression by administering vitamin injections. She, Yale and Danziger scoured the medical logs to find a treatment for the pneumonia-like symptoms, but nothing worked.  
  
Cameron steadfastly remained at Denner's bedside. He held her hand and made sure there was always a cool cloth on her forehead to try to reduce her high temperature. Even though it was unlikely that she could hear him, Cameron begged her not to give up and to continue to fight the illness that was ravaging her body. When he became too sick to sit on his own, his cot was placed next to hers so they could be with each other.  
  
It only took four days for the illness to take Denner's life. A Terrian came to claim the body as Cameron openly wept next to her limp form. The crewman was inconsolable after losing the second woman that he had loved. The remaining Edenites did the best that they could to comfort him, but his health spiraled downward quickly. Two mornings later, they awoke to find him gone, too.  
  
Now, there were only three members of Eden Advance left and Bess was determined to make sure that no one else was lost. Thankfully, she was not suffering from the effects of the virus. John claimed that he also felt fine although Bess noticed that he did look a bit peaked.  
  
Yale was another story altogether.  
  
"Just hang in there, Buddy. You're gonna get through this, all right?" Danziger soothed, trying to keep his tone as light as possible. He and Bess were keeping a vigil at his bedside as the tutor gradually worsened.  
  
"I'm so cold. Why is it so cold?" Yale murmured as beads of sweat trickled down his face.  
  
John wiped the perspiration from the cyborg's brow and tucked in his blankets. "Probably because it's about minus ten degrees outside. Would you like some hot soup? Bess just made some."  
  
"I don't think I could keep it down," he responded. The high fever was taking its toll on him and they could barely understand his garbled words. Bess grabbed a small bowl of broth and brought the spoon to his lips.  
  
"Why don't you try just a little bit, okay?"  
  
Yale mumbled something incoherently and his eyes began to flicker. Seeing that he was drifting into unconsciousness, Danziger reasoned, "Maybe we should try again later."  
  
Bess nodded in agreement and they both began to rise to their feet. Without warning, Yale's hand shot outward and firmly grabbed the surprised mechanic by the forearm and yanked him back to the seated position.  
  
The tutor's eyes were wide open and he was clearly in a delusional state as he proclaimed, "She loves you, you know that, don't you? She may fight it and try to push you away, but I can see it in her eyes. I've known that stubborn nature of hers since she was four years old. Devon loves you, John. Please don't give up on her! You could be very happy together. I'm sure of it!"  
  
Danziger's head shot backward and he looked as though the air had been knocked out of him.  
  
Before he was able to mask it, he face displayed a look of unadulterated pain and sorrow. For a few moments, he could only stare at the cyborg is total disbelief.  
  
Eventually, John was able to release the breath that he had been involuntarily holding and his expression hardened back to the stony demeanor that he usually displayed. He reached forward and patted Yale on the shoulder with a slightly shaky hand.  
  
"You get some rest, okay? I'll check on you a little later."  
  
The tutor shut his eyes and was asleep almost instantaneously. Bess looked to John to see how much damage Yale's outburst had caused. Although he outwardly showed no emotion, the mechanic's breathing was shallow and he looked like he was struggling to keep himself under control.  
  
"John, are you-"  
  
He held up his hand to stop her. Whatever Bess was going to say, he didn't want to hear it.  
  
"I-I need to get some air," he whispered.  
  
He stumbled to his feet and hurried out of the main room before she could respond. Danziger could feel a burning sensation rising in his throat and barely made it out of the cave before losing the contents of his stomach. His head was spinning as he clumsily fell to his knees in the snow.  
  
He hadn't been prepared to hear her name; to be reminded of Devon and the fact that she was forever lost to him. His beautiful daughter. She was gone, too. How could this have happened?  
  
No, he rationalized, it was best not to think about it. Remembering them hurt too much. He had to clear his mind of those memories. Nothing mattered except keeping Bess and Yale alive. He had to take care of them and make sure they were safe. He repeated it over and over to himself. Nothing else matters. Bess and Yale have to live. Somebody has to survive this nightmare.  
  
  
  
John had no idea how long he'd been out there in the frigid temperature. He heard something move and looked up to see Bess standing in front of him with an extremely worried look on her face. He barely noticed that the sky was now dark as she helped him to his feet with great difficulty. Several inches of snow had fallen around him and the mechanic was almost completely covered as well. She practically had to hold him up as she guided him back to the cavern. She was speaking to him, but he was having trouble hearing her over the loud pounding in his head. He could only blankly stare at her in confusion as she removed his wet outer clothing.  
  
Bess carefully stretched him out on his bunk and wrapped him in several blankets to warm him. She brushed the damp curls from his eyes and said something else to him before walking away, but he didn't know what. Perhaps he should get some sleep, was the only thing Danziger's clouded mind could comprehend. He was having real trouble concentrating. In fact, he wasn't feeling too well at all.  
  
  
  
The following day, Bess was still cursing herself as she rested her head in her hands on the edge of John's bed. How could she have let him leave the cave in such a distraught condition? How could she not have noticed that he wasn't wearing his heavy winter coat? She should have at least tried to stop him, even though he probably wouldn't have listened to her. Still, she should not have left him alone for so long.  
  
She had planned to check on him, but had accidentally fallen asleep. When she'd finally awakened, she was alarmed to see that it was nightfall and John hadn't returned. When she found him outside, he was just sitting there motionless in the snow. Bess thought that he had frozen to death. She was relieved when he'd lifted his head to meet her gaze, but frightened by his fragile appearance.  
  
Now, as she studied Danziger at his bedside, it was painfully obvious that he was exhibiting the same symptoms as the others. During the night, he had developed a high fever and his breathing was becoming more and more labored. Bess tried to communicate with him, but he was no longer cognizant of his surroundings. Occasionally, he would toss and turn in his bunk, evidently in the grips of a fever-induced nightmare. Several times, she'd heard him murmur True's name. It was the first time she'd heard John speak of his daughter since her eleventh birthday at the cemetery four months before.  
  
It rattled her to see the burly man in such a frail state. She had become closer to Danziger than any of the other Edenites since their imprisonment by the Terrians. Although the doors remained closed regarding his own feelings of grief, the mechanic had always made time for Bess whenever she'd needed to talk about the loss of her husband. He would sit with her for hours while she cried or vented her pain and frustration. Sometimes she would just feel the need to relay stories of her life with Morgan. Their first date, their first wedding, living as the wife of the government's 'Deputy Secretary In Charge Of Interstellar Development'- anything that came to her mind. And to his credit, John never reacted negatively or brought up any of the bureaucrat's less favorable attributes. Since they had become co-leaders of Eden Advance, they had developed even more of a camaraderie and had come to rely on each other. In short, John had become her best friend. And now she was going to lose him, too.  
  
Bess practically jumped out of her skin as a powerful rumbling noise erupted behind her. A Terrian had burst from the ground and was positioned next to Yale's bed. She staggered to her feet in astonishment.  
  
Yale was awake and noticed her horrified expression as she nervously edged away from Danziger's cot toward his. "No, Bess, it is okay. I called him."  
  
Not averting her eyes that were deadlocked on the creature, she stuttered, "What are you talking about? Why would you call the Terrians?" In her mind, she also wondered how Yale could have contacted the beings. Almost all of the Edenites had attempted to access the Dreamplane these last few months to plead their case without success. How was the tutor able to get hold of them now?  
  
"I told them that I was ready."  
  
She turned to him in shock. "Ready for what?" She was fearful that she already knew the grave answer to her question.  
  
He spoke simply as he grabbed for her hand, "I let them know that it was time to come for me. That I am ready to die."  
  
"Yale, please," she implored. "You can't just give up."  
  
"I am tired, Bess. I cannot stay here any longer." The cyborg brought her captured hand to his lips and gently kissed it good-bye. He wore a small smile as he weakly declared, "It is all right. I am not afraid."  
  
"Yale-" Bess cried as his body relaxed and his cybernetic hand slipped from her grasp.  
  
She leaned over and softly kissed his cheek, several of her tears falling onto his face in the process.  
  
"Good-bye, Yale," she whispered.  
  
She said a small prayer as she stood and backed away from the cot. She respected his wishes and surrendered him to the awaiting Terrian.  
  
__________ 


	6. 6/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 6  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
And then there were two.  
  
Bess had no time to grieve for Yale or the others. All of her efforts, both physical and emotional, were focused on keeping Danziger alive. She knelt at his bedside and prayed, sometimes in silence and sometimes out loud. She promised God anything if He would spare his life. Although she was absolutely terrified of losing her friend, she was just as afraid that, if John died, there would be no one to talk to or take care of. There would be no one to need her. Bess would be completely and utterly alone... and nothing frightened her more than that.  
  
She spent the next few days at Danziger's side. He wasn't able to eat so Bess pumped him full of vitamin and nutritional supplements to compensate. He never regained complete consciousness after the first night he was taken ill. He opened his eyes a few times, but Bess doubted that he knew that she was even there. He still periodically muttered his daughter's name and once Bess could have sworn that he said the name Elle. Other than that, he would only moan in pain as violent coughing spasms racked his body.  
  
After another exhausting night of trying to decrease John's soaring temperature, Bess fell asleep with her head and arms sprawled across the blankets on the mechanic's cot. She stirred and shook herself awake when she sensed that something was definitely amiss. She lifted her head to see that Danziger was no longer trembling from chills. In fact, he looked rather peaceful for the first time in days.  
  
Perhaps the fever has finally broken and he'll be all right, she encouragingly deduced. Or, she thought as fear overtook her optimism, it could be a sign that he'd taken a turn for the worse. As a Terrian sprung from the ground behind them, she realized in horror that it was the latter.  
  
She stayed in between her friend and the creature in an attempt to block him from performing his task. She shook the mechanic by the shoulders.  
  
"John? John? Can you hear me?"  
  
When she got no response, Bess tried to rouse him by heartily slapping him across the face. He didn't even twitch.  
  
"Stay with me, John. Come on, give me a sign that you're in there somewhere."  
  
Now panic-stricken, she grabbed his hand in both of hers, basically trying to will him to live. She barked at him with the fortitude and tenacity of a drill sergeant, "John Danziger, you listen to me and you listen to me good! I need you to wake up! Squeeze my hand and let me know that you can hear me!"  
  
She felt nothing except the shiver down her spine as the Terrian trilled behind her. She turned her head and watched as the creature stepped forward and was now positioned directly next to Danziger's bunk.  
  
In a final effort to delay the inevitable, she threw herself over John's chest.  
  
"No! You can't take him! I won't let you!" she challenged as tears began to pour out of her.  
  
She stared at Danziger's inert form and begged in an agonized voice, "John! Please don't die! I can't do this alone! I'll never make it by myself! I'll go crazy! Please don't go! Please!"  
  
Bess was now sobbing so profusely that she was beginning to hyperventilate. She fell forward and buried her face in his shoulder.  
  
"Please don't take him away!" Bess stuttered between clipped breaths. "I don't want to be alone! Please! Please, John, don't die!"  
  
_____  
  
Danziger was feeling pretty damn good. His headache was gone and he was finally warming up a bit. Guess I beat this flux bug after all, he satisfactorily concluded as he opened his eyes and sprang to his feet.  
  
It was then that he first noticed that things were slightly awry. Well, more than slightly. He turned to see himself, or someone who looked a whole helluva lot like him, lying stationary in his cot. Not only that, Bess was draped over his chest and she was imploring him to wake up. He then noticed the Terrian standing next to him, also witnessing the proceedings.  
  
"What's goin' on?" John asked, directing his question to both Bess and the Terrian. Only the Terrian seemed to hear him.  
  
Your time here is over. You will now come with me.  
  
Now Danziger was completely confused. But he couldn't help but be fascinated by the scene playing out in front of him. Why wouldn't Bess answer him, he wondered.  
  
"Where?"  
  
To join the others who have gone before you.  
  
John's head snapped upward to look at the creature in shock. "Are you telling me that I'm dead?"  
  
The concept of death is another belief that separates our species from yours. We have learned from other human specimens that many believe death to be a final destination. This is an untrue statement. You will now follow me for your time on this plane of existence is complete.  
  
Danziger had to take a few seconds to absorb the Terrian's explanation. He'd never really believed in Heaven or the idea of another spiritual existence after the death of the physical body. He remembered Alex and Les talking about being each other's guardian angels, but he'd never really bought into it. At the time, both knew they were dying and needed something to believe in, no matter how illogical it seemed to John.  
  
But what if Alex and Les were right? What if there was a place to go to be reunited with dead friends and family members? The Terrian said that he would take him to rejoin the others. That meant he would be with True, again. And he missed his little girl so very much.  
  
Danziger's gaze returned to the Earth-res and he listened to her frightened pleas not to leave her alone. He glanced over to Yale's empty cot and saw the patch of displaced earth next to it. It was only then that he realized that the tutor had died.  
  
"What about Bess?" he asked in quiet concern. "Will she be okay?"  
  
Her future has yet to be determined. Our examination of humanity's viability with the Mother will continue until the last of your group has left.  
  
Seeing Bess' terrified expression and hearing her anguished cries, John knew what had to be done. No matter how much he missed his daughter and friends, he'd made a promise to himself to do everything that he could to keep the remaining Edenites safe. Although it saddened him, it was an easy decision to make.  
  
"Then I'm not going. I'm staying with Bess."  
  
The creature cocked his head sideways in confusion. Your time here is finished. You will come with me.  
  
"No, I won't go. For now, my place is here," John related. He dolefully added, "Please tell True that I love her, though." He silently prayed for his little girl to forgive him and that he hoped to see her soon, wherever she was now.  
  
The Terrian trilled angrily and continued to try to persuade Danziger to leave of his own volition. However, he steadfastly refused to budge on the issue.  
  
As the creature sank back into the ground by himself, John suddenly experienced overpowering waves of dizziness. He became so disoriented that he barely felt himself falling forward into the cot where his other form lay.  
  
_____  
  
Bess decided that, if the Terrian wanted to take her friend away, he was going to have to physically remove her from his body to do so. She held onto Danziger tightly and prepared herself for a fight. All the while, she wept and continued to beseech John to show some sign of life. Her crying became so emphatic that she drowned out the sounds of the Terrian's return to the earth.  
  
Her prayers were finally answered as Danziger stirred and let out a weak cough.  
  
"John? Oh, thank God!" Bess exclaimed as her tears of dread turned to relief. "I don't believe it. You're alive!"  
  
John felt like hell. It took almost all of his energy to open his eyes for a moment to view a very surprised Bess.  
  
"Barely," he managed to croak out.  
  
The widow whipped around to notice that the creature was gone. She quickly grabbed a cup of water next to Danziger's bed and held it to his cracked lips, but his throat was too swollen to swallow more than a small sip.  
  
"A Terrian came for you," she said through her sniffles.  
  
John mustered his strength to answer her and could only manage a few syllables at a time. "Uh-huh," he mumbled. "Wouldn't go with him."  
  
"Are you saying that you knew the Terrian was here for you and you refused to leave with him?"  
  
"Yeah." He let out a small snort and Bess could hear the vibration of the fluid in his lungs. "He wasn't too happy about it either."  
  
Bess couldn't believe her ears. She certainly hadn't witnessed any interaction between John and the creature. Perhaps when Danziger's condition worsened to the point of death, it opened some kind of porthole to the Dreamscape. The same porthole that Yale had accessed to call the Terrian to retrieve him. Or maybe the Terrian was the one to initiate contact. Either way, it amazed her that Danziger had been too stubborn to die. Apparently, the man's bullheaded disposition was applicable to all life forms and not just limited to humans. She could only imagine what the argument must have been like between the two beings. For a moment, she almost felt sorry for the Terrian.  
  
"Why didn't you go?" she queried.  
  
John was too exhausted to continue the conversation. He shut his eyes and weakly recounted, "Couldn't do it." As he slipped back into a deep sleep, he faintly muttered, "You'd be alone."  
  
Bess' eyes became as wide as dinner plates at the revelation. "You stayed so I wouldn't be left by myself?"  
  
He could only respond with the shallow rise and fall of his chest. However, the answer was clear. Being a devout Catholic, Bess believed that, after the physical body is discarded at death, the soul survives and goes to Heaven. There, one exists in a paradise and obtains spiritual peace and tranquility for all eternity. It sounded to her like John had been given the opportunity to travel to Heaven and leave this awful existence. Instead, he'd made the conscious choice to return to a life of hardship, illness and loss. He had forfeited eternal happiness so she wouldn't be alone.  
  
Despite the guilt that Bess felt over this realization, it was overshadowed by her joy at having her friend back and the knowledge that she wouldn't have to face the uncertain future by herself.  
  
__________  
  
Danziger's fever finally broke later that evening and his health slowly improved. Although he still suffered from coughing spasms, his chills had subsided and, as far as Bess could tell, he no longer seemed haunted by nightmares. However, the road to recovery was a slow one and the mechanic remained unconscious for several more days.  
  
Bess had seated herself next to his cot and was in the middle of mending a pair of pants when John opened his eyes.  
  
"Hey, Bess."  
  
She excitedly moved to sit on the edge of his bed, dropping the article of clothing to the floor in the process. She felt his forehead and was gratified that it was cool to the touch.  
  
"Hey, Danziger."  
  
John feebly reached up to scratch his cheek and was surprised to feel a full growth of beard.  
  
"How long have I been out?" he asked in a hoarse voice.  
  
"A week, more or less. It's been three days since the Terrian came for you."  
  
His brows furrowed in befuddlement. "Huh? What Terrian?"  
  
She offered him a cup of water and was pleased that he was able to drink a few small gulps.  
  
"You don't remember arguing with him?"  
  
"Uh-uh. Don't remember a thing." His eyes became wide with worry. "Oh, Christ, I didn't do anything stupid like punch him the nose, did I?"  
  
Bess chuckled for the first time in weeks. She also wondered for the first time if Terrians had noses. "No, but you said that you made him angry. He left without you."  
  
"I gathered that part," Danziger answered with a slight amount sarcasm in his voice. "Don't remember any of it." He took another sip of water before asking, "How's Yale doing?"  
  
Her face suddenly fell as she shook her head and looked downward.  
  
John exhaled deeply which turned into a coughing spell. Once it subsided and he was able to catch his breath, he whispered, "I knew he wasn't doin' so well, but I kept hoping he'd pull through."  
  
Bess replaced the blankets over him that had been dislodged by his outburst. "Me, too." Her eyes glistened with tears which she successfully fought back. "He told me that he was ready to die. He also said good-bye before the Terrian took him."  
  
John nodded in acknowledgment. Seeing the tears that welled in her eyes, he realized how awful the last few weeks must have been for the widow. As if the prior five months hadn't been horrible enough for her, he noted. He made an attempt to sit up in bed, but was impeded by his continuing weakness.  
  
"I'm sorry that you had to go through all of this. I'm sorry you ended up having to take care of me, too," John expressed as he strained to move himself.  
  
Bess observed what he was trying to accomplish and gently pulled him upward by his forearms. As he leaned forward, she repositioned several pillows behind him and eased him back to a sitting position.  
  
"No, don't apologize. In fact, I need to thank you. You told me how the Terrian wanted you to go with him, but you decided to stay with me instead so I wouldn't be alone."  
  
"This conversation that I supposedly had with the Digger," he softly questioned. "You didn't actually see it happen?"  
  
"Uh-uh. It was on the Dreamplane or, at least I think it was. In any case, it wasn't here in the cave. You woke up and told me about it."  
  
"Bess, I was obviously pretty sick," Danziger stated skeptically. "I probably just hallucinated the whole thing."  
  
"Not a chance. I was there and so was the Terrian," she declared confidently as she bent over and retrieved the torn pair of pants from the floor. "It happened and you'll never convince me otherwise."  
  
John was about to argue the point when he noticed that the article of clothing she was mending looked a bit too familiar. "You been goin' through my stuff?"  
  
"Well, you were unconscious for days and I was going to try to change you into some fresh clothes. So I searched through your belongings and, by the way, it's a good thing that I did. I had no idea that you only owned three shirts and two pairs of pants and all of them are in shreds."  
  
Bess appeared calm, but was beginning to ramble a bit. "I hope you don't mind, but I've been patching them up for you. It also gave me something useful to do to pass the time. You know, you should try some of Cameron's clothes. I bet his shirts will fit you, although it may take some serious hemming to get the pants to fit. If you'd like, I can work on those for you next. Maybe you should try on some of Walman's-"  
  
As Bess continued to talk, Danziger studied her features and was troubled by what he saw. Her eyes were extremely bloodshot and she looked almost as pale as he did. Although her words and voice relayed a sense of composure, he knew his friend well enough to conclude that something was off. He glanced around the cavern and noticed that the empty cots had been folded up and the personal possessions of those who had most recently died had been itemized and stacked accordingly next to the cave's exit. Additionally, their remaining equipment had been moved around and reorganized. Not only had the entire cavern been redecorated, but everything had been impeccably cleaned.  
  
John gently placed his hands over hers to stop her mid-sentence. "Bess, when was the last time you got more than an hour or two's sleep?"  
  
She tried to pull away with the garment still in her grasp, but he wouldn't let go. "What does that matter?" she asked defensively.  
  
"It matters." He took the half-fixed pair of pants from her hands and lightly tossed it aside. "I want you to lay down a take a nap," he instructed in a serious tone.  
  
She shook her head. "No, I don't need to."  
  
"This isn't up for discussion," he said a bit gruffly, baffled as to why she was reacting so strangely to his suggestion. The mechanic immediately softened his delivery and assured, "Look, I'll be fine. Just put a cup full of water and a bowl of soup next to me in case I feel like eating."  
  
She shut her eyes and her voice shook a bit as she spoke. "No, I can't."  
  
"Why not?" She didn't answer and he leaned in toward her. "Bess?"  
  
"Because bad things happen when I go to sleep," she blurted out with her eyes still closed. "Morgan was taken while I slept. Mazatl and Cameron- that's when they took them away, too. Maybe I could have done something to stop Magus and Walman if I'd just been awake. I fell asleep and you almost froze to death. If I hadn't been asleep at your bedside, the Terrian might have taken you and I wouldn't have even known it until it was too late."  
  
When she finished speaking, she opened her eyes and tears started running down her cheeks. John was somewhat rattled himself when he realized how truly frightened she was.  
  
He took both of her small hands in his own large ones and sought to calm her fears. "Bess, I've always been straight with you, haven't I? Since we've known each other, have I ever lied to you, even if I knew that you wouldn't like what I had to say?"  
  
"You've always told me the truth," she answered meekly after thinking about it a moment.  
  
"You trust me, right?"  
  
"Yes, I do."  
  
"Okay then. I swear to you that, if you go to sleep, I'll be here when you wake up." She tried to look away, but he followed her gaze. "I'm not going anywhere, Bess."  
  
"You promise?" she said in almost a childlike voice.  
  
"I promise. You won't wake up alone."  
  
Danziger let go of her hands and gave her a gentle shove, but Bess still seemed apprehensive about the idea. Keeping his tone as light as possible, he persuaded, "If I need anything, I'll yell. My God, Martin, I'm only twenty feet away!"  
  
Bess reluctantly rose to her feet as she wiped away her tears. She poured a bowl of broth and then refilled his mug to the brim with fresh water.  
  
As she set it down next to John, she capitulated, "Okay, I'll lay down for a bit. But you'll wake me if-"  
  
"Go- to- bed," he insisted, emphasizing each word for effect.  
  
The widow hesitantly returned to her own bunk and removed her boots. After looking in Danziger's direction one more time, she climbed under the covers and shut her eyes. She fell asleep instantly.  
  
_____  
  
Bess was roused from her deep slumber by the harsh gusts of wind as it whistled throughout the walls of the cave entrance. She slowly rolled over in her cot and popped open an eye to check on her patient. She was pleased to find John awake and looking relatively healthy; an amazing feat considering he'd literally been on death's door only a few days before. However, she could still hear a gurgling sound in his chest with each labored breath that he took.  
  
Danziger noticed that she was awake and asked in a raspy voice, "You feel any better?"  
  
"Hmm-mmm. How long did I sleep?" she inquired as she nestled in the warmth of the thermal blankets.  
  
The mechanic glanced at his chronometer. "A little more than fifteen hours." Bess launched up to the sitting position in alarm prompting him to tell her, "Relax, Martin. You obviously needed it."  
  
She admitted to herself that Danziger was right. For the first time in weeks, Bess felt well-rested and her head was much clearer. "How are you feeling?"  
  
"Pretty good. I bet I'm up and around in a couple of days."  
  
"I can hear how congested your lungs are, so don't push yourself too hard," she advised as she replaced her boots and put on a jacket to ward off the cold draft. "Anyway, it sounds like there's another storm outside. We're probably stuck here for awhile longer."  
  
"Well, at least you won't have to wait on me hand and foot anymore," he answered flatly.  
  
She poured herself a cup of water and then refilled his empty mug. "I didn't mind," she said as her attention was drawn to John keypunching data into a small vid-terminal situated on his lap.  
  
Bess sat down next to him on an empty box and examined the images displayed on the screen. "What are you working on?"  
  
He replied matter-of-factly, "Our house."  
  
Bess was startled by his response. "We're going to build a house? A real house?"  
  
He nodded and began to explain, taking much-needed breaths in between every few words. "Yep. I've been working on these plans for awhile. Originally, I was hoping to build two permanent homes when spring came. One was supposed to be for Cameron, Denner and you. Yale, Mazatl and I were gonna share the other. Obviously, that's changed."  
  
He coughed roughly and Bess picked up the machinery from his bed to keep it from crashing to the ground. Once the spell ended, she replaced the computer to its former position and John gave her a grateful glance before continuing, "It's not gonna be anything spectacular looking, but it should keep us protected. I don't know about you, but I don't want to live the rest of my life inside of this mountain."  
  
She gave him a quizzical look. "Will the Terrians let us do this? I mean, can we cut down trees?"  
  
Danziger shrugged his shoulders. "I think so as long as we replace what we take." He paused for a moment in deep contemplation. He set the vid-terminal aside and met her gaze. "If I tell you something, do you promise me that you won't get your hopes up?"  
  
Bess nodded her agreement and John divulged with a bit of apprehension, "There may be a way out of here."  
  
Bess began to speak, but he lifted his finger to silence her. "It has nothing to do with escaping. I think the key to unlocking our prison is to somehow convince the Diggers that we aren't a threat. This is supposed to be a test to show them how humans relate to the planet, right? When it comes down to it, you and I are living in a two mile-wide laboratory where we're being studied to see how we react to our surroundings. We need to prove to them that we can live here peacefully and not misuse the planet's resources."  
  
He paused before pensively relaying, "It may take years to do it but, maybe, just maybe, the Diggers'll decide to commute our sentence. Maybe they'll let us go if we could make them see that we aren't dangerous."  
  
Bess was floored by his idea and the possibility that she and John could someday be pardoned of their crimes and allowed their freedom by the Terrians. However, any glimmer of hope that  
  
she felt in her heart was quickly eclipsed by the harsh truth that sounded loudly in her brain.  
  
"Suppose they did release us? Where would we go? And if it takes years to free us, we'd be too late to leave on the Jamestown." She softly added, "No one would ever know that we're here."  
  
"That's not exactly true. Yes, we'd miss the colony ship, but there is someone or should I say something that knows where we are at this very moment... Eve."  
  
"But Eve knowing our location doesn't do any good, does it?" Bess wasn't sure how well John would react to the mention of Devon and Uly's names and chose her words carefully. "The people that the Council were interested in keeping tabs on are dead. You and I are expendable to them."  
  
"You're probably right. I'm just saying that we may not have to live our entire lives in this valley. That someday, we may still get to see New Pacifica after all."  
  
John's mind momentarily flashed to the day he'd been transported to the sandy beaches of the east coast. God, it was so beautiful there. The warmth of the sun, the sound of the crashing waves, the smell of the sea air, standing there at the shore with...  
  
He mentally clamped down and pushed those thoughts away before they could do any damage. It was better to concentrate on other things. "But for now, we have to plan for our survival in these mountains and it's not gonna be easy."  
  
Danziger reached out with the intention of retrieving the data-screen, but Bess captured his hand in hers. She sadly asked, "Are things ever going to get any better for us?"  
  
He placed his other hand over their joined ones and gave a reassuring squeeze. "We'll get through this, Bess." He met her dejected gaze and forced a small smile. "Besides, let's look on the bright side... it can't get much worse, right?"  
  
__________ 


	7. 7/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 7  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
John and I passed the days by planning every detail of our new home and what would be expected of the both of us when winter finally let up. We knew that there was a lot to be done and not much time to do it, especially since we were the only two left and neither of us had ever built anything like this before. I tried to open some of the architectural files for the buildings of New Pacifica, but I was unable to decipher Devon's access codes. I considered asking John to try his hand at breaking the complex series of passwords, but he'd made it clear that he didn't want anything to do with Devon's personal or professional belongings. Because his health was slowly improving and his cough was almost completely gone, I didn't want to risk him suffering a setback by digging up painful memories that he couldn't handle. At that point, it was better to just try to figure things out on our own.  
  
The temperature began to rise at the end of our fourth month in the cavern. As soon as the snow began to melt, John was out there modifying the Transrover to enable it to transport the timber that he was planning to cut down. We surveyed the entire area and decided to build our home at the site of our original camp. It was a flat area void of the rocks that permeated most of the surrounding terrain and was located far enough away from the hills to allow the solar panels to have full access to the sun's rays. The distance also prevents us from being flooded by the melting snow as it runs off the mountains. Plus, we're close to the river which has been our source of water for drinking and bathing until we can get the kinks worked out of our condenser and we get our bathroom facilities built. Next season, we might also use the river for the irrigation of our crops once we get them planted. But for now, we're living off of the fruit and berries that this valley is full of. We figure that we'd better take one careful step at a time.  
  
Unfortunately, as the first few weeks of spring progressed, I became more and more worried about John. Although he tried to keep my spirits up by reassuring me that everything would be all right, I wasn't sure if he really believed the words he was saying. On the rare occasion that he smiled, it seemed forced as if he was doing it only for my benefit. I could understand that he was depressed... so was I. There was little doubt that we were both traumatized by the events of the past nine months. I don't think that anyone could go through what we'd endured and come out unscathed.  
  
However, John wasn't dealing with any of the emotions that he should have been feeling. He still refused to talk about anything other than building our house and how to survive here in this valley. I wanted to help him to confront his demons, but I realized that I knew very little about him except that he had lost his only child and two women that he'd loved, Devon and Eleanor. He was completely shutting me out and I wasn't sure how to approach him to get him to open up to me. I just knew that I needed to do something before it was too late.  
  
- Bess Martin Journal Chronicles, Archive File, Entry Date- Year Two on G889 (Day 708)  
  
__________  
  
It was another chilly evening and Bess pulled up the collar of her jacket to shield her from the cool breeze as it whisked through the mountain range. Exiting her tent, she reflected upon the sight that greeted her eyes. It had been two months since they'd left the cave and relocated to the grasslands in the center of the valley. The area now resembled a lumber yard much more than a campsite.  
  
They had chosen to use the spruce trees that were abundant in the northern forest because of their large size and the durability of the wood. John would cut down several at a time and Bess would then scoop them up using the forklift that the mechanic had retrofitted onto the front of the Transrover. The widow soon became an expert at driving the vehicle and could flawlessly maneuver and deposit the timber into one of several groupings organized according to size. Using axes, they would sever all of the branches until only the trunk was left. It was then a matter of them stripping off the bark and allowing the wood to dry. In a few weeks, Danziger would start cutting grooves toward the edges so the timber would fit snugly against each other. It everything went to plan, their home would look similar to the log cabins constructed by American pioneers centuries before.  
  
The days were long and the work was hard. However, as horrible as their situation was, Bess had to admit that she was excited about building a home of her own. She had enjoyed working on the structural outline and it was satisfying to know that it would be built with her very own hands. She just wished that their budding homestead was located at New Pacifica and Morgan and the other Edenites had lived to share the experience, too. Her heart still ached with their absence, but she vowed to herself that she would carry onward and continue to work through her grief.  
  
The twin moons brightly illuminated the campsite as Bess strolled toward Danziger who, as usual, was keeping himself busy. Each day, he labored continuously from dawn until well after the sun had disappeared. He stubbornly refused all meal breaks and instead worked and ate at the same time. It had also become a nightly ritual for the Earth-res to attempt to get Danziger to take a breather and relax for a few hours. And on this particular night, she wasn't taking 'no' for an answer.  
  
John was in the middle of smoothing out a large rock that he hoped to use for the dwelling's fireplace and didn't notice Bess' approach. She defiantly marched straight to him and pulled the sander from his grasp.  
  
"Bess, what are you doing?" he asked in astonishment as the instrument screeched to a halt.  
  
"I want to speak to you."  
  
"Fine," he grumbled. "Gimme back my tools and start talking."  
  
She tossed the apparatus to the ground and declared, "Nope. You're done working for the night."  
  
"Bess-"  
  
"I mean it, John. Get up. You're taking the rest of the night off."  
  
She leaned over him and stared Danziger down, silently daring him to contradict her. She then grabbed him firmly by the arm and yanked him to the standing position. Bess motioned for him to follow her and he reluctantly agreed, dusting the dirt from his pants as he ambled along behind her. It was certainly nothing new for Bess to try to get him to stop working. However, tonight there was a look of determination in her eyes that hadn't been there before. At least, that's what it seemed like to Danziger. He could tell that she wouldn't be swayed and any objections on his part would just put off the inevitable. Whatever Bess wanted or needed, John figured that it would be better just to follow along and get it over with.  
  
He was grudgingly led to the large canopy tent they'd erected to house some of the smaller machinery. When they entered, the mechanic immediately noticed that most of the equipment had been moved to the corners of the enclosure. To his surprise, the center of the dwelling contained a small table with two chairs, a lumalantern and a deck of cards.  
  
"What are you planning, Martin?" he questioned suspiciously.  
  
"Nothing," she answered, somehow managing to sound sweet and obstinate at the same time. "You and I are going to play a few harmless hands of poker."  
  
"You can play?" he posed doubtfully as he folded his arms in front of him. "So how come you never joined any of the poker parties that Solace used to throw?"  
  
"Because if I had, Morgan would've thrown a fit. At the very least, he would have insisted on tagging along." She raised her eyebrows knowingly. "And I had a feeling that his presence wouldn't have been very welcome."  
  
John shrugged his shoulders, but didn't deny her statement. He briefly considered ways of avoiding Bess' well-meaning, but needless diversion so he could get back to work on the house. After all, there was so much to be done and... oh, what the hell, he thought. Stopping for a few hours won't make that much of a difference. Perhaps he could put in some extra time tomorrow to compensate for his laziness today.  
  
"All right, it's been awhile, but I could play a few hands. Are we wagering?"  
  
"Sure," she responded as they both sat down. "What did you use as bets before?"  
  
Danziger snorted. "In the beginning it was packages of Spirolina, but that changed pretty fast after we realized that there was no incentive to win." A small smile briefly escaped his lips as he began to shuffle the deck. "So we'd bet anything from personal items to who would work the late guard shift. You know, stuff like that."  
  
"I have a better idea." Bess arched forward and rested her elbows on the table. "I want to wager information."  
  
The mechanic leaned backward and uncomfortably shifted in his seat. "What kind of information?"  
  
"Nothing serious, John," she assured, trying to sound nonchalant. However, Danziger wasn't the least bit fooled. "I think that we should keep it simple. Whoever wins the hand gets to pose a question to the loser."  
  
I should have known, Danziger bitterly thought as he slammed the deck down onto the table.  
  
"Uh-uh. Count me out."  
  
He stood up to make a hasty exit, but Bess stepped in front of him.  
  
"I'm not letting you leave. You and I are going to be here a long time and I hardly know anything about you. I promise that I'll use discretion and I won't ask you anything upsetting."  
  
He shook his head and attempted to go around her, but the widow matched his movements. "Sit down and please just give this a try." Bess looked up at him with an innocent grin and added, "Besides, you could win every hand, right?"  
  
That last part made sense, he thought. If he won, he wouldn't have to tell her a thing. How good could she really be anyway?  
  
John hesitantly sank back into his seat. "Okay. Deal the cards."  
  
Bess put her poker face to good use by hiding her pleasure at having won the battle with the headstrong mechanic. She retook her place at the table and began a game of seven-card stud. It wasn't long before John knew that he was in deep trouble. The woman was a natural card player and Danziger was incredibly thankful that Bess hadn't participated in past poker nights. She would have probably cleaned him and everyone else out of everything that they owned. The Earth-res soundly won three out of every four hands.  
  
Luckily, she kept her word and limited her queries to basic knowledge. He divulged that he was thirty-seven years old and Bess mentioned that she had just turned twenty-five. They revealed their parent's names and that Bess was the oldest of four children and John was the oldest of three. John confirmed to her that he'd never graduated high school and had joined the military at the age of fifteen. The Earth-res relayed the story of how the only teacher residing in their territory had died when Bess was an infant and the government never bothered to assign another person for the job. Because of this, she had no official education and her mother had been the one to teach her how to read and write.  
  
And that's how it began. Every few days, Bess would drag Danziger to the supply tent to play cards and pull tidbits of information out of him. Slowly, she was able to piece together his childhood. His father had been killed in an electrical fire when John was nine. He was forced to quit school and take odd jobs to help support his mother and two siblings. The majority of his education consisted of his younger sister coming home from school and teaching him what she'd learned that day. Bess wasn't sure if his mother and sister were still alive, but his brother had died of a dysentery-like infection at a young age. When he was old enough, Danziger joined the Army because it was one less mouth for his mother to feed. Plus, he would have a steady paycheck to help pay their bills including the large inherited debt that had accumulated.  
  
Bess noticed that Danziger didn't seem to be bothered by discussing the events of his youth. His reluctance to talk had more to due with the fact that he was a very private man who never saw the advantages of sharing personal details with others. However, he appeared to enjoy Bess' stories of growing up on Earth and helping her mother take care of her often unruly younger brothers.  
  
Before they'd started playing cards, Bess had always limited her personal discussions with Danziger to her life with and without Morgan. She had to admit that it was fun revisiting some of her own childhood events. Still, sometimes it did leave her a bit sad knowing that her father was presumably dead and her brothers had grown up without her. They more than likely had wives and children of their own now. Not only would she never see them again, she would never know what happened to them. But she was comforted with the knowledge that, although life on Earth was tough, her family was tougher and most of them were probably still alive. Bess began to wonder if John had any family members left still living on the Stations. Come to think of it, there were still a lot of unanswered questions about him. Oh well, she reflected, only one way to find out.  
  
  
  
It was a typical night of cards with Danziger being defeated about seventy-five percent of the time. Despite usually being on the losing side of the table, the mechanic was beginning to feel more relaxed about participating in Bess' games. Of course, he knew that it was all just a ploy to extract information out of him, but he really didn't mind. She'd kept her promise by keeping her questions centered on general knowledge and deliberately avoided subjects that he wasn't prepared to discuss. Little did he know that she was about to raise the stakes.  
  
A Royal Flush. Somehow, Bess had managed a Royal Flush. John stared at her in disbelief and secretly started to wonder if she was cheating. He was going to have to watch her more carefully.  
  
Bess didn't try to mask her euphoria and giddily proclaimed herself the winner over John's measly hand of three Jacks. There was no better time to ask something that she'd been curious about for a long time.  
  
"I want you to tell me about Corinne Wyatt."  
  
Danziger's eyes narrowed to slits. "How the hell do you know about her?"  
  
"Magus told me."  
  
"How did she find out?" he asked. He shook his head and gazed at the ceiling. "Let me guess... Alex was blabbing her mouth, again."  
  
Bess shrugged as Danziger let out a string of curse words.  
  
"Oh come on, don't be mad," she said sweetly. "Magus said that she first met you, Alex and Les about five years before she was hired for Eden Project. She said that you were a good boss, but that you were kind of a, um," she looked downward and briefly considered her choice of words, "I think the term she used was 'hard-ass'."  
  
She glanced back at Danziger expecting him to be offended, but he wore a smug expression as if he'd just been paid a compliment.  
  
"Anyway, she said that you were very quiet and you never went out after hours with the crew, so she was naturally curious. So she asked Alex if you'd always been like that."  
  
At this point, John's self-satisfied look turned to alarm thinking that Bess was about bring up something he was nowhere near ready to deal with.  
  
She noticed his demeanor and hurriedly continued, "So, among other things, Alex told her about Corinne."  
  
Danziger definitely didn't want to delve into what Bess could have meant by 'other things', so he took a deep breath and concentrated on the lesser of the two evils. Actually, talking about Corinne Wyatt was no big deal. To John, that whole business had happened another lifetime ago and he was long over any anger that he may have once harbored. But he wasn't about to tell Bess that. That would make it too easy.  
  
"Well, if you already know what happened, why do you want to hear it again?"  
  
"I don't know the whole story. Just a few details and how it ended." Bess gave him her most angelic look and, in turn, John rolled his eyes. In a voice dripping with saccharine, she asked, "Please?"  
  
After a moment of contemplation, he raked his hands through his curls in exasperation. "I cannot believe that I'm tellin' you this, but okay." He sighed before plunging into his tale. "Back when I was in the military, Alex and I used to hang out at some of the bars and dance halls. There was a whole strip of 'em that surrounded the base and we'd go drinking and dancing all night long. Jeez, those were crazy times. I didn't have two credits to rub together, but I made extra money playing cards in the back rooms." He smirked and met her gaze. "Too bad, I didn't know you back then. We could've made a killing."  
  
"Sure we could've, except that I was probably only five or six years old at the time," Bess quipped back.  
  
John chuckled before continuing, "Anyway, I was always kind of big for my age. I certainly looked a helluva lot older than I was. I had this unspoken deal with a bunch of the bartenders on the strip that, if anything happened like a bar brawl or some drunk didn't want to pay his tab, they'd beep me on gear and I'd come over and help out. The bartender would transfer a few extra credits to my account or, at the very least, my buddies and I would drink for free. So this one night, I get a call that there's a fight at the bar next door. Some idiot got a little too fresh with a barmaid and all hell was breaking loose."  
  
The Earth-res was impressed. "So you went to rescue a damsel in distress?"  
  
Danziger snorted his reply. "Hardly! I get there and this woman is beating the living daylights out of the poor guy. He's on the floor screaming that she broke his nose and God knows what else. She even got in a good swing at me before I was able to pull her off of him."  
  
"Was Corinne the angry barmaid?" she asked incredulously.  
  
He shrugged and raised an eyebrow. "Needless to say there was an instant attraction." He cleared his throat and recounted, "I followed her into the kitchen and asked her out while we were cleaning the blood off of ourselves. She wasn't interested at first, but I kept after her until she finally gave in. She was a few years older than me. Beautiful, too. She had all this curly strawberry blonde hair. She was also one of the few people that I'd met that had a higher debt ratio than I did. But that didn't matter to me. And, of course, Alex warned me about her, too. Corinne had kind of a reputation in the area, but I didn't care about that either. There was nothin' that Alex or anyone else could have said to change the way I felt about Corrie. I was hooked."  
  
"So how long did you see each other?"  
  
"A little over two years. The last eight months of our relationship, I was shipped off to the Arctic for specialized training and we didn't see each other except through gear communications. I was supposed to have been there another three months, but Alex was discharged early for medical reasons. They gave me the option to leave at the same time and I took it gladly. I flew home to see my mother and told her that I was going to ask Corrie to marry me. She gave me her wedding ring to give to her." John observed Bess' eyes widen. "I guess Alex didn't tell Magus that part of the story."  
  
She shook her head as he kept talking. "So, I get to Corrie's place and there's no answer. I didn't tell her that I was coming back early so she wasn't expecting me. I knew the key code and I figured she wouldn't mind if I waited inside her apartment. That way, I could surprise her."  
  
"And was she surprised?" she asked, knowing full well where the story was going.  
  
"Oh, yeah, and so was the guy in bed with her," he affirmed. "I chased him out into the corridor and about halfway across the station before I finally got bored and turned back."  
  
Bess noticed that John had forgotten an important detail. "According to Alex, the man was running down the halls completely naked."  
  
"Well, Alex exaggerated." Danziger smiled and couldn't keep the amusement out of his voice. "He still had on his socks."  
  
Bess joined in with her own giggles. It felt good to laugh, again. "I assume that the relationship with Corrine ended after that."  
  
"Damn right. I got as far away from her as I could. Alex, Les and I got hired to work the loading docks at Kemp Industries and it took a nineteen month cold-sleep run to get to their headquarters."  
  
At last, Bess was able to push the mental picture of the crazed mechanic chasing a frightened and very nude man through a busy space station out of her head. She sighed, "It's a shame that you ended up wasting two years of your life on her."  
  
"Nah, it wasn't a waste. We had a lot of fun while it lasted and it all worked out for the best. About three months after I started my new job, I met Elle and-"  
  
John abruptly stopped as he realized his slip. His smile disappeared as he averted his eyes downward and tried to get himself together.  
  
Before Bess could offer any words of comfort, Danziger said in a low tone, "You know, it's still pretty early. I'm gonna see if I can get a few more of those floorboards nailed down before turning in."  
  
He raised his head before his mask was firmly in place and Bess got a glimpse of the pain he was hiding both from her and himself. John noticed that her eyes started to fill up with tears.  
  
Great, he thought, now I made Bess cry. God, he'd made such a mess of things.  
  
"It's all right, Bess." he soothed. "Everything'll be fine." He squeezed her hand in reassurance as he stood up. "We'll do this again soon, okay?"  
  
As John exited the tent, Bess muttered under her breath as she wiped away her tears, "It is not all right and everything will not be fine."  
  
__________ 


	8. 8/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 8  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
"Come on, Martin, rise and shine," Danziger called from outside of Bess' tent.  
  
It was getting pretty late in the morning and she was presumably still asleep. He briefly considered letting her rest, but he knew that the Earth- res would be irritated if he let her doze the day away. Plus, it was so unlike her to sleep until noon and he had to admit that he was a bit worried.  
  
He rapped his knuckle on the canvas. "Let's go, Bess. I need your help with securing the beams."  
  
Still no answer.  
  
"Bess, are you in there?"  
  
John's concerns grew and he nervously lifted the tent flap, unsure as to what sight would greet him. He certainly wasn't expecting to see Bess fully dressed, sitting cross-legged and motionless in the shadows.  
  
"Bess, you okay?"  
  
He squinted and noticed a headset embedded in her thick, brown locks.  
  
I don't believe it, she's playing in Virtual, John realized with a frown. He shook his head in disapproval. Once a Martin, always a Martin...  
  
He entered her quarters with the intention of pulling her back to reality, but stopped when he noticed another gear-set with a VR attachment placed on top of a small vid-unit on the ground next to her. He made his way over to the equipment and picked up the gear to enable him to read the message displayed on the screen.  
  
/John, please use the headset and join me in VR. Bess/  
  
He was most certainly not a fan of virtual reality and considered his options. He could ignore the whole thing and leave, but he couldn't get any more work done without Bess' assistance. He was also suspicious of Bess' reasons for asking him to accompany her in VR. This better not be another scheme, he thought.  
  
He studied her face and noted that she looked almost emotionless. He wondered how many hours she'd been logged on and worried that she might have suffered one of those VR breakdowns that had become urban legends back on the Stations. Danziger seated himself across from the Earth-res and shoved the apparatus onto his head.  
  
"Hear goes nothin'," he mumbled and entered the program.  
  
He found himself sitting at a round table affixed with a plain white linen. He was surrounded by darkness, but strangely he and the furniture were illuminated by an unseen light from above. John was about to call out to Bess when she emerged from the shadows on the opposite side of the table.  
  
"Hi," she warmly welcomed, trying her best not to appear too nervous. "I'm really glad you came."  
  
The obvious lack of control over the situation put Danziger on edge. "What's going on?" he asked defensively. "What is this place and why am I- why are we here?"  
  
Bess explained, "This is something that I created awhile back and it's time that I share it with you."  
  
Scanning the blackness around them, he cynically commented, "No offense, but it's not much of a program."  
  
"That's because I was waiting for you to get here before I activated it. This is a modification of a VR chip that I already owned. It's not interactive and we won't actually be participating in the program itself. We're more like a visitor and the idea is to observe what's going on around us."  
  
She swallowed hard and her voice became serious. "I've been coming here for months and it's been an incredible help to me. I think that it can also help you."  
  
Yep, another scheme. "I'm outta here," John indignantly announced and reached up to his eyes to deactivate his unseen gear.  
  
The widow lunged across the table and grabbed his hands, pleading, "Wait, please don't go. You asked me once if I trusted you and I said yes. That's because I do trust you- completely. Now, I'm asking you to do the same by putting your faith in me. Trust me and do this. Stay here and see this through."  
  
Their gazes were locked and John could see how important it was to Bess that he remain. She felt his resistance gradually weaken and she let go of his hands as he lowered them to the table. Danziger silently nodded his agreement and she began the program.  
  
John's senses were instantly overwhelmed. An arrangement of white summer flowers with a lamp sprouting up from its center appeared in the middle of the table along with several pieces of tableware and half-filled glasses. The room became so bright that he shielded his eyes and looked toward the ground. To his amazement, the darkened floor had become a pattern of black and white squared tiles. The air around him was filled with the sounds of music and voices that he'd heard before. And suddenly, Danziger knew exactly where he was.  
  
It was Bess and Morgan's wedding reception.  
  
His head shot up and viewed Alonzo as he circled in front of him, effortlessly twirling his pretty synth-dance partner as they swung to the beat of a big band song.  
  
"-and she countered with forever," John heard Morgan happily proclaim as he and Bess crossed the pilot's path.  
  
Baines, Walman, Magus, Eben. They were all there. Danziger's eyes bulged as he watched an image of himself lowering his fiery redheaded companion into a slow dip. As he lifted her back up and slid his hand down her pale arm, she winked at him with that mischievous look that he knew so well.  
  
He tore his gaze away and uneasily settled it on a kneeling Devon as she doted on Uly who was seated next to her. She looked almost impossibly elegant in her fitted black dress and perfectly styled hair. At that moment, it seemed to Danziger that Devon resembled a member of royalty much more than part of the ragtag crew of Eden Advance. And certainly not someone who would ever have given a Drone like him a second glance. But that didn't mean that he hadn't loved her and he could feel his heart breaking as he drank in her form.  
  
Tears filled his eyes as he looked beyond them to see True uncomfortably swaying with a nameless child that John had programmed as her dance partner. She appeared bored and aimlessly scanned the room until her saucer-brown eyes seemed to look directly at him.  
  
Danziger couldn't take any more. He reached up and tore the gear-set from his head, ripping out a handful of his hair as he flung the equipment across the room. A dozen emotions warred for dominance within him as he was overtaken by a dizzying sense of panic and anger. His heart was beating wildly and he brought his hand up to his mouth to stop himself from vomiting what little food he had in his stomach.  
  
"SON OF A BITCH!" he hollered.  
  
Bess deactivated the program and was just in time to see Danziger furiously crab-crawling backward out of the tent and into the blinding sunlight.  
  
"John! Wait a minute!"  
  
Ignoring her calls, he scrambled to his feet and bolted toward the forest. He had to get away before he exploded. He was too overwhelmed by the memories and too upset with Bess for duping him into reliving them. He concluded that the best thing to do was to find a secluded spot away from her so he could simmer down and regroup. That always seemed to work when True used to push his buttons. True...  
  
"John!"  
  
He could hear her footsteps as she sprinted to catch up to him. "I can't talk to you now, Bess."  
  
The Earth-res continued to follow him. "We need to discuss this."  
  
"Right now, you definitely don't wanna hear what I have to say," he seethed as he disappeared into the shade of the trees.  
  
Bess knew that she had to somehow stop him. She needed John to emotionally react to what he'd just experienced before he was able to bury it into the recesses of his mind.  
  
Bess raised her voice and spat, "Fine. Walk away from me. Walk away from everything. That's what you do best."  
  
Danziger stopped dead in his tracks and whipped around to face her. "You wanna fight about this?" he snarled.  
  
"If you're mad at me, I want you to tell me," Bess insisted as she mentally readied herself for the verbal onslaught.  
  
No longer able to contain his fury, he erupted like a volcano. "You're goddamn right I'm mad at you! TRUST YOU!" He closed the distance between them, but didn't lower the volume of his voice. "You said to trust you! How could you just throw me in there without any warning? To suddenly be there and see True? To see Devon and Uly? To watch myself dancing with Elle? All the other Edenites smiling and happy like they don't have a care in the shanking world?"  
  
She had expected this reaction and steadfastly held her ground. She was also pleased that John was able to speak True and Devon's name without hesitation.  
  
Wait a minute, Bess asked herself, did he just say Elle?  
  
She temporarily ignored the revelation and concentrated on keeping him talking, or yelling as the case may be.  
  
"You're not dealing with your emotions. I thought the shock of seeing them again would get you to start working through your grief."  
  
He pointed at her defiantly. "Don't you dare tell me how to grieve! I'm handling it!"  
  
Bess was furious at his continued reluctance to acknowledge his suffering and she responded with some built up rage of her own. "Have you taken a good look at yourself lately, John? You're skin and bones because you don't eat! You never sleep! It's like pulling teeth to get you to talk about even the most mundane subject! You're not handling anything! I'm watching you die from the inside out."  
  
He knifed his fingers through his hair and shook his head ferociously. "That's a bunch of bullshit! You think I'm gonna drop dead now after everything we've been through?"  
  
Bess took a step backward and composed herself. "Yes, I do. I'm beginning to understand how you think," she softly disclosed, "and I'm onto you."  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?"  
  
"I know what you're planning. You may not even be aware of what you're doing, but it'll happen unless I stop you," she stated.  
  
Danziger's brows furrowed both in confusion and exasperation. "What?"  
  
"You didn't leave with the Terrian because you knew that I wouldn't survive here by myself. You stayed behind to make sure that I would be all right," she explained. Her voice increased with emotion with each syllable as she expressed her concern for her friend. "When the house is done, when you're certain that I'll have a roof over my head and enough food to live on, you're going to let yourself die. I'm absolutely positive of it."  
  
John couldn't believe what he was hearing. The idea that she was trying to save his life did little to diminish the ferocity of his response.  
  
He leaned into her to further disrupt her personal space and menaced, "So you think you're onto me, huh? Well, I'm onto you, too, Bess! You've invented some ridiculous scenario in that warbled head of yours that I'm slowly committing suicide. That gives you the green light to make me your latest pet project to play with to keep your mind off other things. Like the fact that you can't meddle in anyone else's personal life because there's no one left. They're all dead!"  
  
Bess attempted to turn away, but he grabbed her by the arm and swung to back to face him. "How about the fact that you and I are going to die here alone and forgotten in this godforsaken valley? Won't be anyone mourning for us and I doubt the Diggers'll give a shit!"  
  
They were almost nose to nose now and Bess attempted to wrangle from his grasp, but Danziger tightened his grip and roared, "And most of all, screwing around with my head keeps you from dealing with your own pain over losing Morgan. This isn't about my grief, lady! This isn't about me at all! It's about YOU!"  
  
As soon as the words left his mouth, the mechanic regretted what he'd said. He could see by the look on Bess' face that he'd hurt her badly and he immediately released his hold on her. As soon as he let go, she retreated a few paces backward from him.  
  
Bess felt as if he had struck her. She secretly admitted to herself that being physically hit by John would hurt less than the pain she now felt from his brutal words. They stared at each other in shock as they struggled to regain control of themselves.  
  
"Bess-" he finally sputtered out.  
  
Still unable to speak, Bess turned and set out for the northern forest. Danziger continued to call out to her, but she never looked back and silently vanished into the woods. After a few moments, he wandered in a stupor toward the trees to the west.  
  
_____  
  
Several hours had passed when Danziger decided that he and Bess needed to clear the air. He was surprised that she was not found under her favorite maple tree, although he noticed from the indentations in the surrounding dirt that she'd been there recently. He searched the immediate area and worked his way southeastward toward the caves, but was unable to locate her. Because the daylight was waning, he returned to camp to grab a lumalight and returned to the western woods.  
  
He breathed an enormous sigh of relief when he finally found Bess sitting on a fallen log at the edge of the lake. It was the exact spot he'd occupied before he'd left to find her.  
  
"I got worried," she said quietly as she heard him approach. "I figured you'd be here."  
  
"I was, but I went to look for you," he answered just as softly.  
  
Her gaze stayed fixated on the sun as it gradually sank into the horizon. John found himself momentarily distracted by the myriad of orange and purple clouds encircling the setting orb. He'd spent so many days at this very location yet this was the first time that he'd noticed the astonishing beauty of the sunset from this vantage point.  
  
"Bess, I need to tell you how sorry I am," he said ashamedly as he took a few steps closer to her. "I should've never said those things to you."  
  
"I'm- I'm so scared, John," she whispered in a shaky voice.  
  
Danziger froze in place, assuming that she'd recoil from him if he advanced further. Damn him and his temper, he chastised himself.  
  
"You're afraid of me?" he asked, trying not to sound as wounded as he felt.  
  
"No, I'm afraid for you," she disclosed as she turned to face him. "And I'm afraid for me, too. There was a lot of truth in what you said. I have been treating you like a pet project. I do have a habit of poking my nose in where it doesn't belong and trying to fix other people's problems even if it wasn't my place to do so."  
  
She stood and took the remaining steps to him. "I didn't mean to hurt you and I swear that I was only trying to help. I'm so sorry."  
  
Danziger was caught completely off-guard as she wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her face in his jacket.  
  
After a few seconds, she sobbed, "For most of my life, I've taken care of people. When my mother died, I filled in for her and raised my three brothers. I helped my father out any way that I could working in the mines. Then there was Morgan. He was so lost sometimes." She paused for a moment, deep in thought. "I know that you don't need anyone to take care of you, it's just... it's all I know how to do."  
  
She pulled back to wipe away her tears and met his sympathetic gaze. "You know what I'm talking about, John. You've been doing the same thing all your life, too. You've always looked out for everyone around you."  
  
He noticeably stiffened and averted his eyes. "No, I haven't," he objected in a low tone.  
  
"I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you," she said earnestly.  
  
"You don't know that." John removed himself from her embrace and took a step back. "Why do you think that you were the only one who didn't get sick last winter? It's because you refused to give up like Mazatl and Yale and everyone else. You were the strongest of us all, Bess." He sighed and added, "You're stronger than I am."  
  
John moved away and seated himself on the fallen tree. He focused on the ground and continued, "And don't be sorry. I've been doing a lot of thinking and you were right to do what you did. I'm also willing to make a promise to you that I won't give up either now or after the house is built. You can trust me on that."  
  
He lifted his gaze and, for the first time, Bess noticed that Danziger's eyes were as swollen as hers.  
  
He shook his head in remorse. "But there's no excuse for how I acted today. Haven't really been much in the way of company for awhile now. I owe you a lot, Bess, and I hope you can forgive me."  
  
Bess took a seat next to him and smiled warmly to show that all was forgiven. It was obvious that both of them had spent the last few hours addressing some very difficult issues in their lives. She prayed that John was willing to accept her support and begin to deal with his loss.  
  
"Will you tell me something?" she asked. "The woman that you were dancing with. That was Eleanor?"  
  
"Yeah," he answered with a slight hesitation. She could see how tough it was for him. "That was a big step for me to program her as my dance partner. I didn't really have to worry about True at the time because she would never have suspected anything. They looked nothing alike."  
  
"You're right. There wasn't a resemblance at all," she agreed.  
  
"Didn't look too much like me either, but True was definitely a Danziger. She looked amazingly like my sister when she was that age."  
  
Bess looked at him in confusion. "You didn't have a problem seeing Elle the day of my wedding. Why does it hurt so much for you to see her now? Are you still in love with her?"  
  
Danziger stuck in hands in his jacket and shrugged. He didn't want to go down this road. "No. I mean, there'll always be a part of me that will care for her, but I'm no longer in love with her."  
  
"Then why do you avoid talking about her?" John didn't answer so she persisted, "Why?"  
  
Danziger looked away as the admission was quietly ripped from his soul. "I murdered her child, Bess," he whispered as his eyes welled with tears. "I can't think of Elle without remembering what I did."  
  
"John, you didn't kill True."  
  
"Yes, I did. I killed the only part of Elle that survived. I murdered our beautiful little girl." He placed his head in his hands and muttered, "I don't understand. Why didn't the Diggers take me? I'm the one who caused all of this."  
  
"All of what?" Bess had absolutely no idea what he was talking about. "What did you cause, John?"  
  
"This! All of this!" Danziger kept his head buried in his left hand and made a wide sweeping motion with his right. "From the moment I set foot on this planet, I've been causing one problem after another. I'm the reason that the Diggers think we're no better than penal colonists!"  
  
He took a sharp breath and lowered his voice an octave. "Shoot first, ask questions later. Pick fights with anyone who didn't see things my way. I almost blew Gaal's brains out the first week we were here. When the Terrians asked us to free them from that psycho, I didn't wanna help them until Uly got sick. When you, Morgan and Yale were captured by the Terrians, I was planning to set off another geolock. After I was outvoted, I went into that cave armed to the teeth and ready to kill any Digger that looked at me funny. And let's not forget that I killed Katrina."  
  
Bess tried to lay a hand on his shoulder, but he shook her away.  
  
"It wasn't enough that I murdered and ate a Grendler. I convinced the other three to do it, too. I made Julia cut into that poor animal and-" John's voice cracked and he was forced to stop so he could regain control of his emotions.  
  
In those few moments of stillness, Bess realized for the first time that Danziger was the only one from the botched scout to recover Cargo Pod #9 who hadn't been eliminated by the Terrians. Obviously, he'd already made the connection and was now using it as further evidence to convict himself.  
  
"It's no wonder the ancient Terrian we dug up chose me as its host. It was a ruthless monster bent on killing anything that got in its way... just like me."  
  
"John, you are not a monster," she said in sincerity as she grabbed his hand to comfort him.  
  
Danziger climbed to his feet and tried to pull back, but she refused to let go.  
  
"Don't you understand?" he blurted out. "Everyone would still be alive if it wasn't for me. This is all my fault!"  
  
Bess stared at him in amazement as she tried to absorb his confession. Suddenly, the puzzle pieces began to fall together and it all started making sense. John had been dealing with considerably more than the loss of True and Devon. She now understood his reluctance to retake his place as the leader of Eden Advance when Devon died. He truly believed that his prior actions had been the catalyst that motivated the Terrians to hand down their death sentences. He no longer trusted his own judgment and was afraid that any decision he made would end up causing more harm to those who remained behind. She flashed to the memory of the mechanic telling her that he was to blame for the deaths of Baines, Magus and Walman. Why hadn't she paid more attention to his words?  
  
Her mind spun as she remembered that Danziger had resumed his leadership duties only after Bess had agreed to be co-leader. He'd always taken her opinion very seriously and never made the slightest move without discussing it with her first. She'd mistakenly believed that John was trying to be kind by including her in the decision making process to keep her mind off of Morgan. The truth of the matter was that any confidence he'd had in his abilities as a leader had been evaporated by guilt and fear. Danziger had been depending on her to keep him from making any wrong choices and possibly costing more lives. My God, she reflected in wonderment, John had been carrying this weight on his shoulders for a year.  
  
All of these thoughts went through her mind in a fraction of a second. "You're wrong," she said as she stood and attempted to embrace him.  
  
Danziger held her back by her shoulders and staggered backward. "Stop it, Bess. Stop being nice to me. I'm the reason that you're a widow," he said in an anguished voice.  
  
"You'll never convince me of that. Every one of us made mistakes." She decided to switch tactics as she reinitiated eye contact. "John, do you think that I'm a murderer?"  
  
"Of course not," he hastily replied, bewildered that she could ever think such a thing.  
  
Her own confession spilled out of her. "Why not? I was partly responsible for setting off the geolock. And why? Because of greed. I cheated on my husband with another man. Yes, it was only in my mind, but that doesn't make a difference. In my heart, it was still adultery. I told Morgan that our marriage was a mistake. Even after we'd worked everything out and got remarried, we continued to fight all of the time."  
  
Her own voice began to quiver and she took a deep breath to calm herself before continuing. "Those last few months before Morgan died, just about everyone was at each other's throats. We were tired of traveling. We barely had enough rations to keep going. Devon's attitude after she was healed only made things worse. The Terrians were probably watching us and saw how badly we were behaving ourselves. It's no wonder they reconsidered whether or not they want us on their planet."  
  
John found that he lacked the energy to respond and planted himself back on the fallen log facing away from the Earth-res.  
  
"I feel guilty, too. I don't know why the Terrians chose to punish Morgan and True, but spared us. But what I am sure of is that you aren't responsible for it. Neither of us are," Bess said as she took a seat beside him. "You didn't cause their deaths, John, and it's time for you to stop blaming yourself."  
  
Danziger shook his head and softly spoke, "I want to believe you."  
  
"You've got to believe me because it's the truth."  
  
She slid her arm under his jacket and around his waist as she laid her head on his shoulder. Bess was glad that he didn't pull away and she could feel him begin to relax. He slowly placed his arm around her as well.  
  
As he set his chin on top of her curls, he whispered, "Thank you."  
  
After a few minutes of silence, Bess uttered, "Tell me about her."  
  
"Tell you about who?" John asked.  
  
"I don't care. Just start talking."  
  
They sat together and shared their memories as they watched the last remnants of the golden sun disappear into the hills beyond the valley. It was a breathtaking sight and both of them inwardly considered returning to the same spot tomorrow to witness the event, again.  
  
__________ 


	9. 9/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 9  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
Autumn had just begun when Bess and John were able to move their belongings into their new house. Of course, it was far from a completed project, but the structure was sound enough to protect them from the elements. The front door opened to a main living room which included a stone fireplace and a couch, the only piece of furniture that Danziger had made so far. To the left of it would be the kitchen as soon as he could get around to building the cabinets and Gerry-rigging a stove. There was a small back door which, if Bess had her way, would hopefully one day open to a greenhouse. An enclosed space about the size of a large walk-in closet housed their bathroom. It contained an open crate that served as their bathtub complete with a spout that connected to a water tank located on the outside wall of the residence. John also installed a crude piping system that would enable the water from the tub and the neighboring sink to drain to a section of field where they were planning to plant crops the following spring.  
  
They stripped the glass from the Transrover's windshield to use as the windows in each of their bedrooms which were located at opposite ends of the home. Although their own rooms were small, there was more than enough space for their cots, a nightstand and anything else they wanted to use to house their personal items. They didn't feel the need to install doors to the bedrooms or the bathroom and instead hung linens on thick rods to ensure their privacy. It wasn't overly spacious and there was still a lot of work to be done, but it was home to Bess and John and they were grateful to live there.  
  
With winter fast approaching, they moved the vehicles and all of their nonessential equipment into the largest of the two caverns. Because of the home's high ceiling, Danziger planned on building a loft to store food and other necessary provisions. But for now, piles of crates lined the walls of the main room of the house. Bess put herself in charge of the food supply again. It wasn't a difficult task to complete due to her expert knowledge of canning and her familiarity with the fruits, nuts and berries of the valley. Not to mention that, unlike the prior season, she only had to stock enough for two people. In her spare time, she concentrated on making curtains, readying the soil outside their front door for planting a garden in the spring and anything else she could think of to turn their house into a home.  
  
Of course, creating a household meant building furniture and that's where John came in. No sooner had he finished nailing down the final roof shingle when Bess gave him a list of over a dozen things that she wanted him to make.  
  
"...a shelving unit near the front door, cabinets next to the back door, a table to set in front of the couch, we could use another chair in the living room," she chirped as she followed behind him.  
  
"Anything else?" came the sarcastic reply.  
  
A smile graced her lips. She knew that a busy Danziger was a happy Danziger or, at the very least, a less grumpy Danziger. "Well, since you asked..."  
  
Both of them had made great strides in confronting their sometimes overpowering grief. John was taking better care of himself and, by the time they'd moved into the cabin, he'd gained back all of the weight he'd lost the prior year. Better yet, Bess no longer had to rely on her card playing abilities to force the mechanic into conversation. They spent hours talking and sharing stories about themselves and their lives before Eden Project.  
  
Admittedly, some days were better than others. They suffered through the birthdays of their loved ones along with the anniversaries of events such as Bess' marriage, their crash landing onto the planet and the dates of each Edenite's death. Those sad times were often partially spent at the graveyard which John had enclosed with a small fence, complete with the sign 'Eden Cemetery'. Bess lined the entrance with blooming plants and frequently laid flowers at each grave to signify that none of them had been forgotten in their hearts and minds.  
  
Sometimes, one person had to literally drag the other out of bed to face the day. Surprisingly, Bess was just as guilty of this as Danziger. In the daytime, she was usually able to focus on the bright side of her situation, a skill she had mastered many years before. However, her true feelings were unmasked at night while she slept and her dreams were often filled with visions of death and fear of the unknown. Some mornings, she would wake up so emotionally drained that she could barely swing her legs out of her cot.  
  
Today was one such morning.  
  
The widow slid open the curtain that separated her quarters from the rest of the house and shuffled into the living room. She hoped that John was already up and had made coffee. She needed something strong to help shake herself out of the horrible nightmares she'd endured. Last night's were particularly frightening and involved the Terrians performing hideous experiments on her dead body along with the cadavers of the other Edenites. Needless to say, she did not awaken in a very agreeable mood.  
  
As she approached the fireplace, she was surprised to find that, not only was there no coffee pot on their makeshift stove, Danziger hadn't even bothered to start a fire. It was only then that she noticed how cold the cottage was and she rubbed her forearms with her hands to ward off the chill. She reached out to grab a few logs from the small woodpile they kept next to the hearth, but found an empty space instead.  
  
That's strange, she thought. John's usually pretty good about making sure that we have enough wood for the fire. She peered toward his bedroom which still had the curtain drawn. She wasn't sure what time it was, but it felt pretty late in the morning and he should be awake by now.  
  
"Hey, John, you want some coffee?" she asked as she fumbled around in search of the coffee pot.  
  
"John, you up yet?"  
  
Danziger still didn't respond to her calls so she decided to go physically shake him awake. Sure he'd be a little cranky, but that was a small price to pay for a warm fire and a caffeinated drink.  
  
"John, I hope you're dressed because I'm coming in."  
  
As Bess grabbed the curtain to move it out of her way, a cloud of dust filled the air. After coughing the grime out of her lungs, she said in a slightly perturbed tone, "Time to get up, John. For one thing, you need to take this curtain outside and clean it. It's filthy."  
  
She went directly to his window to draw the drapes and allow the sunlight in. She immediately noticed that the window fabric was also coated with dust and terribly faded. She felt a draft blow across the room and realized that the glass of the window had cracked from top to bottom.  
  
"My God, Danziger, what the hell happened in here?"  
  
She swung around to confront him and was horrorstricken to find an empty cot buried under layer after layer of thick cobwebs.  
  
"What's going on? John, where are you?"  
  
She hurried back into the living room, each step leaving light footprints in the dirt-covered floor. She rushed passed broken dishes, overturned lanterns, untouched crates of clothing and other supplies, all of which were almost completely camouflaged by years of accumulated dust.  
  
"JOHN!" she screamed frantically.  
  
She swung open the front door and ran as fast as she could into the open field. Only a few hundred yards away, she halted at a rotted out fence housing fourteen stone markers that were mostly obscured by overgrown brush. A faded sign with the words 'Eden Cemetery' was leaned up against a cluster of dead bushes. Bess' world started to spin as she came to the horrifying conclusion that everyone was gone. She was the only one left.  
  
  
  
Bess catapulted herself upright in her bed, shaking and panting as she tried to regain her equilibrium.  
  
"It was just a dream. It was only a dream," she sputtered repeatedly to herself.  
  
She closed her eyes and tried to slow her breathing down without success. Bess knew that her heart wouldn't be pacified until she'd made sure that John was still there with her and she wasn't left behind to face life alone. She fumbled for her robe in the darkness and swiftly threw it over her nightgown. Her hands were still quivering as she slid the curtain open and made her way into the living room.  
  
She felt a wave of relief wash over her when she viewed Danziger seated on the couch, deep in concentration as he fiddled with the circuitry of a small space heater he was attempting to build. She silently observed the mechanic as he accidentally allowed two wires to briefly touch and was given a healthy jolt of electricity. Bess found herself blushing a bit as he responded with a litany of vividly expressive words that he reserved for special occasions such as this. The man has a gift, she thought. Even back on Earth, she'd never heard some of the colorful profanity that now spilled so easily from his lips. But to look on the bright side, it was proof to her that she was wide awake and definitely not alone.  
  
John had been completely oblivious to Bess' presence and jumped slightly when he realized that she was standing right next to him.  
  
"Sorry, Bess, am I making too much noise?" Danziger said a bit sheepishly, hoping that she hadn't heard his expletive-filled tirade. Before the widow could answer, he noticed the haunted look in her eyes and that she was perspiring despite a chill in the air. "You okay? Did you have another nightmare?"  
  
Bess nodded as she took a seat on the opposite end of the couch.  
  
"You wanna talk about it?" he posed as he set the space heater on the ground.  
  
She shook her head uncomfortably. "It's stupid."  
  
"Let me be the judge of that."  
  
Bess crossed her arms and rocked forward as her stomach twisted into knots. "I-I can't really talk about it yet. Maybe later, okay?"  
  
"Sure," Danziger agreed.  
  
He went to the blazing fire and poured two mugs of coffee, handing one to her as he retook his seat.  
  
"Why are you up so late?" she queried after taking a sip of the steaming brew.  
  
"Same reason as you."  
  
"Really?" Bess straightened up, her interest piqued. "What was your nightmare about?"  
  
John shrugged. "The usual stuff. I have the same couple of dreams over and over again. Tonight's was the one where you and everyone else are sinking. I can't get to any of you in time and one by one you disappear into the ground." He looked down and absently tapped at the half- constructed heater with his foot. "Usually wake up in a cold sweat from that one."  
  
Bess shuddered as she remembered what Magus and Walman had told her regarding the details of Devon's death. She'd heard about the mechanic's frantic attempt to save Devon and his rage when the earth claimed her life. It had taken five people and a sedative to physically restrain Danziger and prevent him from attacking the Terrian and meeting the same terrible fate. She couldn't imagine how helpless John must have felt as he watched the second woman he loved die right in front of him. She counted herself lucky that she didn't have to live with the memory of Morgan screaming in terror as he was pulled into the ground and buried alive.  
  
She also realized that Danziger's nightmare shared a common theme with her own. In both dreams, they had been left alone and, for the first time, she understood that John was just as afraid of abandonment as she was. Although she was sorry that he struggled with her identical fear of solitude, it also comforted her in a strange way. It made her feel less alone.  
  
The Earth-res decided that a change in subject would be for the best. Plus, there was something else that had been unsettling to her. "Have you been keeping up with your gear journals?"  
  
"Uh-uh. Haven't done one since before True died."  
  
Bess turned her gaze to the fire. "I just started again a few weeks before we finished the house. I wanted to try to fill in everything that's happened to us since the Terrians took us prisoner. That way, there'll be a record after we're gone."  
  
She let out an uneasy sigh before continuing. "Maybe someday another group will locate our campsite. I know that there won't be any bodies for them to find. But this way, they'll know our story. They'll know that we were here." And we can warn them to get the hell away from this planet, she added in her mind.  
  
"That's a good idea," Danziger nodded and swallowed his last gulp of coffee.  
  
"The problem is that, earlier tonight, I listened to what I'd recorded so far. I can't believe how bitter I sounded."  
  
He scratched at the stubble of his beard and said quietly, "You have every right to be bitter."  
  
She turned toward him as she noted in a distressed tone, "But it's more than that. I hardly recognized my voice."  
  
"Well, that doesn't surprise me all that much. You're a different person than you were fifteen months ago. We both are."  
  
Bess fidgeted nervously with the knot on her robe as she contemplated the best way to phrase her next question.  
  
"John, do you think were, um," her voice shook a bit, "do you think that maybe we've gone crazy?"  
  
She looked at him with eyes filled with anxiety. Although he didn't wish to further upset her, John felt that it was necessary to tell her the truth.  
  
"I don't think that anyone can live through what we have and not end up a little nuts." Before she could react negatively, he attempted to lighten the weight of his words. He leaned in toward her with raised eyebrows and a mild smirk. "But if it makes you feel any better, I've always thought that you were a few bricks shy of a load."  
  
She let out a snort and smacked his shoulder as John grinned back at her. He was glad to see her crack a smile, particularly since he'd just relayed that both of them were very likely mentally unsound. In truth, he couldn't really ascertain his own state of mind much less Bess'. He could see that she was having a rough time and hated to see her look so frightened. He also knew that his emotional status wasn't much better.  
  
But these last few months, he'd gained a lot of headway in dealing with his guilt and grief. Of course, he owed this all to Bess. Her refusal to give up on him was the only reason that he was still alive. In turn, he solemnly promised to himself that he wouldn't give up on her either. He would keep his best friend safe, no matter what the cost.  
  
Noticing that the flames were dwindling, Bess rose to her feet and carefully placed another log into the fire. When she rejoined him on the couch, Danziger couldn't help but notice that she was looking at him a bit peculiarly. She had something else that she wanted to say to him, but she wasn't sure what his reaction would be.  
  
"What?" he asked hesitantly. "Come on, out with it, Martin."  
  
She took a deep breath and expressed, "Please don't take this the wrong way, but I hope that we die at the same time."  
  
"Yeah, I was thinking the same thing," he responded in earnest as he took her hand to comfort her. "But until that day comes, you and I have got to stick together, all right? We're a team." He gave her fingers a squeeze of encouragement as he leaned in toward her. "Okay?"  
  
"Okay," she nodded, slightly surprised. She had expected him to dismiss her admission as nothing more than a byproduct of her desolation. It hadn't occurred to her that he might feel the same way.  
  
Danziger let go of her hand and Bess stood to return to her quarters. However, after staring in the direction of her darkened bedroom, she reconsidered her options.  
  
"Would you mind if I stayed out here with you for awhile?"  
  
John agreed, scooting to the far corner of the couch as Bess wedged a small cushion against the outside of his leg. She laid her head down and curled into a ball facing toward the fireplace. Her eyes remained wide open and Danziger could tell by her rigid posture that she was frightened to fall asleep.  
  
"We'll get through this, Bess," he comforted, gently smoothing back the hair from her face as he had so often with True when she used to have nightmares.  
  
Between the warmth of the fire and John's soothing touch, Bess' eyes gradually began to flicker. She draped her arm over Danziger's knee as final corroboration that she wasn't in this alone and drifted off into a peaceful sleep.  
  
__________  
  
Bess and John made it through their third winter on G889 without any of the hindrances that had plagued the members of Eden Advance in prior years. Although the biting cold and several feet of snow kept them from venturing outdoors for about two months, it was unquestionably the mildest winter yet. They also had the luxuries of a permanent roof over their head and a roaring fire to keep them warm and cook over. There was an abundance of food, clothing and other supplies as well. They continued to watch over each other like hawks to ensure that they both stayed healthy and got the support that each of them needed to survive the long days and longer nights.  
  
When they weren't working on projects such as building furniture or constructing the various components of their kitchen, they would find other things to keep them occupied. Bess often experimented with new recipes and Danziger became the official food taster (or guinea pig as he liked to call it). He was amazed at Bess' aptitude for taking a few fruits and vegetables and creating a delicious feast.  
  
Nevertheless, she did suffer the occasional miss. One meal was so awful that John suggested that she save a jar of it, both for posterity and just in case they ever needed a substance that could remove paint from the vehicles. He teased her mercilessly about it and she contemplated teaching him a lesson by refusing to cook. However, she thought better of it when she remembered that Danziger's own cooking could easily be classified as a biohazard.  
  
They spent their nights by the fire playing cards and telling stories or stale jokes. They never argued although both enjoyed tossing the occasional barb at each other (all in good-natured fun, of course). They could talk about anything to one another and often asked outlandish questions that could keep them in discussions for hours on end.  
  
One such evening, Bess inquired, "What if you and I were miraculously transported back to the Stations right now. What would you do? Where would you go?"  
  
"Okay, you're saying that it would be twenty-five years after we left. No additional twenty-two years of cold-sleep to get back," John clarified.  
  
"Mmm-mmm. We just materialized back on the docks of New Mars Station."  
  
"And we wouldn't have to worry about the Council interfering in our lives."  
  
"Nope. You'd be just another face in the crowd."  
  
The mechanic thought about it for a moment as he leaned back on the couch. "I dunno. I guess I'd go back to the Quadrant."  
  
She looked at him as if he'd grown a second head. "But why? Your debt would be paid off. You could live your life as a Citizen and live in the upper sectors."  
  
Oh yeah, he could already see the mortified faces of the residents watching him move into their community. There goes the neighborhood. "Nah. I don't think I'd really fit in there. Whether I'm debt-free or not, I'd still be a Drone to them. Hell, I'd still be a Drone to me. I'd probably just get a job and try to quietly live out my life in the Quad. It's where I belong."  
  
Bess didn't seem to like his answer and frowned, so he posed, "What about you?"  
  
She didn't hesitate in her reply. "I'd go back to Earth."  
  
"You're kidding?" Danziger said in astonishment. She immediately looked hurt and he back-peddled, "I mean, there's nothing wrong with living there, but you wouldn't have to. I assume that you have a pretty healthy credit account waiting for you if you went back to the Stations. You could start your life over again."  
  
"I don't want to start my life over again. I'd rather pick up where I left off when I left my family behind," she responded. "Of course, there would be some changes."  
  
"Naturally."  
  
"My father is probably dead, but I bet my brothers are alive. I could still have a relationship with them and get to know their wives and children." She smiled as she imagined what they might look like. "Two of my three brothers are about your age now."  
  
"That old, huh?" John muttered sarcastically.  
  
She gave him a saintly look before continuing, "And think of all the good that my credit account could do on Earth. I could start schools, purchase medical equipment, build greenhouses so Earthers could know what real fruits and vegetables taste like." She enthusiastically proclaimed, "And you could come, too!"  
  
Danziger's eyes widened as she asked, "You don't have any family left Stationside, do you?"  
  
"No, they're all dead."  
  
"Then come with me. You could teach Residents how to update and maintain their equipment. You've always been able to build just about anything that you set your mind to. There's no limit to what a man with your skills could achieve."  
  
She gazed at the ceiling as her excitement shifted to wistfulness. "It would be a hard life for us, but think of the positive effect that we could have. All the people that we could help by showing them what we've learned from our time on this planet."  
  
She looked to Danziger for his reaction and he could only stare at her in complete shock. It amazed him that, despite all she'd lived through, Bess' thoughts still focused on helping others. He was also more than a little amused that she was trying so hard to convince him to partake in something that was a virtual impossibility. He couldn't help but be flattered, though.  
  
Bess finally realized the absurdity of what she was saying and burst out laughing. What a ludicrous conversation, she reflected to herself.  
  
John joined in with his own chuckles. "Tell you what. If we ever get outta here and back to the Stations, I'll accept your offer. That is, if you still want me to go at that point."  
  
"You got yourself a deal," Bess answered and shook his outstretched hand to close the verbal transaction.  
  
Danziger folded his arms as he propped his feet up on their new coffee table. "Okay, my turn to ask a question. Let's suppose the Diggers hadn't changed their minds and Eden Advance made it to New Pacifica in time for the colony ship. Would you have stayed behind or left on the Jamestown?"  
  
Bess' smile disappeared as she considered the prospect. "To tell you the truth, I'm not sure. There was a time that I would have said that I was staying without a second thought. But toward the end, I was starting to have doubts about whether or not I'd be happy living in New Pacifica."  
  
John's own smile faded away. "Why?"  
  
"Morgan opened my eyes to what life might have been like here after the Jamestown arrived. Those colonists weren't like you or me. They were a bunch of pampered socialites used to sleeping on heated mattresses and being carted around in station-taxis. None of them had done a day of hard work in their whole life," she revealed with disdain.  
  
"Well, they would've had a pretty rude awakening when they got here."  
  
"Yeah. They would've been upset at the crude housing, the mud when it rains, the list goes on and on. And did you really think that they were going to be thankful to us for working our butts off to give them a safe haven for their families? Not a chance. They would've been angry that we hadn't provided them with the pristine accommodations that they were used to back on the Stations. And who do you think they would've taken out their frustrations on? They would have blamed us, pure and simple."  
  
Danziger was caught off-guard by her negative tone. "But what if the Terrians had healed their children?" he asked.  
  
"I think that they would have been grateful, at least for awhile. But I also think that most of the accolades would have fallen on Devon. After all, she brought them here. Maybe Julia would have been accepted because she grew up in the same class structure. But people like us would have been shoved aside and treated like the hired help." As she spoke, Bess could hear the words 'NOCD, Not Our Class, Dear' resonating in her head.  
  
"You're right, that could've happened," Danziger grudgingly admitted. "But, as the wife of Eden Project's government liaison, you shouldn't lump yourself in with the group of hired hands. Morgan would've been given a key position in whatever bureaucracy Adair had decided to set up for the colony. Hopefully, you would have been treated with the respect that goes with that appointment."  
  
Bess snorted loudly. "Oh, please! Being the wife of a government appointee doesn't cancel out the fact that I'm from Earth. Do you have any idea how badly I was treated back on the Stations?"  
  
"I know that it wasn't easy for you."  
  
"It was like being thrown into the lion's den! My curly hair. My southern accent. Morgan didn't mind so much because he loved me, but the others-" She stopped and shook her head resentfully. "And when we crashed, Devon treated me like a complete idiot for weeks."  
  
She imitated the former leader using a singsong tone, "'I don't mean to tell you your business, Bess.' 'We're not going to wait for the two of you again, Bess.' 'Maybe you should start treating Morgan like an adult, Bess.'"  
  
Bess threw up her hands in exasperation. "The woman didn't even think that I knew how to use a damn gear-set. And after the Terrians healed her, she was worse. You should have heard the terrible things she said to me the first day we arrived in this valley."  
  
She cocked her head to the side and challenged, "And don't try to tell me that she wasn't just as bad to you. The first month we were on the planet, half of the time she called you by the wrong name."  
  
Now, it was John's turn to let out a loud snort. "Well, 'Danzinger' was close enough that at least I knew who she was talking about," he replied with a shrug.  
  
She looked away as the animosity in her voice was replaced by discouragement. "Every time I tried to make a suggestion, Devon would shoo me away like I was keeping her from something more important. I even started speaking without my accent hoping that everyone would start taking me more seriously."  
  
John suddenly felt guilty. Really guilty. Bess had clearly had her feelings hurt by the members of Eden Advance, himself included. He exhaled before telling her honestly, "It's true that some of us didn't take you seriously at first, Bess. I can't speak for the others. I'm sure that a few of them had prejudices or just dismissed you as another pretty face. I don't want to sound cruel, but I think a lot of them treated you differently because they didn't like Morgan. But that changed, right? I mean, Morgan was never very popular, but he did get easier to live with in some ways as time went on. And I think that everyone knew that you were a good person who they could depend on."  
  
He didn't wish to disparage her husband's memory by harping on his less than stellar qualities, but John felt that it was necessary to speak frankly. "As for myself, I'll admit that I was a bit put off by you at first because I wasn't sure of your role in the taking of the escape pod. I watched you at the campfire that first night you and Morgan were with us goin' on and on about wind shear. Later, I heard that you confessed that Morgan stole the pod and you didn't figure it out until after the fact. I had no grudge against you after that. I also appreciated that you were able to forgive True after that disastrous Koba incident. You always looked out for her and that's why I didn't hesitate to ask you to take care of her when 'Lonz and I were planning to travel ahead of the group. I knew that I could trust you with the most important thing in my life."  
  
She gave him a smile of gratitude when he added, "That accent thing always did bother me a little though."  
  
Bess rolled her eyes. It was nothing unusual to be chided about her drawl. "I know. Everyone hated it."  
  
"That's not what I meant. It was really strange to me when you started talking differently. That accent is part of your heritage. You had absolutely nothing to be ashamed of." John broke into a grin as he pointed out, "And, by the way, you still have it."  
  
"No, I don't," she disputed in an incredulous voice.  
  
"Oh, yes you do. It comes out when you're tired or when you're trying to talk me into something that I don't want to do." The mechanic cleared his throat and mimicked, "'Jaaaaaahhhhhnnnn'. My name isn't supposed to have two syllables." She responded by hitting him in the head with a cushion.  
  
Once they stopped chuckling, he sincerely offered, "You should be yourself, Bess. You're from Earth. You have an accent. You have curly hair. Be proud of who you are and what you've accomplished."  
  
"Thank you. That means a lot to me." She studied him a moment before probing, "You know, you never answered your own question. Would you have gone back to the Stations after the colony ship arrived?"  
  
John averted his gaze to the fireplace. "I honestly don't know. At one point, I wanted to stay behind and try to make a life with Devon. For the first time in years, I was actually thinking about getting married and starting a family. Maybe give True and Uly a couple of brothers or sisters to pick on so they'd stop fighting with each other." His expression became somber. "But that was wishful thinking on my part."  
  
Bess decided not to mention her conversation with Devon in which she'd revealed that she didn't care for Danziger. She didn't want him to suffer any more than he already had. Instead, she concentrated on an admission from another source.  
  
"In the cavern, Yale said that Devon had been in love with you."  
  
"Bess, she was pretty clear about how she felt about me and, believe me, it wasn't love. It's just like you said. I was the hired help," he said with a twinge of hurt in his voice.  
  
The widow optimistically speculated, "But things could have changed for the better. By the time we'd reached New Pacifica, she may have come around and realized how happy you two could have been together."  
  
"I guess we'll never know," he responded with a sad smile. Although he appreciated Bess' efforts to raise his spirits, Danziger knew it didn't do any good to reflect on what might have been with Devon. She and the others were gone and the best way to honor their memories was to keep moving forward instead of looking behind. And that's just what he was going to do.  
  
__________  
  
"Ouch! Hey, Dr. DeSade, do ya' think you could go a little easier on me?" John complained through gritted teeth.  
  
The mechanic was miserable as he sat on a kitchen stool with Bess standing directly in front of him. He didn't mean to snap at her, but dammit it hurt!  
  
"Would you sit still and stop being such a baby? I'm trying to operate," Bess scolded as she carefully eased the needle through the skin of Danziger's forehead to close the open wound. For some reason, the distressed look on John's face struck her as funny and she began to giggle.  
  
"Christ, woman," his words of annoyance were betrayed by the hint of a smile. "Seems to me that you're getting way too much pleasure out of seeing me in pain."  
  
She halted her stitching and gave him a wry glance. "John, if this was for my enjoyment, I'd be sewing your mouth shut." He raised his hand and she immediately smacked it back down. "Stop fidgeting or you're going to end up looking like Frankenstein's monster."  
  
"Just try to remember that I'm a person and not a pincushion."  
  
"I'll keep that in mind," she responded over the roaring noise of the thunderstorm raging outside.  
  
Bess deftly looped the thread at the corner of the nearly two inch gash located just below his hairline. "Alrighty, I'm just tying it off like so... and cut... and we... are... done."  
  
She grabbed a mirror to show John her expert handiwork. "See? Good as new."  
  
Danziger had to admit that she'd done an impressive job of patching him up after his accident on the roof. He briefly considered telling her this, but decided that it would be more satisfying to harass her instead.  
  
"I assume you sterilized that needle."  
  
In mock anger, Bess challenged, "Hey, don't tell the surgeon how to do her job. Do I tell you how to build furniture?"  
  
"As a matter of fact, you do," he snickered as he went to his bedroom to change out of his wet and bloodstained clothing.  
  
"Come back out here when you're done. I want do put some cream on the wound so it doesn't get infected."  
  
"Nah, just bandage me up. I don't need any of that witch-doctor stuff," he called back.  
  
"Marigold leaves and sap from the aloe plant are hardly the potions of a witch-doctor, John. I'll have you know that herbal medicine is a proven science that was used for centuries on Earth," she lectured to him through his drawn curtain. "What I'm using will not only help you heal faster, it should also keep the scarring down to a minimum."  
  
"Fine. Whatever," John muttered under his breath as he rejoined her in the living room.  
  
Bess propped open the door to the adjoining greenhouse (or the 'pharmacy' as it had come to be known after she gave up on trying to figure out Julia's medical equipment) and went inside. The enclosure housed her prized herb garden and also served as her workshop to create her ointments, food seasonings and whatever else she fancied. There was a long table filled with cutting tools, empty buckets and containers in a multitude of sizes. Next to it was a shelving unit stocked with filled jars, all carefully labeled and organized by its name and various uses. She couldn't help but smile as she slid aside a jar marked 'Vehicle Paint Remover' as she searched for the desired remedy.  
  
"I honestly don't know what you were thinking going up there in the middle of a downpour like that," she mildly admonished as she began to clear a space on the counter.  
  
John leaned up against the frame of the door and replied, "I was thinking that the solar panel was loose enough to blow away if I didn't do something quick."  
  
Bess set aside a carton of homemade soap which was still in the curing stage of production and dug both hands into her hips. "Well, a solar panel doesn't do you much good if you fall off the roof and break your neck."  
  
"I didn't fall off the roof and I didn't break my neck, all right? I slipped on the wet shingles and cut myself on the corner of the panel. Jeez, it's only a scratch," he piped back as he made his way to the awaiting chair next to Bess' workstation. He had to lower his head so as not to collide with a number of dried flower bunches which dangled upside down from the ceiling.  
  
"A scratch that required eight stitches," she murmured under her breath as she gathered a roll of first-aid tape and a bandage from a nearby drawer. She wasn't angry with him, but hearing the thud of his body as it struck the roof and seeing the blood streaming from his head had given her quite a scare.  
  
Danziger continued with a smirk, "Besides, I couldn't risk losing that panel and having to suffer through every day listening to you complaining that there's no hot water for the bathtub."  
  
The Earth-res was about to remind him that she wasn't the only one who appreciated the luxury of warm bath water when a brilliant light almost immediately accompanied by crashing thunder filled their ears. Both of them jumped in surprise and Danziger was especially glad that the deafening ruckus hadn't occurred while Bess was in the middle of sewing him up.  
  
"Wow, that was close," she whispered in amazement.  
  
John nodded silently and pulled back his bangs to enable her to apply the ointment on and around the edges of his injury. Bess glanced down to see his expression and gauge if she was causing him additional pain, but he was transfixed by the droplets of summer rain running down the edges of the greenhouse's clear plastic canvas.  
  
When the sky briefly brightened and let out another reverberating rumble, she reminisced with a smile, "My father used to tell me that thunder was the sound the angels made when they were moving furniture around in Heaven."  
  
Danziger didn't respond or veer his gaze and that told her all she needed to know.  
  
"You don't believe in it, do you?" she inquired.  
  
"What? Thunder being angels with loud redecorating habits?"  
  
"Heaven."  
  
He took a deep breath. "I respect your right to believe in it," he answered softly. "But no, since you asked. I think that when your number comes up, that's it."  
  
"But how can you say that after all that we've seen here on this planet?" she challenged while taping a strip of gauze over the wound.  
  
He met her gaze and offered, "Bess, I'll admit that we've seen some pretty strange things since we've been here, but there hasn't been anything to suggest to me that there's any type of an afterlife when we die. I know you're Catholic and it's probably been drilled into you since you were a little girl that our souls go to some Utopian society and live out eternity- "  
  
"-as angels," Bess finished the sentence  
  
"Yeah, as angels. I'm sorry, but I have a hard time believing it," he shrugged. "Maybe it's just how I was raised."  
  
As Bess finished her task, Danziger used his fingers to comb some of his hair forward to partially cover the dressing. She rested her elbows on the worktable and looked skyward.  
  
"That's too bad, John, because I do believe in Heaven. I think there's a perfect place where all of our friends and family have gone to where they no longer feel sadness or pain. All of their wishes and desires are filled as rewards for being a good person and for the sacrifices they made when they were alive," she said in sincerity. "I can't begin to tell you what a great comfort it is for me to know that Morgan's soul lives on and is up there somewhere among the stars. And I know he's happy."  
  
John briefly reflected on the possibilities if such a place really existed. Maybe True finally got to meet and spend some quality time with her mother. Maybe she got her cat, too.  
  
"You think all the members of Eden Advance are floating around up there as angels, huh?"  
  
he said a bit too casually for Bess' taste.  
  
"In a manner of speaking, yes I do," she replied hesitantly, unsure if he was about to tease her about her religious beliefs.  
  
John raised his eyebrow and chortled, "So, do you think Devon has tried to overthrow Heaven yet? I mean, I can't imagine her sitting back and letting somebody else run the show. The woman was certainly ballsy enough to take on God." Hell, she often acted like she was God, he added to himself.  
  
"I think even the Almighty has His limits of what He'll put up with," Bess said laughingly.  
  
"Maybe that's the real reason for the thunder," John ventured with a twinkle in his eye. "Adair's staging a coup."  
  
As if on cue, another explosion of booming thunder filled the air causing them both to break into full blown grins.  
  
"You might be right," she agreed.  
  
Bess leaned forward onto the table and rested her chin on her palms. As she listened to the rhythmic sounds of the raindrops striking the canvas, she began to think about how far she and John had come. They had been on the planet for almost four years now; two and a half of which, it had been just the two of them completely isolated from the rest of the world. For all they knew, the colony ship had come and gone. The Terrians had taken precautions to ensure that there were no Grendlers, Kobas or creatures of any kind for them to interact with. In fact, they hadn't seen a Terrian in years.  
  
It became easier and easier to forget that she and Danziger were the final two specimens of their experiment to test humanity's viability with the planet. The fate of the human race could very well be in their hands. Yet, here they were, laughing and joking. Maybe John was right when he'd once confirmed her fears that they'd both gone a bit crazy. Or perhaps they'd accepted their fate and tried to make the best of a near impossible situation.  
  
'Always look life in the eye' her father had always said and that's exactly what Bess was trying to do. It was clear to her that John had adopted a similar philosophy, too. Each day got a little better until somehow, when they weren't looking, life had become almost normal. That is, if you call 'normal' being held prisoner and studied by unseen captors after they systematically eliminated most of your friends and family. But despite this, she and Danziger had not only survived their ordeal, they had adapted. Bess lived in a nice house. She'd learned to plant crops and had become an expert regarding the plant life of the valley which served as their jail. And she had a closer friendship with John than she'd ever had with anyone, even back on Earth.  
  
As the rains drew to a close and the sun's rays edged between the darkened clouds, Bess found herself smiling. Although this would not have been the life that her father would have chosen for her, she was certain that he would have been proud nonetheless.  
  
__________ 


	10. 10/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 10  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
Author's note: The beginning of the chapter contains a reference to landmarks found in New York City. This section of my story was written in May, 2001, several months before the horrific events of 9-11. Although the descriptions are relatively mild in nature, I still feel compelled to attach a disclaimer apologizing to anyone who might be offended by the inclusion of the material.  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
Ice skating. John Danziger could not believe that the woman had somehow talked him into ice skating. It had all started the prior winter when Bess had told him the story of her third date with Morgan in which he'd taken her to a synth-arcade. He'd arranged for their own private booth and they'd spent the entire evening in VR at a place known during the twentieth century as Rockefeller Center. She described steel buildings with windows that reflected the clear blue sky, tall golden statues and hundreds of colorful flags representing countries that had vanished long before they were born. There was even a hot dog stand that gave you extra sauerkraut if you asked nicely. And in the middle of it all was an outdoor skating rink filled with people cheerfully gliding around the ice, clueless to the death and destruction that awaited their children and children's children a few decades in the future.  
  
She and Morgan had spent the whole night skating and talking as they got to know one another better. Bess loved it so much that she'd had Morgan bring her back several more times. In fact, he had surprised her with her own personal copy of the program as a wedding gift. It was the first VR chip that she owned or ever wanted to own. Sadness had crept into her voice when she'd explained to Danziger how the program had been left behind during their frenzied escape from the Roanoke.  
  
John couldn't recreate Rockefeller Center for Bess, but he could make her a pair of ice-skates. Luckily, she wore the same shoe-size as Denner and it wasn't too difficult to fashion an additional layer of sole and a metal blade to the bottom of a pair of her boots.  
  
When he'd surprised her with the finished product, at first he thought he'd made a terrible mistake. She examined the gift like it was a fine piece of porcelain and her eyes glistened with tears. John surmised that the skates were a reminder of happier times with her husband that she'd never get to experience again.  
  
Yeah, great goin', Danziger, he sourly thought. He started to apologize when the Earth-res, skates still in hand, threw her arms around him and squeezed tightly.  
  
"They're perfect. Thank you," she quietly sobbed. "Thank you so much for this."  
  
Now John was completely confused. Didn't he just screw up? "You aren't mad?"  
  
"Why would I be mad?" she pulled back and asked, wiping away her tears of joy at the sweet gesture.  
  
"I dunno," he shrugged.  
  
Bess seated herself on a dining room chair and slid her feet into the unlaced boots. "Wow, a real pair of skates. I can't wait to try these out at the lake tomorrow."  
  
She crossed her leg to inspect the craftsmanship more closely and admiringly ran her finger along the edge of the blade. Suddenly, she looked up at him in puzzlement. "So, where's your pair?"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Well, it's no fun skating alone," she said in a persuasive tone. "You need to make yourself some skates of your own."  
  
"Oh, no, no, no," he shook his head emphatically. "There's not a chance in hell that you're gonna get me out there on that ice."  
  
Bess decided that drastic times called for drastic measures. She batted her eyelashes and drawled, "But, Jaaaaaahhhhhnnnnn-"  
  
Danziger winced and threw his hands skyward. "Shit."  
  
On days like these, John was almost glad that it was just the two of them living in the mountain range. This way, there were no witnesses to see him falling on his ass (or, as Bess so eloquently put it, possibly breaking a hip as old folks with brittle bones like him are prone to do). In actuality, by the time last winter had drawn to a close, he'd gotten much better at skating. Of course, Bess was a natural and had no trouble at all navigating the ice. She also took immense pleasure in showing him up and razzing him mercilessly about his grace or lack thereof.  
  
They went skating almost every day the weather permitted them traveling outdoors. When spring had finally arrived and Bess packed up their skates and winter clothing, Danziger was amazed to hear her mention that she was looking forward to the next frost so they could go back out on the ice.  
  
This year, an intense cold front had moved in during the late autumn. Although there was only three inches of snow on the ground, the valley had experienced two full days of sleet. Icicles dangled from the frozen leaves that still clung to the trees. Branches drooped toward the ground under the massive weight of the ice and many large limbs snapped as if they were flimsy twigs. The path leading to the lake became a winding obstacle course of downed and low-hanging branches.  
  
But Bess didn't care about any of that. She just wanted to skate.  
  
"Come on, John," she said excitedly. She was already out there reacclimatizing herself to the liberating sensation of coasting across the ice. Danziger was seated at the banks leisurely changing from his shoes to his skates.  
  
"All right. All right. I'm moving as fast as I can," he answered as he removed his gloves to lace up one of the boots. "Just watch where you're going, okay? There might be some patches where the lake hasn't frozen completely."  
  
Bess skidded to a halt in front of him and gave him her best Southern Belle look. "Why, John Henry Danziger, are you suggesting that I might be skating on thin ice?"  
  
He sat back and folded his arms in front of him. "In more ways than one," he quipped dryly.  
  
The Earth-res winked at him as she skated backward in the opposite direction. "Grouch."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Nothing. Hurry up."  
  
John couldn't help but chuckle as he watched a gleeful Bess lightly engraving figure eights into the frozen floor. It was good to see her enjoying herself so much. After watching her a few more moments, he diverted his attention back down to the ground and reinitiated tying his boot. Suddenly, he heard a powerful cracking sound and Bess scream out his name.  
  
When he looked up, she was gone.  
  
"BESS!" he yelled as he took off across the ice, one foot in a skate and the other wearing only a sock.  
  
He could see her flailing body trapped under the ice. He dove the upper part of his own frame into the hole in which she'd fallen through in an effort to grab her. However, the current was gradually pulling her to the mouth of the river and she was already too far from his grasp.  
  
"HOLD ON, BESS! HOLD ON!"  
  
It didn't take long for the cold to siphon Bess' energy from her. Her body was in shock and refused to obey her command to swim back toward the punctured ice. Her lungs burned from the lack of air and she was fighting to stay conscious. Bess also knew that she was drifting out of the alcove and toward the rapids and, once there, she wouldn't survive.  
  
Then, she heard John's muffled calls to her from above her icy tomb and she felt a renewed sense of strength grow within her.  
  
She was not going to die. John would save her. She was absolutely certain of it.  
  
Danziger ascertained the course she was traveling and sprinted about twenty yards ahead of her. He threw himself onto the ice and started desperately trying to break through with his fists and feet to no avail. He could see Bess slowly approaching his location and knew time was of the essence. He removed the skate from his foot and dug the blade into the ice with both hands. With all of his strength, he swiftly carved an 'X' deep into the floor. After discarding the shoe, John let out an animalistic roar as he drew back his right hand and punched a hole squarely through the 'X' and into the frigid waters beneath. He seized Bess firmly by the hood of her brown coat and yanked her up onto solid ground.  
  
Bess exited the water gasping for breath and Danziger turned her to her side as she furiously coughed the liquid out of her lungs.  
  
"Oh, God, Bess," he said, gripped with fear.  
  
He was about to remove her coat and replace it with his own when he realized that his clothes were soaked through as well.  
  
"J-J-J-J-John," was all she could manage through her shivers.  
  
Without hesitation, Danziger scooped her up into his arms. "It's okay, Sweetheart. Just hold on tight. I'm gonna get you back home."  
  
With Bess clutched tightly to his chest, John bolted at full blast back toward the cabin. He hurdled over fallen logs and ducked under sloping limbs. He knew that he should probably be feeling some amount of pain as the thorns and jagged protrusions from the bushes and fallen branches cut into his feet and legs. He could hear the occasional sound of his pants and jacket tearing as he ran like a bat out of hell through the forest. But the only thing that concerned him at that point was getting his friend home before it was too late to save her.  
  
After entering their cottage, he delicately set her down in front of the fireplace and hurriedly tossed in a few logs to increase the blaze. He instructed her to remove her clothing while he went into the other room to draw a bath of lukewarm water. Bess had become so disoriented, she was unable to figure out how to untie the laces of her skates. When Danziger returned, she was still completely dressed and looked up at him with confused eyes. He pulled off her shoes and jacket and carried her to the tub, depositing her fully clothed into the water.  
  
"Ow, John, it hurts. It burns," Bess cried as her body was immersed. "Please make it stop stinging."  
  
"I'm sorry, Honey, it's gonna hurt for a little while until your temperature rises. It'll get better, I promise," he tried to soothe.  
  
Danziger's own hands stung as he took off her outer clothing and checked her skin for frostbite. He noticed that the braid in Bess' hair was frozen solid and would probably snap in two if he exerted any force against it. He grabbed a large cup and began pouring water over her head and shoulders until her hair melted. A few minutes later, Bess' eyes began to shut and she slouched back against the rim of the tub.  
  
"I wanna go to sleep."  
  
He gently pulled her back up to the seated position. "Nope, not yet. You need to stay awake for now. When you stop shaking and I'm sure that you're out of danger, then you can sleep to your heart's content, okay?" She faintly nodded and John asked, "Does the water still sting as much?"  
  
"No, it's feeling better."  
  
"That's a good sign. Do you think you can drink anything? Maybe some water?"  
  
Bess let out a light chortle and mumbled through chattering teeth, "I think I drank enough water to last me a lifetime."  
  
He tried to smile as he stood up. "I'm gonna get you your thermal pajamas and your robe to change into. I'll be right back."  
  
When he returned, Danziger lifted her out of the tub and handed her the dry clothing and a towel. Bess' motor coordination was still severely impaired and she was unable to hold anything or stand on her own. Much to her embarrassment, it was necessary for John to dry her off and change her clothing. He knew how uncomfortable she was and Bess appreciated that he averted his eyes to give her as much dignity as possible.  
  
When the task was completed, he carried her into the living room and swaddled her securely in a blanket. They sat on the floor directly in front of the fireplace and Danziger cradled her in his arms until her shivers subsided. It wasn't long before she was fast asleep.  
  
It was several hours later when Bess gradually reawakened. She could no longer feel the comfort of John's arms around her nor could she hear the crackling sound of the fire nearby. She opened her eyes to find herself in her own bed buried under a pile of warm blankets. The only light in the room was the glimmer of the twin moons as they shone through the window. She turned her head slightly and noticed Danziger sitting silently in vigilance at her bedside.  
  
"John," she said softly.  
  
The mechanic sprang forward to attention. "Hi, Bess. How are you feeling?"  
  
"Not too bad," she responded. "My face feels funny though."  
  
Danziger examined the welt-like marks on her cheeks and nose. "Yeah, you have some frostbite. Not too bad a case though, all things considered." He pulled back the covers and gingerly removed her socks. "Can you wiggle your toes for me?"  
  
After she complied, he took off the gloves he'd placed on her hands to keep them warm. "How 'bout your fingers?" Bess waggled them lightly and he was pleased that the coloring of her skin was slowly returning to normal.  
  
Replacing the blankets, he determined, "Good. I'd say that you're a very lucky woman. All you might get out of this experience is a case of the sniffles."  
  
"How are you doing?" she asked as she began to inspect his disheveled appearance.  
  
"Me? Never better," he reassured. "Got a bit of frostbite on my hands and a few cuts and bruises. Nothing serious."  
  
Observing his watery eyes and flushed complexion, she noted, "You look like you might be coming down with a cold."  
  
Danziger gazed at the floor awkwardly knowing that his health had very little to do with his overall demeanor. "Yeah, maybe," he quietly replied. "Guess this means that you're gonna be force-feeding me some of that herbal swill."  
  
"Elderberry tea isn't that bad, John," she challenged with as much defiance as she could muster. Bess decided not to mention that she planned on adding some bitter tasting yarrow to the brew to counter their cold symptoms. She'd let that be a surprise for later.  
  
"Well, for now, you get to drink some broth," he said, reaching for the half-filled cup next to him.  
  
She leaned her head forward with great difficulty and could barely manage to grasp the mug. "It hurts to move."  
  
"Well, you were shaking so hard, you pulled some muscles in your neck and back. I can see the swelling in your shoulders." John gently placed one hand behind her head and steadied the cup with his other hand to help her take a few sips of the liquid. "You'll be fine after a few days bed- rest."  
  
He carefully eased Bess back onto her pillow and set the leftover broth on the neighboring dresser.  
  
As the mechanic retucked the covers around her, she inquired, "Did a Terrian come for me when I was trapped under the ice?"  
  
He shrugged, "To be honest, Bess, I didn't notice. I was kind of busy at the time."  
  
She expressed in a resolute voice, "I'll bet they didn't come. I wasn't going to die and they knew it, too." She smiled at him affectionately. "I was positive that you would save me."  
  
Danziger furrowed his brows and gave her a sideways glance. "Thanks for the vote of confidence, but I think your survival had more to do with your ability to hold your breath than anything that I did," he answered modestly. He didn't feel it necessary to argue with her about how close she had really come to dying that afternoon. And how close he had come to losing her forever.  
  
"You probably need to get some rest, too," Bess related in between yawns.  
  
"I will, but I want to stay here a bit longer if it's all the same to you," he remarked.  
  
She nodded her approval and closed her eyes. Much later, Danziger fell asleep in the chair with his head resting on the dresser.  
  
When she woke up the following morning, he was still there by her side.  
  
__________  
  
Bess was dreaming. She knew that it was a dream because it was one that she'd had almost every evening the past few months. It had started around the time of the first frost when she'd fallen through the ice and nearly perished. Now, ten weeks later, it still continued, each time with Bess venturing just a bit further along than the prior night.  
  
She would climb a steep cliff, the wind whipping through her hair as she slowly edged her way up the mesa. Those first few times, she had suffered mild abrasions as the sharp rocks nicked her skin, but, through repetition of the dream, she'd learned the route and could now endeavor upward without injury. Last week, she had reached a small plateau with a ladder which appeared to be embedded into the side of the mountain. She had considered whether or not to continue onward, afraid of where she could end up. She was also a bit nervous about the height, but the ladder would make the ascension easier and besides, she'd never fallen before. Deep down, she knew that she wasn't in any real danger.  
  
In yesterday's vision, she'd reached the very top of the mountain and, much to her dismay, her entrance was barred by a locked metal gate. How many more obstacles am I going to encounter before I get to where I'm supposed to be, she asked herself. Bess had knocked, but received no answer. She'd shaken the door, but it was sealed tightly. Moreover, the wall was too tall for her to scale over to get inside.  
  
This night, Bess believed that she had figured out the secret and knew what had to be done. She closed her eyes and focused intently on creating the instrument necessary for her to achieve her objective. She hesitantly reached into the front pocket of her khaki pants and astonishingly pulled out a small, silver key that had not been there before. Her hands quivered slightly as she inserted it into the lock and turned, unbolting the latch and sending the door wide open.  
  
The Earth-res gasped in exhilaration as she gazed upon a brilliant field of wildflowers and trees bearing blossoms of every color imaginable. She ran toward the edge of the cliff, enjoying the fragrance of the blooms and the warmth of the sun on her face. She wanted to see how far up she was and excitedly peered down into the valley below. She must have climbed even higher than she first thought because all she could see were puffy white clouds beneath her.  
  
Suddenly, she felt a presence beside her. "You probably feel like you could almost touch the Heavens, don't you, Honey?"  
  
Bess swung around and threw herself into her husband's arms. "Oh, Morgan, Sweetie, it's so good to see you," she cried.  
  
She pulled back to look at him. He was impeccably dressed in a gray suit with just a bit of shine to it. Every strand of his hair was neatly tucked into his ponytail and his pale skin was indicative of his upbringing on the Stations.  
  
She turned back to the ledge, inquiring, "Where are we? Is this New Pacifica?"  
  
Morgan smiled as a breeze whisked around and below them. The milky clouds swirled into a fine mist and then dissipated into the air allowing her to see the entire canyon. She immediately recognized it as the valley in which she inhabited. She had an overhead view of the forests and meadows, the raging river along with its alcove, the cemetery, the croplands and their cabin complete with smoke billowing from its chimney. And it was beautiful.  
  
"No," he answered. "But it is home, isn't it?"  
  
She stared at him in puzzlement. His question was obscured by her realization of something else. "I haven't dreamed about you in a while, have I?"  
  
"No, you haven't," he offered simply.  
  
Bess pulled him back into a hug, declaring, "I've missed you."  
  
"I know you do... but not as much, right?"  
  
The widow bowed her head in shame and took a step backward.  
  
"I'm sorry," she whispered.  
  
"Oh, don't be sorry, Bess," Morgan said warmly as he closed the gap between them. "You not dreaming about me all the time is a good sign. It shows that you're healing. That you're moving on."  
  
She looked up to meet his gaze. "But I don't want to move on."  
  
"You don't have a choice. None of us do. We don't get to choose the road on which we walk. We just follow the path and see where it takes us."  
  
Because those words were a bit profound to be espoused by her husband, dead or otherwise, she asked nervously, "Is-is this a Terrian dream?"  
  
"No, Bess, this is a regular dream," he assured, breaking into a grin. Morgan tapped her temple lightly with his index finger. "You're confused about some things right now and this is how your brain is trying to sort it out."  
  
"By dreaming about you?"  
  
"Yes," he answered as his arm dropped down and took her by the hand. "It's okay, Bess. You don't need my permission."  
  
"Permission for what?" she asked, still with a bit of uncertainty in her voice.  
  
Morgan began leading her through the field of sweetly perfumed flowers as he relayed, "I can't tell you what would have become of us if we'd reached New Pacifica. Maybe we would've settled down and had a boatload of kids. Maybe not. We never got the chance to find out."  
  
He stopped and turned to her. "But, Bess, I've been dead for almost five years now. It's okay to feel the way that you do."  
  
"It is?" came the stunned reply. She became somewhat alarmed that he was aware of her recent thoughts. She had to remind herself that this was only a dream and Morgan was just a creation in her mind.  
  
"Of course, Honey. You're still alive," the bureaucrat said as he caught a stray hair with his free hand and wove it back in with the others. "And for the first time in a long time, you're happy."  
  
Bess let the affirmation sink in and grappled with the intense guilt that accompanied it. How could she possibly be happy? Her husband and most of her friends were dead and she was serving a life sentence in prison. How could she feel protected and safe in a world where she was classified as the enemy because she was human? How could she spend her days gardening and swimming; watching the sunset and engaging is carefree conversation by the firelight?  
  
Oh, God help me it's true, she thought, I am happy. She could no longer deny it to anyone, including herself. Furthermore, she came to the conclusion that it was time to stop mourning. It was time to let go of the past.  
  
"Will I still dream about you sometimes?" she asked meekly.  
  
"Sure. There will always be a part of you that will care about me. It just won't hurt so much to remember."  
  
As he spoke, Bess was reminded of someone else very close to her making a similar statement regarding the loss of his companion several years before.  
  
Morgan continued, "Follow your path, Bess. You might like the journey."  
  
"So this is good-bye?" Bess could barely believe that she was saying the words. However, in her heart she knew that she was truly ready to close this chapter of her life.  
  
"Yes," he stated plainly as he enfolded her in his arms.  
  
Choking back a tear, she said, "Good-bye, Morgan."  
  
He pulled back to glance at her once more. "Good-bye, Bess." He tilted forward and, just before their lips met, he whispered, "I love you."  
  
Bess closed her eyes as they shared their final kiss. As they parted, she felt a heavy burden being lifted from her. She slowly opened her eyes to view a different man standing before her. In truth, he'd been there the whole time. He'd always supported and protected her even if it meant putting his own life at risk. He took care of her and understood her well enough to know that she needed to take care of him as well. He was the only person other than her father to tell her that being from Earth was nothing to be ashamed of. This man believed in her and accepted her completely for who she was.  
  
Bess smiled in awe at the emotions that his presence evoked within her. There was joy, security, desire and something much deeper.  
  
She reached up and gently began to caress his cheek with her fingertips. Unable to hold back any longer, she leaned in and brushed her lips across his.  
  
"I love you, too, John."  
  
Bess never had the dream, again.  
  
__________ 


	11. 11/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 11  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
Weeks went by. Bess kept silent about the dream and the revelations that came with it. She knew that everything revealed to her by her subconscious was the truth. It had taken years, but she had finally overcome her grief regarding Morgan's death and accepted the knowledge that she could happily live out her life in the valley.  
  
Moreover, she could admit to herself that she had fallen in love with John. But could she admit it to him? She had no idea how or when to approach the mechanic about her affection for him. She also suspected that he shared the same feelings for her, but couldn't be sure. There was no question that he was devoted to her. However, could his attitude be classified as love or nothing more than chivalry? Elle had been dead over a decade before he'd entertained the notion of letting another woman into his life. Devon Adair had been gone less than five years. Devon's cold rejection of him didn't negate the fact that John had loved her. Had enough time elapsed for his broken heart to heal and allow Bess access to it? Or had the loss of True, Elle and Devon shattered it beyond repair?  
  
Bess didn't know, but she was willing to wait. Perhaps in the future, an opportunity would present itself. Maybe there would be a sign of some sort that the mechanic cared for her and was ready to take their relationship to the next level. To be honest, Bess wasn't exactly certain what she was specifically looking or waiting for. But this was too important to rush into and she didn't want to push Danziger into something that he wasn't emotionally prepared for. In the meantime, she was more than happy to spend as much time as she could with her best friend whom she adored.  
  
__________  
  
Oops, guess I dozed off, Danziger thought as he woke up stretched out on the living room couch. He recalled falling asleep a couple of hours after dinner and he surmised that it was probably pretty late in the evening. As he wiped the sleep from his eyes, he tossed aside the comforter that Bess must have placed over him and sank his feet into his shoes. He called Bess' name and checked the house for her presence without success. Only then did he notice the mini-vid screen on the kitchen table bearing the message that she'd gone for a walk and not to worry.  
  
Because both of them were creatures of habit, John knew exactly where she was. Tucking a lumalight into his belt and grabbing her coat along with his own, he set out into the darkness towards the river. Sure enough, Bess was there, inspecting the tranquil scene around her.  
  
"What are you doing out here without your jacket on, Martin?" John posed as he joined her at their favorite spot at the edge of the lake.  
  
She turned and smiled. "It's pretty warm out tonight," she replied as he planted his large frame next to her on the fallen log.  
  
Danziger chuckled and muttered, "Looks like some poor Grendler made spring."  
  
They exchanged a momentary glance before Bess turned her gaze back toward the water.  
  
"You still need your jacket, though," he added, placing it loosely around her. Realizing that he'd trapped her hair, he gently eased her locks out from beneath the garment with his hand and allowed them to fall freely about her shoulders.  
  
They sat in quiet admiration of the soothing sights and sounds of the mountain range. John tossed a small twig into the now-melted water of the alcove and watched the current carry it out toward the river's rapids.  
  
After several minutes, Bess broke the silence, sighing, "Five and a half years on this planet. Sometimes it's still hard to believe, isn't it?"  
  
Danziger was fixated on the ripples of water caused by the warm breeze. His expression became bittersweet as he answered, "You can say that again."  
  
"Most of Eden Advance didn't make it through the first year."  
  
As Bess finished speaking, she felt Danziger place his hand over hers in encouragement. She didn't read anything more into the gesture than it was. They often held hands or placed their arms around each other. It helped to remind them that they weren't in this alone.  
  
He smiled warmly and offered, "Yeah, but we're still here, aren't we?"  
  
"Who would've thunk it?" Bess chuckled. "The future of humanity resting on the shoulders of an Earth-res and a migrant worker?"  
  
"Excuse me, but that's 'ex-'migrant worker, thank you very much," John teased as she lightly elbowed him in the ribs.  
  
Her amusement faded away and the widow's face became sullen. "I used to be so angry at them," she revealed.  
  
"Who? The Terrians?" he asked.  
  
"No, I mean, yes, of course I was mad at the Terrians for what they did. But I was also angry at Morgan, Devon, Walman... all of them," she divulged. "I hated them for leaving us behind to face this by ourselves."  
  
"I know what you mean," Danziger responded. "But in all fairness, Morgan wasn't given a choice in the matter. Neither was True, Uly, 'Lonz or Julia. As for the rest of them, some had accidents. Some of 'em gave up. I can't really blame them for it. Hell, if the others hadn't held me back when Devon died, I'd be gone, too."  
  
"When you were sick in the cave, you made the choice to stay behind with me."  
  
He removed his hand from hers and exhaled deeply. "I know that's what you believe, Bess, but I still don't remember it," he discounted in a mild tone. "It's entirely possible that I wasn't as sick as the others. It's probably just dumb luck that I lived and the others didn't."  
  
Although Bess knew the truth, she also knew that Danziger would never be convinced and she decided to let the subject drop.  
  
Veering the discussion back to the previous topic, she wistfully reflected, "You know what? I'm not angry any more. Now, I feel sorry for them, especially for the ones who gave up like Mazatl and Yale. It's such a shame that they didn't live long enough to appreciate all that they had." She waved her hand outward. "Look at all they're missing, John."  
  
Danziger was about to concur with her, but when they locked gazes, he found himself at a loss for words. This was something that had been happening a lot lately and he was quite troubled by it. He gave up trying to speak and instead nodded his agreement before turning away.  
  
Bess didn't divert her gaze from him which only increased the mechanic's sudden uneasiness. After a few moments of silent contemplation, she inquired, "Did you mean what you said to me after you pulled me from the ice?"  
  
Now John was breaking into a sweat. What in God's name had he let slip out in his haste to get Bess to safety?  
  
He swallowed hard and continued to stare straight ahead as he replied, "It depends. What did I say?"  
  
"You referred to this place as 'home'." Her voice was serious, but hopeful, as she asked, "Do you really feel that way? Do you consider this valley to be our home?"  
  
He redirected his attention to her and responded in complete sincerity, "Yeah, I do."  
  
Bess broke into a grin as she retook his hand in hers. "Me, too," she said. "Look around us, John. There's beauty everywhere. The new leaves budding on the trees, the sound of the water as it rushes over the rocks, the hundreds of stars above us-"  
  
As she paused to gaze at the clear night sky, Danziger observed her with great interest. He was glad to hear Bess vocalize what he'd already suspected about her recent change in attitude. These past few weeks, he'd noticed that she was different. It was subtle and someone who didn't know her as well as he did would have missed it altogether. It wasn't so much what she said or even how she acted. She was the same friendly, determined, caring person that she was before.  
  
However, when he'd previously looked into her sapphire eyes, there had always been a reflection of sadness in them. Of course, she would try to mask it with a cheerful smile, but John knew better, probably because he had often done the same thing. As time progressed, she was definitely in better spirits, but the sadness was always there to some degree. But lately when he examined her, he saw something else entirely. The sorrow was gone and, in its place, a sense of serenity was revealed in her eyes. She seemed genuinely happy for the first time in years.  
  
Now, as Bess sat with him jovially describing how thankful she was for the blessings of nature and that they'd survived long enough to appreciate it, Danziger knew that he was happy, too. And much more.  
  
"We live in a paradise, John." Bess turned back to him and declared earnestly, "I feel so incredibly lucky to be here."  
  
They stared at each other for what seemed to be an eternity. She began to lightly run her thumb over his knuckle and, although his expression remained calm, Danziger was unsure if his eyes were betraying him by revealing how truly flustered he was.  
  
"So do I," he said quietly.  
  
Then he did something that he'd sworn to himself that he would never ever do, despite how many times he'd thought about it. Ignoring the warning bells that were loudly clanging in his head, he leaned in and gently pressed his lips to hers.  
  
It was the softest of kisses. So light that Bess barely felt the touch of his mouth against her own. She closed her eyes, fully intending to return the sentiment, but John quickly pulled away before she was given the chance.  
  
"Bess, I'm so sorry. I should never have-" was all he could choke out as he staggered clumsily to his feet. Even in the darkness, she could see that Danziger's face had become a deep crimson.  
  
"I'm sorry," he whispered as he swiftly departed back to their cottage, leaving a stunned yet delighted Bess alone by the banks of the river.  
  
"Well, you said you were waiting for a sign," Bess muttered to herself, shaking her head. "Looks like you got one."  
  
She delayed her return for a few minutes before setting out for the cabin. She had a few things to work out in her mind first.  
  
  
  
John, you complete idiot! What the hell did you do that for, Danziger mentally chided himself for his impulsive action as he tore through the forest. My God, the woman tells you that she's finally come to terms with all the horrible shit that's happened to her and what do you do? You kiss her, that's what. Stupid, stupid, stupid!  
  
After reaching the front door, he stopped and rested his head against the cool wood. All that they've been through together, all of it down the crapper in one moment of weakness, John thought to himself. How could Bess ever forgive him for this? She was stuck here with him for the rest of her life. Would she still feel safe with him living in the house with her? How would she be able to trust him, again? Did he even deserve her trust? Oh God, he'd ruined everything!  
  
Feeling completely drained, Danziger entered the dwelling and stumbled to his bedroom, kicking off his shoes and removing his outer clothes as he shuffled in the dark. He collapsed into his cot and drew the covers over his head in the futile hope of blocking out the memory of his colossal blunder. No such luck.  
  
He was overtaken by an incredible sense of loss as he began to reminisce. Bess was the reason that Danziger was alive. Perhaps a better analogy would be that Bess had become Danziger's reason for living. He was positive that he would have died without Bess' unshakable compassion and support. These past years spending every day and night together, she had become the truest friend that John had ever had. Sure they'd been friends before the Terrians had incarcerated them in the valley, but the constraints of their previous lives had never allowed them the opportunity to really get to know each other.  
  
Although there was no doubt that she was attractive, Danziger had been surprised to learn that her good looks paled in comparison to the inner beauty that existed within her. She was kindhearted, intelligent, witty, tough as nails, tenacious- the descriptions went on and on in the mechanic's mind as he buried his head deeper into his pillow. They had grown up in different worlds, but their lives had been amazingly similar in so many ways. Maybe this was why they got along so well together and he could talk to her about anything... that is, anything except his growing attraction to her. She understood him better than anyone else, including Alex. And including Elle. Bess never judged him and refused to give up until he'd dealt with his grief over True and Devon's deaths.  
  
And she did something that John had never imagined in his wildest dreams would be possible again- Bess had made him smile. More than that, she'd made him laugh and the sound of her own laughter was music to Danziger's ears. They shared a similar sense of humor and teasing each other about everything from John's age to Bess' herbal concoctions made the days go by quickly and less painfully.  
  
You owe Bess everything and this is how you repay her, Danziger bashed himself. You let your personal feelings for her cloud what little common sense is left in your brain. Now it's too late and your friendship won't ever be the same.  
  
Danziger let out a dejected sigh. Bess deserves so much better than this.  
  
"John?" came the voice just outside his room.  
  
He cringed from the embarrassing prospect of having to face her and hoped to put off the confrontation as long as possible. "We'll talk in the morning, okay Bess?"  
  
"I'd like to discuss this now."  
  
Christ, this is a disaster, John thought. "It can wait until tomorrow."  
  
Bess slid the curtain open and entered, persisting, "No, it can't. We need to get this out in the open."  
  
"Perfect," he grumbled sarcastically. Danziger found that his admiration of Bess' stubbornness was fading fast.  
  
The widow followed the trail of clothing, tripping over a boot in the process as she made her way over to his bed. She situated herself next to him on his cot and reached over to turn up the lumalantern on the adjacent nightstand. Although the mechanic was facing the other direction, he could sense what she was about to do.  
  
"Leave that off," he said more gruffly than he had intended.  
  
"Fine," she appeased and allowed her eyes to adjust to the dim room lit only by the moonlight cascading through the window located behind her. She took a deep, cleansing breath and began, "John, you and I have been friends for a long time and-"  
  
She stopped mid-sentence as her resolve turned into a slight irritation. "John."  
  
Still barricaded under a blanket and staring at the opposite wall, he apprehensively asked, "What?"  
  
"Could you please just turn around. I have some things to say to you and I'd prefer not to stare at the back of your head when I do it."  
  
She heard him mutter a curse word under his breath as he ever-so- slowly turned toward her. A look of pure dread occupied Danziger's face and Bess found that she couldn't resist the edges of her mouth turning upward into a half-smile. John noticed her amused demeanor immediately.  
  
Great. Just great, he thought. Let the humiliation be complete.  
  
Bess realized what he must be thinking and clarified, "Oh, John, I'm not laughing at you." She permitted her grin to fully widen. "It's just that you have the look of someone who's about to face a firing squad."  
  
Danziger rocketed to the seated position and drew his knees up to his chest. "I deserve a firing squad, Bess."  
  
He restlessly weeded his hands through his tangled hair as he rambled, "I am so sorry for what I did out there tonight and I promise you that it'll never happen again. But I know that I can't undo the damage and this changes things for us. I'll do anything you want to try to make this right. If you want me to put doors with locks on each of our rooms, I'll do it. But that might not be enough and, if you don't feel safe with me in the house, I'll understand completely if you want me to leave."  
  
She was about to assure him that no harm had been done. Quite the opposite really. However, as he suggested alternatives to their living situation, her curiosity got the best of her and she decided to hold off on her own disclosure for a few moments. This she had to hear.  
  
"Where on earth would you go?"  
  
"For now, I can stay in the cave. At least until I can build another cabin somewhere else in the valley."  
  
She eyed him skeptically. "That's a little drastic, don't you think?"  
  
Danziger rested his arms on his knees in defeat, shrugging, "Nah, it's okay. I'll start drawing up the plans for another place to move into in the morning." He looked at her ashamedly. "But I'm probably gonna need your help. The 'Rover is no longer drivable since we used its parts for our," he corrected himself, "I mean 'your' house. I bet we can-"  
  
Bess had had enough and held up her hand to let him off the hook. "Stop," she commanded sweetly. "I think that I can honestly say that it won't be necessary for you to move into the cave or build a second cabin."  
  
John opened his mouth to speak as she added, "Or install doors with locks on them." She held his complete attention as she continued, "I trust you, John. I always have and I always will. There's nothing that you could ever say or do to change that."  
  
Bess reached up to lightly touch his arm. "And as for it never happening again." She gave him a radiant smile and the words came out slowly. "Well, I was kind of hoping that it would."  
  
His eyes went as wide as hubcaps and his raised eyebrows completely disappeared beneath his curls. Danziger sat there totally stupefied, unsure if he'd understood her correctly and praying to God that he had.  
  
Bess quickly recognized that he was not going to make a move and was slightly confused by it. This was what he wanted, wasn't it? She then remembered Devon's negative reaction to John's advances five years before. It was clear that the mechanic wasn't about to proceed forward unless he was absolutely certain that Bess felt the same way. To that end, she made sure that there was no doubt as to the meaning of her words.  
  
"Kiss me, again, John," she stated matter-of-factly.  
  
After another few moments of hesitation, John edged forward and Bess leaned in to meet him halfway, sliding her hand up his arm to the nape of his neck in an effort to discourage him from pulling back. He didn't. Their kiss deepened immediately and Danziger straightened out his legs as he drew her into a passionate embrace. Bess dug her hands into his hair as his powerful arms enclosed around her. They could hear and feel both of their racing hearts as John's lips left hers and trailed down to her slender throat. She let out a low moan and pulled his head upward to eagerly recapture his mouth.  
  
Danziger broke the kiss and hugged her tightly, thrilled but bewildered at the strange turn of events. He'd wanted to touch her this way for so long, but, to be honest, he wasn't sure of Bess' reason for being here with him. He had never been given any indication that her feelings for him ran any deeper than that of a close friendship. He'd certainly never foreseen ever having any type of intimate relationship with her. Morgan had been the first and only man in Bess' life. As far as Danziger was concerned, he was nothing like Morgan and the two had practically been enemies. How could Bess possibly feel those same emotions for him now?  
  
Perhaps she wasn't, he supposed. Maybe she was simply missing the type of companionship that only a lover could provide. But regardless of her motivation, John felt that it was time to lay all of his cards on the table.  
  
"I love you, Bess," he revealed in a breathless whisper into her ear. "You don't have to say it back to me. I don't expect you to feel the same way. I just want you to know how I feel."  
  
Bess pulled back to meet his gaze, her eyes sparkling as she treasured his words of affection. "But I do feel the same way. That's what I came in here to tell you."  
  
He tried to respond, but found that he could only answer her with a surprised stare. Bess could see by the mechanic's look of astonishment that he'd had no idea that her feelings mirrored his own. Even after spending so many years together, she was still amazed at how vulnerable, almost naive, Danziger often was whenever he was forced to address anything on a purely emotional level.  
  
"I love you, John," she said as she tenderly stroked his stubbled cheek in an unconscious mimicry of her dream several weeks before.  
  
As her declaration sank in, John broke into an elated smile which was easily matched by Bess' beaming face. With a renewed sense of confidence, he reached up and took her hand, bringing it to his lips for a gentle kiss before arching forward to eliminate the distance between them.  
  
No longer willing or able to suppress their attractions, John slid off Bess' vest and began unbuttoning her blouse while Bess' hands roamed underneath John's T-shirt, edging it upward as her fingers climbed to the base of his shoulders. Their embrace ended only long enough to remove the hindering garments and allow the touch of one's flesh against the other. They fell backward onto the bed as the last of their clothing and inhibitions were abandoned.  
  
Moving together as one entity, they took their time in their discovery of one another. The satisfaction of their own needs was surpassed only by their desire to bring pleasure to their partner. Their kisses were slow and explorative. Bold caresses accompanied tender whispers of devotion. With breathless gasps and impassioned moans, they conveyed their delight along with their body's aching cry for release. Finally no longer able to ignore the latter call, they held each other securely as the surging waves crested and crashed over them both.  
  
As their rhythmic pace gradually slowed to a halt, Danziger pulled back to get a better look at the woman whom he cherished more than life itself.  
  
"I love you so much, Bess," he whispered in a voice full of emotion.  
  
"I love you, too," she responded earnestly as the mechanic attentively traced her jawline with the backs of his fingers.  
  
A coquettish grin crossed Bess' lips which was met by John's own questioning eyes. With a girlish giggle, Bess yanked her equally anxious companion back to her and they fervently embarked on repeating the experience.  
  
__________  
  
The next week passed by quickly for the couple. Their days were filled with a contentment that neither had felt in years. Their nights were spent in John's bed with Bess returning to her own quarters only for the purpose of changing her clothes and dressing. Danziger tossed around the idea of building on an addition to the house and creating one larger bedroom for them both to share. However, Bess nixed the plan, insisting that, with a little creative reorganization of their personal possessions, everything would fit into John's room as it was. The preceding day, she had moved in her belongings and, although it was slightly cramped, neither minded in the least.  
  
Danziger awoke in the early morning hours with Bess nestled sound asleep against him, her arms and legs draped over him and her head resting comfortably on his chest. He listened to the faint whistling sounds of her snores and suppressed a chuckle, instead deciding to bend his head downward to plant a kiss on her forehead. However, as he moved a few strands of her hair out of the way, an avalanche of her curls fell forward, completely covering her delicate features.  
  
"What are you doing?" she sleepily asked as Danziger shoveled the locks backward from her face.  
  
He smirked, "Just making sure that there's an actual person under all of that hair."  
  
"You're one to talk," she teased as she reached up and flicked at his bangs.  
  
He grabbed her hand and swiftly pulled her into a kiss. As they parted, she chortled as John unsuccessfully tried to reposition his massive frame in the narrow bunk.  
  
Finally giving up, he commented, "You know, we're gonna need a bigger bed."  
  
"So build one," Bess relayed with a smile. There was a twinkle in her eye as she purposefully added, "But before you do, I want you to make me something else first."  
  
Uh-oh, he knew that look along with the sugary inflection of her voice. It was usually kept under wraps and saved for special occasions. Like when she was about to try to wrap him around her little finger.  
  
"I'm listening," Danziger said with more than a hint of skepticism.  
  
Bess pulled herself up to his eye-level and their faces were only inches apart as she relayed, "Make me a ring."  
  
John's jaw dropped open, completely dumbfounded. Whatever he was expecting, it sure as hell wasn't that.  
  
"You heard me," she continued, more than a little amused by his reaction. She had to admit that sometimes she enjoyed having the upper hand. "Make yourself one while you're at it."  
  
"Are-" he stammered in disbelief, "are you asking me to marry you?"  
  
She leaned her head in and answered him with a shower of kisses before earnestly replying, "I want to live as your wife, John."  
  
She again tilted toward him, but Danziger gingerly grabbed her by the shoulders to hold her back.  
  
"Bess, you don't want to be married to me," he expressed. "I'm cranky. I'm a slob. I curse way too much. God knows that I'm way too old for you. I'm not-"  
  
"Hey, I have bad qualities, too," she interrupted.  
  
John snorted, "Yeah, for one thing you obviously have terrible taste in husbands." She gave him a sideways glance and lightly smacked his bare chest as he continued, "Besides, there wouldn't be any Station records so it won't be a legal contract."  
  
"I don't care about the Stations. We'll be married in our eyes and in God's eyes and that's all that matters."  
  
Danziger stared at her, obviously deep in thought for a few moments before taking a breath and stating simply, "Okay."  
  
"Okay?" she asked.  
  
"Yep. You got yourself a husband," he said, breaking into a grin. He gave her a quick kiss before maneuvering himself out from under her and sitting up in bed.  
  
"Where are you going?" she queried as John threw on a pair of wrinkled pants that had been eagerly tossed to the floor the prior evening.  
  
"Just wait, all right?" he said as he darted out the door.  
  
She listened closely to the sound of the mechanic climbing the ladder leading to the loft and the subsequent displacement of a few crates. He obviously knew the exact location of what he was looking for because it wasn't long before he returned to their bedroom carrying a small cloth pouch. Bess sat up with the blanket neatly tucked under her arms as John rejoined her on the cot. He loosened the packet's bindings enough to pour out its lone cargo.  
  
Now it was Bess' turn to be surprised.  
  
"My goodness, you still have your mother's ring?" she gasped. "The one you were planning on giving Corrie?"  
  
"Uh-huh. Also tried to give it to Elle." He gave her a wink. "I guess the third time's the charm."  
  
Bess lovingly took the ordinary looking copper colored jewelry from his grasp. She noticed a faint glimmer emanating from the smooth interior of the band and squinted for a closer inspection.  
  
"Oh, there's a few tiny chips of emerald embedded into the ring," he disclosed.  
  
"Why are the emeralds on the inside?" she queried.  
  
"It was standard practice back in the Quad. If you went out in public wearing anything valuable, you wouldn't have owned it for very long. It was safer to make things like that look as plain as possible and avoid being robbed. Plus, any jewels on the outside could get caught on machinery while you're working. Either way, having a fancy ring wasn't worth dying over."  
  
Bess nodded in acknowledgment. What few heirlooms her mother had possessed had been stolen or traded away for food during a two-year famine when Bess was barely a teenager. She never had any jewelry of her own until her father had given her the pendant signifying the last wildflower on Earth. She could only imagine what he'd sacrificed in order to present her with such a meaningful and precious gift.  
  
"I love it," she proclaimed blissfully as John took her left hand and placed the ring on her finger. It was a perfect fit.  
  
"This comes with a condition," he informed her in a serious tone. "If we ever get outta here and make it to New Pacifica or back to the Stations, I want you to know that I won't hold you to this marriage."  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked in confusion.  
  
"I'm saying that I'll understand if you want your freedom," he softly stipulated. "And I'll give it to you, no questions asked."  
  
Bess' smile disappeared and she momentarily became angered by his announcement. After everything they'd been through, how could he possibly consider the notion that she would leave him the first chance she got? Did John really believe that she was with him by default because he was the only man available? Could he think that she would have ended up professing her love and sharing a bed with Baines or Cameron or one of the other Edenites if they had been the sole surviving male? How could John imagine that she was capable of such a horrible and callous act?  
  
She was about to argue the point, but stopped when she studied the mechanic's overall demeanor more closely. His face had reverted to a mask of impassivity and his body had become tense. It was if he was bracing himself for the confirmation that he truly would be dismissed from her life if greener pastures ever presented themselves. She stared deeply into his eyes where his true emotions were revealed. They were full of fear, uncertainty and, most of all, hope.  
  
She quickly reviewed the history of Danziger's prior relationships. Corinne had deceived him. Devon had expressed interest, only to later heartlessly reject him. Even Eleanor had refused his marriage proposals and had very likely hidden her pregnancy from him.  
  
Suddenly, she understood that his apprehension had nothing to do with a lack of faith in her. It was a lack of faith in himself. She felt all of her hostility melt away and be replaced by compassion and an ever deepening devotion.  
  
"John, if we made it back to civilization, would you stop loving me?"  
  
"Of course not," he blurted out without hesitation.  
  
"Then why do you think it would change how I feel about you?"  
  
He sighed heavily before stating in a hoarse voice, "I just don't want you saddled to an old fossil like me. My God, look at you, Bess. You're young. You're beautiful. You're smart as hell. You should be with someone who can give you the life you deserve. I want you to be happy."  
  
She looked at him affectionately and took his hand in hers. "You make me happy, John. You're the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. Whether it's here in these mountains or New Pacifica or back on the Stations, I'm right where I want to be."  
  
After stopping to think for a moment, she added, "Anyway, if the Terrians allowed us to leave, I don't think I'd want to. I mean, I wouldn't mind paying a visit to New Pacifica. I've always wanted to see what a real ocean looks like. But I'd come back here."  
  
Bess straightened up as she reconsidered what she'd just said. "Unless of course, you wanted to leave. If that were the case, I'd go with you," she clarified with a smile. "We're a team, right?"  
  
"Right," John nodded as he lovingly encircled his arms around her. Bess could tell by his relaxed posture that his doubts had been eased, if not erased. "I wouldn't want to leave either. We're home." He leaned in until their foreheads barely touched. "So if we get pardoned by the Diggers, you and I can vacation in New Pacifica, but we'll live out our lives here."  
  
"Deal," Bess heartily agreed before brushing her lips across his.  
  
John reclined backward and stretched out on their cot with Bess snuggled against him. As she lifted her hand to marvel her new wedding ring, John chuckled in amazement, "This isn't exactly how I figured my life would turn out."  
  
She tilted her head toward him and speculated, "I've been thinking a lot about that. You know, if the Terrians hadn't changed their minds about humans and Eden Advance had made it to the coast, there's a good chance that you and I would've still ended up together."  
  
He gave her an odd look as he gently disputed, "Bess, it's not that I don't love you, but things were so different back then. At the time, I was crazy about Devon and, of course, you were married to Morgan."  
  
"That's true, but we need to be honest with ourselves and admit that neither relationship may have worked out in the long run. I know how much you cared about Devon and I have no doubt that she had romantic feelings for you- at least those first few months before she got sick. But she changed after she was released from cold sleep. You remember how angry and bitter she was. I realize that you were trying to be patient and hoped that she would eventually snap out of it, but she certainly gave no indication that it would ever happen. I'm sorry to say this, but Devon wasn't the person you fell in love with any more."  
  
Danziger reluctantly shook his head in affirmation as Bess continued, "And as for Morgan and myself, our marriage was in trouble. We loved each other, I can't deny that. But sometimes, I would get so frustrated with him that-" She let the words trail off and sighed. "It's so hard to explain, you know? Some of the qualities that originally attracted me to him are the same ones that made me want to run in the other direction. We were just too different from each other."  
  
She rested her head on John's shoulder and they were silent for a few seconds while they remembered events that seemed to have taken place another lifetime ago.  
  
As he soothingly wove his fingers through Bess' hair, the mechanic reflected, "I'll agree that it's possible that both of us would've ended up with broken hearts. However, it's still a huge stretch to say that you and I would've fallen in love."  
  
"Why is it such a stretch? Think about it, John. You and I were friends who were getting closer every day. I know that circumstances kept us from spending much time together, but that might have changed once we realized how much we had in common. We eventually could have figured out how good we would be for each other." She added in a voice so soft that John barely heard her, "Deep down, we might have known it all along."  
  
Bess briefly flashed to the memories of their first few months planetside when her thoughts about the mechanic had placed her marriage to Morgan in jeopardy. His identity had remained a closely guarded secret and, although she'd later considered telling John, there had never seemed to be an appropriate time or reason to disclose the information. However, now that their feelings were out in the open, she'd let him know soon.  
  
"I don't know, Bess. I'm usually attracted to women that piss me off at least two or three times a day," Danziger remarked jovially. "Falling for you has been all new territory for me."  
  
"Well, if it'll make you feel more comfortable, I could start nagging more," she joked.  
  
"Don't do many any favors. You still nag plenty," John answered with a smile.  
  
"Very funny," she responded with feigned indignation. "So, you want some breakfast?" she asked as she began to squirm her way toward the edge of the cot. She let out a delighted squeal as John snaked his arms around her waist and hoisted her back to him.  
  
"Nope. How 'bout we have a big lunch, instead?"  
  
The Earth-res threw her arms around his neck and playfully asked, "Weren't you planning to run a check on the generator this morning?"  
  
"It'll keep," he declared with a gleam in his eye. "Besides, aren't we technically on our honeymoon?"  
  
Before she could answer, he drew her into a spirited embrace that led to more kisses and yet another day in which very few chores were attended to.  
  
__________  
  
...It's amazing how much has changed. John and I have been living together as husband and wife for eleven months now and I feel a sense of completeness that I've never felt before. It's so hard to put into words how much John means to me. I can't imagine my life without him in it. I don't want to imagine my life without him in it. He is my world and I know that I am his world, too. John is the reason that I am alive, physically and emotionally. We live for each other... and for our growing family...  
  
- Bess Danziger Journal Chronicles, Entry Date- Year Seven on G889 (Day 2,684)  
  
__________  
  
They weren't all that surprised when they found out that Bess was pregnant. John hadn't been on a regiment of suppressors since before True's birth and neither of them had any idea how to synthesize the inhibitors from Julia's old medical supplies. In truth, both were overjoyed to learn of their impending parenthood. Bess had always wanted children and was convinced that the baby was a blessing from God; a precious gift bestowed on them as remuneration for the hardships the two had endured and overcome the past years. John was thrilled to be given a second chance to become a father and heartily dove into the task of making their home child-safe along with converting Bess' old bedroom into a nursery.  
  
At first, the couple was nervous about the Terrian's reaction to the prospect of them bringing another human life into the world. Bess and John discussed at length the possible positive and negative responses the creatures might have to the birth and concluded that there would most likely be no counteraction. After all, the Terrians had made the promise to the surviving members of Eden Advance that, as long as they didn't attempt to escape or bring harm to the ecology of the valley, they would be allowed to live out their lives in peace and without interference. They had held to their end of the bargain so far and there was no reason to presume that a baby would change the rules that the Terrians had instituted.  
  
Bess theorized that the creatures must have considered the possibility that there would be children born to the Edenites. Maybe this was one of the many answers that they were searching for. They'd been told that several tribes of Terrians were convinced that humans would inevitably choose a path of self-destruction as a species and disappear altogether. But Bess and John had proved them wrong. Despite the many obstacles they had encountered, they'd proceeded forward, all the while respecting their environment and each other. And now the cycle of human life would continue.  
  
As excited as she was about motherhood, Bess was also frightened. Her mother had been pregnant with her fifth child when she'd miscarried during her third trimester. Because there had been no doctor or midwife scheduled to visit their district for several weeks, Bess had watched helplessly as her mother had internally bled to death. Although she couldn't wait to become a parent and was in awe at the life growing inside of her, the images of her mother's death had left an indelible scar on her psyche. John knew this and, along with Bess, was certain to take every precaution necessary to ensure that there were no complications. John studied the available medical databases to learn all he could and he doted on Bess almost to the point of annoyance.  
  
"My Lord, John, will you stop hovering over me," she'd tease in mock irritation. "I can do things myself. I'm pregnant... I'm not an invalid."  
  
John would just grin and continue to fuss over her just as much as he always had.  
  
Finally, the special day arrived. It wasn't a difficult delivery, especially considering the crude surroundings and that the child was being ushered into the world by a very nervous father. In the midst of childbirth, Bess loudly vocalized her unhappiness that the baby seemed to have inherited the large Danziger frame and was causing her quite a bit of distress as the labor progressed. She also screamed a few words that, up until that point, had only been a part of John's colorful vocabulary.  
  
But when all was said and done and John handed her their small bundle of joy, Bess forgot all about the pain and discomfort of the prior minutes. Tears of happiness poured down her face as she counted the ten tiny fingers and ten tiny toes of their perfect baby boy.  
  
Several hours later after Bess had taken a much-needed nap, John protectively stood in the doorway watching as she nursed their son in the wooden rocking chair he'd built for her.  
  
"There's still time to change your mind," Bess asserted as she gently swayed back and forth. "I still don't see the problem with naming him after you."  
  
"Sweetheart, there's only two men living here. Do you really want us both named John Danziger?" he quietly replied with a smile. "Let's stick with our original plan of naming him after your brother. Using John as his middle name is a good compromise."  
  
"Okay," she acquiesced. "Adam John Danziger it is."  
  
Bess had to admit that she loved the idea of naming her son after her youngest brother, Adam, whom she'd practically raised after her mother's sudden death. She had been closer to him than any of her other siblings and this was a wonderful way of honoring him. Plus, the name Adam had a certain Biblical exemplification that couldn't be ignored.  
  
Bess was still sore and exhausted from the rigors of childbirth and John didn't want her overexerting herself. Seeing that Adam had fallen asleep, John gingerly took him from Bess and cradled the tiny form effortlessly in the crook of his arm. He reached down with his free hand to carefully help his wife out of her chair and into the spacious bed that he'd constructed several months before. He positioned a few pillows against the wooden frame in order for her to sit up more comfortably and attentively tucked the blankets around her. He then redeposited Adam into her awaiting lap and sat next to her on the edge of the bed in wonderment. At that moment with her tired features, pale skin, tangled hair and rumpled nightgown, as she held their newborn son in her arms, Bess had never looked more beautiful in John's eyes.  
  
"He looks like a little version of you," he said, reaching to lightly stroke the few wispy brown hairs on Adam's head.  
  
"You really think so?"  
  
"Definitely," he proclaimed proudly. "He's got your eyes, your nose, your ears-"  
  
"He certainly has the Danziger jaw," she was quick to point out.  
  
"It's also a safe bet that his hair'll be curly." John grinned and rolled his eyes. "And, God knows, he's gonna be stubborn."  
  
"Just like his father," Bess jested as she matched his smile.  
  
He bent forward and gave her a quick peck before noting, "Just like his mother."  
  
John stared at the almost ideal scene in front of him and his eyes began to shine with tears when he thought about what was missing from the nearly perfect picture.  
  
"Are you okay?" she asked in concern, noticing the faraway look that had overtaken his face.  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine," he softly responded. "I just wish-" his voice faltered and he cleared his throat before starting again. "I just wish that True was here to see her little brother."  
  
Bess outstretched her hand and gently cupped his cheek. "She knows, Honey," she answered sincerely as she lovingly wiped a tear away with her thumb. "She knows."  
  
__________ 


	12. 12/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 12  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
Time seemed to fly by in the Danziger household. As Adam grew, so, too, did his parent's love for him and for each other. Although the child's facial features were unmistakably courtesy of the Klempt gene pool, other characteristics he bore were another story altogether. His initial dark brown curls were slowly becoming blonde. He was most definitely large for his age and he was already wearing Uly's old clothing by the age of five. Bess had no doubt that one day Adam would tower over her and John joked that he would eventually tower over him, too. The Danziger chromosomes certainly contributed to Adam's hearty appetite which was matched only by his hunger for learning, a trait inherited from both parents.  
  
Bess and John realized that Adam would someday be on his own with no one to count on but himself. Because of this, they began instructing him on everything from mechanics to medicinal herbs at a very young age. By the time he was taking his first steps, he was splitting his time between watching his father build or repair various appliances and observing his mother mix botanical potions in the greenhouse. Bess was able to locate several of Yale's tutoring programs and Adam absorbed the knowledge taught to him like a sponge. He was fascinated by nature and loved to go exploring. As a result, John made sure that Adam wore his wrist-lock at all times, complete with an alarm mechanism that emitted an earsplitting screech if he strayed too far toward the edge of the valley.  
  
They also taught him everything they'd learned about the planet and the inhabitants of G889. They relayed warnings of the possible existence of penal colonists and of the Council's sinister plan to control the planet. They also shared with Adam the stories of each member of Eden Advance.  
  
It was during the summer of his eighth year that Bess and John sat him down with the purpose of bringing to light the complex issue of the Terrians. Both parents tread carefully when they explained their relationship with the creatures and their integral part in the demise of their friends and family. It was a difficult situation, but they felt that it was important to be honest. At the same time, they wanted to be certain not to encourage hatred by their son toward the beings. They described the events leading up to their imprisonment including the Terrian's change of heart regarding the settlement of their planet by a species they no longer trusted. Bess and John revealed that this judgment had led to the deaths of several people in their group including Adam's older sister and was the reason why they would never be permitted to travel beyond the boundaries of the mountain range in which they resided.  
  
Adam was seated at the dining room table for over an hour listening to his parents relay the often sad tale of their initial journey and subsequent confinement.  
  
When they finished, John asked him if he had any questions and the child thoughtfully posed, "Why aren't you and Mommy mad at the Terrians after all they did?"  
  
John exhaled slowly before recounting, "I was mad for a very long time. They took away True and some of the best friends that I ever had."  
  
John reached for Bess' hand just as she was instinctively grasping for his. As their fingers interlocked, he continued, "But we can't change what occurred and it doesn't do any good to dwell on it. All it does is fill up your heart with anger and sadness. Instead, we need to look at what's ahead. The three of us are a part of something very important. This planet could be the only hope that the human race has for survival. As the last two members of Eden Advance, we have the responsibility of proving to the Terrians that humans can live in harmony with the land."  
  
Bess added, "And if what we think will happen actually happens, it will all be worth it. Our lives and the sacrifices made by the other Edenites will have meant something."  
  
"What'll happen?" Adam asked in perplexity.  
  
"When your Daddy and I go to Heaven, the experiment will be over. We believe that the Terrians will make the decision to allow humans to live on the planet."  
  
"And they'll also let you leave this mountain range. And that's exactly what you need to do," John resolutely declared. "You need to leave this place."  
  
"But where would I go?"  
  
"To New Pacifica," John answered. "We don't think that there's already a colony set up. The Terrians probably kept everyone away until they made a final determination about whether or not they want humans here. But the com-dish should still be there transmitting a signal and any ships coming into range will most likely land there."  
  
Bess tightened her grip on her husband's hand as she warned in a solemn tone, "But you need to be very careful. If you see that it's a Council ship, leave immediately before they notice you. You don't have a bio-stat chip so no one will know that you're there. Let the Terrians handle the Council and come back here until it's all over."  
  
She pushed the frightening image of her little boy on the run from government soldiers out of her mind and refocused her thoughts. "There will be others who will come to colonize this planet. People like your father and I who just want to make a better life for ourselves and our families. You must find them and tell them the stories of Eden Advance and of the other humans who came before us."  
  
John pensively disclosed, "When we first landed here, we thought that Ulysses Adair was the key to the planet. Now your Mom and I aren't positive about this, but we think that you might be the real link between the two species. It's not like the Terrians did anything to change you biologically like they did Uly. Instead, you'll play the role of a messenger. You have to make the colonists understand how important it is to work with and not against the Terrians."  
  
"And you need to make sure that the history of Earth doesn't repeat itself on G889," Bess finished.  
  
John raised his eyebrows questioningly. "It's a big responsibility. You think you can handle it?"  
  
"Yeah," Adam replied assuredly. "I won't let you down."  
  
John smiled at the self-confident response. It was amazing to him how much Adam's personality could so often resemble True's. "I know you won't, Champ. Just do your best. That's all we could ever ask."  
  
Their son's young attention span got the better of him and he energetically sprang from his chair. "Can I go out and play for awhile before dinner?"  
  
"Sure, Kiddo. Just stay close by, all right?"  
  
"Uh-huh," Adam cheerfully chirped as the front door slammed not-so- gently behind him.  
  
After a few moments of reflection, John turned to his wife and optimistically remarked, "Well, that didn't go so badly, did it?"  
  
Without meeting his gaze, Bess rose to her feet and retreated to the kitchen in silence. She could feel John's presence behind her as she clumsily grasped for a skillet located in a nearby cabinet. Her welling tears clouded her vision and she inadvertently toppled several other metal pans to the floor causing a loud clanging noise to reverberate throughout the house.  
  
Before she could bend down to pick up the displaced cookware, John gingerly took her by the shoulders and pivoted her to face him.  
  
"Sweetheart, we talked about this," he softly reassured. "Telling him was the right thing to do."  
  
Bess flung her arms around his waist and laid her head against his chest. "Oh, John," she quietly wept. "How could we toss the weight of the world onto the shoulders of an eight year old boy and expect him to carry it?"  
  
"I know, Babe, but he deserves to know the truth. Of course he doesn't understand it completely and it'll probably take a few years for it to really sink in, but he's a tough kid. He'll do just fine."  
  
John tilted her chin upward with his index finger, forcing her to make eye contact with him. "He'll be okay," he pledged to her. "We'll make sure of it."  
  
_________  
  
It was one of the shortest winters they'd encountered so far and John couldn't have been more grateful for the early thaw. As soon as it was warm enough to work outdoors, he labored tirelessly each day from sunrise until sunset on constructing an addition to their cottage. There was a lot of work to do and he knew that he was already dealing with a limited time table in which to complete the project. After all, they would soon be in need of a third bedroom.  
  
John was in the middle of nailing together the wooden frame when he heard Bess call to him from the base of the ladder he was occupying. He weeded his hands through his curls which were now cut a bit shorter and were graying around the temples. He was in his fifties now and, although his rugged features showed his maturity, his overall energy was that of a man half his age. He theorized that the vivacious spirit of his wife and son had rubbed off on him and was keeping him young on the inside. And soon there would be another little one to keep up with.  
  
The mechanic gazed down to see a steaming cup of coffee in Bess' hands and an even warmer smile on her slightly rounder face. It was amazing to him that, at thirty-nine years old, his wife looked almost exactly the same as the day she'd arrived on G889, save for a few wrinkles around her eyes and mouth and a handful of silver hairs sporadically interwoven in with her dark locks. Of course, these days she was also wearing a few extra pounds. This had required her to scrounge for larger sized clothing and her maternity wardrobe consisted mostly of Walman and Cameron's discarded apparel. However, on this particular day, she was dressed in one of Yale's shirts covered by Mazatl's blue Ops jacket.  
  
John sank his hammer into the loop of his work-belt and briskly bounded down the ladder to join her.  
  
"I thought you could use a break," Bess remarked as she slid the mug into his hand.  
  
After John thanked her, he took several healthy gulps of the brew and slowly felt his body begin to warm despite the frigid morning temperature. After greedily emptying its contents, he set the cup on the nearby rung and reached out to lovingly caress his wife's broad stomach.  
  
"Won't be too much longer now, I suppose," he said expectantly.  
  
"I certainly hope not," Bess animatedly replied. "She's been kicking up a storm all morning. If I don't go into labor in the next week or two, I think she's going to try to bust her way out."  
  
John snorted at her continued choice of pronouns. "Darlin', I don't know why you're so sure that this one's gonna be a girl."  
  
Bess gave him an enticing smile. "I just know it, that's all." She turned her eyes downward to her stomach and sweetly addressed in a higher inflection, "Now, Eben, don't you listen to Daddy. He doesn't understand the wonderful and mysterious power of women's intuition. I'll be teaching you all about that along with how to manipulate your father into getting anything you want."  
  
John just rolled his eyes and shook his head.  
  
"Come on, Mom," Adam excitedly yelled as he jumped into the ATV.  
  
John wrinkled his brow. "Where are you two off to this morning?"  
  
"Adam wants to explore the cave again," she answered as casually as possible, knowing how overly cautious her husband could be. "We'll be back by lunchtime."  
  
"Shouldn't you be taking it easy?" he urged, the concern readily evident in his tone. "Why don't you lay down for awhile and I'll take him exploring."  
  
"John, Sweetie, you're hovering, again," she lightly admonished. She wrapped her arms around him and suggested in a voice saturated with honey, "Tell you what. If you're really good, when I get back, I'll let you rub my giant, swollen feet."  
  
He gave her a crooked smile. "Gee, you promise?" he smirked, pulling her as closely to him as her large abdomen would allow.  
  
"Yep, it's a date," the Earth-res happily proclaimed, correctly sensing that she had prevailed.  
  
She gave him a brief kiss before disentangling herself from his grasp. She wanted to leave before he changed his mind. "Be back in an hour or two."  
  
"Fine, just don't wear yourself out," John capitulated, knowing that arguing the point was useless. "And take your gear," he called out to her as she made her way to the awaiting vehicle.  
  
She spun back toward him and lifted her bulging stomach to reveal the previously hidden equipment nestled in her belt. Both broke out into chuckles as she lowered her belly and the gear completely vanished again under the weighty load.  
  
"See ya', Sport," he yelled to Adam as he rescaled the ladder. "Don't let your mother do any mountain climbing this time, okay?"  
  
"Daaaaaad," his son drawled in a twanged accent reminiscent of Earth.  
  
As the ATV took off in the direction of the cave, the mechanic shook his head in wonderment. He and Bess hadn't planned on having a second child, although it was always a possibility. They still lacked the benefit of birth control and had done their best to be careful, but accidents will happen. John chortled to himself. All things considered, he was surprised that the house wasn't packed full of little 'accidents'.  
  
When Bess had gleefully announced that she was pregnant, she had also said that she was convinced that the baby was another gift from God. After thinking about it awhile, John was inclined to believe her. If there was a sibling for Adam, he wouldn't be left alone when John and Bess died. Plus, Adam would have help in spreading the word about humanity's need to respect the planet and the importance of reaching an understanding with the Terrians. After all, two voices will be louder than one.  
  
  
  
"So are you getting excited about your little sister yet?" Bess asked as she shone her lumalight on the box of old Edenite provisions that Adam was enthusiastically rummaging through. They had been exploring the crates of unneeded supplies stored in the dark cavern for about an hour and, although Bess was ready to head home, Adam showed no signs of stopping.  
  
"Uh-huh," he said absently as he set aside a few loose pieces of wiring, an old fuse box, some conduit cable and a spare battery pack, his mind barraged with ideas of the many different contraptions he could build with it. "Dad says that, when you have the baby, you're gonna scream a lot but not to be scared because you'll be okay."  
  
The Earth-res smiled as she leaned up against the long-abandoned yellow produce cart that Eden crew had once used to house their foodstuffs.  
  
Before she could reply, her son added, "Oh, and Dad also said not to be upset if you start cursing and calling him a bunch of names."  
  
She laughed as she remembered the foul language that had spilled from her lips the last time she gave birth. She inwardly rationalized that John should accept at least partial responsibility. Not just because he was the baby's father and half of the reason that she had been placed in that stressful predicament, but because nearly every profane word she'd hollered had been learned from him.  
  
"He's right on both counts," Bess replied happily.  
  
Adam began sifting through a neighboring container filled with surplus jumpers and canteens and produced a tattered holo-still of the Eden Ops crew posed in front of the Transrover. As he handed it to Bess, she stared at it in surprise having never viewed the image before. It was undoubtedly taken during their first winter in Mary's Garden because there was a spattering of snow on the ground and the Bio-dome was visible in the far corner of the photo. John was in the center with his hands shoved deep in his pockets and looking slightly uncomfortable because he hated being photographed. True was positioned in front of him, leaning on one foot with her arms folded defiantly in front of her. To their left was Denner, Magus and Walman. Bess immediately noticed that Magus and Walman were standing rather close to each other and their shoulders were almost touching. She smiled bittersweetly at the obvious attraction that the two had to each other and was glad that they had acted on their feelings before their deaths. Bess also observed that Denner was grinning from ear to ear in the picture. Perhaps Cameron had been the photographer, she surmised.  
  
To the right of the Danzigers were Mazatl and Eben. Mazatl was the only person in the photo who appeared more uneasy than John. Bess was certain that the reason for his awkward posturing was Eben's close proximity to him. She had set her head casually on his shoulder and was wearing a broad smile that rivaled Denner's.  
  
Eben. What a sweet, bubbly, funny person she was, Bess thought to herself. She had been a bundle of energy and would go out of her way to do anything for anyone. She was a true friend who deserved a lot better than she ever got. So many catastrophes had taken place during Eden Advance's first year on G889 that Eben's needless death had been lost among the other tragedies. This was the main reasoning behind Bess and John's decision to name their forthcoming daughter after her. It was the best way they could think of to honor her wonderful life and her incredible spirit.  
  
Adam noticed the melancholy look on his mother's face as she studied the photograph. "I'm sorry, Mom," he apologized. "I forgot that it makes you unhappy to come here."  
  
"No, Honey, it's all right. It was all a long time ago," Bess tried to reassure him as she tucked the holo-still into the inside pocket of her jacket. "But sometimes I still get a little sad when I think about my friends."  
  
The sullen sound of his mother's voice tugged at Adam's heart and suddenly the stories that his parents had told him of their struggles became vividly real in his mind. He gazed around the cavern and it was like he saw it for the very first time. No longer did he view the cave as a fun place to go exploring for cool gadgets or to look for neat shaped rocks. Now, he envisioned his mom and dad in the same dark and gloomy room as they tried to survive their second winter planetside. He pictured them huddled together, attempting to withstand the biting cold and their uncertain future. He could see their heartbreak, fear and helplessness after the others had died and left them to fend for themselves.  
  
The images of his parent's suffering cut into him like a knife and Adam stood up and angrily questioned, "Why does God make nice people like you and Dad hurt? It's not fair!"  
  
Bess was shocked at his abrupt outburst and quickly considered her options on how to best explain something for which there really was no complete or easy answer.  
  
As Adam began roughly tossing the small pile of items he'd gathered into his knapsack, Bess expounded, "Sometimes that's just the way life works, Sweetheart. Think about the story of Job. Even though he was a nice person, he lost his children, most of his friends and all his wealth. Then he got sick and wished he'd never been born. He couldn't figure out why he was being punished and asked God why He would cause him such horrible pain. Finally, Job figured out the answer on his own."  
  
Adam stopped his activity and turned his complete attention to his mother in order to fully digest the explanation.  
  
Bess continued, "Job realized that we shouldn't question God because He has a motive for everything that He does. Sometimes we don't figure out until much, much later why God has thrown an obstacle in our way. Sometimes we never truly understand the reason. But Job understood that he had to have faith that God would never give him more that he could handle. Job accepted his fate and, because of this, God rewarded him with more wealth than he could ever dream of and he lived a long and happy life."  
  
Adam was unconvinced by the answer and scowled in disbelief. Bess lovingly placed her arm around him as they walked toward the exit of the cave.  
  
"It's true that your dad and I have suffered many hardships in our lives. We grew up poor and uneducated. Both of us went hungry alot. We each suffered the loss of a parent and were forced to become adults at a pretty early age. Our survival depended on us making sacrifices and living by our wits."  
  
As they reached the ATV, she turned Adam toward her and asserted, "But our childhood's weren't difficult because God enjoys punishing people or because we were bad kids. Maybe God had bigger plans for us and this was His way of toughening us up so we'd be ready. Your daddy always says that things happen for a reason. I don't think that it was an accident that he and I ended up here together on G889. I believe that God meant for us to find each other. We're a lot alike because we've lived through so many of the same experiences. Plus, your father and I have a great partnership because where I have weaknesses, he has strengths and vice versa. We outlasted the others because of our support and trust in one another."  
  
Adam's continued silence spoke volumes and Bess could see the doubt reflected in his eyes. "I know that it doesn't seem fair that bad things happen to good people, but someday when you're older, you'll understand that life is a test of faith and you have to take it as it comes."  
  
As they climbed into the vehicle, Bess broke into a joyful smile. "Because I didn't lose my faith, God has rewarded me with you and your father. And pretty soon, He's going to reward me again with your little sister," she declared, patting her swelled stomach.  
  
His mother's grin was contagious and Adam could feel his negative thoughts dissolving into love for his parents and admiration for their courage to accept and forgive.  
  
They started off for home with Bess deftly maneuvering around the large puddles of water and patches of snow that still covered the ridge.  
  
Adam arched forward in his seat to inquire, "If I asked Dad about why your lives were so tough, do you think he would say the same thing you did?"  
  
Bess gave him a quick glance over her shoulder before returning her gaze to the path in front of her. "Well, I know that your dad believes in God, but he isn't quite as religious as I am. He'll probably tell you-"  
  
Her words were cut short when, without warning, Bess was engulfed by an overwhelming sense of dizziness and nausea. She found herself suddenly unable to speak or move. For a moment, she thought that she was in labor, but quickly dismissed the notion. She wasn't feeling the discomfort associated with childbirth and it certainly wouldn't impede her from performing basic functions like communicating.  
  
"Mom, what's wrong?"  
  
Bess' vision went out of focus and her son's voice now sounded more like an echo as she felt herself being pulled further and further away from consciousness. She helplessly witnessed herself slump forward and strike her forehead against the steering mechanism causing the ATV to veer sharply toward the steep cliff wall.  
  
"Mom!" cried a terrified Adam as he lunged forward in a futile attempt to grab hold of his mother and keep her from toppling out of the vehicle.  
  
Bess didn't feel any pain as the ATV forcefully slammed into the side of the mountain and she was propelled forward into the sharp protruding rocks. She didn't feel anything at all except the sensation of her soul being ripped from her body.  
  
What's happening to me, she inwardly screamed as she ferociously fought against the darkness closing in around her.  
  
No! Oh, God, no! I can't leave! I won't die! Please, John, help me! I won't go! Noooooooooooo....  
  
And then, there was nothing.  
  
  
  
Adam was dazed by the impact and found himself lying on the ground about fifteen feet from the wreckage. He moaned from the pain of several broken ribs as he inched toward his mother who was sprawled across the mangled hood of the ATV.  
  
"Mom, can you hear me?" he whimpered, fearing the worst. "Please say something."  
  
His answer was a rumbling vibration which grew louder in intensity with each passing second. He fearfully looked skyward to see a blanket of bright white snow carrying loose rocks and debris tumbling down the cliffside. There was no time and no place to run as the contents of the mountain came crashing around and on top of them.  
  
"Mommy," Adam softly muttered as he, too, was encompassed by the darkness.  
  
  
  
The booming noise of the avalanche was carried throughout the valley and John was gripped with fear when the sound reached his ears. He rushed as fast as his legs would carry him toward the direction of the caves while at the same time frantically trying to reach his wife on her gear without success.  
  
As he neared the area, he was impeded by the newly dislodged snow which covered the trail and made traveling slow and precarious. John grunted from the strain as he used every muscle in his body to swiftly press onward through the waist-high snow. He ignored the pang in his gut telling him that it was too late to save them and tried his best to think positively. After all, they hadn't been gone all that long, he rationalized to himself. It stood to reason that Bess and Adam were probably still in the midst of exploring the cave when the slide occurred and would have been out of harm's way. He tried to picture them in his mind as they waited patiently for him to arrive and dig them out. Oh, please God, let them be safe, John prayed.  
  
As he rounded the corner of a large boulder which had been displaced by the fallen snow, he stopped in alarm when he saw his child's limp form laying face down on a nearby rock.  
  
"ADAM!" John yelled as he madly dashed toward him.  
  
After reaching his son, the mechanic quickly flipped him over onto his back and let out a horrified gasp at the gruesome condition of his broken body.  
  
John was too late to save him. His little boy was already dead.  
  
There was no time to address his grief. If Adam had been caught in the avalanche, so had Bess. If she was trapped beneath the weight of the snow, John knew that time was running out to rescue her. He carefully placed his jacket over Adam's head and reinitiated the hunt for his wife.  
  
"BESS!" John bellowed at the top of his lungs. "BESS, HONEY, WHERE ARE YOU?"  
  
John was in a frenzied state and panted wildly as he scooped away armfuls of snow in his desperate quest. After several minutes of searching, he caught sight of a lone figure standing near a deep pile of snow and debris. John squinted, temporarily blinded by the sunlight reflecting off of the white ground and took off in the direction of the silhouette.  
  
"BESS!" he called out.  
  
As he approached the scene, he realized in shock that the pile of debris was the demolished remains of the ATV. Moreover, the shadowy outline positioned next to it was not his beloved wife, but an awaiting Terrian.  
  
"Oh, no, no, no, no," John mumbled incoherently.  
  
He ignored the creature and the obvious reason for its appearance and, instead, dove his hands into the drift and began insanely digging. It wasn't long before he located his spouse's battered and bloodied form wedged against the grill of the vehicle. He let out a sorrowful cry as he pulled Bess' lifeless body from the wreckage.  
  
"No," he whispered as he fell to the ground. He rested her frame against his chest and rocked back and forth, cradling her tenderly in his arms.  
  
The Terrian stepped toward the couple and John tore his eyes from his wife's corpse to meet the creature's gaze.  
  
"Don't take her," he pleaded, his voice faint and nearly monotone. "Let me bury her. Let me bury them both."  
  
The being laid a hand on John's shoulder and, if the mechanic didn't know better, he could have sworn that the Terrian was feeling sympathy for him. After letting out a quiet trill, the creature took a step backward and vanished into the ground without retrieving either body.  
  
John returned his attention to Bess. He knew that he should be angry, filled with rage at the cruel turn of events. He should be screaming in agony for the loss of his child and the woman who'd brought him more happiness than he could have ever imagined possible. But as he stroked the cold skin of his wife's cheek, he could only manage a quiet whimper.  
  
"Oh, Bess," he softly repeated over and over. "Oh, Bess..."  
  
  
  
As the day drew to a close, John carried both Bess and Adam back to the cabin. After gently laying them in their respective beds, he grabbed a shovel and headed out for the cemetery to ready two plots to serve as their final resting places. He decided to bury Adam next to True's headstone so both children could be together, despite the fact that his daughter's body had never been recovered from the Terrians. Additionally, he knew that Bess would want to be buried next to her son and made the appropriate arrangements.  
  
It was late in the evening when John dolefully returned to the cottage to begin the chore of preparing his family for internment. In complete silence, he meticulously cleaned Adam's wounds and changed him into a fresh set of clothing. Subsequently, John returned to his own bedroom to repeat the task on his wife. He bathed her, attentively sponging off the blood that had dried on her skin and washing away the thickly caked blood that had congealed into her hair. John dressed Bess in a clean outfit which barely fit due to her late state of pregnancy.  
  
After returning her to their bed, the mechanic sat in a chair next to her and lovingly took her pale hand in both of his own.  
  
"We were supposed to die together, Sweetheart," John said, leaning forward to lightly kiss her ashen lips. "It's okay. You- You sleep now," he whispered as the light in his eyes disappeared.  
  
  
  
When the sun rose the following morning, John soundlessly put his wife and son into the earth. Afterward, he returned to the cabin and rigidly sat on the edge of his bed at a complete loss as to what to do. Noticing that the prior evening's activities had created quite a mess, he began to listlessly straighten up his bedroom.  
  
As he grabbed Bess' bloodstained jacket which had been draped over the dresser, the wrinkled photo of the Eden Ops crew fell from her pocket and floated to the floor. He picked up the holo-still and curiously centered in on his own image.  
  
Everyone in that photograph is dead, John thought, shaking his head.  
  
After a moments contemplation, he woodenly marched to the fireplace and set the picture into the blazing flames.  
  
He sat there stone faced as he watched the photo burn.  
  
__________ 


	13. 13/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 13  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
Days became weeks.  
  
Danziger spent most of his time at the cemetery. It was the best way he could think of to be close to the others. He missed them all so much; especially his children. Although he had accepted True's death long ago, there would always be a void in his life that only she could fill. Adam's absence was a fresh and painful wound to his already damaged heart. John also strongly felt the loss of unborn Baby Eben. It was an ironic twist that the little girl's life had been unexpectantly extinguished before she had been given a chance to live, just like her namesake.  
  
As much as he longed for the company of his children and friends, Bess was at the center John's thoughts. Often, he'd seat himself on their favorite fallen log located along the banks of the river and reminisce about their life together. Over the years, they'd spent so much time there, sometimes conversing and sometimes just quietly admiring the scenery. It was the location where Bess had broken through to him and released him from the guilt that he'd felt over the deaths of True and the other Edenites, allowing him to finally begin the healing process. It was also the spot where John had first kissed her. Even after Adam was born, Bess and he would occasionally sneak out in the middle of the night like giddy teenagers to make love there under the stars.  
  
He would have given anything to see Bess' disarming smile one more time. To touch her beautiful face. To hear the sweet sound of her laughter and her promises of devotion and a lifetime of happiness. Every single moment, whether he was dreaming or wide awake, Danziger's heart and soul ached for her. In his mind, Bess had been his savior. She'd given him the strength to continue forward when he was wallowing in pain and self- condemnation. Her guiding light had replaced his despair with hope and encouragement. Bess had loved him, not in spite of who he was, but because of it. And he had loved her more that he'd ever thought it was possible to love someone.  
  
Oh God, John despondently thought, how am I ever going to survive without her?  
  
__________  
  
Weeks turned into months.  
  
Danziger never wept for the loss of his family nor did he speak or express emotion of any kind. In fact, he never uttered a sound. In his worst nightmares, John could never have imagined the depths of loneliness that he now suffered. The silence that saturated the valley was deafening to his ears and excruciating to his psyche. Moreover, there was nothing for him to do to pass the time. At least, nothing that Danziger remotely cared about. He didn't possess the energy to perform even the most rudimentary tasks. Occasionally, he would cut firewood to ready himself for the colder months and he was always careful to replace any resources that he took from the forest. He tried to keep the house up, but found that he lacked the inclination to do so. When appliances malfunctioned, he'd just set them aside without ever attempting to fix them. He ate when he remembered to and only enough to keep him alive.  
  
At times, the urge to end his life was almost too much for John to resist. Often when he shaved, he would stand in front of the mirror for hours with the straight razor poised in his hand. He yearned to put the blade to his skin and slide the edge horizontally across his neck to finally put an end to his torturous existence. The only thing stopping him from suicide were the thoughts of his precious Bess and her daily prayers to God begging for understanding and forgiveness for Mazatl after he'd shot himself.  
  
John was no longer sure if there was a God, but if there was a Heaven or any type of an afterlife, he was absolutely certain that Bess would be there waiting for him. After all, she'd been his angel in life; it stood to reason that she'd still be his angel when he rejoined her in death. As such, John wasn't going to risk ruining his chance of spending his next life in eternity with Bess because he'd been too much of a coward to stick it out in this one.  
  
So, instead, he waited.  
  
__________  
  
Months grew into years.  
  
John started losing track of time. Some mornings, he would sit at the dining room table and, before he realized what was happening, he would fall into a trancelike state. He had no idea how long he'd remain in that condition, but often he would regain consciousness and the fire would be nothing but embers and his coffee would be ice cold. On numerous occasions, he'd be at the graveyard staring at his wife's tombstone and, the next thing he knew, it would be nightfall. Sometimes he'd be drenched in rain or shrouded under a thick layer of snow.  
  
Eventually, the spells were causing him to miss several days at a stretch, although he couldn't really be sure. John didn't want to know exact times or dates anymore and had long ago removed his chronometer and all timepieces from the house. He began to log the days and his lapses in memory by gauging the age of a bowl of fruit kept on the kitchen counter. It became more and more common for him to fill the container with fresh produce and seemingly blink his eyes only to find the same bowl of fruit spoiled rotten.  
  
When Danziger was cognizant of his surroundings, the time moved with agonizing slowness. Because of this, he wasn't really worried about his growing mental illness. As far as he was concerned, the less he had to experience of his hellish existence, the better. In fact, he wished that the dementia would occur more often than it did. He considered it to be one of the few blessings in his life.  
  
He continued to wait, believing that the Terrians would eventually rule in favor of permitting human inhabitation of the planet and commute his sentence to time served. Even as his health continued to decline, John still felt compelled to complete the task of venturing to New Pacifica to educate future generations of colonists with the integral knowledge he'd accumulated. He also steadfastly held onto the hope that someday he would be given the opportunity to tell the tale of Eden Advance, thus ensuring that its members were not forgotten by time and circumstance.  
  
That day never came.  
  
__________  
  
Years evolved into decades.  
  
  
  
"M-M-My name is John Danziger. I'm the last s-surviving member of the group known as Eden Advance. long pause You're gonna have to be p- patient with me 'cause I haven't talked in awhile. I've spent most of my life here on G889. I'm not sure how long. I'd b-been here about sixteen years when my wife and son died. After that, I kinda lost track. I know there've been at least a couple of dozen Winters since then, but I'm not really sure. The years have taken a lot out of me and I don't remember th- things so good anymore.  
  
Anyway, if you're listening to this, you obviously found the homing beacon that I programmed to guide you here. Enclosed in this crate, you will find the p-personal gear logs of my crew. In case any are damaged, I've also made copies and they can be found in an identical container stored in the c-cave east of this location. There, you will also find general data chips about our mission and most of the Edenite's personal belongings. As for the recordings, I'm not s-sure what any of them say. I could never bring myself to listen to 'em. But I know that my wife was adamant about keeping up with her journal. However, you should know that B- Bess didn't record any gear transmissions the f-first year after we arrived in this mountain range. She went back later and filled in the missing data and you'll find it under a separate archive file. I'm sure that everything in there is complete and accurate. There were no records made after her death because there was no point to it. N-Nothing ever happened.  
  
I once thought that my son would have the job of warning humans that they must take steps to stop the destruction of this p-planet before it starts. He was also supposed to stress the importance of humans and Terrians working together. I was wrong. Not about the m-message, but about who would deliver it. pause It doesn't matter now. As the only person left, the duty falls on me. Not because the T-T-Terrians are forcing me against my will to be their spokesman, mind you, but because it's the right thing to do. I'm s-sorry that I won't be here to tell you the things you need to hear in person. I tried to stay alive for as long as I could, but I think that my time here is finally coming to an end. But th-that's okay. I'm looking forward to a long sleep.  
  
It's imperative that you listen to the recordings describing what became of our group after we crash landed here so m-many years ago. It was quite an adventure even though it lasted less than a year for most of us. Those f-first months after we met the Terrians, a lot of us were afraid. Most of us didn't trust them, myself included. Turns out that the Terrians were plenty n-nervous about us, too. They'd already been burned several t- times by humans and it was hard for 'em to believe that Eden Advance was any different from the prisoners or C-Council scientists that came before us. Neither culture understood the other enough to communicate the reassurances that we needed to hear from each other. This led to several m- misunderstandings and our relations continued to worsen, although none of us s-s-suspected how truly bad it was.  
  
It was the Terrian's distrust of us and their f-fear of humanity in general that led to the demise of several of our members and the imprisonment of the rest of us here in this v-valley. I'm not gonna go into the details of what became of us and why. Th-The journals will tell you all you need to know.  
  
P-Please don't judge either the Terrians or us too harshly. Sometimes we did the right thing. Sometimes we didn't. There were t-terrible mistakes made on both sides, but we did the best that we could with what information we had at the time. Don't retaliate against the Terrians for their part in our d-deaths. The experiment that they conducted was a learning experience for all of us. My hope is that, if they knew th-then what they know now, if they were given the chance to do it all over again, they would have acted differently. As I said, it was a horrible m-mistake; an unfortunate accident that I forgave them for years ago. I ask that you f-forgive them, too.  
  
If you haven't figured it out yet, the Terrians don't just live here; they are the planet. D-Don't ever lose sight of that. If you're gonna survive here, you need to learn their rules and respect them. I'm not s- saying that you're s-s-supposed to mindlessly do everything the Terrians tell you to. You also need to help them to understand your point of view. You have to join forces and cooperate with each other to ensure the survival of b-both species. But you m-must always remember that this planet and the Terrians are probably the last chance that humanity has.  
  
pause I must also ask a personal favor. C-Call it a final request, if you will. By now, I'm sure you've found the cemetery. Each marker bears the name of someone who died here, but, with the exception of my wife, Bess, and my son, Adam, there are no b-bodies to fill the graves. I ask that you leave them there. P-Please don't excavate their graves to perform autopsies on them. Everything you n-need to know about them is in their gear transmissions. pause P-P-Please let my f-f-family rest in peace. long pause I doubt there'll be any trace of me left, but if my body's still here, you're w-welcome to it. I won't need it any more.  
  
Listen to our stories. B-Bess always said that to repeat someone's name is to let them live again. Please let the members of Eden Advance live again by remembering us and passing along what we'd learned to the other c-colonists settling this planet now and in the future. Learn from our experiences, the g-good ones and the bad ones. We have alot to tell you, even though we'll probably be long gone by the time you f-find this valley.  
  
I can't speak for the others about the sacrifices they were forced to make. However, I can tell you that, regarding m-my own role in the Terrian's experiment, it's all been worth it. I'm positive that Bess would've said the s-same thing. That's not to say that I wish that things hadn't turned out differently. I wish th-that the others hadn't died. I w- wish that there'd been a way to keep the children safe. That's my biggest regret in all of this. long pause B-But as for me, I'd do it again in a heartbeat if it meant that the human race will be allowed to survive here on G889. My life is a small price to pay.  
  
Good luck to you all."  
  
- John Danziger Journal Chronicles, Entry Date- Unknown  
  
__________  
  
It was almost over. Danziger had completed the task of updating and programming the valley's coordinates into one of Eden Advance's old homing beacons. It had taken months of trial and error for him to finish the job; not only because of his failing ability to recollect his knowledge of electronics, but because his severely arthritic hands were now permanently positioned in an unyielding claw-like stance, making it painful and almost impossible for him to move his fingers.  
  
He'd cleaned the house from top to bottom and checked and rechecked to ensure that everything was in order. He'd also made certain that the crates of data-chips and other documentation were secure and sturdy enough to remain safe from the elements. He wasn't sure how long it would be before his homestead would be found and prayed that the discovery would be made by colonists instead of Council members or Grendlers. Although John could no longer recall what a Grendler looked like, he had the vague memory that they were large and had a penchant for thievery. He also still felt the pangs of guilt for having killed one of them, even though he couldn't remember the actual incident.  
  
After dictating a final message into his nearly empty personal journal, he locked the containers of collected information and stacked them on and around the dining room table. He then took a final inspection of every room of the cabin and drew each curtain to a close before setting off for the graveyard.  
  
It took Danziger awhile to reach his destination. His advanced age and rheumatism had long ago caused his skeleton-like frame to drastically hunch forward, slowing him considerably and requiring the aid of a crude walking stick to enable him to get around. He closed the gate to the cemetery behind him and slowly made his way to the end of the row of markers, stopping at each headstone to read the name of a treasured friend or family member. John arrived at the last tombstone which served as the final resting place of his cherished wife and seated himself on the ground. He shimmied backward until he was leaning against Bess' grave and, with as much strength as he could muster, he tossed his cane aside into the grass.  
  
As an autumn breeze whisked through his long white hair, Danziger let out a weak sigh and looked around him one last time. He took in the brilliant shades of gold and bronze found in the leaves of the surrounding trees; the shadows that the occasional clouds cast upon the earth as they gradually moved across the sky; the warm sensation of the brilliant sun as it heated his deeply wrinkled face.  
  
Yep, he thought to himself, today is a beautiful day to die. He reached behind him to lightly touch the etching of his spouse's name cut into the stone. In a strange way, he could almost feel Bess' spirit with him. He hoped that this was a good sign that they would be together again, soon.  
  
A half-smile, the first time in many years that he'd bore such an expression, graced John's lips as he took his final, shallow breath and his eyes fell shut.  
  
Almost immediately, Danziger heard a soft trill and he opened his eyes to find a Terrian standing in front of him. He easily rose to his feet next to the creature and turned to view his dead form slumped against the grave.  
  
It is time for you to leave this plane of existence. You will come with me.  
  
He rotated his gaze to address the being. "W-Will I see my family?" John asked hopefully. "Will I see B-Bess, again?"  
  
Yes. Follow me and you shall be reunited with your loved ones.  
  
A look of unimaginable relief overtook John's face as all three shapes began their descent into the ground.  
  
You have done well, John Danziger.  
  
Then, there was darkness.  
  
__________ 


	14. 14/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 14  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
Voices. Amidst the darkness, John could hear voices. So far away and yet so familiar. And they were beckoning him to join them.  
  
"Oh my God! He's regaining consciousness. Somebody hurry and get Julia!"  
  
"I knew you'd come back! I knew you'd come back to me, Daddy!"  
  
"Devon, apparently Alonzo's coming around, too. Julia said to stay with Danziger and she'll be right there."  
  
The sounds were getting closer and closer. He began to feel the sensation of something touching his hand.  
  
"True, I need you to wait outside. We don't know how your dad will, um, react when he wakes up."  
  
"But I wanna stay! It won't be like Bess. He came out of it on his own. Nobody forced him."  
  
"Honey, we're not sure what's going to happen. Cameron, could you and Denner please take True outside for a few minutes?"  
  
"John, can you hear me?"  
  
There was light. And warmth, too. Maybe Bess was right, John reflected. There really was a Heaven after all. He slowly opened his eyes to examine his surroundings and discovered that his new home perhaps wasn't so new after all.  
  
"Am I f-f-finally dead?" John managed to croak out as he attempted to focus his blurred gaze on the voice of the person sitting next to him on his cot.  
  
There was a small gasp and a moment of hesitation before an answer came.  
  
"No, John, you aren't dead. You've been in a state similar to a coma for the past few days." The woman with the strangely familiar voice began to choke on her words. "I was beginning to think that you weren't going to come out of it. You gave us all quite a scare."  
  
Suddenly, John shot up to the sitting position in his bunk, causing everyone to jump back in surprise. He uneasily surveyed where he was and who he was with. Somehow, he was back at Eden Project and surrounded by his long-dead friends. His eyes became as large as saucers when a very nervous Devon Adair reapproached him and cautiously sat next to him on his bed. She tentatively reached out to soothingly touch his arm, but Danziger pulled back and scooted as far away from her as possible, almost falling to the floor in the process. He had a look on his face that she had never seen before. It was fear.  
  
"It's okay, John. I know it's a bit confusing," Devon assured as she moved to a chair next to his cot that Walman had set out for her. "This is going to take a little time to explain. I'm not even sure where to begin." She bit her lower lip, searching for the right words to help him understand, but nothing came to mind. "We're still trying to piece together exactly what happened."  
  
Magus guardedly took a step toward him. "Hopefully, Alonzo can fill in some of the blanks now that he's back, too."  
  
John sat there in befuddled silence as he tried to figure out where he was. The place looked amazingly like his old tent from all those years ago. He recognized Devon although he couldn't remember the name of the woman with the short blond hair who stood behind her. There were others huddled around the opening of the tent who were gawking at him with a look of concern. He knew that he'd seen them before, too, but it had been so long ago.  
  
"I-I d-d-don't understand," John quietly stuttered. "Who are all y- you people?"  
  
Devon tried to use her most comforting tone as she spoke. "John, we're all part of Eden Advance. We crash-landed here about nine months ago, remember? Now, we're traveling to New Pacifica to get ready for the 248 Syndrome children and their families."  
  
John gaped at her as if he didn't understand what she was saying. He brought his hand up to run his fingers through his hair and was struck by how easily they were able to bend. Moreover, he no longer felt the painful arthritic throbbing in his hands that he had suffered from in past years. He looked to examine the swollen joints and found that they were gone along with the age spots. His eyes darted to his side and he viewed his reflection in a piece of medical equipment which had been set up to monitor his life-signs. It revealed a younger John Danziger in his mid-thirties. The same age he was when most of his fellow colonists had died.  
  
He sprang from his bed and backed away until he brushed the edge of the tent, almost knocking it down.  
  
"Why are you d-d-doing this to me? Wh-Why can't you just let me die?"  
  
The other Edenites stayed perfectly still, unsure as to what Danziger would do if they made any sudden movements. It was becoming apparent that he was not in his right mind either.  
  
Devon tried to calm him down. "It's going to be okay. We're going to help you through this."  
  
"H-Help me through this?" John muttered as he edged further away. "And j-just what is 'this'?"  
  
Devon could see how terrified he was. Not only was it written all over his face, she assumed that it was the reason for Danziger's continued stuttering. She was briefly reminded of Mary's staggered speech pattern.  
  
"Listen to me carefully, John," Devon urged. "You're safe and very much alive. You've been on the Dreamplane for the past couple of days and, apparently, there are some residual side-effects."  
  
She turned to Walman who was positioned at the tent's entrance. "Get Julia - now," she instructed, trying her best not to betray the calm demeanor she was outwardly displaying.  
  
Despite John becoming more agitated by the moment, his voice hadn't veered from a monotone. "That's impossible. I-I was only on the D- Dreamplane once and that was years ago," he nervously stammered.  
  
"No, I mean, yes, you're right. Everything that happened to you has been a part of that one trip to the Dreamplane. I know that it felt like years to you, but it was actually only a few days. It had something to do with our group being tested by the Terrians. Most of us came out of it the first hour or so. Bess woke up two mornings ago and you were the last one."  
  
"Bess?" Danziger's face became flushed and his eyes widened even more. "B-B-Bess is here?"  
  
"Yes, she is here," Yale responded warmly, trying his best to placate the mechanic. "Now, why don't you sit down and we will tell you all that we know."  
  
"No!" John's voice suddenly rose as his face became a darker shade of red. "I w-want to see Bess!" he yelled.  
  
At that moment, Alonzo burst into John's quarters with Julia close at his heels armed with a sedaderm.  
  
"I need everyone out of this tent right now," Alonzo ordered to the others. He turned his attention to his friend. "John, everything's going to be okay."  
  
"What the hell are you all t-t-talking about? I w-want everyone to stop telling me that everything's f-fine and start giving me some goddamned answers, d-do you hear me?" John was screaming now and his hands were balled into fists. "I want to see Bess! I d-demand to speak to my-"  
  
"Daddy?" came the small, scared voice of True as she peered in through the tent opening.  
  
Danziger froze in his tracks and the color completely drained from his face. He began to shake uncontrollably and sank down to the floor into a crouched position.  
  
"Oh, God. Oh, God," he began whimpering as he covered his face with his knees and hands.  
  
Denner grabbed a shocked True and led her away from the tent as quickly as possible, but the damage had already been done- to both of them.  
  
Alonzo took control of the situation before it got any more out of hand. "I want everyone out of here now!" he loudly commanded.  
  
The Edenites quietly exited Danziger's quarters and Alonzo waited until only he, Julia and Devon remained. The pilot carefully took a few paces forward and kneeled next to the frightened, huddled form.  
  
"I need you to focus on me for right now, okay John?" After a few seconds, the mechanic nodded, but refused to look up. "You remember me, right? And you remember Julia, too. I know you could never forget a pretty face like hers, right? Look, I know that this is a shock for you and you're not sure what's going on. To be honest, I'm not completely sure myself. But I'm going to get some straight answers from the Terrians. And I promise that we are going to help you."  
  
Alonzo placed his hand on John's shoulder causing him to raise his head in awe at the first physical contact he'd had in decades. "We were friends all those years ago, right? You trusted me. Well, I need you to trust me, again, for old time's sake, okay?"  
  
Too emotionally drained to speak, John could only nod his head in agreement.  
  
"All right. First, I need you to go lay back down on your cot. Julia's going to give you a mild sedative to help you sleep for awhile."  
  
Devon finally found her voice, again, and interrupted, "Hasn't he slept enough?"  
  
Alonzo ignored her question and concentrated his efforts on Danziger. He continued, "I need you to rest for a bit while I go talk with the Terrians and find out why they did this to you. Then, I'll come fill you in on everything that I learn, okay?"  
  
John nodded, but still didn't speak or move. Alonzo motioned for Julia to take the mechanic's other arm and they eased him to his feet. Danziger was in a daze as they gently ushered him back to his bed.  
  
"C-Can I please see B-Bess?" he finally stuttered out.  
  
Julia and Alonzo exchanged a wary look before the doctor answered, "She's resting right now in the med-tent. Maybe later this evening if you're both up to it."  
  
"Is s-she okay?"  
  
What a stupid question, John chastised himself. How the hell could she be okay? She's dead. You buried her body next to your nine year old son.  
  
"She's fine," Solace lied before Julia or Devon could respond. He didn't want to alarm Danziger about Bess' current situation while he was in such a delicate condition himself.  
  
John's trembling began to subside and he stretched out ramrod straight in his cot and interlocked his fingers on his chest. In Devon's eyes, Danziger's pale form and posturing resembled that of a corpse.  
  
And there was something else different about him that, at first, Devon couldn't put her finger on. She intently studied his face and finally realized what had changed. In the past, John's blue eyes had always conveyed his emotions, hidden or otherwise. But, at that moment, they projected nothing at all. They were vacant.  
  
Devon felt a shiver travel down her spine as Julia administered the sedaderm into Danziger's neck. He went to sleep without saying another word.  
  
_____  
  
When they were assured that John was out of temporary danger, Alonzo, Julia and Devon left his tent to join the others. Every member of Eden Advance, with the exception of Bess, was congregated outside anxiously awaiting news about their two comrades.  
  
After gaining their attention, Julia began, "From what I can tell, John is suffering from similar symptoms that Bess exhibited when she regained consciousness."  
  
"How can that be?" Walman queried. "We didn't use medication to pull him out of the Dreamplane. We let him come out naturally. How could he still end up like Bess?"  
  
Morgan uncomfortably diverted his gaze downward at the mention of Bess' precarious circumstance.  
  
"He's exhibiting similar symptoms, but not the same," Julia replied as she held up her hand to ward off being barraged with further questions. "I'll know more once I talk to them both again this evening when their sleep-aids wear off."  
  
Baines looked at the pilot with concern. "Hey, 'Lonz, what happened to him?" he asked, motioning toward Danziger's quarters. "Did he ever figure out that he was on the Dreamplane all of this time?"  
  
"Of course not," Mazatl bitterly interrupted before Solace could reply. "How could he possibly have known? We sure as hell didn't." He noticeably shuddered as the words left his mouth. He had been on the Dreamplane for almost four months. At least, it had felt like four months in his mind. In reality, the crewman had been unconscious in his cot for less than an hour.  
  
Not wanting to give too much away before he had more concrete answers, Alonzo agreed, "Mazatl's right. To John and the rest of you involved, what was happening around you was the only reality that you knew. You certainly had no reason to question it. You couldn't possibly have known that you had been transported to the Dreamplane."  
  
"So what finally caused him to be pulled back to our reality?" Magus questioned as Walman took her hand.  
  
Alonzo quietly revealed, "He died."  
  
Devon stepped forward and hesitantly asked, "How did he die?"  
  
Several seconds passed before the pilot looked up at his friends and uneasily responded, "Old age."  
  
There was an audible gasp from the crowd as the enormity of the situation began to sink in.  
  
"Oh, no," Denner choked out as she laid her head against Cameron's shoulder.  
  
"Oh, Daddy," True whimpered as she burst into tears. Devon kneeled down and hugged her tightly and tears began to stream down her face as well.  
  
__________  
  
As Julia and Alonzo entered the medical tent, the physician immediately went to check on her patient sleeping fitfully on the far side of the room. Despite the heavy dose of tranquilizers that coursed through her veins, Bess' face wore a distressed expression as she continued to toss and turn in her cot.  
  
Julia let out a worried sigh while she checked the Earth-res' vital signs. "We can't keep her sedated forever."  
  
"I know," Solace replied, exhibiting a troubled look that rivaled Bess'. "John'll be able to help us with her now that he's awake."  
  
She queried, "How can Danziger help? He's just as traumatized by his experience as Bess is."  
  
"They'll help each other. Trust me."  
  
Julia assisted the pilot into a neighboring bunk and asserted, "You need to tell me what's going on. I can't help them if I don't know the specifics of what they went through."  
  
"I'll tell you everything," Alonzo promised as he gave the doctor's hand a squeeze. "As soon as I get some answers of my own."  
  
Alonzo closed his eyes and entered the Dreamplane, leaving Julia to search for clues as she seated herself in front of her microscope. These past few days had been unlike any others that she had encountered since arriving on the planet. Four evenings ago, she had endured a grueling night of questioning on the Dreamscape at the hands of the Terrians. She'd done her best to answer their accusations, but was unsuccessful in convincing them of Eden Advance's selfless motives for seeking to settle G889. The inquiry had become more heated as it progressed and Julia had become fearful for her life and for the lives of several of her friends whom the Terrians had singled out as committing violations against the planet. As the inquest drew to a close, she'd mentally prepared herself for the worst, truly believing that the Terrians were about to punish her. Instead, she was amazed to awaken in her own bed still curled up next to Alonzo. His eyes shot open at the same time and it was obvious by his expression that he'd also been subjected to a cross-examination by the creatures.  
  
Before either of them had time to speak, they'd heard the emotional cries of Devon loudly emanating from several tents away. Thinking that their leader was in pain, Julia had hurriedly grabbed her medical bag and they'd both quickly dashed to her quarters. They were surprised to find a healthy Devon sitting on the ground with her arms clasped tightly around a wide-awake Uly, shedding loud tears of joy that her little boy was alive and well.  
  
When they finally pried her apart from her son and calmed her down enough for her to communicate, she described a tale of mayhem, beginning with her questioning inside the sunstone filled cavern and climaxing with what Devon had believed to be her own horrible death. She related that, as she was about to be pulled into the earth, a Terrian guide had appeared to her and beckoned her to follow him. Believing that her situation was hopeless, Devon allowed herself to be willingly led from her shell and, before she knew what had occurred, she awoke in the safety of her own cot.  
  
Suddenly, they were interrupted by the alarmed yells of both Morgan and True as they unsuccessfully attempted to rouse their family members. As the four Edenites scurried out of the Adair tent and rushed toward the frightened pleas for help, they immediately noticed that no other crew members had emerged from their quarters to investigate the source of the commotion. Julia reached the Danziger tent first and had hastily scanned John's vital signs, finding no medical reason for his unconscious state. The identical circumstance was true for Bess when the physician had checked her status. She hurried to the quarters of the other Advancers and was shocked to find each one still in their bunks, powerfully held in the grip of a deep and unstirring slumber.  
  
Only then, did they hear the trills of a single Terrian who had sprouted upward from the ground in the center of their campsite. Alonzo immediately recognized him as the same creature who, days before on the Dreamplane, had instructed the members of Eden Advance to stay within the valley. This time, he bore a new message which Solace and Uly translated to the others. He explained that the sleeping colonists were in the midst of being tested on the Dreamscape and, until the examination was concluded, there was to be no interference by the remaining Edenites. The Terrian refused to cease the experiment nor would he elaborate on any details beyond what had been told to Devon during her short time spent living in the alternate reality. To ensure that no danger was befalling his crew, Solace demanded that he be given access to the Dreamplane to view the test himself.  
  
A few minutes after the pilot had self-administered a sedative to enter the Dreamplane, Baines, Magus and Walman simultaneously regained consciousness. All three were panic-stricken and very confused. Less than a minute later, Mazatl awoke and was more agitated than the colonists had ever seen the normally quiet man. Denner, Cameron and Yale came to a short time later and they sorrowfully shared the stories of the last few months of their lives and the despair and illness that had ultimately brought about their demise.  
  
There was nothing to be done but wait for Bess and Danziger to regain consciousness and for Solace to return with a more complete picture of how and why the Edenites had been deceived. As the hours passed that first terrible day, it was clear that every participant in the Terrian's experiment had been irrevocably altered by their experience. All of them were relieved to be alive, but there was a mixture of emotions as each reacted to the realization that part of their lives had been nothing but a dream. It seemed that, the longer they had been on the Dreamplane, the more depressed they awoke. All were showing acute signs of post-traumatic stress. Some were bitter and verbally lashed out at the Terrians and those members not chosen to participate. Each of them admitted to feeling older and were slow to recognize that many of their memories were false. It was an overwhelming situation that many of the colonists were not mentally equipped to handle.  
  
As the experiment began its second day, the crew grew more and more concerned about Bess and Danziger's continued unconsciousness. Most weren't surprised that they would be the final two to awaken due to their innate survival skills. Notwithstanding, it was the length of time that worried the group, most especially Morgan and Devon. They feared that something had gone terribly wrong and perhaps Bess and John were trapped, unable to leave the Dreamplane of their own accord. Both intensely lobbied for Julia to bring them out of the Dreamscape by injecting a mild dose of stimulants into their systems to revive them. Without Alonzo to confer with and feeling more helpless with each passing hour, Julia's resistance to the idea gradually weakened and she finally reluctantly agreed to administer the medication.  
  
However, after consulting with Uly, True had adamantly refused to allow the doctor to perform the task on her father. Showing an unwavering tenacity that would have made the elder Danziger beam with pride, she stood up to the adults, telling them that because she was the next of kin, she was entitled to make all decisions pertaining to her dad's treatment. True insisted that they wait for him to come out of the Dreamplane on his own. The children also tried to persuade Morgan to allow Bess the same consideration, but their appeals for patience fell upon deaf ears.  
  
The dosage of the injection was extremely small and it took several minutes to work its way through Bess' bloodstream. When she finally awoke, Morgan and Julia realized that they'd made a grave error in judgment. Bess was in a hysterical state, wildly flailing her arms and legs while she screamed incoherently at the top of her lungs. She was so uncontrollable that it was necessary for Julia to sedate her in order to keep her from harming herself.  
  
When the sedative had begun to wear off later that evening, Bess awoke in a slightly less menacing frame of mind. However, she was still inconsolable, mournfully whimpering John's name over and over and desperately begging for him to help her. A guilt-ridden Morgan sat at her bedside and attempted to calm her by taking her hand in one of his own while the other hand brushed the tangled hair back from her face. When Bess set her eyes on her long-believed deceased spouse, she let out a bloodcurdling shriek and immediately fainted from the shock.  
  
It was then that the decision was made to move Bess from her quarters into the med-tent where Julia could keep a watchful eye on her. The others, including Morgan, were barred from visiting the Earth-res who would remain heavily sedated, at least until Alonzo or Danziger regained consciousness. Everyone optimistically kept their fingers crossed that one or both of them would know how to help their injured friend.  
  
Of course, it was now painfully clear that Danziger wasn't in much better shape than Bess. Julia wasn't a trained psychologist and was at a loss as to what to do to treat Bess and John, not to mention many of the others who were now suffering from bouts of despondency to a lesser degree. Broken bones and winter colds she could handle. But the treatment of the subconscious mind confounded the doctor. More than that, it frightened her more than she was willing to admit. At this point, all of Julia's hopes for the restoration of her friends' health rested upon Alonzo and the Terrians, the very creatures who had created the problem in the first place.  
  
__________  
  
Solace anxiously entered the Dreamplane. However, it was not the Dreamplane that resembled the current Eden Project campsite where many of his friends had been unknowingly tricked into living a lie. This was the Dreamplane that Solace had become accustomed to over the past nine months. As the heatless sun beat down over the stark desert sands, three Terrians emerged from the ground to answer the pilot's angry call.  
  
He didn't wait for them to speak. "How could you do that to them?" Alonzo challenged with fury in his dark eyes. "Do you have any idea what you've done?"  
  
The Terrians cocked their heads to the side as they struggled to understand the emotional outburst of the Dreamer.  
  
We have done nothing, but ensure the safety of the Mother.  
  
"What are you talking about?" Solace irately asked as he furiously marched up to the awaiting trio.  
  
The members of Eden Advance were brought to this mountain range to answer questions pertaining to your species. We also wanted to obtain explanations for specific actions committed by several members of your group. As we have explained to you previously, many of your answers were inadequate and often led to additional confusion about humanity's viability with the planet. Thus, we were unable to make a final determination.  
  
"So you decided to test us."  
  
Yes. The creation of an alternate, but identical reality on our Dreamplane was the most prudent solution to gather the necessary information. This experiment was unlike any other performed by our collective and it required the efforts of every tribe. Only through observation could we be certain that your group of humans will truly act in the best interest of the Mother. That you can live peacefully, despite your natural tendency toward aggression. That you can work together as one, even though you think with individuals minds. That your group possesses the instinct for survival, even though others before you have self-destructed.  
  
Alonzo was so enraged that he swore that he could feel his blood starting to boil. "But you had no right! My God, you let my friends believe that you'd murdered part of our crew, including the children!"  
  
We never stated that any death sentences were carried out as punishment for past misdeeds.  
  
"But you implied it!" the pilot challenged. "What were they supposed to think, huh? You interrogate the entire group all night long about the crimes of humanity and then threaten us with a bunch of talk about retribution. Afterward, they wake up to find some of us missing. Then, you're up on the hill telling them that we're gone and we're not coming back and, oh by the way, you're now our prisoner. Of course, they thought that you'd killed us!"  
  
It was not our intention to mislead. However, by divulging your whereabouts, the knowledge that the others had been transported to the Dreamscape would also have been disclosed. It was imperative that the human specimens believe that they were conscious or the experiment would have been ineffectual. We did not interfere unless the participants attempted to venture beyond the boundaries of the simulated mountain range. Even with the harnessed energy of every tribe, we were presented with limitations and were hesitant about our ability to accurately recreate an area larger than a few miles. This was the reasoning for disallowing your group to leave or acquire information about the surrounding region. Any specimen that endeavored to do so was removed from the Dreamplane before that information could be obtained. We could not risk them discovering their true location and compromising the integrity of the examination. Everything must have appeared to be real in order for them to respond authentically to their environment. We even took steps to enable them the ability to dream in a world that was itself already a dream.  
  
Raising his voice to an even higher volume, he yelled, "This is unbelievable! Don't you see the damage that you've caused?"  
  
The Terrians were obviously perplexed. But there has been no damage caused. Everything has been returned to the way it was before.  
  
"Are you blind? My friends are in pain!" he opposed.  
  
We do not understand. Precise measures were taken to guarantee that no subjects were harmed. Your healer was not chosen because her medical expertise would be better served if she remained awake. The human children were excluded because of their youth. It was also likely that the Link would have been aware that he had been transported to our Dreamscape. This was also true in your case. We could not have allowed your knowledge of the Dreamplane to jeopardize our important venture. However, we did allow you to act as an observer to our test.  
  
Alonzo's stomach turned in disgust at his own role as a reluctant witness to the mammoth hoax perpetrated by the beings. He had been permitted to view the examination on the Dreamscape, but could not interfere or put a halt to the proceedings; nor could any of the subjects know of his presence. He was everywhere yet nowhere at the same time as he watched the events unfold at an advanced speed before him. Days would go by in seconds, years would occur in hours as his friends lived out their lives in a world that, unbeknownst to them, didn't really exist. The Terrians endowed him the ability to decipher and process all of the information at once as they did. Not only could Alonzo see and hear the activities of each Edenite, he was given access to their most personal thoughts, no matter how deeply they were buried. He certainly didn't intend to eavesdrop on the very private feelings of his companions, but had been given no choice and was powerless to stop it. Solace tried to rationalize it in his own mind as a necessary evil in order for him to have a complete picture of what they were truly dealing with.  
  
Alonzo noticed that one person had been left out of the creatures' synopsis. "What about Morgan? Why didn't you use him?" Alonzo probed crisply.  
  
As much as we had hoped to study the long-term actions of subject Morgan Martin, he was deemed too sensitive and excitable to take part. However, the human Bess Martin had been blameworthy of many of the same offenses. Consequently, it was decided that her inclusion in the experiment would be sufficient.  
  
The pilot heatedly folded his arms in front of him at the mention of his friend's name. "Let's talk about Bess for a minute. She and John started a family for Christ's sake! Neither of them had any idea that their son was nothing but an illusion in their minds."  
  
The child was not a complete illusion. If she and the subject John Danziger had indeed conceived an offspring in their true reality, the result would have been identical to the son produced in the Dreamscape.  
  
"But what would have happened to Adam if he had outlived his parents on the Dreamplane?"  
  
Alonzo was afraid that he already knew the answer and his queasiness increased at the Terrian's clinical response.  
  
After the death of the final member of Eden Advance, the experiment would be complete and the child's presence no longer necessary.  
  
Solace turned and walked a few steps away from the creatures. This line of questioning wasn't accomplishing anything except making him angrier and more frustrated than he could ever remember being. He took several deep breaths in an effort to calm himself before he posed his next query.  
  
"So now that Danziger's awake the test is over, right? Can you at least tell me if we passed?"  
  
Although we were displeased by the conduct of many of the participants, the final two specimens were respectful of the Mother and affirmed to us that humans can live for many years and still coexist peacefully with the earth. We were satisfied with the outcome of the examination and, therefore, human habitation will be permitted.  
  
"And if we'd failed?" he asked.  
  
We would have disallowed your settlement of the planet. All threats to the Mother would be eliminated...  
  
Alonzo shuddered to think about how close his group had come to being rejected by the planet. He knew that he should be feeling some sort of relief. However, at that moment, all he could manage was an overwhelming sense of revulsion at the manipulative way the Terrians went about arriving at their monumental decision. It was a hollow victory, at best. He was only half-listening as the Terrians began to explain the many perks of receiving their golden seal of approval.  
  
"Well, that's just great," he cynically proclaimed. "So what are we supposed to do now?"  
  
You will proceed to New Pacifica.  
  
"Just like that, huh?" Solace scoffed. "You forced my crew to become part of some living, breathing science project. You duped them into thinking that they're prisoners; destined to serve a life sentence for the unpardonable crime of being human. You sat back and watched them suffer, all the while knowing that you could have stopped it at any time. You let several of my friends become so depressed that they couldn't go on any longer. One of them actually blew his brains out on the Dreamplane!"  
  
He began to pace back and forth in front of the creatures as he continued, "Every one of them has been changed, mostly for the worse. Bess and John are so distraught that we've had to sedate them. You can't possibly expect us to just pull up our stakes and go on our merry way after you deceived us like this!"  
  
We still do not understand. There were no injuries suffered by the members of Eden Advance with the exception of Bess Martin. While it is correct that her state of mind has been impaired, your group must assume responsibility for this and not our collective.  
  
The Terrians refusal to admit to their own culpability for the psychological damage inflicted on his friends was more than enough to provoke Solace to lose what little composure he'd maintained to that point.  
  
"But it was you who set the wheels in motion that caused her to suffer a nervous breakdown!" he hollered as he furiously pointed at them. "Now, I want you to tell me how I'm supposed to help Bess and the others deal with the pain that you put them through!"  
  
We are unsure as to what you are asking of us. Everything has been returned to the way it was before. You may now leave this valley and continue your journey to New Pacifica.  
  
Realizing that their conversation was going around in circles, it became clear to Alonzo that nothing was going to be accomplished by demanding the Terrian's help. All he knew was that the group that had become a second family to him was in deep trouble. And, although it was their fault, the Terrians didn't seem to care.  
  
He let out an embittered snort. "You know what? Right now I could care less about New Pacifica or you or your shanking experiment! As far as I'm concerned, you can all go to hell!"  
  
__________  
  
Julia was busy combing over samples of Danziger's DNA when she looked up from her slides and noticed that Bess' eyelids were beginning to flutter. The physician quickly fumbled for a tranquilizer from the capsule tray and inserted it into her sedigun. She placed the apparatus to the side of Bess' neck and was about to inject the medicine when the Earth-res slowly opened her eyes and looked up at Julia with a childlike innocence.  
  
"Hello," Bess said sweetly.  
  
Staying perfectly still, Julia schooled her features into a small smile hoping to appear as non-threatening as possible. "Hello, Bess. How are you feeling?"  
  
"Tired. I'm sort of tired right now," she sleepily answered as she matched the doctor's expression.  
  
Julia slowly removed the nonadministered sedaderm from Bess' throat and set it on a side table. She placed the Diaglove on her hand, making sure to note the proximity of the arm and leg restraints in case Bess became combative.  
  
The doctor scanned her vital statistics and tried not to show her concern when viewing the Diaglove's readings. "Are you in any pain?"  
  
"I have a headache. I feel a little groggy, too." She softly added, "But don't worry about me. I'm just fine."  
  
Bess surveyed her location and was confused as to how she'd ended up laying in a rickety cot in a large orange tent. Where exactly was she, anyway?  
  
"Um, did you rescue me?" she asked as she rubbed her throbbing temples.  
  
Having no idea what Bess had gone through or what she remembered about her experiences, Julia didn't want to respond with anything that might unnerve her further. It was apparent that she didn't recognize Julia and, at that moment, telling Bess the truth about her life on the Dreamplane would most likely have had a negative impact.  
  
The physician nervously cleared her throat and carefully chose her words. "I guess you could say that, Bess."  
  
The Earth-res excitedly sat up in bed, nearly causing Julia to jump out of her skin in surprise.  
  
"Oh my goodness, John was right!" she happily proclaimed. "He said that if we could prove to the Terrians that humans weren't a threat, they'd allow settlement of the planet and we would be pardoned."  
  
Julia wanted to keep her as relaxed as possible and calmly began, "Bess, I-"  
  
"-and the fact that you're here means that we passed the test! Oh, thank God, after fifteen years, we're free."  
  
Julia's mouth dropped open in disbelief at Bess' revelation that she had been on the Dreamplane for what she had thought to be fifteen years of her life. It also hadn't escaped her notice that Bess was speaking with a southern drawl.  
  
The doctor stared at her in astonishment as Bess cheerfully continued, "I have so many things to ask you. I don't remember how I got here. Where exactly are we? Are we still in the valley or did the Terrians transport us to New Pacifica? Are there many people with you? How long have you been here on G889? Are there Syndrome children in your group? If there are, the Terrians can help them. We'll explain everything."  
  
Tears of elation filled her innocent blue eyes as she caught her breath. "I'm sorry that I'm rambling so much. I'm just so excited to see you. By the way, where is John?"  
  
"He's sleeping a few tents away," the physician disclosed, hoping that she wouldn't be pressed for more information. "I'm sure you'll see him very soon."  
  
Bess couldn't help but let out a small chuckle. "Leave it to John to catch up on his beauty sleep as soon as we get rescued," she joked with an affectionate smile. "So you've already met him, huh?"  
  
"Yes, I have," Julia said neutrally.  
  
"Well, neither of us are used to being around strangers, so I'm sure that he didn't talk to you very much. But, trust me, as soon as he feels more comfortable, you probably won't be able to get him to shut up. The man's a chatterbox."  
  
Julia cocked her head back at the unusual description of the mechanic. Over these past months, she'd heard John called many things, but a chatterbox certainly wasn't one of them. He'd often wear a look of pain if he had to speak more than two sentences at a time.  
  
"And, of course, Adam is a chip off of the old block," Bess warmly added.  
  
Julia's eyes went wide. "Adam?"  
  
Bess' smile vanished as she noticed the doctor's look of confusion. "Adam is with John, right?"  
  
Julia's continued silence caused a panic to grow within Bess. She instinctively reached her hand downward to caress her once-bulging stomach and, to her horror, felt nothing but emptiness.  
  
"There's something very wrong here. I'm not feeling the baby anymore. And where is Adam?"  
  
Julia knew that she was losing control of the situation fast, but had no idea what to do. "Adam? Baby?" she staggered. "Bess, I'm not sure who you mean."  
  
Bess could feel her world careening out of control. She abruptly flashed to the memory of leaving the cave with Adam and heading for home in the ATV. She recalled that she suddenly couldn't speak or move. She remembered the vehicle heading toward the side of the mountain. They were going to crash right into it. Then, she was lost in that terrifying darkness. Oh God, what had happened?  
  
"I need to see my husband!" Bess beseeched in a distressed voice. "Will you get him for me?"  
  
"I don't think that it's a good idea to leave you alone right now. Maybe a bit later when you're feeling better."  
  
"Please! I really need to see him," the Earth-res implored as she kicked off her blanket and threw her legs over the side of the bed. "If you won't get him then I'll go find him myself."  
  
"Okay, okay," Julia reluctantly agreed in an effort to keep the debate from turning into a physical altercation. She eyed the restraints out of the corner of her eye. "I'm sure that Morgan is pretty close by anyway."  
  
Bess' eyebrows shot upward. "What on earth are you talking about? Morgan died years ago. I want to see my husband."  
  
Julia swallowed hard before hesitantly inquiring, "Bess, what is your full name?"  
  
She was completely dumbstruck as the Earth-res replied, "My name is Bess Amelia Danziger."  
  
Julia was rooted in place, too shocked to move. Bess was becoming more upset by the moment and grabbed the doctor by both of her upper arms and began shaking her.  
  
"What's the matter with you?" She yanked Julia toward her, demanding through gritted teeth, "I want my husband, do you hear me? What have you done with him? What have you done with my family?"  
  
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, calm down," came the voice of Alonzo as he appeared behind a rattled, but thankful Julia and carefully began to extract her from the Bess' grasp. He'd been awake for about a minute, but had stayed still, unsure as to how Bess would deal with his presence. However, he'd had no choice but to act after the Earth-res had resorted to physically attacking his girlfriend.  
  
Solace spoke to Bess as if she were a child. "Try to get hold yourself, all right? We can't leave to get John until you're calmed down."  
  
He gently guided Bess' legs back onto the cot and pulled the covers back over her.  
  
"We're going to see if John's awake. But you need to promise us that, in the meantime, you'll stay put."  
  
Bess had had enough of the emotional roller coaster for the time being and acquiesced, silently gesturing her agreement. She curiously examined the two figures standing over her and became as white as a ghost when she realized that she recognized them. No, it can't be, she thought to herself. It just can't be.  
  
"Julia?" she said meekly, bouncing her mystified gaze between the couple. "Alonzo?"  
  
"Yes, Bess, it's us," he said. He reached out to comfort her, but halted when she cowered backward. "We'll explain everything when we get back. But we expect you to be exactly where you are right now, okay?"  
  
Bess wasn't sure who or what to believe anymore. In her eyes, there was only one person that could help her to sort out all of these strange occurrences and get some real answers. Moreover, she was certain that he wouldn't sit still until they'd located Adam. Perhaps he could also help her figure out why she was suddenly having so much trouble keeping her emotions under control.  
  
"You'll bring back John with you?"  
  
Julia reached for the sedigun, but Solace took her hand to stop her, surmising that, unless Bess was in immediate danger, he didn't want to waste their precious supply of tranquilizers. And based on his knowledge of what Bess and John had gone through, he suspected that every capsule would be needed.  
  
Realizing that Bess was probably as collected as she could possibly be under the circumstances, Alonzo led Julia toward the tent's exit and assured in a soothing tone, "We'll be back very soon."  
  
After the couple left, Bess curled up into a ball in her bunk and apprehensively closed her eyes. Her fractured mind immediately flashed to a recent time when she had been enslaved by an all-encompassing blackness. There, she had been robbed of all of her sensory functions as she wandered blindly through a dark abyss for what had seemed to be an eternity. There was no sight, sound, smell, taste, touch and, after awhile, no hope.  
  
Bess struggled to convince herself that her time in that torturous prison had been nothing more than a horrible nightmare. I'm alive and I'm certainly not alone, she rationalized. I have a wonderful husband, a terrific son and a beautiful little girl on the way.  
  
But as she pensively waited for John to arrive, her anxiety and fright continued to build within her and Bess found that she barely possessed the strength to stop it from taking over completely.  
  
"It's so dark," Bess moaned softly as she manically began to rock back and forth. "It's so, so dark..."  
  
__________ 


	15. 15/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 15  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
After confirming that Danziger was still resting safely in his quarters, Julia and Alonzo quietly headed out of the main campsite toward the edge of the woods where they could talk without being overheard by the others.  
  
"It just keeps getting better and better, doesn't it?" Alonzo bitterly broke the silence after reaching the privacy of the trees.  
  
Julia was exasperated. "My God, 'Lonz! What is Bess talking about?"  
  
Alonzo lowered himself to the soft grass, gently grabbing Julia's hand and pulling her downward to sit beside him.  
  
His voice was thick with emotion as he recounted, "Bess and John went through so much. Everyone that they loved was ripped away from them in such a short period of time, sometimes right in front of their eyes. Both of them were traumatized by their grief and by their guilt for surviving. They also felt an enormous amount of pressure knowing that the Terrians were watching their every move. They knew that the fate of humanity rested on their shoulders. Those first years were very difficult for them."  
  
Julia exclaimed in astonishment, "They thought that the Terrians had left them there to die?"  
  
"No," he corrected. "They thought that the Terrians had left them there to live. And that's exactly what they did. Bess and John are survivors. Against unspeakable odds, they rebuilt what was left of their lives from scratch. Eventually, their friendship turned into love and, for over a decade, they lived together as husband and wife. They even started a family."  
  
Julia's head was swirling, amazed at how casually Alonzo had revealed that Bess and Danziger had become lovers. The knowledge that their relationship had transpired on the Dreamscape and not in their physical reality did little to diminish the impact.  
  
"Adam... was... their... child?" she sputtered, finding that she could barely force out the words.  
  
"Yes. Bess was eight months pregnant with their daughter when she was taken out of the Dreamplane against her will."  
  
Julia recalled the look on Danziger's face at the mention of Bess' name earlier in the afternoon. She also noted the fondness in Bess' voice as she spoke of John in the med-tent.  
  
She realized in wonderment, "They were happy with their lives on the Dreamplane, weren't they?"  
  
After Solace reluctantly nodded, she sighed in defeat. "And we dragged Bess kicking and screaming back to a place and time that she no longer wants or understands."  
  
"It's worse than that," the pilot divulged. "Injecting Bess with the stimulant caused a terrible chain of events to take place. There was no guide to lead her out of the complicated maze of the Dreamscape and back to her true consciousness. By the time the Terrian had arrived, there was only her body left. Bess' soul became trapped in limbo and she was plunged into nothingness. It was like living in a black hole with no chance of escape. Those few minutes that it took for the medication to wake her felt like months to Bess. She existed in her own personal Hell." He quietly added, "It drove her to madness."  
  
Julia shook her head in disgust over her role in Bess' illness. "I'm so sorry."  
  
"You couldn't possibly have known what the stimulant would do to her," Alonzo assured her. "The Terrians are the ones to blame, not you."  
  
"But what happened to Danziger?" she probed, suddenly remembering that the mechanic wasn't exactly the picture of mental health, either.  
  
"Pulling Bess out of the Dreamplane triggered an accident that killed Adam at the same time. In an instant, John's entire life, his reason for living, was taken away. He wasn't able to recover from the trauma of losing the rest of his family. He was left completely alone with nothing but his suffering and heartbreak to keep him company. It was too much for him to handle and, over the years, his mind began to shut down. By the time he died, he was a totally broken man."  
  
He wiped a tear away with the sleeve of his jacket as he brought to mind the memories of his friends' descent into psychosis. "What the Terrians did to them was sadistic."  
  
Julia was horrified. "Can the Terrians do anything to fix this?"  
  
"Are you kidding? They don't even think there's a problem," Solace angrily scoffed. "We're just supposed to tell the others that everything they went through was an illusion and now we can go back to the way things used to be. As far as the Terrians are concerned, everything is back to normal."  
  
"How are we going to help them?" she posed uneasily.  
  
Alonzo placed his arm around Julia's waist and she laid her head against his shoulder. "I haven't a clue."  
  
__________  
  
Julia and Alonzo concluded that the best course of action was to inform Bess and John about their unusual situation as soon as possible. Because she was awake and relatively lucid, they decided to speak with Bess first. She softly cried as Julia and Alonzo explained the extraordinary circumstances that had ended up destroying her contented life on the Dreamplane and had left her an emotional wreck in the real world. Neither were able to get her to completely understand that what Bess knew as her reality the past fifteen years had never actually occurred. Julia dismally wondered which was the worse news for Bess to hear- finding out that her child was dead or being told that he had never existed in the first place.  
  
Alonzo had just begun to relay Danziger's own tale of woe and his current debilitated state of mind when Bess interrupted, "Wait a minute, John thinks that I'm dead?" She shuddered as the words left her mouth.  
  
Solace nodded. "He thought that you and Adam were killed in the avalanche." He didn't feel it necessary to elaborate on the condition of the two bodies left behind for him to bury.  
  
Bess fought with all her might to keep the semblance of control. "How long after my-," she gulped as she said the word, "death- did he live on the Dreamplane?"  
  
The pilot didn't answer and stared uncomfortably at the ground.  
  
"How- long- Alonzo?" Bess queried in a slightly shakier voice.  
  
"Twenty-nine years."  
  
"What?" Bess and Julia cried out in unison.  
  
Even with the testimonies of the other participating Edenites and Alonzo's revelation that John had died of old age, Julia still found herself unprepared to hear a time span of that magnitude. She remembered her own frightening experience of being left behind after the members of Eden Advance had discovered that she was a Council operative. She'd only spent one night alone in the woods before being retrieved by Alonzo yet she still occasionally suffered from terrifying nightmares regarding her brief abandonment. She couldn't imagine what Danziger had gone through.  
  
"He was alone for twenty-nine years," Solace continued as he raised his head to meet the women's stunned expressions. "All in all, John lived about forty-four years on the Dreamplane."  
  
Twenty-nine years. The words echoed in Bess' head over and over. She exhaled deeply and wiped the tears from her cheeks.  
  
"Take me to him," she said plainly.  
  
Julia contemplated the possible negative effect the Earth-res' presence might have on Danziger. She also worried about Bess' response to John's unsettling behavior.  
  
"Bess, he's not doing very well right now. Seeing True really upset him. It might be best to wait a day or two and then we can play it by ear."  
  
For the first time since she'd been brought back to consciousness, Bess wore a look of certitude. "Seeing me will be different from seeing True," she confidently expressed, although her tone was still almost childlike. "I know that you're trying to help us, but you have to believe me when I say that I know John better than anyone. Letting us be with each other is the best thing for him."  
  
She added as her voice wavered ever-so-slightly, "Please, Julia. It's the best thing for both of us."  
  
After conferring with each other for a few minutes, Julia and Alonzo agreed with Bess' recommendation that she be allowed to see John after he'd been filled in on the specifics of his Dreamplane existence. Bess was glad that she was able to keep her emotions in check well enough to convince them. She had no idea if what they were telling her was the truth. She didn't know if Adam was dead or if the two shapes sitting on crates at her bedside were really her old friends, Julia and Alonzo. Bess wasn't even sure if what she was currently experiencing was nothing more than another nightmare.  
  
But if it was real, her pain and confusion needed to take a back seat to more important issues. Right now, she had to harness all of her energies to get to John. Her husband needed her... and she needed him, too.  
  
__________  
  
Just when they thought it couldn't get any worse.  
  
Julia and Alonzo arrived at Danziger's tent to find him awake and sitting stoically on the edge of his cot. It took a few seconds of speaking to him before John acknowledged their presence by briefly making eye contact before returning his unfocused gaze to the floor. He didn't move or make a noise as Alonzo spelled out the details of the unfortunate events of the past few days. Although there were no words of protest, it was clear that Danziger didn't believe any of Solace's explanation that more than half of his life had been a figment of his own imagination.  
  
As Alonzo continued his one-sided conversation with the mechanic, Julia scanned his vital signs. She employed the Diaglove's echocardiogram function to check for heart and tissue damage and was greatly disturbed by the results.  
  
"You need to listen to me, John," she reexplained for the third time, still not able to break through to him. "Somehow, your time on the Dreamplane has caused you to develop an arrhythmia. Your heart isn't pumping enough blood to your organs and your blood pressure is bouncing up and down like a ping-pong ball. I need to start you on a regiment of beta- blockers and diuretics before it gets any more serious than it already is. But you have to tell me your symptoms so I can figure out the best way to handle your care. Are you're experiencing any lightheadedness or shortness of breath?"  
  
Danziger remained unresponsive and his lifeless eyes stayed glued to the ground.  
  
"What about chest pains?" she questioned as her frustration continued to grow.  
  
Danziger continued his silent treatment, compelling Julia to revert to scare tactics in an attempt to obtain a reaction. "Dammit, John, if this goes untreated, you're lungs are going to fill up with fluid and your kidneys are going to shut down. You'll suffer renal failure. That's if you don't die from a heart attack or a massive stroke first. Is that what you want?"  
  
Slowly and soundlessly, Danziger raised his head and gave the doctor a look that made it clear that dying was exactly what he wanted.  
  
"So you're just giving up?" she pressed, angrily slapping her hands against her thighs. "You're going to leave True an orphan?"  
  
"T-True's dead," John said flatly, finally joining the conversation.  
  
"I swear to you, John, True is alive," Alonzo earnestly offered as he stood and took a step toward the tent exit. "If you'd like, I can call her so you can see for yourself."  
  
The mechanic swiftly grabbed him by the forearm. "No. I accepted her d-death years ago. I'm not g-gonna let you bring her back to me just long enough for me to love her s-so you can take her away again for your own twisted amusement."  
  
He released his hold on Solace and let his arm fall listlessly to his side. "I w-won't be your lab rat any more. I'm d-done. I'm through with it all," John whispered.  
  
Oh, God, Julia realized in shock, he thinks that Alonzo and I are Terrian illusions and THIS is the Dreamplane.  
  
"Please John. Let us prove to you that True's okay," Julia implored.  
  
"I don't want to s-see her or anyone else. Add y-yourself to that list while you're at it," John stammered in a spiritless tone.  
  
Alonzo knew that John had come to terms with what he'd thought had been his daughter's passing over four decades before. However, he also understood from his time observing Danziger on the Dreamscape that there was someone else whose sudden death John still hadn't recovered from.  
  
"What about Bess?" Solace inquired.  
  
As he spoke her name, he saw a ripple of emotion flicker in John's eyes. He decided to use Danziger's deep affection for the Earth-res to his advantage. "She needs your help. Now, more than ever."  
  
He held the mechanic's weary gaze as he continued, "Look, I know that you don't believe a word that we're telling you, but suppose, just suppose, everything that we've said is the truth. That means that, not only is Bess suffering because of the way she left the Dreamplane, she's beside herself with grief over the loss of Adam and Eben. Right now, she's as scared and upset as you are. Probably more so. Are you just going to sit there and let her go through this all by herself?"  
  
Julia could see that his words were having an influential effect on John. "She's been asking for you," she added. "And I know that you want to see her, too."  
  
Danziger grappled with his conflicted feelings as he considered his options. If he had possessed the mental and physical strength to react the way he wanted to, he'd be throwing his weight around and demanding answers from these beings who'd taken the form of his deceased friends. He'd ask them why they couldn't just let him die with an ounce of dignity. Why did the Terrians feel it necessary to rob him of what little sanity he'd managed to maintain after all of these years alone? He'd done everything they'd wanted. He'd never given up and lived his life the best way he knew how, despite the hurdles he'd encountered. What more could they possibly want from him? Please, Please, just let this end, he inwardly begged.  
  
But what choice did he have except to go along with what they'd suggested? If he was going to be forced to interact with anyone, he'd want it to be with the illusion of Bess. After all, the apparitions of Alonzo and Julia looked and acted amazingly like the real thing, at least from what he'd remembered. And, on the minute chance these really were his friends, that would mean that Bess would be real, too. He would see his beautiful wife, again. The offer was too much to hope for and too good to refuse.  
  
Danziger silently nodded his consent to their proposal and Alonzo and Julia set their plan in motion to bring the two lost souls together.  
  
__________  
  
When it came to filling in the other Edenites about Bess and John's alternate lives on the Dreamplane, Julia and Alonzo remained tightlipped except to say that the experience had left them both in dire straits regarding their health. Although it was late in the evening, Alonzo instructed Walman and Baines to erect one of the larger tents to serve as living quarters for their two ill crewmates. It was placed at the northern perimeter of camp bordering the large trees to ensure their privacy from the other Advancers. As soon as the couple was situated, they planned to relocate the med-tent directly next to them in order for Julia and Alonzo to monitor their conditions.  
  
Morgan agreed to move in Bess' personal items, although he had misgivings about his wife sharing living space with another man. He was relieved to enter the tent and find two separate cots and Danziger's belongings piled on the opposite side of the dwelling. Julia assured him that these temporary living arrangements were imperative to Bess and John's recovery. She explained that both of them were nervous to be around people and neither were used to the hustle and bustle of a busy campsite anymore. Besides, she reminded Morgan, Bess and Danziger had already lived many years by themselves on the Dreamplane. Morgan wasn't thrilled about that part either, but decided to keep his mouth shut for the time being.  
  
At first, John refused to vacate his quarters, grumbling that he'd changed his mind and just wanted to be left alone. Alonzo came to realize that Danziger's apprehension to move was motivated by his fear of seeing his daughter and the other members of Eden Advance. It was only after the pilot had promised that the entire crew had been corralled into their tents and out of their scope of vision that John was coaxed to leave.  
  
As they slowly made their way across camp, an unseen True and Devon cast their worried glances toward the mechanic as they peeked through small holes in the canvas of the Adair tent. As he walked, John continued to gaze only at the ground in front of him until they reached his new housing. When he lifted the tent flap, John abruptly turned to face the base of the hill where he'd spent a large part of the last three decades of his other life.  
  
"The cemetery's g-gone," he said in a voice void of emotion.  
  
Before Solace could reply, John ducked into the sanctuary of the tent and silently sank down on the edge of his bunk, drained from his journey. He offered no further dialogue and didn't appear to be listening to anything that Alonzo said to him. Instead, Danziger fixed his hollow gaze on the wall.  
  
_____  
  
In contrast, Bess was becoming increasingly restless in anticipation of being reunited with John. She could barely sit still long enough for Julia to inject her with a hypospray to subdue her fluttering heart rate and rising blood pressure.  
  
"Why is it taking so long?" Bess impatiently kept asking the doctor. "Can't they hurry it up a little? I really need to see him."  
  
As she and Julia waited in the med-tent, Bess' agitation grew to the point where Julia began to reconsider whether bringing together Bess and John was such a good idea after all. Before she'd had a chance to ponder the decision more in depth, Alonzo contacted her on gear to let her know that Danziger had been successfully relocated to his new quarters.  
  
As soon as Bess heard the news, she bolted out the door before Julia could stop her and raced across the camp toward the northern woods. The Earth-res kept moving, despite the jolt of awareness that somehow her cabin had vanished and been replaced by a handful of tents. She was wide eyed and out of breath by the time she frantically entered the dwelling, startling Alonzo. In contrast, Danziger didn't move a muscle and continued to stare straight ahead.  
  
"John!" she called to him, relieved and overjoyed to finally see her husband.  
  
She came to a sudden standstill when she observed his unhealthy appearance.  
  
"John?" Bess spoke to the inert form, her tone now soft from fear.  
  
Danziger hesitantly turned his head to focus his attention toward the voice that he had longed to hear for almost thirty years. A wave of emotion swept over him as he gathered his strength and rose from his bed. He could only mouth Bess' name as she ran to him, throwing her arms around his neck and pulling him into a desperate hug. After a few seconds of reflection, John closed his eyes and sank into her embrace, squeezing her so tightly that it took Bess' breath away.  
  
"For s-so many years I've dreamed about this," he choked out. Bess could feel him trembling against her as he buried his face in her hair. "To see you. Just to hold you one m-more time."  
  
Bess arched back to study his anguished expression and couldn't remember ever seeing John look more vulnerable. She recognized how much he needed her to be strong for him.  
  
"Sssshhhh, it's okay, Sweetie. I'm here now," she comforted as she cupped his head in both of her hands.  
  
She tenderly grazed her lips across his before returning to share a deeper kiss full of urgency. As they clung to each other, Bess could feel her own strength beginning to weaken and she realized that she needed John to be strong for her, too.  
  
"Adam's dead," she murmured in sorrow as they parted.  
  
"I know," he nodded. And so are you, John dolefully added in his mind.  
  
Bess motioned over to Julia and Alonzo who had been silently watching the exchange. "They're saying that he was never alive in the first place."  
  
"So they tell me," he whispered.  
  
"Do you believe them? That these past years didn't really happen; that it was all in our minds?"  
  
John gave her a disheartened shrug. "I'm n-not sure of anything anymore."  
  
She surveyed their surroundings with bewildered eyes. "Is- is this real?" Bess asked.  
  
He placed his thumb and index finger on her chin and gently guided her gaze back to him.  
  
"I don't know, Babe," John admitted in sincerity. "But right now I don't care."  
  
They simultaneously leaned forward to share an emotional embrace which led to several longer, more passionate kisses. Neither seemed to mind or care in the least that Julia and Alonzo were witnessing the entire incident.  
  
Because Solace had been privy to their Dreamscape existence, he was understanding, even comfortable, with Bess and John's show of affection. Julia, on the other hand, looked as though her eyes were about to fall out of their sockets. It was one thing for the doctor to be verbally informed that Bess and Danziger had engaged in a long-term physical relationship on the Dreamplane. It was quite another to actually see them in each other's arms. These two people were her friends; one of whom was very married to an irritating, if not marginally endearing, midlevel bureaucrat. And, of course, everyone was well aware of John's feelings for Devon. The idea that Bess and Danziger had fallen in love with one another seemed preposterous, bordering on the bizarre, to Julia. How in God's name was this group ever going to be the same, she wondered.  
  
Bess and John finally seated themselves on John's cot. Bess locked her arms around his waist in a death grip while he looked at her in wonderment. Both were overpowered by their shock and confusion and Bess could no longer hold back her tears.  
  
"I don't understand why this is happening to us," she muttered between sobs as John tried to console her. "I want my life back. I want our lives back."  
  
Julia and Alonzo pulled up crates next to them and sat down.  
  
"Bess, I can't tell you how sorry I am for both of you," Julia expressed. "I know that it's going to be a difficult transition, but we'll do whatever we can to help you. I think that the first step is to recognize that what took place on the Dreamplane wasn't real."  
  
Bess' eyes narrowed and her voice became charged with anger. "Well, that's easy for you to say because you weren't there! We were," she declared, digging her thumb into her chest. "It was plenty real to us and I can't dismiss fifteen years of my life or forty-four years of John's life just because you say so."  
  
John nodded his head in concurrence before Alonzo related, "I know that it's going to be a tough road ahead for all of us, but-"  
  
"'But' what?" Bess cut him off harshly. "Do you honestly think that we can turn back the clock like nothing happened? Do you expect me to go back to being Morgan's wife? Morgan is dead to me. I came to terms with that a long time ago. My place is with John. I've spent over a third of my life with him. He's my husband. The father of my children-" Her voice began to crack and her hostility was abruptly replaced by despair as she remembered Adam and Eben. She turned her woeful gaze toward Danziger.  
  
"Please don't let them separate us, John," she whimpered in a tormented tone. "You're all I have left."  
  
John wanted nothing more than to be able to calm Bess' fears and take away her suffering. He wished that he could say that the worst was over and assure her that better futures lay ahead for them on the horizon. Unfortunately, he knew better. Therefore, he remained silent and instead pulled her close to lightly kiss her forehead.  
  
"No one's going to try to keep you two apart," Alonzo stated after perceiving that Danziger wasn't planning to offer any words of comfort. "Let's just take this all very slowly, okay?"  
  
"You both have been through a terrible trauma. Right now, I think that you should concentrate on healing yourselves. The other matters we'll deal with later," Julia pointed out as she stood up. She had to admit that she was feeling a bit overwhelmed, herself. "It's almost midnight and I'm sure that you two are exhausted. Why don't you try to get some rest."  
  
"Julia," Danziger uttered. There was uncertainty in his voice when he spoke her name as if he was unsure whether or not it was really her. "You were right about what you said before," he softly disclosed. "You know, about me not feeling so good. Do you think that m-maybe you could give me something for it?"  
  
"John, Honey, are you sick?" Bess asked him with doe-eyed innocence, her temperament now relaxed. "You don't look well," she remarked as she felt his brow for signs of a fever.  
  
"I'm fine, Sweetheart," he relayed in an awkward tone as he gently removed her hand. "Just a little t-tired, that's all. Julia's gonna fix me up, right Doc?"  
  
Julia was relieved that Danziger was finally consenting to medical treatment and was about to ask for more information regarding his symptoms, but decided to hold off. She could tell by the cautious expression on John's face that he didn't want to go into detail about his health and risk further upsetting Bess. After briefly examining him, she administered an injection of beta-blockers to slow the swelling of his heart.  
  
"I'll check on you in the morning and we'll see if we need to increase the dosage," she calmly related before replacing the hypogun in her med- bag.  
  
"And we'll bring you breakfast," Alonzo suggested. "That is, unless you want to eat with the group in the meal tent."  
  
"No," came the unified response.  
  
Bess and John directed their gazes toward the ground at the staggering prospect of reconnecting with their long-believed dead friends and family. So much has changed, both thought to themselves.  
  
"We can't face the others just yet," the Earth-res sighed dejectedly. "Maybe in a few days."  
  
"You know, you're not going to be able to hide from them forever," Julia rationalized as she and Alonzo made their way toward the tent's exit.  
  
Bess and John exchanged a troubled look. "Don't be so sure," John muttered under his breath.  
  
__________  
  
The following two days, Bess and John were true to their statement and remained secluded in their tent. They refused all visitors with the exception of Julia and Alonzo and attempted to keep their visits as short as possible. Danziger concentrated all of his efforts on the Herculean task of shielding Bess from the pain and confusion of the outside world. The same world that neither of them were so sure really existed outside of their own minds.  
  
Bess was barely able to remain in control of her emotions and sometimes her unpredictable behavior would sway drastically in very short spans of time. She would be nearly inconsolable over the loss of her children only to suddenly become full of rage at the futility of their current circumstances. She was often genuinely confused and several times John was forced to remind her of where they were and why.  
  
Danziger seemed to be the only person who could ease Bess' anxiety and severe depression. He tried to keep her occupied by playing cards, retelling old stories about their youth, even talking about the 'old days' on G889. Sometimes it just came down to John gingerly rocking her as she cried in his arms. Danziger never shed a tear.  
  
Unfortunately, it was becoming apparent to Julia and Alonzo that the combination of incomprehensible loss and unbearable years of solitude had taken an expensive toll on the mechanic. Although he was more talkative and stuttered much less frequently when Bess was around, John was physically and emotionally depleted to the point that he was having trouble functioning. Often if Bess' attention was diverted elsewhere, Danziger would regress into a catatonic state similar to the spells he'd suffered from during his final years on the Dreamplane. It would sometimes take several seconds for them to rouse him from his self-induced trance. When he would finally snap back to consciousness, he would gape at them with a frightened expression until he caught sight of Bess. Tears would fill the Earth-res' eyes as she comforted John and assured him that he wasn't alone.  
  
"Life... death... it doesn't matter, Sweetheart. We'll always be together," she pledged with conviction. "I promise that I'll never leave you, again."  
  
For Julia and Alonzo, it was an agonizing scene to watch as their two close friends seemed to be fading away before their eyes. And nothing could be done.  
  
_____  
  
Perched under a tree not too far from their tent, Devon, True and Morgan sat in vigilance as they awaited any new information about their loved ones.  
  
"This is getting ridiculous. Why won't they let us visit them?"  
  
"I don't know, Morgan, but I'm sure that they have their reasons," Devon replied calmly, though she was inwardly concerned as to what those reasons might be. She squeezed True's hand in a soothing gesture. "I'll talk to Julia and see if maybe Bess and your dad can join us for supper tonight."  
  
"Yeah. That'd be nice," she said hopefully. "And if they're too sick to come out, we can bring them dinner instead. That way, at least we'd get to see 'em." True leaned her head against Devon's shoulder and sadly exhaled. "I miss Dad so much."  
  
Devon let out a sigh and quietly revealed, "I know, Honey. I miss him a lot, too."  
  
Despite her worries, Devon closed her eyes and treasured the warming rays of the afternoon sun which edged through the myriad of tangled branches above her. Strange, she thought to herself. A few days ago, she would have sought the shade of a different tree; preferably one with broad, umbrella-like limbs that would completely screen out the sun and everything else around her. But now, she yearned to feel the light on her face as well as seek out the company of people who, until very recently, she had been avoiding. And, most of all, Devon wanted to spend time with John Danziger.  
  
People can change... sometimes more than once. Back on the Stations, Devon Adair had been an unapologetic and uncompromising captain of industry, proud of her ability to make even the most confident businessmen quake in their boots. With the exception of Yale, she didn't feel the necessity of having friends. And aside from her dream lover, Shepard, she didn't want the complication of engaging in physical relationships with men; at least, any long-term associations, that is. Sex was simply used as another tool of manipulation, albeit one of the more pleasurable ones, to get what she wanted. And when she'd chosen to produce an heir to her fortune, it was how she got her son.  
  
However, after Uly was born with the Syndrome, her priorities regarding the importance of her business changed. Devon became an infamous thorn in the side of the government regarding bringing recognition to a disease that, until then, few had dared to speak openly about. When she'd decided that the only remedy for her son's illness was to leave the Stations in search of a new world, the Council didn't exactly see eye to eye with her. Devon's refusal to yield in the face of every obstacle the government threw in front of her had only caused her notoriety to become what legends are made of. And she basked in her role.  
  
However, things went wildly off-course (literally) when they crashed on G889. Devon found herself faced with problems that couldn't be solved by staging a boardroom tirade or with sending a heated cyber-memo. For the first time, circumstances compelled her to curb her normally autocratic style of leadership and allow it to evolve into a more balanced partnership with the members in her group. She had gradually learned to listen and permitted herself to be influenced by the opinions of others as well as her own emotions. She'd learned to trust (some would say too much at times). Despite the dangers that seemed to lurk around every corner, she was shocked at how happy her life had become after she'd lowered her defenses and opened her heart to friendship. At one point, she'd even entertained the notion of love.  
  
Then, her friends started to get sick and everything changed. She watched helplessly as all of the people whom she'd come to deeply care about slowly began to die. Not too long afterward, Eben became the first casualty of the mysterious disease. Devon's new outlook was further threatened when they'd learned of the existence of Eve and about the malfunction of the bio-stat chips. Even when the implants were repaired and the others were restored to health, Elizabeth Anson cryptically forewarned them that humans wouldn't survive on the planet. Moreover, Devon remained ill for no apparent reason and continued to worsen until she collapsed in a heap behind her tent. She laid there, helpless and unable to move, listening to her crewmates debate on how to best help her before it was too late. As they placed her in her icy tomb, the sober realization hit her. There was no doubt about it- Devon had somehow lost control of the entire situation.  
  
When she was finally healed two months later, Devon emerged with a whole new perspective on life. Gone was the optimism and willingness to cooperate, along with the desire for companionship besides what Uly and Yale could provide. She was all business and purposefully cut herself off from the other Edenites. She'd deduced that permitting herself to have personal feelings for the members of Eden Advance would only open her up to pain and heartbreak and she didn't need the distraction. New Pacifica and her son were the most important things in her life and she grudgingly endured the presence of the others as a necessary means to an end.  
  
But now, her eyes had been reopened after learning another powerful lesson. Few people are graced with the gift of another chance at life. Yet, somehow, she'd been lucky enough to be given, not just a second, but a third chance to live.  
  
Although her time on the Dreamplane had been short, it had shaken her beyond anything she could ever have imagined and had provided her with a lifetime of knowledge. It was a reawakening of gargantuan proportions; not only because she'd returned to find Uly and herself alive, but because of the intense joy she'd felt when seeing Alonzo, Julia, Morgan and True safe, too. Devon reevaluated how much their friendships truly meant to her and the void that would have been left in her heart in they had indeed died at the hands of the Terrians as she had previously been led to believe. She'd immediately felt another shift in her priorities; this time focusing on the emotional fulfillment she received from the crew of Eden Advance.  
  
She had tended to the people whom she now regarded as friends as each awoke after 'dying' on the Dreamscape. She'd listened to their stories and helped to clarify their current confusion over what was real versus an illusion. The majority of Devon's time was spent with a frightened True as she remained with her comatose father in their quarters. They both sat with John at his bedside and took turns sleeping to ensure that someone would be with him when he woke up. On the Dreamplane, John's agonized face as he'd valiantly tried to save her was the last image Devon had seen before the Terrians had returned her to consciousness. Yale and the others had also relayed Danziger's intense grief over her and True's supposed deaths. She was also incredibly proud of John that he, along with Bess, had eventually taken charge of the remaining group and he'd done everything in his power to keep the others alive.  
  
Devon found herself remembering all of the other times he'd been there for her over the past months, whether she'd wanted him to be or not. Even after she'd rebuffed his advances a few weeks earlier, Danziger continued to watch over her and Uly, though it was more at a distance. Thinking back, she now wished that she'd dealt with his declaration of affection for her a bit more diplomatically than she had. In truth, she hadn't exactly been treating him very well since she was released from cold-sleep. However, as she sat there studying his rugged features, she had made the important decision to rectify the situation when he returned from the Dreamscape. As soon as he opened his eyes, she would apologize for her negative attitude toward him and offer a truce. More than that, she would admit to John that she really did want him in her life. Devon would confess that she had fallen in love with him.  
  
Unfortunately, Danziger didn't return from the Dreamplane as soon as everyone had hoped. In fact, he didn't come back at all. Devon had fought hard in favor of administering the dose of stimulants to John, but had respected True's decision to wait. It had initially seemed to be the correct choice to make after Bess had become practically unhinged after being given the injection.  
  
However, now John was awake and suffering from delusional behavior as well. Moreover, Devon was restricted from visiting him. He'd even refused to speak to her and True on gear. She was at a complete loss as to what to do. Although never known as a patient woman, Devon had honored his wishes and granted Bess and Danziger their privacy. So far. Hopefully, Julia would find a way to get through to them soon. If not, Devon was going to have to resort to more extreme measures to see the man whom she now planned on spending the rest of her life with.  
  
__________ 


	16. 16/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 16  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
Danziger knew that Julia was correct when she'd expressed that he and Bess would not be able to hide from the members of Eden Advance forever. Although her depression remained, Bess' bouts of discomposure had been lessening in degree and there were wider gaps between her breaks with reality. John was still having plenty of trouble deciphering the difference between what was real and unreal. However, as long as Bess was around to take care of (and to take care of him), he was generally able to hold himself together. Though he tried to conceal it the best he could, Danziger was also keenly aware of the seriousness of his physical illness. Despite Julia's best efforts, he knew that his heart was continuing to weaken. Because of this, John understood how essential it was that Bess be reintegrated with the people who were going to be responsible for her care after he was gone. Therefore, he reluctantly decided that they would join the group by the campfire that evening, if only for a few minutes.  
  
There was tension in the air as Bess and Danziger exited their asylum and made their way toward the light at the center of camp where the other colonists were gathered. They were escorted by Alonzo and Julia, who'd made sure to keep a sedative in the pocket of her jacket just in case Bess became overly agitated. It had been determined that, at least for the time being, Bess and John's personal relationship would remain a secret. Consequently, Danziger took a seat away from the Earth-res, but still made certain that she was clearly in view. Morgan approached and silently sat next to an uneasy Bess who immediately scooted herself closer to Julia. The dejected look on the bureaucrat's face was heartbreaking when he'd also noticed that Bess had removed his wedding band from her finger.  
  
True apprehensively pulled up a crate next to her father. As happy as she was to finally see him, she was unnerved by his appearance. He just didn't look right.  
  
"Hi, Daddy," she greeted.  
  
"Hello, T-True," he matter-of-factly stated as he stared at the dancing flames.  
  
Devon joined the pair and held out a steaming mug in his direction. "I thought you might like some coffee."  
  
After a few seconds, John slowly turned to her and took the cup. She was immediately aware of the dark circles under his eyes and his shaking hand as he brought the brew to his lips.  
  
"Thank you," came the robotic reply and the mechanic turned back toward the fire.  
  
An uncomfortable stillness followed before Cameron decided to break the ice. "You know, I-" He started again after putting his arm around Denner. "We really want to thank you for all that you did for us on the Dreamplane."  
  
"You two did an amazing job of trying to keep us alive," Denner agreed.  
  
Danziger didn't veer his attention from the blaze in front of him. "Apparently n-not amazing enough. You're all dead," he gruffly announced. No one missed that he was speaking about their deaths in the present tense.  
  
Yale and Devon looked at each other questioningly. "You did the best that you could," the tutor pointed out. "Apparently, our survival skills were not as strong as yours and Bess'."  
  
Bess and Danziger continued to stare straight ahead in silence.  
  
Walman and Magus exchanged a guilty glance. "I guess that we should've tried harder to stick around," Magus said.  
  
"Yes, you should have," Bess replied bluntly causing True to make a mental note to herself that the Earth-res didn't look or sound right, either.  
  
An unusually flustered Devon expressed, "Look, I'm not sure what happened to the two of you. But whatever you did on the Dreamplane somehow convinced the Terrians to allow us to colonize the planet."  
  
Yale added, "I don't think that we could possibly express the amount of gratitude that we owe you."  
  
"Alonzo says that you two are the only reason that we're standing here right now," Julia noted. "You saved our lives."  
  
Bess wasn't bothering to listen to the conversation. She was absolutely fascinated at seeing the other members of Eden Project, again. They were exactly the same as she had remembered them. Although there was no doubt in her mind that John was real, she still wasn't completely sure about the others. Either way, she couldn't help but be impressed at how lifelike they were.  
  
After a few more awkward moments of silence, Bess unexpectedly broke out into chuckles causing the other crewmates to shift nervously in their seats.  
  
"Are you feeling all right, Bess?" Walman hesitantly asked as Julia repositioned her hand closer to her pocket.  
  
Bess tried to stifle her laughter. "I'm fine," she replied wearing a sweet smile. She turned to the quiet mechanic. "Look, John. Baines is wearing our curtains."  
  
Danziger examined the attire of his formerly deceased friend and grinned slightly. "Yeah, I guess that he is."  
  
"'Curtains'?" Devon gently prodded.  
  
Bess revealed in a friendly tone, "The curtains in the living room of our house."  
  
"You guys built a house?" Mazatl asked incredulously.  
  
"Oh, yes. A big, beautiful house," Bess exclaimed excitedly as she reminisced. Nearly everyone realized that her Southern accent had returned. "John knew that we wouldn't last forever in the cave. We needed something more permanent to live in. So he built one."  
  
"We built one. You worked just as hard on it as I did," Danziger corrected softly and with emotion in his voice.  
  
He met Bess' adoring gaze across the fire and the pair looked at each other as if they were the only two people in the world.  
  
"And it wasn't that big," he added fondly as his own grin began to widen.  
  
"It's the perfect size," she responded, her eyes sparkling with affection. Now, Bess was confusing her tenses, too.  
  
There were some very nervous glances traded between several of the Advancers as they watched and listened to Bess and John's conversation. It seemed that, as awful as the overall experience might have been for them, those years spent on the Dreamplane may have had its perks after all.  
  
"Exactly how big was this house of yours?" an uncomfortable Walman asked.  
  
Bess broke her stare with the mechanic in order to address the curious crowd. "Well, we have a living room with a fireplace, a kitchen, a bathroom complete with hot water, a dining room-"  
  
"And two bedrooms," Danziger interjected as both Morgan and Devon let out the breaths that they had been simultaneously holding.  
  
"You had indoor power and plumbing?" Baines queried.  
  
"Uh-huh," the Earth-res chirped, beaming with pride. "Oh, and you should see the greenhouse."  
  
A confused look overtook her face as she realized that she was sitting in the exact spot where the greenhouse should be. Bess suddenly remembered Julia and Alonzo telling her something about living for a time within a parallel reality. Unfortunately, at that moment she couldn't recollect the exact times her Dreamplane life had started and ended. It had ended, hadn't it? Maybe that's where the greenhouse went, she surmised. She also remembered Julia relaying that her husband, John, had lived in the same alternate reality, but had been there much longer than she had.  
  
She pivoted her head back toward Danziger in puzzlement. "Did you ever finish building the addition to the house?" she asked, still struggling to make sense of it all.  
  
The emotion drained from his tone and John sadly returned his gaze to the campfire. "After you died, there was really n-no point to finishing it, was there?"  
  
Bess' eyes filled with tears as the memories began to flood back into her consciousness. Now, she remembered everything. Her house was gone and so were her children. John was no longer her husband. The last fifteen years of her life had been a lie. Oh, God...  
  
Uly had been waiting to fill in the others on how he'd spent his afternoon and this seemed to be the right moment.  
  
"Mr. Danziger?" he innocently beckoned. "I talked to the Terrians and they said that they want to try to make things right, again."  
  
Amidst the shocked mumblings of the other Advancers, Devon gently admonished, "Uly, I thought that I told you that you are not to speak with the Terrians anymore. They're dangerous."  
  
"They're not dangerous, Mom," he disputed simply before turning his attention back to the mechanic. "They made a mistake and they're really sorry for what they did."  
  
Bess couldn't believe her ears. It did nothing to help the situation when she recognized the clothing that Uly was wearing as the same outfit that Adam had outgrown years before.  
  
"'Sorry'? Did you just say that the Terrians were 'sorry'!?!" she spat as she abruptly launched to her feet, stunning the colonists. "Well, you can tell the Terrians that they're a day late and a credit short! As a matter of fact, they're fifteen years too late!" She let out a chortle that had a slightly unbalanced edge to it.  
  
Devon placed her arms around Uly in a protective gesture and automatically looked to John for additional security. She was surprised to see Danziger remain seated, his attention now focused on the ground.  
  
John was busy concentrating on the blades of grass lightly swaying in the evening breeze. He wondered to himself is the grass was real. He was curious as to whether or not he could make it disappear if he thought about it hard enough. Maybe he could even change the direction of the wind...  
  
In the meantime, Bess was becoming louder and more belligerent with each syllable. "I do not accept the Terrian's apology, do you hear me? I will never accept their apology!"  
  
Bess' shouts were enough to finally shake John out of his reverie. "Bess," he said quietly as he stood. His face was a mask, but there was pain reflected in his eyes and voice. "Please stop."  
  
She whirled around to face him. "Look what they've done to us, John! Look what they're still doing to us!"  
  
Her anger disintegrated into a mournful cry and she dropped her arms to her sides in a defeated stance. "It's so unfair. It's just so unfair," she began to murmur.  
  
Danziger quickly moved passed the startled crew to rejoin Bess. As he closed the distance between them, he observed Julia's hand disappear into her jacket. He gently grabbed the doctor by the wrist before she could remove the sedative from her pocket.  
  
"She doesn't need that," John told Julia softly, but firmly. "Let's just get her b-back to the tent so she can lay down. This'll pass."  
  
Julia nodded in agreement and John was about to take the remaining step toward Bess when his path was suddenly blocked.  
  
"No, I'll take her, Danziger," Morgan announced, stepping directly in front of him. It was a declaration more than an offer.  
  
Bess appeared absolutely panic-stricken. "John?" she whimpered in a childlike voice.  
  
Danziger reached around Morgan and gingerly guided Bess to the side in order for him to address her directly. Ignoring the astonished stares of the group, he crouched his head down until they were at eye-level.  
  
"Now, I need you to do what Julia says. Go back to the tent and rest, okay? Will you do that for me?"  
  
"Aren't you coming, too?" she asked timidly.  
  
Morgan cut in, "Danziger will be there in a few minutes." He disguised his worry the best that he could under the circumstances. "Julia and I will take you to your tent, okay, Honey?"  
  
Bess looked at Morgan in bewilderment as if she had no idea who he was.  
  
"You go ahead. I'll be there s-soon," Danziger urged as Julia interlocked her arm with Bess' and began escorting her away. Morgan followed along on the opposite side, but didn't touch her for fear of her reaction. Bess stared pleadingly over her shoulder back at John as she was ushered out of sight.  
  
Now, Danziger became the center of attention at the campfire. No one knew what to say and gaped at him with a mixture of uncertainty, concern and pity. Before anyone could question him or offer any words of encouragement, John stormed away toward the vehicles located at the opposite end of camp. True scurried after him as Devon tried in vain to stop her. The leader hurriedly stumbled to her feet with the intention of following both Danzigers. However, she halted in her tracks when Alonzo focused in on her son's revelation.  
  
"Uly, did you say that the Terrians are willing to help us?" the pilot queried.  
  
"Uh-huh," he affirmed before looking down at the ground guiltily. "I'm sorry, Mom. I know that I wasn't supposed to talk to them, but the Terrians are my friends. I thought that they could help Mr. Danziger and Mrs. Martin."  
  
"It's all right, Sweetie," Devon assured as she knelt down and placed her hands on Uly's shoulders. "What did they tell you?"  
  
"Just that they didn't know that anyone would get hurt. They said that Mrs. Martin had kind of an accident on the Dreamplane. Something about her getting lost 'cause she didn't have a guide. I didn't really understand what they meant." Uly shrugged his shoulders. "I don't think they know why Mr. Danziger is sick."  
  
"Did they tell you anything else?" Devon asked.  
  
"Uh-huh. They said for Alonzo to dream with them tonight. That maybe they can figure out a way to fix them."  
  
"'Maybe' they can figure out a way?" Baines snapped. "You mean, the Terrians aren't even sure if they can do anything?"  
  
Alonzo piped in with a tinge of irritation, "Uly, I've already dreamt to them about this. I couldn't make the Terrians see that there was a problem to begin with. Why are they willing to help us now?"  
  
"They said that when you spoke to them before, they had trouble understanding you," the child revealed. "All the Terrians could hear was your anger."  
  
Alonzo pulled his head back in surprise as Uly's remarks struck a truthful chord. It made sense when he considered that the Terrians were not used to dealing with human emotions. And there was certainly no doubt that Alonzo had been pretty pissed off during his last Dreamplane excursion.  
  
"So it's possible that something can be done to help Bess and John," he ventured.  
  
Uly nodded, "The Terrians said that they would try."  
  
"Yeah, well they'd better try," Walman blurted out as Magus took his hand. "Considering they're the ones who caused this mess."  
  
_____  
  
Danziger was feeling completely overwhelmed. After Morgan and Julia had led Bess back to their quarters, he had begun surveying the campsite along with its inhabitants... and he didn't like what he saw. His confusion had caused him to flee his surroundings and seek a quieter venue.  
  
What he needed to do was think. There had to be a perfectly understandable explanation as to how and why he was stuck there with the visions of his friends. Could he possibly be in the midst of experiencing the final section of the Terrian's exam? Did the creatures have the ability to tap into his mind upon his death as a last effort for them to see what makes humans tick? Were they studying his memories of the past along with his desires for what might have been?  
  
Perhaps they'd tossed him temporarily back in time to view parts of his former life as some kind of reward for participation in the Terrian's experiment. One last hurrah down memory lane which could also serve to benefit the creatures' own growth and understanding of humanity. Maybe this was the first stop in a line of revisits to various places and times that occurred over the many years of his life. Perhaps Alex and Les'll come by later to swap stories. Maybe Elle will make an appearance!  
  
John's impaired mind continued to drift as he stumbled through the field toward the vehicles. He was awestruck when he caught sight of the Transrover. He had stripped that down to its axles decades ago, hadn't he? He and Bess had used its parts for... Bess. His wife was here. Or at least, she appeared to be here with him. The Terrians must be giving him a final chance to see her, again. After all, she was in the foreground of his thoughts throughout the last half of his life. It would make sense that the creatures would send her to him first. True was here, too, he speculated. Adam's probably not that far behind.  
  
Danziger attempted to shake himself back to cognitive thought. "What I am experiencing now is real," he whispered as he tried to convince himself. "I'm not dead. This is not the Dreamplane or s-some kind of Terrian trick."  
  
He sighed halfheartedly as he ran his hand along the rubberized seams of the 'Rover's windows. It certainly felt authentic. Of course, there was only one problem with that logic, Danziger bitterly noted. It had also felt just as real forty-some years ago when he'd yanked it apart in order to use the vehicle's glass for the windows of their cabin.  
  
What if the others were telling him the truth? That, in reality, forty-four years of his life had been a four day trip to the Dreamscape. The enormity of it made John feel like he was being crushed from all sides. He couldn't have just imagined it all, could he? In his mind and heart, he felt like a frail man in his eighties, even if his outward physical appearance was that of a healthy thirty-seven year old. How could they say it wasn't real? How could the Terrians and the other Edenites just invalidate his existence like that? He'd lived... he'd loved... he'd lost. God, how he'd lost. John had already had a full life. It was just too much to ask or expect of him to live another one.  
  
Too emotionally depleted to remain standing, he sagged to the ground with his back against the 'Rover's front tire. Danziger could slowly feel himself starting to crumble from within as he sank backward deeper and deeper into the recesses of his mind. However, just as his eyes began to glaze over, he was shaken back to attention by True.  
  
"Dad? Are you okay?" she worriedly asked as she stood over him. If she hadn't seen his chest rise and fall, she would have thought that he was dead. "Dad?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm f-fine," he finally responded as he looked up at her. True could tell by her father's dazed expression that he had no idea how long she'd been standing there.  
  
She resisted the urge to jump into his arms and, instead, nervously fidgeted with the buttonholes of her jacket. "I really missed you," she related.  
  
As he gazed at her, John could feel his heart breaking. "I m-missed you, too. You know, there wasn't a day that went by that I d-didn't think about you," he wistfully recounted as he exhaled a shallow breath.  
  
The years of guilt and regret began to pour out of him, although he found that he lacked the strength to cry. "I-I made so many mistakes in my life. Taking you with me as part of the Eden Ops crew was one of the biggest. I should've left you b-behind. You know, Elle's cousin offered to raise you, but I told her no way. I insisted on bringing you with me even though I knew the m-mission could be dangerous." He shook his head in defeat. "If you were back on the Stations, I would have missed out on being a part of your life, but, at least, you would've had one. You would've gotten the chance to grow up. I t-took that away from you because I was selfish."  
  
Danziger tore his vision from what he thought was the Terrian induced apparition of his daughter and lamented, "I wish that I'd been able to c- convince the Terrians to let you live. But, by the time I found out that they'd taken you, it was t-too late. You were gone." He clamped his eyes shut, no longer able to face her image.  
  
True's mouth fell open in surprise. He was looking and talking to her as if she was a ghost! What had the Terrians done to her father?  
  
She fell to her knees next to his seated frame. "Daddy, I'm alive," she tried to assure him. "All of that bad stuff that happened to you was on the Dreamplane. The Terrians didn't kill me."  
  
She grabbed his limp hand and put it to her cheek. "I'm real, see?" She touched his pale face with her other hand in a further effort to convince him. "See, Daddy? It's really me."  
  
She was relieved when John finally reopened his eyes. He appeared to be studying her as he reached up and tucked a few strands of loose hair behind his daughter's ear.  
  
"I loved you so much, T-True. I'm so sorry that I wasn't able to save you. I'm s-so sorry that I wasn't able to save the others. I f-failed every one of you."  
  
True was momentarily paralyzed. She'd seen her dad upset before, but never like this. She had no idea how unwell he was. Julia had explained to her that the Dreamplane had made Bess and her father sick, but didn't elaborate except to say that they would require everyone's help and support to get better. But as afraid as she was for him, Dad had gotten into plenty of scrapes before and he'd always ended up just fine. And if other people were hurt or sick, too, her father was almost always the one who'd pulled them through it. He was the smartest and bravest man that True had ever known.  
  
However, listening to him now, True realized that her dad was suffering from a different kind of illness. He didn't have cuts or bruises or a virus like the one he'd caught from Alex at the other escape pod. This was something else altogether. He didn't seem to be in touch with reality. And, at that moment, True couldn't ever remember being more frightened for her father.  
  
"I'm still here, Daddy. You did save me. You saved all of us," she exclaimed, flinging her arms around his chest. She could feel him faintly wheezing as she tightened her grip. "And I love you, too," she whispered.  
  
_____  
  
After finishing their conversation at the campfire, Devon, Yale and Alonzo went in search of John and True. They found the two of them still situated at the base of the Transrover's wheel. True was curled up against her father. Danziger's sunken blue eyes were vacantly staring off into space.  
  
Before anyone could approach the seated pair, they heard Magus frantically yelling John's name as she ran to join the group.  
  
"Danziger, we need you to go back to your tent now," she exclaimed, out of breath. He didn't respond to her calls or to True's gentle prodding.  
  
"Has something happened?" Yale inquired.  
  
"Not yet," Magus replied curtly as she dropped to her knees in front of the mechanic.  
  
"Hey!" she shouted and began roughly shaking him. "Wake up, Danziger!"  
  
Devon dove forward and grabbed her shoulder. "What the hell are you doing?" she hissed angrily. "Stop it, Magus!"  
  
After assuming co-leadership of the surviving members of Eden Advance and suffering a violent death on the Dreamplane, Linda Magus had returned to her true reality upset and confused. However, she was also armed with a tougher attitude and a healthy dose of gumption. Devon Adair no longer intimidated her.  
  
She irately removed Devon's hand and shot back in an authoritative tone, "We don't have the time to treat him with kid gloves."  
  
Magus ignored Devon's leer and returned her attention to Danziger who was coming around. "Get up, John. You gotta come with me. We need your help with Bess."  
  
Slowly, Danziger's alertness was restored and his eyes focused on his crewmate. After a few seconds of wearing a puzzled expression, he wordlessly nodded his acceptance and Magus helped him stagger to his feet. The two hurried toward his quarters, leaving the others to bring up the rear. However, as Devon started off toward the tent, True gripped her hand to stop her.  
  
"Dad is really, really sick," the little girl revealed with a terrified look on her face.  
  
"I know," Devon said as she gave the child a gentle tug to encourage her to start moving. She was more interested in catching up to John than standing around and talking.  
  
True refused to budge and dug her feet into the ground.  
  
"No, you don't know," the child countered, shaking her head. Tears filled True's eyes and her bottom lip quivered as she related, "Devon, he still thinks that I'm dead!"  
  
_____  
  
As they neared the dwelling, Danziger could hear a commotion of noises emanating from inside the tent. The concerned crowd that had assembled nearby parted down the middle to allow John entry. Alonzo followed him in and lowered the tent flap behind them, cutting off the Edenites' view. There was pandemonium as Julia and Morgan were unsuccessfully trying to pacify a hyperventilating Bess who was huddled against the far corner of the tent like a frightened animal. She was holding her suitcase in front of her, attempting to use it as a shield.  
  
Danziger's inward struggle as to whether or not the event playing out before him was actually taking place was overshadowed by his instinct to protect. He wasted no time and went to Bess' cowering form and lovingly laid both hands on her shoulders. Bess didn't resist as he slid his hands down her arms and gently removed the baggage from her grasp.  
  
"What's going on?" Danziger roughly directed his question to the equally rattled doctor and liaison as he placed the suitcase safely out of Bess' reach.  
  
Before they could answer, Bess tearfully begged between rapid breaths, "John, make them leave! Please, just make them leave!"  
  
It was obvious how distressed she was and John concentrated on putting a halt to her panic attack. He bent down to mirror her height and soothingly instructed, "You need to breathe, okay?"  
  
He loudly inhaled and exhaled several times in order to encourage her to do the same. Eventually, Bess began to mimic his exaggerated breathing pattern.  
  
"That's it, Hon. Deep, full breaths," John praised.  
  
"Make them go," she quietly beseeched as her respiration gradually began to return to normal.  
  
Danziger turned to address the others, though his eyes were directly centered on Morgan. "You heard what the lady said. Get out," he said firmly.  
  
Morgan wasn't the least bit swayed. "I'm not going anywhere!" he protested.  
  
He looked passed the mechanic to speak to his wife. "Bess, why won't you tell me what's wrong?" When she didn't respond to him, he emotionally added, "I love you, Sweetheart."  
  
Upon hearing Morgan's words, the Earth-res' eyes went wide with fear and she began to quake uncontrollably. John was worried that she might collapse and carefully began to guide her toward her bunk.  
  
"I don't belong here," she repeatedly whimpered as Danziger helped her into bed and sat down next to her.  
  
Morgan was relieved that they could finally get close to Bess. "Give her the sedaderm, Julia," he implored.  
  
"No. She doesn't need it," John disagreed softly, never breaking eye contact with Bess. "Just give her a m-minute or two and she'll be fine."  
  
"Look at her! OF COURSE, she needs it!" Morgan animatedly insisted as he observed his wife's erratic demeanor. "Bess, Honey, Julia's going to give you something to calm you right down."  
  
Danziger stood up to his full height and stepped toward the bureaucrat until they were almost nose to nose.  
  
"Don't you touch her, do you hear me?" the mechanic coolly challenged. "You can't just pump her full of drugs every time she gets upset." He added in a low growl, "I won't let you."  
  
"I don't remember seeing the letters 'M.D.' after your name!" Morgan shot back, for once, undaunted by Danziger's hard stare and words. "Julia, give her the injection," Morgan commanded, not backing down or veering his determined gaze from the mechanic.  
  
Alonzo began prodding the two men apart before any punches could be thrown over the most effective way to manage the care of the woman whom they both loved.  
  
"Danziger's right, Morgan," the doctor grudgingly confirmed as she stepped in between them. "Even if we wanted to, we don't have a large enough supply of sedatives to medicate Bess every time she displays irrational behavior. We need to deal with this problem head on. Maybe if we allow Bess to let out her pain, it will help her recovery."  
  
"Pain? What pain?" Morgan worriedly asked as he rushed to the Earth- res' bedside. "Bess, are you in pain?"  
  
Bess had curled up sideways with her knees pressed to her chest. "I feel so empty," she muttered in between cries. "I don't want to be here anymore."  
  
The mechanic reseated himself beside her on the mattress and gingerly took hold of her hand. He understood her hurt and confusion over circumstances that were beyond her control. Plus, he remembered his own sadness the first time that he'd lost a child.  
  
"Ssshhh. I know, Bess," he nodded somberly. "Believe me, I know."  
  
"Bess, Honey, I don't know what you mean," Morgan anxiously exclaimed, observing her over John's shoulder. "Please, Bess, talk to me."  
  
Bess looked at John pleadingly. "'Lonz could you take Morgan outside?" the mechanic asked. As the bureaucrat opened his mouth to object, Danziger added, "Don't worry, Julia will stay with us, in case we n- need her."  
  
John turned back to meet Bess' trusting gaze and gave her fingers a gentle squeeze. "It's all right. I'll take care of her."  
  
_____  
  
Morgan was practically shoved out of the tent by Alonzo and into the worried group still congregated outside.  
  
"What the hell is happening?" he demanded, grabbing the lapels of the pilot's leather jacket and shaking him. "What is she talking about?"  
  
Alonzo was taken by surprise by the liaison's angry outburst. "Hey, take it easy," he said, effortlessly breaking Morgan's hold and pushing him away.  
  
The infuriated man charged toward him, but was caught by Walman and Baines before he could reach his destination.  
  
"No, I'm through taking it easy!" Morgan seethed. "I want some answers and I want them now!"  
  
"Back off, Morgan!" Walman hollered at the still struggling bureaucrat.  
  
"Stop it," Alonzo hissed. "This isn't helping Bess!"  
  
Morgan pried himself from the clutches of the two crewman and fussily straightened out his coat.  
  
"What's wrong with her?" he grimly asked as his fury evolved into puzzlement. "I tried talking to her when we left the campfire, but she wouldn't answer me. When we got here, I gave her a kiss on the cheek and told her that I loved her. Then, she just snapped."  
  
"And John isn't himself, either," Devon added. "Why won't you tell us what happened to them on the Dreamplane?"  
  
Solace knew that he had to remain cautious regarding what information he divulged to the colonists. Revealing the depth of Bess and Danziger's relationship along with the loss of their son and unborn daughter would only serve to hurt those around them. He also didn't want to increase Morgan's guilt by going into detail about the emotional damage done to Bess after she was propelled from the Dreamplane and lost for what had felt like months in a horrible darkness.  
  
He tried to keep his explanation as vague as possible. "Listen to me. Bess and John aren't the same people that they were six days ago. We need to give them some space so they can come to terms with what they went through."  
  
Morgan and the other Edenites were tired of getting the run-around from Alonzo and Julia every time they asked about their two sick crewmates and there was an explosion of hostile responses.  
  
"Come to terms with what?"  
  
"What a bullshit answer!"  
  
"You're still avoiding the question!"  
  
"We want specifics!"  
  
"My God, what did the Terrians do to them after we left?"  
  
"Why won't you tell us what Bess and Danziger did on the Dreamplane?"  
  
"What are you and Julia hiding from us?"  
  
"What are they hiding from us?"  
  
Alonzo's own voice became inflamed. "They're traumatized for Christ's sake! Bess and John thought that all of us were dead!"  
  
"Then, why aren't they happy to find out that we're alive?"  
  
"Yeah, you'd think they'd be glad to see us, again. Instead, they've barricaded themselves in their tent!"  
  
"Oh, give me a break!" Solace thundered at the crowd. "Where do you get off passing judgment?" He angrily pointed at them. "Are you so happy to be back? To find out that you were tricked by the Terrians? I know that you're relieved to be alive but, with the exception of Devon, you're all suffering from depression. A lot of you can't eat. Most of you have been badgering Julia for sleep-aids to get through the night."  
  
Alonzo began furiously marching, directing his rage at the Advancers as he walked among the stunned group. "Not one of you lasted on the Dreamplane for more than what you believed to be six months of your life. You left Bess and Danziger behind to bear the brunt of the Terrian's experiment. Do you have any idea what it was like for them? Do you have a clue what the experience did to their minds? Do you know the guilt and grief they went through when they thought that we'd died? How terrified they were that first winter in the cave? Both of them trying to stay alive so the other person wouldn't be left to face life by themselves? The pressure they felt knowing that the Terrians would determine whether or not humans would be allowed to settle the planet based on their actions?"  
  
He abruptly stopped and motioned his arm toward Bess and Danziger's tent behind him. "And, despite everything, they refused to give up. Bess spent fifteen years on the Dreamscape. The only reason she left when she did was because you forced her to. John was there forty-four years." The pilot tossed his hands up in the air in discouragement. "My God, after Bess died, the man didn't speak a word for almost three decades! And no matter how awful it was for him, he fought to stay alive for as long as he possibly could! He sacrificed his sanity for what he thought was the greater good!"  
  
Many of the Edenites gasped in horror at Solace's revelations while others lowered their heads in shame. Alonzo could see the effect his statements were having and he slowly regained his composure to drive the point home. "Look, I know that you're worried about them. So am I. But we need to tread very carefully here. Bess and John are emotional wrecks. Even now, they're not sure if you and I are real. Hell, they're not even sure if they're real anymore."  
  
He ran his fingers through his dark hair before continuing, "Let me talk with the Terrians tonight and see if we can figure out a way to help them. Until then, leave them alone. If the two of them want to isolate themselves from the rest of you, let them. Don't try to push them into dealing with things that they aren't ready to handle. I can't stress enough how important it is that we all be as patient as possible."  
  
They heard a rustling behind them as Julia exited the tent, squeezing between the creased opening and quickly resealing it before the others could catch a glimpse of the sick crewmembers. Although it was obvious that she was upset, the physician remained silent. Instead, she gave Alonzo a look that made it clear that she wanted to speak with him privately.  
  
Walman, still in his leadership mode from his stint on the Dreamplane, took a step forward and offered, "I think that we've had enough excitement for one evening. Why don't we all try to get some sleep." He gestured toward the pilot. "Tomorrow morning, I'm sure that Alonzo will fill us in on everything the Terrians have to say, right?"  
  
Solace nodded his agreement and, with great uneasiness, the members of Eden Project began to slowly disperse and retreat back to their own quarters. Yale took Uly and True's hand in each of his own and led them back to the Adair tent while Devon remained behind. She watched as Morgan approached Alonzo with a frightened expression on his face.  
  
"Please help her," he quietly expressed. "Bess is my life."  
  
Devon placed her arm around Morgan. "I'm sure that he and Julia are doing everything they can for them," she answered, her words of encouragement not matching the lukewarm glance that she gave the pilot.  
  
The leader was obviously miffed that Julia had an update on her patients' status and, yet again, Devon was to be locked out of the information loop. Didn't they know that she was worried about Bess and John, too, Devon inwardly steamed. Surely they realized how important Danziger had become to her. Plus, Devon didn't think that she should have to remind them that she, not Alonzo or Julia, was in charge of Eden Advance and, as such, was entitled to any knowledge pertaining to the health of her group. Yet, here she was being given the brush-off. Devon was beginning to lose control of the situation, again. And she didn't like it one bit.  
  
After determining that now was not the time to argue about the continually ignored chain of command, Devon began to steer Morgan back toward his tent thus allowing Alonzo to rejoin a troubled Julia.  
  
_____  
  
"This is all my fault," Morgan blurted out as he and Devon made their way back to the main campsite. "I should have listened to True and Uly and let Bess come out of the Dreamplane on her own."  
  
He stopped to face the leader and declared, "Alonzo didn't say it, but I know that giving Bess that stimulant made her worse. I caused her to have a nervous breakdown. My God, what was I thinking? How could I have been so selfish?"  
  
"Morgan, you weren't being selfish at all," Devon said, patting him on the shoulder. "You wanted to help your wife so you took a chance; the same chance that I would have taken with John if True hadn't insisted otherwise. You remember how afraid we were. Neither of them had moved a muscle in days and there was no sign that they were ever going to wake up. Even if the injection did cause a negative reaction, none of this is your fault. You did what you thought was best."  
  
"I made the wrong choice," he sorrowfully murmured.  
  
"Are you so sure about that?" Devon disputed before exhaling in frustration. "I don't think that John is any better off than Bess is. He's a shell of his former self. He's become withdrawn, not to mention delusional. True told me that he asked her for forgiveness because he feels responsible for killing her. Does that sound like rational behavior to you?"  
  
"But don't you see? By waking up Bess, we ended up hurting Danziger, too," Morgan relayed ashamedly. "You heard what Alonzo said. Danziger's acting this way because he spent so many years alone. Things might have been different if Bess had stayed with him on the Dreamplane."  
  
He had to admit to himself that, as much as he detested the mechanic, Morgan certainly didn't relish seeing him in the condition he was in now. And besides that, Danziger was the resident expert regarding keeping the vehicles running and his presence was crucial to Morgan and the others getting to New Pacifica. Like it or not, they needed him healthy and whole.  
  
"We don't know that," Devon said with a hint of disdain in her voice. She glared in the pilots's direction as he conferred with Julia outside of Bess and John's tent. "In case you hadn't noticed, Alonzo continued to dance around our questions the same way he has since this thing started. The only difference was that, tonight, he managed to make us feel guilty at the same time. When it comes down to it, we still know little to nothing about what John and Bess' Dreamplane lives were like."  
  
"Do we really want to know, Devon?" he posed in apprehension remembering that Danziger and his wife had spent fifteen years by themselves on the Dreamscape. While he understood that they'd had no choice but to lean on each other for support, Morgan found himself wondering more and more if the hardships they'd endured had forged a much stronger bond that they were being told about. Not only did Bess and John's reliance on each other seem to have carried over into their real lives, Morgan certainly hadn't missed the affectionate looks the two had shared earlier that evening at the campfire.  
  
Devon knew exactly what he meant because she'd also been contemplating many of the same scenarios regarding how close Danziger and the Earth-res had truly become during their time on the alternate reality. However, she acted as if she hadn't caught the bureaucrat's implication.  
  
"Of course, we do," she explained. "We can't help them if we don't know what took place."  
  
They began walking in silence, each lost in their own thoughts until they reached the entrance of Morgan's quarters. The liaison stood at the threshold of the empty tent and swallowed hard to suppress the sob that was building in his throat.  
  
"I miss her so much," he choked out. "I should have been there to support her."  
  
"I know what you mean," Devon sighed guiltily. "I feel like I abandoned John when he needed me the most."  
  
Morgan shook his head in defeat. "I feel so helpless. Those two need us now more than ever. They're just too sick to realize it." He added wistfully, "I wish that we could somehow convince them to stop pushing us away and let us be there for them."  
  
Devon's mind started working in overdrive. "There might be a way," she declared as she lifted his tent flap and motioned for him to enter.  
  
As she followed him in, she proposed, "Why don't you and I discuss some options?"  
  
_____  
  
After the other Advancers had gone, Alonzo approached an awaiting and very concerned Julia.  
  
"I guess you heard all of that, huh?" Solace remarked, suddenly feeling somewhat remorseful for angrily dressing-down the other members of Eden Project.  
  
"It was hard not to," the doctor responded as she cracked open the tent to allow Alonzo a brief peek inside. "Although Bess and Danziger seemed to have tuned it out," she added.  
  
Solace was greeted with the sight of a subdued Bess laying against Danziger who had stretched out on the cot beside her. Bess' eyes were closed and she had tightly curled her arms and legs around the weary mechanic. The pilot watched as John lightly kissed the top of her head as he soothingly stroked her arm.  
  
Alonzo shook his head and rotated his gaze back to Julia. "So you ended up having to sedate her after all," he noted in disappointment.  
  
"No. She's out like a light," she revealed. "John was able to calm her down and she fell asleep almost immediately."  
  
Alonzo let out a frustrated breath. "They're getting worse, aren't they?"  
  
Julia nodded. "Those spells Danziger's been suffering from are happening more frequently and it's getting harder and harder to bring him out of them. It's only a matter of time before he goes into one of his trances and stays there forever. Although, at this rate, I doubt that he'll live that long."  
  
She continued as a look of shock overtook the pilot's face. "Somehow, John's overall health has become that of a man twice his age. And one who hasn't taken care of himself. He's exhibiting almost all of the signs of congestive heart disease. Danziger's heart is swelling because it's working overtime to pump the oxygen he needs to his organs. His blood pressure is through the roof. His feet and ankles are already starting to swell from excess water because his kidneys aren't functioning properly. Pretty soon, his other organs will begin to fail, too." She sighed in defeat. "I've been giving him a steady dose of cardiac boosters, but they're only having temporary effects at best."  
  
"And Bess," Solace inquired.  
  
"Bess is suffering from the same problems, but to a much lesser degree. Her blood pressure is fluctuating wildly depending on her moods. She's also showing acute signs of weakness and fatigue. But, at this point, I'm most concerned about her emotional well-being. Despite this evening's outburst and her continued confusion, there's been a marked improvement in her behavior. However, if something happens to John-"  
  
She stopped, unable to finish the sentence. However, the inference was clear. After pausing a moment to collect her thoughts, she continued in exasperation, "I don't know how to stop their progression. There's absolutely no medical reason for this to be happening to them. I can only surmise that both of them have reached the limits of what they can psychologically handle. They've just been through too much."  
  
Julia peered into the tent to view her sick friends as she worriedly relayed, "We have to do something, 'Lonz. And we have to do it soon."  
  
_____  
  
Danziger nodded in a welcoming gesture to Julia and Alonzo as they reentered the dwelling and pulled up chairs next to the bunk.  
  
John wore an impassive look and kept his voice to a whisper in an effort not to awaken Bess who was still nestled against him. There was only a slight fluctuation in his tone as he offered, "T-Tell Morgan that I'm sorry that I yelled at him. I know that he meant well, but he was doing more harm than good. I had to get him outta here before Bess became completely unglued." He didn't miss the surprised expression on Julia's face as he apologized. "You know, when it c-comes down to it, Martin's not such a bad guy. I know how much he loves Bess. It's got to be rough for him to see her like this."  
  
He cast his eyes downward toward the sleeping form and sadly disclosed, "It's rough for me, too."  
  
John gingerly disentangled Bess' arms and legs from his body as he wriggled himself up to more of a seated position on the cot. "Bess keeps coming up with all of these crazy ideas about what to do. At first, she wanted you to ask the Terrians to s-send us back to the Dreamplane. She believed that we could somehow be returned to the time frame right before she was taken away. Then, we could p-pick up where her timeline left off and live out our lives the way they should have been. We'd have Adam back and she'd still be pregnant with Eben. She even suggested bringing True with us."  
  
Both Julia and Alonzo inhaled a sharp breath at the suggestion as John let out a dismayed sigh. "It took almost two days to c-convince her that there's no place to go back to. Besides, even if we could be returned to the Dreamplane, we wouldn't be able to pretend that reality didn't exist. We'd know that it wasn't real. We'd only end up living the same lie for a second time." The mechanic added in an embittered tone, "And when it was all over, we'd still wake up here."  
  
Danziger continued in a low voice, "She t-told me that she won't go with the group to New Pacifica. That this valley is her home now. She asked me to rebuild our cabin just like it was on the Dreamplane. I told her that it wouldn't be p-possible because we won't have access to the vehicles for parts, but she doesn't care. She says th-that as long as we're a family-"  
  
He let his voice trail off before muttering, "How can I tell her no when a part of me wants to do the s-same thing?"  
  
Alonzo was about to speak when Bess began to stir and slowly opened her eyes. As she lifted her head to meet his gaze, Danziger's whole demeanor changed. He greeted his wife with a pleasant smile which was equally matched by the warmth reflected in his eyes and voice.  
  
"Hey, Sleepyhead," Danziger said as he gently caressed her cheek. "You okay? Didn't have another nightmare, did you?"  
  
Bess returned his smile and snuggled in closer to him. "Mmm-mmm. I was dreaming about our garden. You know, the one next to our front door," she answered sweetly.  
  
She turned her head and noticed that they weren't alone. "You saw it when you were on the Dreamplane, didn't you, Alonzo?" she asked the pilot with innocent eyes.  
  
"Yeah, Bess, I did," he replied simply. "It was beautiful."  
  
The Earth-res' grin widened as she sat up. "Thanks. I worked really hard on it," she said cheerfully before shifting her gaze back to Danziger. "Did you keep it up after I died?"  
  
John's eyes bulged and the muscles in his jaw clenched for a moment before he was able to recover from her question. "I sure tried, Bess, but I wasn't exactly blessed with the s-same green-thumb that you were," he responded softly as he placed his arm around her shoulders. "After awhile, those rose bushes of yours ended up taking over the whole space. Eventually, they wrapped themselves around the side of the house, too."  
  
Bess seemed satisfied as she pictured their cabin outlined with the brightly colored blooms. "Good. Those were always my favorites, anyway."  
  
"I know, Sweetheart," John muttered as he remembered the hundreds of times he'd placed the flowers on her and his children's graves.  
  
Bess was examining the mixture of emotion displayed on her husband's face when something else caught her eye. "Your scar's gone," she realized in befuddlement as she brushed away the dirty-blond curls that covered his forehead. "The one you got from the solar panel when you slipped on the roof."  
  
"Uh-huh," he answered plainly.  
  
Her fingers glided from his absent scar to touch his stubbled cheek. "You're younger, too," Bess exclaimed with a twinge of wonderment.  
  
"Right again. In fact, we both are," John responded. He leaned forward and lightly tapped his finger on her nose to emphasize each word. "But I'm still too old for you," he declared with a raised eyebrow.  
  
"Yeah and I still have terrible taste in husbands," she teased, breaking out into chuckles.  
  
Danziger threw his head back and rolled his eyes in mock annoyance. "Don't I know it," he smirked as she pulled his head downward to share a gentle kiss.  
  
"I love you," Bess said devotedly as they parted.  
  
"And I love you, too," he expressed before brushing his lips across hers once more. "Now go back to sleep."  
  
The mechanic started to shift his body toward the edge of the bed as he suggested, "You want me to move to the other cot so we don't disturb you?"  
  
"No, please," she blurted out as she urgently grabbed at his shirt. "Please don't move. Just stay here and hold me." She flung her arms around John as he quickly retreated back to his original position in the bunk. "Please don't let me go," she begged in a soft voice as she laid her head on his chest.  
  
Danziger drew her close and tightened his grip around her. "Okay, Bess," he whispered as she shut her eyes. "I won't let you go."  
  
John wove his fingers through Bess' hair and patiently waited for her to return to her slumber. When he was finally rewarded with the dulcet melody of her snores, he turned his head back toward Julia and Alonzo. He looked absolutely exhausted and his voice had returned to nearly a monotone.  
  
"It's so hard to see her this way," he said dolefully. "Bess was always the strong one. Those first years, she k-kept me going even when I was ready to give up." He let out a dispirited snort. "Trust me, I didn't make it easy for her, either. She helped me learn to forgive the Terrians for what they did to you all. She helped me learn to f-forgive myself. It's because of her, I was able to face losing True and Devon and move on with my life. She saved me."  
  
His gaze fell to the floor as he choked out, "N-Now she needs me to save her and I have no idea what to do. I can't even take care of myself."  
  
Alonzo arched forward in his seat to regain the mechanic's attention. "I'm going to talk with the Terrians tonight," he relayed. "Uly said that there might be a chance that they can help you after all."  
  
"Good," Danziger replied, faintly nodding. "You gotta convince them to do something. I don't know, maybe take us away or m-make us forget. But they have to try."  
  
He exhaled deeply before admitting, "Bess was right when she said that we don't belong here anymore. I-I don't know where I am most of the time. All of those years alone has done s-something to my mind. I was looking at the 'Rover tonight and it occurred to me that I wouldn't be able to fix it if it broke down. I don't remember m-most of my mechanic skills. Even if I could travel, I'm completely useless to the group. It's just been too long."  
  
His eyes returned to the ground and Julia and Alonzo could barely hear his agonized disclosure. "I'm t-t-terrified to leave this tent. You're all ghosts to me. Reminders of a life th-that doesn't exist anymore. I try to tell myself that this," he motioned with his free hand around the room, "that this is real. That I'm really here." He let out a defeated breath. "Sometimes it even works for awhile. But usually, it d-doesn't. Most of the time, I'm just going through the motions. I don't know if Bess is real either. God knows that I w-want her to be."  
  
John rotated his gaze back to his wife and tenderly touched her face as he conceded, "Right now, the only thing that I'm sure of is that I can't lose her again."  
  
__________ 


	17. 17/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 17  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
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The following morning, Bess seemed to be doing quite well emotionally. She was cognitive of where she was and understood the specifics of what had happened to her and the others over the past seven days. Additionally, she surprised Danziger and Julia by asking the doctor to accompany her to the river for a quick bath before breakfast. Although the soundness of Bess' psychological state was almost certainly a temporary condition, neither could see any reason not to take advantage of it. Furthermore, John was pleased that his wife was willing to spend time apart from him and was becoming more comfortable with Julia's presence. He was hopeful that, as time progressed and her health strengthened, Bess would begin to accept the support of the rest of the colonists as well.  
  
After making him promise that he would bathe at the river when she returned and after Alonzo awoke from his conference with the Terrians, Bess gave John a quick kiss and set off for the western forest with Julia. As they wandered down the path, Bess was in awe at the differences between the valley on the Dreamplane and the valley that she was living in now. Not only had all of the snow vanished, but the trees were younger. She momentarily paused as she came upon a cluster of oak trees that, if memory served, her husband had cut down for firewood three years earlier. She remembered the day that she, John and Adam had planted saplings to replenish the resources they had taken.  
  
Looking around her, Bess decided that she liked the woods on the Dreamplane much better. In truth, Bess liked just about everything on the Dreamscape much more than in the reality which she currently existed. After all, the Dreamplane had her cabin, her greenhouse, her gardens, her rocking chair, her children...  
  
Bess shook her head to steady herself and retain control of her emotions. She'd always prided herself on being a practical person and facing her problems. However, that was before she had been torn from the Dreamplane and her perfect world had been stolen out from under her. And it was certainly before she had been imprisoned in that horrifying state of nothingness. Those memories of her final torturous months entrapped in the dark were so intense that she was still unable to speak about it.  
  
The pain in her heart ached so badly that she could hardly bear it. Part of her wanted to run away screaming as fast as she could. Another part of her just wanted to disappear entirely. She was immensely thankful for John's continued presence in the demolished ruins of what was once her happy life. Bess attributed his unconditional love and support as the only thing preventing her from disintegrating into complete insanity.  
  
When they finally reached the banks of the alcove, the Earth-res studied Julia intently. Bess wanted to hate the physician for her part in destroying her contented world, but found that she couldn't. She knew how truly sorry Julia was and that her intentions had been honorable, though the consequences of the doctor's actions had proven to be devastating. This was one of the reasons that Bess had requested to meet with Julia privately. Bess hoped to use Julia's guilty conscience and her desire to rectify the damage she'd caused to her advantage.  
  
Almost since the moment she'd been forced to return to her conscious existence, the Earth-res had been contemplating ways to return to the Dreamplane. For days, she'd unsuccessfully tried to persuade John that the Terrians were the key to transporting them back home to reclaim their lives. However, her husband had refused to be swayed on the issue, leaving Bess to grapple for other avenues to achieve the objective. And now Bess was convinced that she had finally found the answer. It was so simple that she couldn't believe that she'd not considered it before. If injecting stimulants into their bodies could remove them from the Dreamplane, then it was probable that sedatives could send them back.  
  
Bess hoped that Julia would be willing to assist her, John and possibly True by supplying them with the necessary medicine to enable them to attain their goal. However, Bess had already decided that, if Julia refused to help them, she would have no choice but to take matters into her own hands. After all, Bess noted, the doctor couldn't possibly keep track of her medical bag twenty-four hours a day.  
  
  
  
"I love it up here," Bess sighed peacefully as she submerged herself in the warm water.  
  
"It's a wonderful spot," Julia answered as she disrobed and joined her. She made sure not to venture too far away from the river's edge. The doctor wanted to stay close to her med-kit, just in case it was needed.  
  
"It feels so strange to bathe out in the open instead of using our bathtub," Bess commented before quizzically turning her gaze skyward toward the rising summer sun. "It's so hot out, too. In my memories of this place, winter was just coming to an end. The last time we were up here, John and Adam were ice-skating."  
  
Julia's head angled backward in surprise. "Danziger can ice-skate?" she said incredulously. She would have paid an untold amount of credits to have witnessed that debacle.  
  
Bess laughed, "Oh, sure, although it wasn't easy to convince him to do it. You should have seen him the first time he tried it. He griped the whole time I led him around the ice."  
  
"I can imagine," the physician said with a small chuckle.  
  
Bess grinned from ear to ear as she reminisced. "It was actually kind of comical. He got the hang of it eventually." She winked suggestively and added, "He's pretty agile for a guy his size."  
  
Julia's posturing relayed her continued awkwardness about Bess and John's current romantic status. Bess picked up on this immediately and waded toward her, remarking sympathetically, "This must be throwing you for quite a loop, huh? Everyone waking up from the Dreamplane with drastic changes in their personalities. Some of them still look at you and Alonzo as if you're dead. Suddenly, half the camp has paired off with each other. A few of us have even changed partners. It's probably pretty surreal for you."  
  
"It's definitely been quite a week," the doctor agreed, nodding her head.  
  
Bess' attention was captured by the squawking sound of a faraway bird which resonated throughout the valley. It had been years since she'd seen a bird or any other animal and she looked up in curiosity in the hopes of stealing a glimpse of the creature. When the visual search turned up empty and the echoes faded into the distance, she disappointedly returned her gaze downward. Catching sight of her reflection, she reached out and lightly touched the water, causing a rippling effect and distorting her image.  
  
She stared in wonderment at her garbled reflection, exclaiming, "It's so hard for me to believe that eight days ago, I was twenty-four years old and married to Morgan."  
  
"Bess, you still are twenty-four years old," Julia responded straightforwardly. "And you're still married to Morgan."  
  
Bess lifted her head to face the physician. "Not in my mind. Not in my heart," she answered resolutely. "I don't care what I look like on the outside. It's the inside that counts. I am a thirty-nine year old woman and I am the wife of John Danziger, not Morgan Martin."  
  
She continued in a serious tone, "I did love Morgan once. He's the reason that I'm here on this planet and I'll always be grateful to him for that. If I hadn't been married to Morgan, I would never have met John."  
  
Julia exhaled deeply and diverted her gaze, not knowing what to say.  
  
"I know that you don't understand it, this bond that John and I have," Bess explained in an effort to convince the doctor. "It goes so much deeper than love. Even before the last of you died, John had become my best friend. He was my confidant. He put my grief over losing Morgan before his own loss. Of course, I knew that it was partly an avoidance tactic so he could hide from his own feelings, but talking to him helped me more than you could ever imagine. And, eventually, he let me help him work through his grief, too. That first winter in the cave, he had the chance to leave the Dreamplane, but chose to stay behind so I wouldn't be alone. He's the first person who I have ever been able to completely depend on. And John always puts me first, whether I want him to or not. Even now, he's putting my pain before his own."  
  
Bess' expression darkened and the corners of her mouth arched downward as she expressed, "He's hurting so much, Julia. He's trying to hide it because he doesn't want to worry me, but I can see it in his eyes. I can hear it in his voice."  
  
The Earth-res shook her head and continued in a concerned voice, "You know, John and I haven't made love since we've gotten back. And it's not for my lack of trying, believe me. But he pushes me away every time I approach him about it. He tries to shrug it off saying that there's too much going on right now. Sometimes, he says that it's been too long for him and he's pretty much forgotten how to have sex anyway. Once he even used the excuse that I'm still legally married to Morgan and making love to me would be considered adultery in the eyes of God." She exited the water and began to roughly replace her clothing as she added tartly, "Well, I certainly gave him my two-cents on how I feel about that."  
  
"How do you feel, Bess?" Julia inquired as she followed suit and started to redress as well.  
  
"I told him that there was no God. I mean, there just couldn't be," she said sharply as she poked her head and arms through the holes of her shirt. Her voice rose slightly as she related, "The God that I grew up believing in wouldn't just sit back and watch our lives being destroyed over and over again. He wouldn't take away our children just for the sake of taking them. And the God that I thought existed certainly wouldn't let my husband suffer in agony by himself for thirty years."  
  
She unsuccessfully blinked back her tears as she struggled with her anguish. "No one- not even the worst penal colonist, not even Gaal- deserves what John was put through."  
  
Bess stopped to take several deep breaths in an effort to reign in her despair. Once she had composed herself, she stated bluntly, "And if there is a God, then I don't want any part of Him. I'll never forgive Him for His cruelty."  
  
She harshly seated herself on her favorite overturned tree trunk and began to lace up her boots. After a few moments of soulful contemplation, Bess' sorrowful expression changed to one of absolute assuredness.  
  
"You know what?" she expressed confidently as she brushed away her tears. "I prefer to put my faith in John. He's never deserted me in my time of need. He's the one who protects and takes care of me. He's the reason that I'm alive."  
  
She stood and helped Julia to her own feet before asserting with conviction, "And I'll do whatever it takes to protect him, too."  
  
_____  
  
Devon excitedly rose from her bed bright and early that morning, despite having spent half the night in Morgan's quarters conferring on how to best help their two loved ones. Indeed, some important decisions had been made. Decisions that had serious short and long term consequences.  
  
As she wandered along the edge of camp, Devon observed Julia and Bess setting out toward the banks of the river. What a lucky break, the leader thought to herself. She would never have guessed that an opportunity like this would present itself so soon. It was the perfect time to put the first stages of her and Morgan's plan into action.  
  
Devon peered around her to ensure that she went unnoticed and began to make her way toward Danziger's refuge. Her first stop was the med-tent to confirm that Solace was still sleeping soundly, thus allowing her to accomplish what she needed to do without his unwanted interruptions.  
  
That task completed, she crept to John's quarters and cautiously entered without announcing herself. She was relieved to find Danziger alone, lying flat on his back in his cot with his fingers firmly clasped behind his head. He was fully dressed with the exception of his shoes. His razor and a used basin of soapy water were set on the makeshift dresser beside his bunk. Devon carefully seated herself next to him on the edge of his mattress. It was only then that she noticed that John was awake, his wide-open blue eyes intently focusing on the stark, nylon ceiling above him.  
  
"Good morning, Danziger. Can I speak to you a minute?" she beckoned, trying to sound as cheerful as possible.  
  
He didn't respond to her voice. In fact, he didn't seem to notice that she was there at all.  
  
"Danziger," she tried again. "John? John?"  
  
She tentatively reached out and brushed the tangled curls off of his forehead. Abruptly, the mechanic's hand flew to his face and caught her hand, pushing it away from him. Devon suspected that he would be angry at her invasion of his personal space. Instead, he greeted her with frightened eyes.  
  
"D-Devon," he stammered out. "I don't think you're s-supposed to be here."  
  
Devon shrugged her shoulders and attempted to be nonchalant. "I know, but since when have I ever followed orders?" she replied with a raised eyebrow. "Besides, I really need to talk with you and this'll only take a second."  
  
Danziger was confused. He hurriedly scanned the room and realized that he was alone with Devon, or at least an image that resembled Devon. He wasn't really sure which at this point. He apprehensively moved to the sitting position and readied himself for what the apparition of his former employer had come to tell him.  
  
Now that she had his attention, Devon nervously cleared her throat and began, "John, you've obviously been through a terrible experience. I'm sure that things seem kind of strange to you and it's going to take awhile for things to get back to normal."  
  
He just stared at her in silence.  
  
"You know, True's been staying with me in my tent these past few days. One of the few bright spots in this whole mess is that she and I have gotten the chance to spend a lot of time together." Devon added with a small grin, "That's one terrific little girl you have there."  
  
Her smile disappeared as she watched Danziger's eyes fill with sadness.  
  
"Yeah, she was a great kid," he whispered evenly.  
  
His choice of tenses when referring to his daughter threw Devon further off-balance and she quickened the pace of her speech. "Anyway, True and I have gotten much closer. In fact, I would go so far as to say that I've begun to think of her as more of a daughter. And I know that Uly is already like a son to you."  
  
John showed no sign of acknowledgment to her admission as she continued, "So, I was thinking that maybe we should combine our tents together so the four of us can live under one roof. Of course, in the beginning, Uly and True should probably stay with Yale until things settle down a bit."  
  
Danziger's head tilted back slightly and his brows furrowed in perplexity. Devon forced him to look her in the eyes as she took his quivering hand in her own and dove in with both feet.  
  
"I care about you very deeply, John. I'm not expecting a physical relationship with you. I don't expect anything from you at all. I just want to be with you," Devon confessed in earnest. "From the day we crashed here, you've been there for me. As a matter of fact, you've always given one hundred percent of yourself when it comes to making sure that the entire group is taken care of. Even now, I can see how protective you are of Bess. So, I've talked with Morgan and he agrees that we should keep our tents close together so she can spend as much time as she needs with you. We're going to ask Julia to put her tent near us, too."  
  
The mechanic shook his head as he tried to make sense of her disclosure. "I d-don't understand," he muttered.  
  
Devon placed her other hand gently under his chin and brought his gaze back to her. Danziger could only sit there in shock as she lovingly traced the line of his jaw with her fingers until her hand rested soundly on his shoulder. He realized that Devon's hands were shaking a bit, too.  
  
"I'm saying that we're going to help you. Morgan is going to look after Bess and I am going to look after you," Devon proclaimed as her hand left his shoulder and slid down his arm to grasp his other hand. "You and I will get through this together," she solemnly decreed, giving his fingers a determined squeeze.  
  
Danziger attempted to retreat from her hold. "You c-can't help me, Devon," he staggered out, still completely befuddled. Could this really be happening?  
  
She tightened her grip. "I can try. Please let me try," she implored, her words becoming increasingly urgent. "And if you aren't well by the time we get to New Pacifica, I'll consult with Dr. Vasquez when the colony ship arrives and see if he has any ideas for your treatment."  
  
"N-New Pacifica?" John questioned, blinking several times. Beads of sweat were beginning to form on his brow.  
  
"And if he can't help, maybe the doctors back on the Stations can."  
  
Danziger's eyes narrowed as what she was saying began to sink in. "Just what are you t-telling me?"  
  
Devon looked at him with both affection and a fierce resolve. She took a deep breath and went for broke. "I'm saying that after the colony is set up and the Syndrome children are healed, my work here will be done."  
  
Devon let go of his hands and grabbed him firmly by both shoulders. "Think about it, John. Uly is healthy and I will have accomplished everything that I set out to do. They wouldn't really need me, anymore. All of us can return to the Stations and make a life for ourselves. We can get you the help that you need."  
  
Danziger gaped openmouthed at her as she added, "Besides, we wouldn't be the only ones going back. As angry as everyone is at the Terrians right now, I wouldn't be surprised if most of Eden Advance decides to leave when the Jamestown arrives."  
  
John was absolutely floored by her selfless proposal. The idea that she would willingly give up so much for him was astounding. Perhaps she had loved him, too, all of those years ago, he reflected to himself.  
  
He attempted to shake himself back to coherent thought. If this was indeed real, John knew that he could never let Devon abandon her life's work for him. Too much had changed. Not only did he no longer love her, he knew that his own days were numbered.  
  
Danziger removed her hands from his shoulders and unsteadily rose to his feet in order to widen the distance between them. Perspiration trickled down his face and his heart pounded loudly in his chest as he paced about the room, struggling for the right words. It was time to clear the air and fill Devon in regarding his Dreamplane experiences and the severity of his current condition. He felt that he owed her that much.  
  
"Devon," he began softly, "I appreciate what you're t-trying to do, believe me, but this won't work."  
  
"But it will work," she insisted as, she too, jumped to her feet. "Just give me a chance to show you."  
  
He turned away from her and his voice became strained. "No, you d- don't understand. I can't go with you to New Pacifica."  
  
She took a confident stride toward him. "Of course you can go because True, Uly and I will be there with you every step of the way," Devon willfully pronounced. "In fact, we're leaving this morning."  
  
"What?" he shouted in alarm as he whipped around to face her.  
  
She attempted to ignore Danziger's mortified expression and voice as he reacted to her words. "The faster we get you out of this valley and away from this group of Terrians, the safer you'll be," she asserted, using her most pragmatic tone. "True and I will come back after breakfast to help you pack up your things. Morgan will be by later to pick up Bess' belongings. After that, I'll send Magus and Walman to take down your tent."  
  
John staggered back, his mind spinning out of control over the possible harmful repercussions Devon's decision could have on Bess' health. Paranoia reigned supreme when he suddenly realized that his wife was nowhere to be found. How long had she been gone? Had the others already put their plan in motion and split them apart from each other? Where had they taken her, his deluded mind fearfully posed.  
  
"No, no, no, NO, NO!" he repeated, his quiet pleas evolving into screams. He lurched forward toward the stunned leader and roared, "Y-Y-You can't do this!"  
  
Devon could see and feel Danziger's body rocking with shivers as he harshly seized her by the arms and shouted at the top of his lungs, "Where is she? Why c-can't you just leave us alone?"  
  
Devon was cemented in place, too shocked to answer him. She found that she could only stare helplessly into John's furious and terrified eyes.  
  
"What are you doing in here?" Alonzo angrily challenged Devon as he stormed into the tent.  
  
Danziger released Devon from his clutches and turned to the pilot, begging in a distressed voice, "You g-gotta stop her, 'Lonz! They've separated Bess and me! She s-says that we're leaving today!" He added in exasperation, "Y-You promised us that this wouldn't happen!"  
  
Solace glared at Devon before reassuring the mechanic, "No one is going anywhere and no one is going to split the two of you up, okay?"  
  
"Th-Then where is B-Bess?" he asked as his shudders increased in intensity.  
  
"I saw her leave with Julia about twenty minutes ago," Devon was finally able to answer. "It looked to me like they were going to the river to bathe."  
  
"You see? Everything's okay. I'm sure that they'll be back any second," the pilot placated.  
  
As Alonzo turned to Devon and the two began a heated exchange with each other, Danziger slowly withdrew backward until he felt the metal frame of his cot jutting against his legs. He seated himself and sank his head into his hands with his elbows resting on his knees. Perspiration poured down his face and he closed his eyes in an effort to ward off the dizziness that now engulfed him. The thunderous pounding in his ears made it difficult to distinguish Alonzo and Devon's hostile conversation only a few feet away. Soon, he wasn't able to hear them at all.  
  
Bess will be safe. Everything will be all right, John said to himself over and over again. He knew that forcing Bess to leave the valley before she was emotionally ready would have a terrible effect on her. But Julia and Alonzo understood this, too and, somehow, they would be able to convince Devon that they couldn't leave. At least, not yet.  
  
Eventually, True will be okay, too, he rationalized. As much as he would have liked to see his daughter one more time, he knew that it was in her best interests that he stayed away from her. Danziger was hopeful that she would remember him as the man he once was instead of the unbalanced person he'd become in his final days. He also hoped that she would someday forgive him for leaving her like this.  
  
John's thoughts drifted to Devon. He was glad to hear that she now considered True to be like a daughter to her. That would make the transition much easier when she took over the responsibility of raising her. Of course, Danziger would have preferred for his wife to take custody of True after he was gone, but Bess needed to concentrate on her own recovery. Morgan will probably be a big help to Bess, too. He still cares for her and will see to it that she lives a good life. Maybe Bess will fall back in love with him and they'll remarry someday. Perhaps she'll even have more children, John speculated as he unsuccessfully battled to obtain a full breath.  
  
After a time, he let go and allowed himself to surrender to the overwhelming anguish and exhaustion he'd been fighting for days. His trembling ceased.  
  
_____  
  
Meanwhile, Danziger's presence was all but forgotten as Alonzo and Devon argued just inside the doorway of the tent. Neither showed any signs of stopping as their ire increased with each syllable.  
  
"Why are you telling him that we aren't leaving?" Devon spat angrily.  
  
The pilot shot back hotly, "Because we're not!"  
  
Devon dug her balled fists deep into her hips. "Excuse me, but the last time I checked, I was in charge of Eden Advance. How dare you-"  
  
Solace irately pointed at her, interrupting, "When are you going to get it through your head that this isn't about you or what you want, huh? This is about Bess and John!"  
  
"Don't you think I know that?" The leader's eyes stared daggers as she seethed, "And I also know that we can't stay in these mountains forever!"  
  
"I'm telling you that neither of them are in any condition to go anywhere right now!"  
  
"Well, when will they be ready to travel?" She cynically added, "Or do you expect us to leave them behind?"  
  
_____  
  
As Julia and Bess made their way back up the trail, the Earth-res was inwardly kicking herself for becoming so emotional while at the river. It had caused her to temporarily postpone her plans to ask Julia for her aid in sending her and John back to the Dreamplane. Bess hoped that she would get another chance soon. She couldn't wait to take her husband home and put this whole nightmare behind them.  
  
The two were about twenty-five yards from the tent when the angry voices of Alonzo and Devon reached their ears. The pair traded a nervous glance before breaking into a sprint to reach the dwelling as quickly as possible.  
  
"What's going on? What happened?" Julia interrupted them as she and Bess entered.  
  
Alonzo and Devon both began yelling at once, each furiously explaining their side of the story to the doctor. Bess ignored them and immediately rushed passed the group to Danziger's cot where the mechanic was silently seated with his head still buried in his hands.  
  
"John? John, Honey?" she said as she gingerly tugged on his arms by the wrist in encouragement for him to lift his head to meet her gaze.  
  
However, as she pulled upward, Danziger slumped back and landed on the mattress with a thud. Bess' blood ran cold when she realized that his eyes were closed and his skin was white as a sheet. And he wasn't breathing.  
  
"JULIA!"  
  
The arguing stopped as both Bess and Julia sprang into action. Instinct took over as the physician dove into her med-bag to retrieve her Diaglove while Bess began to administer CPR, a technique taught to her by Danziger during their time on the Dreamplane.  
  
"John, please don't do this," Bess muttered just before pinching his nose and blowing three quick puffs of air into his mouth.  
  
At the same time, Julia scanned Danziger's motionless body to confirm her diagnosis. "How long has he been down?" she asked Alonzo and Devon.  
  
"Down?" Alonzo echoed in amazement. "We were just talking to him a few minutes ago," he said, looking at Devon who seemed to be unable to move.  
  
"Exactly how many minutes?" Julia snapped, her patience long gone.  
  
"I don't know. Maybe two at the most," the pilot responded.  
  
Bess was about to begin chest compressions when Julia stopped her. "Wait. This is more effective," she told the Earth-res as she placed the Diaglove on his chest and implemented the equipment's cardio-vert function. The shock sent a charge of energy surging through Danziger's body and he convulsed violently. Julia hurriedly repeated the process twice more without the wanted result.  
  
"Dammit!" the doctor yelled as she tossed her Diaglove to the side and replunged into her medical kit. As she searched for the right remedy, Bess fell to her knees beside Danziger's cot and whispered words of encouragement into his ear.  
  
"Come on, John, breathe," Bess quietly pleaded as she smoothed back his hair. "Wake up. Please don't leave me. I need you too much."  
  
After finding and loading the hypospray, Julia ripped open Danziger's sweat-soaked shirt with the intention of injecting the medicine directly into his heart. However, just as she placed the instrument against his skin, John's chest stirred and he inhaled a healthy gulp of air. The color began to return to his face as Julia again donned her Diaglove to affirm that his vital signs were rising, though they tapered off at a level still far below normal.  
  
"Will he wake up soon?" Bess asked Julia as she sat mesmerized by the rise and fall of John's chest.  
  
As if on cue, Danziger's eyelids started to flicker, eventually lifting to reveal his wearied blue eyes. Devon darted toward his cot, but halted when the mechanic feebly reached out for Bess' hand instead.  
  
"Hi, Bess," John softly greeted as his mouth creased upward into a frail smile.  
  
The Earth-res immediately burst into tears and flung herself into his arms.  
  
"It's all right, Babe. Everything's okay," John soothed as she buried her face into his neck.  
  
After a few moments of John comforting her with his words and touch, Bess raised her head to view his tired features.  
  
"I was so scared. Please- Please don't leave me," she cried as the tears cascaded down her cheeks.  
  
"I'm trying not to, Bess," Danziger murmured, briefly trading a look of hopelessness with Julia.  
  
Bess placed her cheek against his bare chest, covering his heart. "You're my life," she expressed with emotion, unknowingly parroting Morgan's description of her from the prior evening.  
  
John responded by enclosing the Earth-res in his arms and gently kissing the top of her curls. Considerably weakened by the morning's events, he shut his eyes and fell asleep almost instantly.  
  
Julia, who was also visibly shaken, turned to Devon and Alonzo and quietly addressed, "I need to run some tests on both of them now. It would be best if we had some privacy."  
  
Solace nodded and lightly tugged on Devon's elbow to encourage her to follow him. She gradually staggered backwards to the exit, her gaze remaining fixed on Bess and John until she was well out the door.  
  
"Come on, let's get back to camp," Solace suggested as Julia lowered the tent flap behind them.  
  
Devon remained stationary with her back to the pilot, staring morosely at the closed door to the dwelling.  
  
"Devon, let's go," he, again, prompted, taking a step toward her.  
  
The leader slowly turned to face him, looking as though she'd been struck by a sledgehammer. Her bottom lip shook and her eyes were shining with tears. She'd obviously confirmed what she'd suspected about the intensity of Bess and John's attachment to each other. But Devon had also experienced a moment of clarity regarding a bigger, much graver, issue.  
  
"He's going to die, isn't he?" she whispered in a trembling voice.  
  
Solace held her distressed gaze. "If we don't do something, yeah," he answered.  
  
"And Bess?" Devon asked as she wrapped her arms in front of her, hugging herself tightly.  
  
Alonzo nodded sadly in affirmation that the Earth-res' future was also very likely in jeopardy.  
  
Devon was barely able to get out the words. "Can we stop it from happening?" she asked grimly.  
  
Alonzo sighed as he called to mind his latest discussion with the Terrians. "There might be a way," he said, glancing toward the main campsite that was gradually coming to life behind them. "But it's not going to be easy and we're going to need the cooperation of every single person here to do it. Even then, it still may not work," he cautioned.  
  
Upon hearing the pilot's disclosure, Devon stifled her sobs, along with her feelings of discouragement. There was no place for that kind of thinking right now. Not if there was still a chance to save the man that she loved. She briefly closed her eyes in deep concentration as she emotionally transformed herself back into the dauntless leader that she knew would be required.  
  
There was a renewed determination in her voice as she commanded to Alonzo, "Just tell me what has to be done."  
  
_____  
  
Approximately an hour later, most of Eden Advance was gathered in the meal tent to learn the possible answer to their dilemma. Yale, having already been filled in and given his approval of the Terrian's solution, had taken the children on a nature walk to prevent them from hearing anything upsetting. Bess and John were also absent from the meeting and remained in their quarters. The Earth-res diligently watched over the man whom she considered to be her spouse as he recuperated from his earlier collapse. Julia had hesitated to leave them alone, but Bess promised the doctor that she would alert her via gear if Danziger took a turn for the worse. Besides, she insisted, Julia's presence would be needed to assist Alonzo and Devon in explaining what would be expected of the colonists if they proceeded forward with the Terrian's idea.  
  
As the three presented the proposal to the group, there were some mixed reactions to say the least.  
  
"They're gonna what?" Mazatl snapped in amazement.  
  
"Look, I'm not exactly sure how they're going to do it," Alonzo explained, "but, somehow, the Terrians are prepared to make us forget about this entire week."  
  
"They're gonna erase our minds?" Magus said, uncomfortably. "They can do that?"  
  
"Apparently so," Devon answered, looking a bit nervous, herself.  
  
"And we won't remember anything?"  
  
"That's right," Alonzo agreed.  
  
Cameron blurted out, "I don't think I want the Terrians to get inside my head like that."  
  
"Why not?" Baines grilled. "They were inside your head when they sent you to the Dreamplane."  
  
"Exactly my point," Cameron's voice raised uncharacteristically. "And I don't want them in there, again. They've done enough damage!"  
  
"We don't have much of a choice here," Julia asserted, calling their attention back to the front of the room. "John has already reached a critical stage and he and Bess are getting weaker by the minute."  
  
"What are you talking about?" Walman scoffed as he stood up. "I mean, I know that they seem to be missing a few of their marbles-"  
  
"Are you kidding?" Baines interrupted. "Bess is acting nuttier than when she had that flower pollen living inside her." He missed the dirty looks of Morgan and several others as he added, "And Danziger's practically a zombie."  
  
Walman shook his head and decided to rephrase his own remarks. "I'm not saying that there isn't something wrong with them. But I think that we may be overreacting a bit here." He shrugged as he offered, "I bet that, with a little time and patience, they'll eventually come out of it on their own."  
  
"No, they won't," Julia opposed. "Bess and Danziger are very sick. And if we don't act quickly, both of them are going to die."  
  
Over the murmurs of the colonists, Denner questioned, "Wait a minute. I know that they've been behaving strangely, but we're talking about emotional pain. How can that kill them?"  
  
"What we're talking about here is severe mental illness," Julia clarified. "And now it's reached the point where they've become a danger to themselves."  
  
"Are you saying that they're suicidal?"  
  
"In a manner of speaking, yes," the physician nodded as she tried to make eye contact with each person in the room. "Both of them have reached their breaking point and their minds and bodies are beginning to shut down. Basically, the two of them are willing themselves to die."  
  
"Oh my God," Magus exclaimed worriedly. "Do they even know that they're doing this?"  
  
Alonzo stepped forward. "John understands what's happening and he's trying to fight it the best he can. But he knows that it's a losing battle." He sighed before speculating, "I think the only reason that he's still here at all is because he's trying to save Bess."  
  
Julia solemnly added, "You should know that Danziger had a very close call this morning. We were lucky enough to get to him in time. But, if things stay the way they are, we're just putting off the inevitable." As she finished speaking, the doctor noticed Devon blink back a tear.  
  
"What about Bess?" Denner inquired.  
  
"She's well aware that she's teetering on the brink of sanity. She's also frightened by John's declining health. However, I don't think that she understands how serious their conditions really are," Julia explained. "I do know that, when one of them dies, the other will most likely follow very soon afterward."  
  
The Edenites stared at her in silence as they absorbed the gravity of their friends' situation.  
  
Julia knew that this was no time to be diplomatic. The circumstances were too precarious for her to hold back on what would occur if strong measures weren't taken soon.  
  
She continued, "Danziger will probably succumb first. When that happens, I think that Bess will essentially curl up into a ball and die." She watched Morgan's eye's narrow as the doctor revealed, "It's also within the realm of possibility that she will attempt something drastic in order to hasten her death."  
  
The bureaucrat flew to his feet. "I've had just about enough of this garbage," he angrily challenged as he made his way to the front of the room. "I'm not going to sit here and listen to you discuss when and why my wife is going to kill herself," he disputed as he stood in front of Julia and animatedly tossed his hands into the air. "Don't you know how ridiculous this all sounds? She's Catholic for goodness sake. She would never do anything that would cause her soul to be sent to Hell."  
  
Julia grabbed one of his flailing arms by the wrist and announced, "Morgan, when Bess woke up from the Dreamplane, she not only renounced Catholicism, she renounced God. She no longer believes in Hell."  
  
"That can't be true," he declared, wearing a shocked expression.  
  
"I'm afraid that it is," Julia gloomily confirmed as she let go of his arm. "I'm sorry to be so brutal, but I need you to understand what we're dealing with here. Bess is emotionally unstable. She's not thinking with a clear mind anymore."  
  
Morgan sank into a nearby chair. "This can't be happening," he muttered as Walman patted his shoulder in support.  
  
"What can we do?" Cameron asked bleakly.  
  
Alonzo answered, "We do what the Terrians proposed."  
  
Devon took center stage and explained in a forthright tone, "It's going to take all of us working together. We have to put everything back as closely as we can to the way things were last week."  
  
She turned her attention to specific members of her crew and directed, "I'm sorry Magus, but you and Walman are going to have to move back to your original tents. The same goes for Denner and Cameron."  
  
Both couples exchanged looks of bewilderment.  
  
"You mean, we won't remember our relationship?" Magus said in surprise. "Even the one we've had since we returned from the Dreamplane?"  
  
"That's exactly what I'm saying. We can't have any reminders of the last eight days. We could accidentally trigger someone's memory and it would cause a snowball effect. We'd end up exactly where we are right now."  
  
Magus laid her head against Walman's shoulder as he questioned, "Why can't the Terrians just take away Bess and Danziger's memories?"  
  
Alonzo replied, "Because it's too risky. One accidental slip could open the flood gates and bring everything crashing back. We honestly don't know what would happen to them."  
  
"It could literally kill them," Julia added.  
  
Denner posed, "If we all agreed to this, when would the Terrians do it?"  
  
"Tomorrow morning. We would also need be packed up and ready to go. I want to get us out of this mountain range as fast as possible to keep anyone's memory from being jogged," Alonzo responded.  
  
"This is some messed up shit," Baines murmured under his breath.  
  
"Aren't we going to be kind of confused when we suddenly wake up with our bags packed?" Mazatl asked. "And how are we going to account for the missing time?"  
  
"I've thought of all of that and I've already come up with a solution," Solace said as he folded his arms and tried to exude as much confidence as possible. "One of us will retain the events of the past week and guide us all to safety."  
  
"Who?"  
  
"Me," Alonzo declared over the pessimistic whispers of the others. "Think about it. I'm the one who dreams with the Terrians and we'll need to work together to make sure that everything goes smoothly. Plus, I'm also the only one who knows the complete story of the past week. I'll be able to explain away almost everything to keep you from discovering the truth."  
  
"You won't be able to explain all of it," Baines countered.  
  
The pilot assured, "I realize that and I'm going to have to tiptoe very carefully around you all when it comes to what you're told. I'm also willing to bet that one or more of you will want to launch an investigation into finding out what really happened to us. And I'm guessing that those people will be Devon, Morgan, Julia and, possibly, John."  
  
Julia opened her mouth to protest, but halted when she recognized that he was correct. Morgan and Devon briefly bowed their heads as well.  
  
"I may have to drop a few hints along with some red herrings. Anything that will keep you from uncovering any harmful information on your own," Solace continued. "However, it may be necessary to tell Julia that Danziger was injured."  
  
"But why?" Devon blurted out in trepidation.  
  
Julia spoke directly to the leader and disclosed, "There's been some permanent tissue damage to John's heart and several of his organs have been under a tremendous strain these past few days. Even if things are returned to the way they used to be, there's a possibility that he will never be completely healthy again. Alonzo will watch him closely and, if it turns out that Danziger needs medical attention, I'll be filled in on a need-to- know basis."  
  
Morgan uttered, "What about Bess?"  
  
"Nothing is for certain. But if we're able to pull this off successfully, I believe that she'll make a full recovery. Hopefully, she'll never have any idea how sick she was," Julia informed him.  
  
Walman turned to Alonzo. "What if you accidentally give too much away?"  
  
"I promise that I'll do whatever it takes to keep this a secret," he declared with fortitude in his tone. "I won't let you down."  
  
"Well, um," Baines apprehensively asked. "Should we take a vote?"  
  
"Do we really need to?" Denner sadly reflected as she leaned in and kissed Cameron's cheek.  
  
He looked back at her with an equally somber expression. "Bess and John have done so much for us. We owe it to them."  
  
Magus turned her head away from the gathering. She didn't want them to witness her tears as she came to grips with the knowledge that she was about to be deprived of the man that she loved.  
  
Walman curled his arms around her waist and whispered into her ear, "You know we have to do this."  
  
Magus started to quietly weep as she turned and embraced him.  
  
"Don't worry, Linda," Walman assured as he squeezed her tightly. "You and me- we got fate on our side. It's just gonna take a little longer, that's all."  
  
Magus swallowed her cries before pulling back to meet his gaze. "It could be fun falling in love with you all over again."  
  
The crewman winked and gave her a devilish smile. "It could be a whole lot of fun."  
  
Amidst the sounds of sniffling and soft sobs, Devon asked, "So it's decided then?"  
  
Every member of Eden Project reluctantly nodded their agreement to proceed forward with the plan. After they dispersed, the crew slowly trudged their way back to their quarters and began to systematically nullify all the events, good and bad, that had taken place since they'd entered the valley. It was going to be a long day.  
  
__________ 


	18. 18/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 18  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
Julia and Alonzo hurriedly worked throughout the afternoon packing up nonessential items and erasing over a weeks worth of their personal diaries. Even Alonzo's journal was deleted in the event that anyone searched his belongings without his consent at a later date. They also erased the medical logs of the entire Eden Advance crew for the past eight days. This turned out to be quite an undertaking considering the large of amount of medical data that had been gathered during and after the Terrian's experiment. Finally, Alonzo collected the chronometers and gear- sets from each colonist and placed them in a lockbox to which only he had the combination.  
  
Their tasks were finally completed just as the sun disappeared into the horizon. The two wearily staggered into the meal tent and grabbed themselves a quick bite to eat. When they were finished, Julia and Alonzo prepared two food trays and set off for a visit with their ailing friends.  
  
They were pleased to find Danziger awake and looking remarkably well, especially considering that he'd been legally dead just twelve hours before. He was sitting on the end of his cot with his arm around Bess who, unfortunately, sported swollen eyes which relayed that she'd recently been crying. John smiled and thanked them for the dinner as Julia scanned their vital statistics. The physician observed that, as John ate his meal, he watched Bess out of the corner of his eye to ensure that she was truly eating instead of just moving the food around on her plate. It amazed and saddened Julia at how protective both Bess and John were of each other. Their total devotion to one another seemed to be the only thing keeping them alive. For now.  
  
Julia's melancholy expression didn't escape Danziger's notice and he worriedly asked, "They haven't changed their minds, have they?"  
  
The doctor shook her head as she pulled up a crate next to Alonzo who was already seated near the pair. "Everything's on schedule."  
  
"Thank God," John uttered as he set their empty plates to the side.  
  
Bess frowned as the words left the mechanic's mouth. It was clear that, although she'd initially agreed to the Terrian's resolution to their plight, she was having second thoughts. She turned toward Danziger and placed her hand on his thigh to get his undivided attention.  
  
"John, I don't want to go through with it," she tried to persuade as she began to smooth out the wrinkled fabric of his pants.  
  
Danziger captured her hand and directed her eyes toward him. "It's the only way, Bess," he replied while caressing the backs of her fingers with his thumb.  
  
"But it's not," she exclaimed in her most influential tone. "Let's stay here and start over. We did it before and we can do it, again. If the others want to go to New Pacifica, let them. But this is our home. This is where we belong."  
  
"No," he said flatly.  
  
Bess eased her hand from his grasp and kneeled on the floor in front of him. She leaned forward until their faces were only inches apart.  
  
"Give it a chance, Honey," she urged as she brought her hands up to cradle his head. "We have all that we need here- food, water, timber- and we have each other. And True will be with us, too. We can live in the cave until the cabin is finished- "  
  
"No, Bess, no," John interrupted, his voice elevating in desperation. "We can't do any of that because we won't live that long."  
  
"Yes, we will," the Earth-res countered as she stroked his hair. "Look, I know that you're sick and I may not be in the best of health myself. But we'll take care of each other like we always have." She smiled and added in sincerity, "We're a team."  
  
John arched back from Bess and looked at Julia and Alonzo in futility. It was obvious that Bess wouldn't be swayed unless she was made aware of some harsh truths. Danziger closed his eyes for a moment and swallowed the lump forming in his throat.  
  
"I need you to listen to me," he said in almost a whisper. "Julia and Alonzo will b-back me up on this, too." He shivered slightly as he reached up to touch her cheek with his fingertips. "We can't stay here." John paused and took a deep breath. "I'm dying."  
  
The Earth-res jerked her head back sharply. "Don't say that," she vehemently told him with wide eyes. "I know that neither of us are the same since we came back-"  
  
"I'm not gonna make it, Bess," John confessed in a heart-rending tone as he moved his other hand to the base of her neck. "I'm withering away piece by piece. I want to stay here so I can be strong for you, but I-I've got nothing left. It takes almost all of my energy just to keep breathing."  
  
His voice was barely audible as he tilted forward until their foreheads touched. "I'm just so tired," he whispered. "I c-can't do it anymore."  
  
"Please," Bess softly pleaded. "I can't lose you, too."  
  
Danziger sat himself straight up on his bunk and attempted to harden his features. "And I won't lose you," he proclaimed in a gravelly voice. "Don't you understand? You're in danger, too. We have to stop this before it's too late for both of us."  
  
"John's right, Bess. He'll die if we don't do this," Julia reinforced. "And you'll probably die, too."  
  
"And we can't let that happen," Alonzo added, choking on his emotions. "You're both part of our family."  
  
Danziger gingerly took both of Bess' hands and pulled her toward him. "All I've ever wanted for you is that you live a long and happy life. That's not possible if things stay the way they are now," he professed. "I'm b-begging you, Bess. Please."  
  
Bess studied Danziger's tormented face for many moments as he wordlessly sought to express his concern and sorrow. She no longer felt that she could depend upon her own damaged mind to make the correct decision. However, she knew in her heart that she could always trust John and understood that what he was telling her must be the truth. Although it didn't upset Bess to hear about her own impending death, she knew that she wouldn't be able to bear it if John died. She was comforted by the knowledge that, if she agreed to the Terrian's solution, his survival would be assured.  
  
But the cherished memories of loving him would not be spared, she woefully thought to herself. Her family- her life as she knew it- would be taken away as if it had never existed in the first place. It wasn't fair.  
  
"All right," Bess sadly conceded as she clasped her arms around the mechanic and hugged him tightly.  
  
John hoisted her upward and sat her next to him on the bed. "You're doing the right thing, Babe," he murmured into her ear as he wrapped his arms around her.  
  
Julia and Alonzo could only watch in silence as Bess lightly sobbed against the crook of Danziger's shoulder for several minutes.  
  
"So it'll be like Adam never existed?" Bess finally asked as her tears began to subside.  
  
"Maybe in our minds," John softly responded as he raised her chin to meet his gaze. "But I bet the memory of him will still be there somewhere deep in our hearts."  
  
The Earth-res cracked a small smile at the possibility. "I hope so," she reflected as she began to twirl her fingers through John's tangled locks. "But I don't want to forget you either."  
  
"You won't forget me," he said, grinning warmly. "You and I were always friends, Bess. That's something that'll never change."  
  
"But I'll be married to Morgan."  
  
John rolled his eyes and let out a light chuckle, "And I guess that means that I'll be going back to pining away for Devon Adair."  
  
They both shook their heads before the mechanic tenderly brushed his lips across hers.  
  
"I still think we'll end up together," Bess declared after they parted. As she bent in kiss him once more, she added with absolute certainty, "We'll find each other, again. I know we will."  
  
Danziger stopped just before their lips met and acknowledged with renewed confidence, "At this point, Darlin', anything's possible."  
  
What was intended by John to be a brief kiss, quickly evolved into something more powerful as Bess grabbed the back of his neck and parted his mouth with her own. He responded by deepening the embrace and closing the remaining gap between them. The sensation of Bess' body pressing against his further fueled Danziger's desire and his hands began to eagerly roam over her clothes. The couple became so consumed with their mounting passions for one another that they failed to remember something rather important. They weren't alone.  
  
"Um, ahem," Julia awkwardly cleared her throat as she closely scrutinized the ground around her feet.  
  
John's head and hands flew back like a shot while Bess made only a halfhearted attempt to retreat from their fervid embrace. She laughed at the embarrassment displayed on Danziger's face as he sheepishly muttered an apology to the pair.  
  
"No need to explain," the pilot noted as he joined in with his own snickers. "We can take a hint," he added, vacating his seat.  
  
Julia also stood and reset the crate against the canvas wall. "I'll come by in a few hours to check on you," Julia offered as she collected her medical bag and joined Alonzo at the tent's threshold.  
  
"No," John expressed, causing the two to halt in their tracks. "We'd like to spend the rest of the evening by ourselves."  
  
Julia cautioned, "I don't know if that's such a good idea. You both are in -"  
  
Bess and Danziger's gazes were locked on each other as he softly implored, "Please. Just let me spend one more n-night alone with my wife."  
  
When Danziger didn't receive an answer, he broke his stare with the Earth-res and turned toward the couple. He could see by their expressions how apprehensive they were about the idea.  
  
"We'll call you if we need you, okay?" John assured, motioning to his nearby gear-set. "You can trust us."  
  
Julia glanced skeptically at Alonzo who shrugged in response.  
  
Danziger tried his best to ease their worries and lighten the mood. "Look, if it'll make you feel any better, I promise not to die," he pledged with the hint of a smirk.  
  
"Me, too," Bess piped in with a smile while making a crossing gesture over her heart.  
  
Alonzo snorted in amusement before concluding that arguing with them would do no good. He looked to Julia and signaled his concordance with their request.  
  
"We'll be by early in the morning to pack you up," Julia acquiesced after reaching the same determination.  
  
"Thank you, Julia. For everything," Bess said gratefully as she took John's hand. "We don't know what we would've done without you and Alonzo."  
  
"Yeah," Danziger added in earnest. "Even all those years ago, you and 'Lonz were always good friends to us."  
  
Bess nodded in agreement as Julia and Alonzo tried not to show their discouragement at hearing the mechanic's deluded statement.  
  
"We'll check in with you tomorrow," Solace informed them as the two exited the tent and resealed the flap.  
  
  
  
Bess turned toward John and grinned, knowing full well how he'd planned to spend the rest of the evening. "So, I guess it'll be like the old days, huh?" she said, gesturing to the small, cramped space of the single cot.  
  
"Guess so," Danziger answered as he turned down the light of the lantern next to the bed. He made certain that a soft glow remained to illuminate the room, remembering how frightened Bess had recently become of the dark. "Is that gonna be a problem?"  
  
"Nope," she replied sweetly as she glided closer to him. "I suppose we'll manage."  
  
"We always did," John noted as they simultaneously edged forward to share a gentle kiss.  
  
Bess returned for more, but Danziger withdrew from her embrace, leaving her slightly perplexed. Before she could question him about his sudden retreat, John reached under the bunk and pulled out the box containing his personal possessions.  
  
He rummaged through the few items of clothing that he owned until he came upon his maroon Ops vest. Bess watched intrigued as John ran his hand along the interior of the garment until he felt a small tear in the fabric. He pried the slit apart with his thumb and forefinger and dug deeply into the padded lining in the search for something that, in Danziger's mind, had originally been hidden there over forty years before. Both seemed equally surprised when John produced a small cloth pouch that Bess instantly recognized.  
  
"Wear this for me," he softly requested as he slipped the wedding ring on Bess' finger. "Just for this one night."  
  
As Bess marveled at the simple, yet profoundly meaningful, piece of jewelry, the finality of their situation hit her head-on. "John-" she began to cry as she was overcome with emotion.  
  
Danziger pulled her close and met her saddened gaze with his own. "I know, Sweetheart," he said, wiping away Bess' tears with the backs of his fingers. He leaned in and lightly kissed her forehead.  
  
"No more yesterdays or tomorrows, okay?" he whispered against her hair. "Right now, let's just live in the moment."  
  
John's eyes remained open as he slowly lowered his head and grazed his lips against hers. They parted only for a moment before joining again in a gentle, lingering caress. More kisses followed; each one growing longer and more passionate than the one before as they gradually allowed themselves to be pulled deeper and deeper into the clutches of desire.  
  
Danziger lowered Bess to the bed and took charge of her; meticulously exploring the curves and planes of her frame. He left almost no part of her untouched by his hands or mouth as she writhed in pleasure beneath him. When he finally relinquished control, Bess answered him with equal fire. Because of their many years together, she knew exactly where to touch him to heighten his arousal and easily brought him to the same plateau that he had taken her to several minutes before.  
  
Their hunger for one another intensified with each passing moment. John pulled Bess back up to his eye-level and kissed her vigorously, embedding his fingers deeply into her curly locks.  
  
Grasping her to him tightly, Danziger rolled over on top of her. Both let out a breathless moan as they molded together into one.  
  
After a few seconds of shared passion, Danziger stopped abruptly and veered his head backward in awe. "It feels the same, doesn't it?" he expressed in astonishment.  
  
Bess knew precisely what he was talking about. It didn't matter that they had never made love in the reality that they now existed in. It was a dance that the pair had engaged in numerous times in their minds and in their hearts. Although their time together on the Dreamplane had been nothing but an illusion, their love and commitment to each other was authentic and undeniable. Their souls were forever connected and that was more than enough for the both of them. For now, it would have to be.  
  
"It feels exactly the same," Bess agreed as she eased John back to her and they ardently continued what they'd started.  
  
They gave themselves to each other completely; the movement of their bodies conveying the passion and pure devotion that they felt for one another. Despite their fragile conditions, Bess and John made love several times during the night. They savored each moment spent together, both knowing that time was a luxury that neither possessed.  
  
With the dawn only a few hours away, Bess settled in John's sheltering embrace. As she toyed with the hairs on his chest, Danziger propped himself up on one elbow to get a better look at his wife's beautiful face.  
  
Bess sighed as he delicately ran his thumb over her bottom lip. "This is the way it should be, John," she sleepily announced as she cuddled against him. "You and me lying in each other's arms like we are now."  
  
"I couldn't agree more, Sweetheart," Danziger told her truthfully as he attentively stroked up and down the arch of her spine. He leaned down to brush his lips across both of Bess' now-shut eyelids. "Sleep well."  
  
As her breathing steadied and she fell into a deep slumber, John memorized every inch of the radiant woman who had been ripped from his life almost three decades before. He had no idea if what he'd just experienced had actually occurred or was nothing more than wishful images conjured in his mind's eye. However, either way, he was certain that he'd been presented with a priceless gift.  
  
For so many years, John had dreamed of being given one more chance to see his beloved wife. To be able to let Bess know how much she had meant to him. To tell her and show her once more how much he had loved her... how much he still loved her. Despite the terrible mistakes that the Terrians had made, Danziger couldn't help but be grateful to the creatures for seemingly granting him his final wish.  
  
But maybe this is real, John pondered to himself. Perhaps this really is Bess sleeping in my arms right now and the Terrians have figured out a resolution to this horrible mess after all. Hell, he thought as he closed his eyes, I might even live long enough to see the outcome.  
  
__________  
  
The morning mist blanketing the trees and mountains slowly dissipated into the warm summer air as the Eden crew made their final preparations for departure. It was an odd sensation for many of the colonists, considering some of them had lived in the valley for several months (at least, in their minds).  
  
Julia and Alonzo entered Bess and John's quarters and were surprised to find them already dressed with their belongings packed and ready to go. As the doctor checked their status, both patients remained quiet and subdued. Solace noticed that, for the first time in days, Bess was wearing Morgan's silver wedding band. She also wore a look that could best be described as shell-shocked. Danziger's face was nearly expressionless as Julia administered the final scheduled injection of beta-blockers to elevate his ever-declining heart rate.  
  
Both Bess and John became extremely uncomfortable when Baines and Mazatl appeared to collect their personal effects and dismantle their tent. Seeing the other Edenites still had a tumultuous impact on the couple. Moreover, they felt a tremendous sense of guilt because of the sacrifices that the entire group was being forced to make on their behalf. Therefore, Bess and John insisted that it would be best if they left camp until the Terrian's scheduled arrival later in the morning.  
  
As Julia and Alonzo noiselessly escorted the pair down the winding path toward the alcove, Bess noticed that Danziger was walking rather sluggishly and seemed to be dragging his feet. However, it was only when they approached the river and the sun's rays shone fully on the couple that Bess was given a clear view as to how haggard John's appearance truly was. The Earth-res took hold of his pale hand and felt how cold his skin was to the touch. She ignored Danziger's feeble assurances that he was fine and enlisted Alonzo's aid in helping John travel the final few yards to the water's edge. They seated him on the soft earth with his back leaning up against the fallen log and Julia immediately injected another dose of cardiac boosters into his system. As his heartbeat mildly increased its rhythm, Danziger smiled weakly and welcomed Bess into his arms.  
  
"Don't you go anywhere, John," Bess told him in a hushed voice as she curled up in his embrace.  
  
The mechanic could only muster a grunt of acknowledgment as he rested his chin on the top of her head.  
  
Julia and Alonzo waited nearby as Bess and Danziger enjoyed their final sunrise together as husband and wife. John stayed silent as Bess whispered words of comfort and affection to him. She spoke of their years on the Dreamscape, first as friends, later as lovers, but always as essential presences in each other's lives. She remembered how they'd cared for and supported one another after the others had died. She recalled them finding the hope within themselves to start over again.  
  
Bess reminisced about the many fixtures of their cabin, John's God- awful cooking and the countless hours spent talking by the fireplace as they got to know each other better. She reminded him of their hesitant first kiss, their enthusiastic second kiss and her joy at finding the man whom she considered to be her counterpart in every way. She choked back tears as she remembered all of the happy years they'd spent creating a new life together as a family with Adam and their unborn baby, Eben.  
  
Bess pulled back to meet Danziger's crestfallen expression and said loudly enough for only his ears, "I understand that our memories will be taken from us, but I'm hoping that, deep down, our subconscious will retain some of our feelings or-" she struggled for the right words, "I don't know what to call it- our need for one another. It may take years for us to realize that we're a perfect fit. Maybe it'll only take a few days. But even though our time together was an illusion, it's still a dream worth fighting for."  
  
She stroked John's day-old beard with her fingertips as she encouraged, "And I expect you to fight for this dream, too."  
  
John nodded as Bess pulled his head downward and lovingly kissed him.  
  
"I think that we should start heading back," Alonzo called to the pair as he and Julia joined them at the bank.  
  
Julia skeptically observed Danziger's devitalized state as he strained to get up. "Are you able to walk, John?" she questioned in a doubtful tone.  
  
"Yeah," the mechanic answered faintly as Bess and Alonzo lifted him to the standing position by his elbows.  
  
"John, Honey, are you sure?" Bess asked worriedly while she helped to steady him.  
  
Danziger ignored the queasy sensation of his gut doing cartwheels and regained his equilibrium. "Yeah, I can make it," he affirmed, sounding as though he was trying to convince himself as much as he was trying to reassure the others.  
  
After taking a last, heartbreaking glance at the place where they'd spent so much time together, Bess and John turned away from the river and began slowly tottering up the trail. Although he had to stop several times when his legs started to wobble, Danziger stubbornly insisted on continuing without assistance and they eventually made it back to camp. Once there, they found the remaining Advancers congregated around the fully loaded vehicles solemnly waiting for the dreaded, but necessary, moment to arrive.  
  
As soon as the four entered the clearing, an ear-splitting rumbling noise filled the air as scores of Terrians sprouted up from the earth and surrounded the colonists from all sides. Solace and the others squinted into the sunlight to view the varied insignias worn by the many different tribes who had chosen to take part in the historic encounter.  
  
Upon seeing the creatures, Bess could feel herself beginning to lose control and was quickly overwhelmed by panic, confusion and a multitude of other emotions. John caught her by the shoulders as she fearfully stumbled backward into his chest.  
  
"No," she whimpered as tears of grief formed in her eyes.  
  
John gingerly rotated her to face him and squatted down to her meet her gaze. "It's gonna be okay," he told her sincerely before leaning in and gently kissing her cheek. "I love you, Bess," he whispered into her ear, his voice full of affection.  
  
Danziger couldn't resist brushing his lips across her face one more time before tearing himself away. After straightening to his full height, he more loudly directed, "N-Now, go stand over there with Morgan, all right?"  
  
Bess didn't move and stared at the mechanic with an anguished expression. She tentatively stretched out her hand toward him, but John quickly backed away from her reach, afraid that if Bess touched him, he wouldn't be able to let her go.  
  
"Go on," Danziger prompted in a hoarse tone.  
  
Julia stepped forward and guided the despondent Earth-res toward Morgan who was positioned next to the Transrover at the front of the convoy.  
  
Now that Bess was properly situated, Alonzo prepared to make his way to the head of the caravan when John firmly gripped him by the shoulder.  
  
"I need for you to pr-promise me that you'll take care of her," he demanded of the pilot. "Promise me that, no matter what happens, Bess will be safe."  
  
Solace placed his hand over John's and pledged, "I promise to keep you both safe."  
  
Danziger gave him a small nod of satisfaction before releasing his hold and setting off to rejoin his daughter who was waiting by the ATV several yards away. John felt that his very life-force was being siphoned from him with every step that he took. By the time he'd managed to stagger over to True, he was lightheaded and heavily winded as he breathlessly grabbed onto the vehicle's sidebar to hold himself upright.  
  
"Dad, do you want me to get Julia?" True asked, horrified by his condition.  
  
"No, True-girl. It's almost over," he wheezed in a voice that resembled relief. The edges of John's mouth arched into a smile as he turned to take a final glimpse of his little girl.  
  
"Everything's gonna be fine," Danziger calmly reassured just before his eyes rolled to the back of his head and his legs buckled beneath him.  
  
"DADDY!" True shrieked as her father crumbled to the ground in front of her.  
  
"John!" Bess and Devon cried in unison.  
  
Bess lurched in the direction of the mechanic, but was hindered by Morgan seizing her hand and swinging her back toward him.  
  
"Oh, God, no! John!" the Earth-res wailed as she fought ferociously to wrangle herself from Morgan's grasp.  
  
Julia had just joined Alonzo's side in front of the 'Rover when she'd heard True's frightened screams. Even without seeing Danziger, she immediately realized that he had likely gone into shock, if not full cardiac arrest. She threw her med-kit to the ground and ripped it open, spilling several items in the process as she madly searched for the correct medication.  
  
"Do something!" Devon pleaded to the doctor while she, Uly and Yale rushed toward Danziger's still form.  
  
Alonzo knew that there was no time to waste. "NOW!" he frantically yelled to the encircling Terrians. "DO IT NOW!!!"  
  
Without hesitation or fanfare, the Terrians crossed their staffs and bolts of lightning exploded from every direction. The members of Eden Advance were engulfed by the intensity of the blinding beams of light as it overtook their senses. While his friends collapsed into unconsciousness around him, Alonzo quickly closed his eyes and willed himself to the Dreamplane. He remained there for many long minutes as he nervously waited for the creatures to perform their magic.  
  
Finally, a lone Terrian appeared before him in the alternate dimension.  
  
The task has been completed. It is now safe to awaken and recommence your journey to New Pacifica.  
  
"Did it work?" Solace anxiously questioned. "And what about my friend? Is he okay?"  
  
The being tilted his head to the side and trilled, Everything has been returned to the way that it should be.  
  
"Yeah," Solace muttered cynically. "That's what you said the last time."  
  
__________ 


	19. 19/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 19  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
"My aching head," groaned Walman as he slowly flopped over onto his back.  
  
"You okay, Greg?" Magus asked, fighting her own discomfort while she crawled to the crewman.  
  
"Oh, I'm just peachy and you?" came the sarcastic reply as she roughly tugged him up to the sitting position next to her.  
  
Magus placed the cool palms of her hands against her throbbing temples. "Got one helluva headache, that's for sure."  
  
"Is everyone all right?" Julia muttered groggily, still laying on the ground at the front of the caravan.  
  
"I'll be a lot better as soon as I figure out how the hell I got here," mumbled Baines who was sprawled out and face-down in the nearby grass.  
  
Cameron helped Denner to her feet. They turned and stared at the vehicles in puzzlement as she meekly noted, "Um, I don't remember packing up, do you?"  
  
"Last thing I remember was falling asleep in my tent," he replied.  
  
"Same, here," Mazatl added as he fumbled for his sunglasses to shield his burning eyes from the sun.  
  
Julia's eyes were also stinging. Not only that, she felt like her head had been tossed into the center of a Grendler stampede. With great difficulty, the doctor attempted to regain her bearings and began to scan the campsite in bewilderment, having no clue as to how she and the others had ended up where they were now. Somehow, it appeared that every member of Eden Project had been rendered unconscious for an indeterminate amount of time. That is, except for Alonzo. In contrast with the other Edenites, the pilot was wide awake and pain-free. He stoically stood next to her with an indescribable look etched on his face, intently staring in the direction of one of the vehicles.  
  
Julia shoved the confusion of their current circumstances to the back of her mind and pulled herself together. Right now, she had to concentrate her efforts on checking her friends to ensure that they weren't injured. The physician reached for her medical kit and was surprised to find it suspiciously wide open with many of its contents scattered about on the neighboring ground. She hastily tossed the misplaced substances back into her bag and grabbed her Diaglove before rising to her feet. However, just as she set off toward the colonists, Alonzo clenched her by the upper arm to stop her.  
  
"Don't," he advised simply, but with a serious expression.  
  
"I have to see if anyone's hurt," Julia began. "We don't know-"  
  
"They're fine," Solace interrupted purposefully. "But, for now, I need you to give me your Diaglove and your med-bag."  
  
"What?" she exclaimed in disbelief.  
  
"Don't worry, you'll get them back later."  
  
The doctor gaped at him in uncertainty and didn't immediately comply with his request, causing Alonzo to sternly insist, "There's no time to argue about this, Julia. Please just do it."  
  
Julia looked into her lover's cocoa eyes and viewed the honesty reflected in them. She also saw a bit of fear. It was the latter emotion that motivated her to reluctantly relinquish the items to him. After thanking her, Alonzo promptly walked to the Dunerail and placed the medical equipment underneath the driver's seat.  
  
After the chore was concluded, Solace headed directly to the center of the dispersed group. "I need all of your attention," he announced.  
  
When several of the Edenites were slow to halt their conversations, Alonzo brought his thumb and finger to his lips and let out a high-pitched whistle to get their attention. It did.  
  
"Listen to me, all of you," he commanded over the colonist's negative response to the shrill assault on their ears. "We have to get out of here right now."  
  
Unfortunately for everyone, Devon didn't wake up in a very good mood. "What's going on?" she irately challenged.  
  
"What's going on is we need to leave this valley immediately," Alonzo answered in a no-nonsense tone.  
  
"Hold on," Walman posed. "I thought that the Terrians told us to wait here for further instructions."  
  
"Big change of plans. We're leaving now," the pilot revealed.  
  
After surveying the uneasy looks exchanged by the group, he added, "Look, I'll fill you in on everything once we get a safe distance from this place, okay?"  
  
Before the Edenites had time to answer or react to his instructions, a bloodcurdling shriek pierced the air.  
  
"Nnnoooooo! Oh, Bess!"  
  
Most of the Edenites ran toward Morgan's horror-filled cries as he turned to them and blurted out in panic, "My gear! Somebody stole my gear!"  
  
"Morgan, Honey, I'm sure that it's around here somewhere," Bess patiently reassured while picking through several of the suitcases strapped to the side of the 'Rover. "It's probably packed with the rest of your things."  
  
The liaison looked at Bess as if she was demented. "No, Bess. My gear has my VR attachment on it." He violently shook his head as he stressed in an emphatic tone, "I would never let that out of my sight! Never!"  
  
"I've got your gear, Morgan," Alonzo called to him from the back of the crowd. "I have all of your gear-sets and chronometers. You'll get them back tonight after we set up camp."  
  
Morgan nervously tucked his loose hairs back into his ponytail and marched toward Solace. "I want," Morgan reconsidered his words and started again. "No, I demand that you unhand my VR set this instant."  
  
The pilot gave him a look of disgust and walked away. With so much hanging in the balance, this was the last thing he needed to deal with right now.  
  
"Hey!" the bureaucrat called after Alonzo, stamping his feet into the ground. "You can't do this!"  
  
"Morgan, Sweetie-" Bess began to console.  
  
"Don't 'Morgan, Sweetie' me," he fearfully exclaimed with wide eyes as he turned toward his wife. "Bess, you know I won't last the day without a hit of Virtual. VR is the only thing that keeps me sane on this godforsaken planet!"  
  
The bureaucrat took several steps toward a retreating Alonzo, angrily yelling, "And what gives you the right to confiscate our stuff, anyway?" He raised his voice even further and accused, "And who gave you permission to go rifling through my personal belongings?"  
  
Solace stopped and rotated back toward the liaison. "You did," he said plainly before turning and continuing toward the Dunerail.  
  
"I did not!" Morgan huffily opposed.  
  
"Put a sock in it, Morgan," Danziger bellowed from the ATV where he was still seated, sloped against the front tire. "My head hurts enough without your ridiculous whining."  
  
John stood up and stumbled a step or two before he was finally able to reclaim his balance. He tried to cast aside how out of kilter he was feeling and instead turned his attention to his daughter.  
  
"You okay, True-girl?"  
  
"My eyes kinda hurt," she timidly answered as the mechanic gently pulled her to the standing position and began to dust the dirt off her clothing.  
  
Danziger eased True's sunglasses out of her front pocket and slid them onto her face. "Yeah, me, too," he noted as he swerved his gaze to the small group behind him.  
  
"Hey, you guys all right?" he called over to Devon, Uly and Yale who were congregated a few yards away.  
  
"We're fine, Danziger," Devon absently replied as she concentrated her efforts on doting over Uly to be sure that he hadn't been injured.  
  
Yale asked Alonzo, "Are we in any danger at the moment?"  
  
"Not as long as we hightail it outta here," he explained with authority to the entire crew. "I know that you're disoriented and some of you may be feeling tired. Those of you who need to rest should ride in the vehicles."  
  
As the crowd started to disband, Alonzo took Julia by the hand and led her to the Dunerail, declaring, "I want you to ride with me today. Climb in."  
  
It was obvious to Julia that Alonzo intended to keep a watchful eye on her to be certain that she didn't attempt to perform any of her duties as the crew's doctor. Although, deep down, she knew that there must be a rational motive for Alonzo's strong-arm tactics, it didn't mean that she had to be happy about it. She gave him a not-so-subtle leer as she settled into the passenger's seat.  
  
To make matters worse, Morgan was clearly not done with his tirade and appealed to the group in irritation, "Don't you think we should get some kind of explanation before we set out?"  
  
"We don't have time for this, Morgan," Alonzo warned, his self-control beginning to wane as he climbed behind the wheel of the 'Rail. "I'll tell you all that you need to know this evening."  
  
"Uh-uh. No way. I want some answers right now," Morgan snapped, animatedly pointing down at the ground. "And I'm not moving from this spot until you do it."  
  
"Oh, yeah? Think, again," Danziger intervened, briskly moving toward the Transrover and looming over the smaller man.  
  
With a fierce stare, John took a menacing stride forward and pinned Morgan against the vehicle. The mechanic lifted his arm and, for a split second, Morgan thought that Danziger was going to slug him. However, John reached over the liaison's head to yank open the driver's side door.  
  
"Get in," he instructed in a low growl which held a promise of future pain if his demands weren't met quickly. "Get your ass in that vehicle- right- now."  
  
With all other means of escape blocked off by Danziger's hulking frame, Morgan had nowhere to go but up. He had barely managed to scurry into the cab of the 'Rover before John harshly slammed the door shut.  
  
"Neanderthal," Morgan hollered, fully knowing that the mechanic couldn't hear him through the thick panes of glass.  
  
"Spineless weasel," Danziger grumbled to himself as he ambled backward several paces.  
  
Because he wasn't paying attention to where he was going, John turned and accidentally barreled directly into Bess. He grabbed her by the sides of her shoulders to prevent her from falling to the ground.  
  
"Jeez, I'm sorry, Bess," John apologized, the prior antagonism in his voice and posturing completely dissolved.  
  
He let her go once she'd steadied herself and she looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "For what, almost running me over or for threatening my husband?" she asked, her tone remaining congenial, though her words could have been considered admonishing.  
  
He gave her a crooked grin and shrugged. "Which do you think?" he said with a small snort before continuing on his way to rejoin True.  
  
Bess found that she couldn't help but crack a small smile of her own as she watched him walk away. Although she didn't necessarily approve of Danziger's methods, she knew that his heart was in the right place. She understood that John was just trying to follow Alonzo's lead to get the convoy moving and keep them safe from whatever unknown danger inhabited the mountain range they were currently in.  
  
Besides, Bess was secretly glad that Morgan would be driving the Transrover. She was feeling a bit sleepy and riding shotgun in the vehicle would give her a much-welcomed chance to nap. As she planted herself in the passenger seat and gazed out the window, she was slightly rattled when a peculiar sense of sadness came over her. She suddenly felt that, by exiting the valley, she was leaving behind something very precious to her. Having no memory of packing up her possessions, she wondered what she could have possibly lost or forgotten that could be so important.  
  
Well, whatever it is, I'll just have to learn to live without it, Bess inwardly rationalized. She sighed and leaned back in her seat. She hoped that Alonzo would be able to shed some light on why she was feeling so emotionally out of sorts this morning. Maybe he could also explain why Bess had the strangest sensation that she'd been crying.  
  
  
  
Danziger briefly spoke with his daughter before she gleefully scampered off to pester Uly who was planning on walking with Yale. Confident that True was safe and sound, at least for the next few hours, John proceeded toward the Dunerail.  
  
"Mind if I hitch a ride with you two?"  
  
"Hop in," Alonzo nodded, trying not to show how concerned he was about the mechanic.  
  
As John crammed his large body into the already cramped back seat of the vehicle, Julia couldn't help but notice that he looked a bit run-down.  
  
"Are you okay?" she was compelled to ask, despite the prospect of being reprimanded by Alonzo. She briefly glanced at the pilot, expecting him to be upset, but was surprised to find that he looked as interested in hearing Danziger's answer as she was.  
  
"Just tired, that's all. I feel like I packed up the entire camp by myself," John reluctantly admitted. He chose not to mention anything else.  
  
"For all we know, you did," the physician said dryly, eyeing the Diaglove tucked under Solace's legs. "And some of the others are also complaining of fatigue. Especially Walman, Magus, Cameron and Denner."  
  
Alonzo smirked, understanding the real reason as to why the aforementioned colonists were suffering from a lack of sleep. If they only knew, he thought to himself.  
  
"They'll be fine," the pilot reiterated. "Trust me."  
  
Julia gave him a stiff smile. "Well, I guess I don't have much of a choice, do I?" she answered, folding her arms in front of her and swiveling her gaze to the road ahead.  
  
"Nope. I guess not," Solace responded.  
  
Danziger shook his head. As under the weather as he currently felt, at that moment he'd much rather be in his own shoes than in Alonzo's.  
  
"I hope you know what you're doing, Pal," he commented, sympathetically patting Solace on the back.  
  
As the vehicles' engines were started and the caravan recommenced its pilgrimage to New Pacifica, John balled up his blue jacket under his head and nodded off to sleep.  
  
__________  
  
They drove throughout the day with as few breaks as possible to allow the vehicles to recharge. Alonzo continued to monitor Julia to ensure that she didn't try to administer any medical care to any of the colonists, especially Danziger. Although Devon and Morgan attempted to needle Alonzo for more information as to the unusual goings-on, for the most part, the remaining members of Eden Project seemed to fall back into their daily routine as the pain in their heads and eyes gradually faded away. As for John, he slept the entire day with the exception of when he was awakened for lunch, which he hardly touched. Bess also dozed most of the afternoon in the Transrover.  
  
After traveling nearly twenty-four clicks, Solace finally felt that the group had distanced themselves enough from their home of the prior week and a half. Luckily, the scenery had shifted from a lush, vegetation- filled valley to flat, dry plains, giving him additional assurance that no one's memory would be rekindled by familiar surroundings. As the sun lazily settled into the distance, Alonzo suggested to Devon that they halt the convoy and set up camp for the night.  
  
Tents went up and belongings were unpacked a bit more slowly than they normally would be. Not only did several of the crew remain tired, presumably from the long day's trek, tension and uncertainty permeated their minds. Although they were unsure about the specifics, all of them knew that something wasn't right and were eager to find out the truth.  
  
True and Uly consented to being sent to bed early with the promise that they would be filled in later and that Danziger would also come by to tell each of them an extra scary bedtime story. The rest of the group uneasily gathered around the campfire and waited for Alonzo to emerge from the med-tent to enlighten them regarding that morning's odd occurrence.  
  
Solace finally arrived carrying a metal case which he set at his feet as he took his place next to Julia.  
  
"I think it's about time we were given some answers," Devon remarked impatiently.  
  
"I agree," Alonzo responded with a bit of apprehension.  
  
Okay, here we go, he thought to himself as he began the account that he'd been practicing in his head all day. He had to be extremely careful here. "What happened to us is going to take some explaining and I'm going to need all of you to trust me like you've never trusted me before."  
  
He reached down to the box next to him and punched in a sequence of numbers, causing the container to open with a hiss. He began to distribute its contents, stating, "But first things first. Here are your chronometers and gear-sets."  
  
"How did you get these?" Magus asked, puzzled.  
  
Solace calmly related, "You gave them to me for safekeeping."  
  
"I most certainly did not," Morgan snapped as he grabbed his gear and lovingly inspected it for damage. "Why would I give you my VR?"  
  
"Hey, wait a minute. There's something wrong with my chronometer," Mazatl interrupted.  
  
"Mine, too," Denner relayed while lightly tapping on the face of her timepiece. "The date's wrong."  
  
"No. The date is correct," Alonzo informed them. "Nine days have passed since your last memory."  
  
The crew gasped in amazement and Baines spat out his almost-coffee before Danziger demanded, "What the hell are you talking about, Solace?"  
  
"I know that you only remember spending two nights in the mountain range we left this morning," he recounted. "The truth of the matter is that we ran into some trouble on our third day there and the only way out of it was to erase the memories of what took place. That is, everyone's memory except for mine."  
  
Walman couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Is this your idea of some kind of sick joke?"  
  
Devon zeroed in on only one part of Alonzo's statement. "You mean that we've lost over a week's worth of traveling time?" she fumed.  
  
"What kind of trouble?" Julia pressed, focusing on another part of her lover's revelation.  
  
"Our group was called to that valley for a very important reason," Alonzo divulged. "We were brought there to perform a mission that was vital for us and for the Terrians. Not everyone was chosen to participate- "  
  
His eyes caught Danziger's suddenly alarmed expression and knew exactly what the mechanic was thinking. "Don't worry, John. The children weren't involved," Solace affirmed.  
  
Danziger nodded his thanks for the assurance. He couldn't imagine his life is something bad had happened to True.  
  
The pilot continued, "Anyway, for most of you, your part was over very quickly. Only two of you ended up carrying the assignment through to its completion." He let out an uncomfortable sigh. "And unfortunately, in the process, both of you were badly injured."  
  
There was an eruption of activity as many of the Edenites feverishly began examining themselves for needle marks, the remnants of bullet wounds or any other blemishes that might be classified as battle scars. They found nothing.  
  
"Are you saying that the Terrians knowingly put us in danger?" Yale expressed in trepidation.  
  
"No," Solace answered, shaking his head. "There was a terrible accident; one the Terrians hadn't foreseen happening. They never would have asked us for our assistance if they thought that we could get hurt. Believe me, they've learned a lot about humanity these past few days."  
  
"What did they ask us to do?" Cameron inquired worriedly.  
  
"I'm not going to be able to tell you very much about the mission or anything else that took place," Alonzo said in a cautious tone. "If I reveal too many details, it could trigger your subconscious and bring all of your memories back. That will most likely sign the death warrant for one or both of the people who were injured. It could end up destroying us all."  
  
He paused a moment before continuing, meticulously choosing each word. "One thing I can tell you is that the situation became desperate." He turned to Julia and disclosed, "You tried to heal them, but nothing worked." Alonzo then pivoted his gaze across the flames to Devon who was seated on the opposite side of campfire. "You tried to help, too, but they continued to get worse and worse. It became clear that they were going to die unless radical measures were taken. Our only choice was to let the Terrians cure them and wash the entire experience from our minds."  
  
"So we willingly allowed the Terrians to make us forget all of this?" Walman interjected.  
  
"Yeah, did we vote unanimously to go through with it?" Baines posed with skepticism.  
  
"Believe me, once you all realized how sick both of them were, a vote wasn't needed."  
  
Morgan scoffed, "So you're saying that we didn't vote!"  
  
"Morgan," Bess whispered curtly, nudging him none too gently.  
  
"Trust me, Morgan, you agreed with all of this completely. We didn't have the option of bouncing around alternatives. We were in a race against time. It actually came down to the final seconds whether or not one of them would survive," the pilot revealed.  
  
Well, at least that would explain why my med-bag was open when I regained consciousness, Julia deduced in her mind. She chose to remain quiet and instead concentrated her efforts on listening intently to his explanation.  
  
Solace proceeded onward with his partly factual tale. "All of us worked together to do everything we could to repress the events of the past week and a half. We deleted all of our journals. The medical logs and Zero's memory files were also purged. You gave me your gear-sets so no one recorded any of today's developments. Even Yale suspended the digital recording device in his cybernetic eye and only I have the codes to resume its function."  
  
"Is he right, Yale?" Denner asked.  
  
The tutor touched several buttons located on the small console of his arm. "It appears as though Alonzo is absolutely correct," he confirmed in astonishment.  
  
Not able to contain himself any longer, Morgan sprang to his feet. "Doesn't anyone besides me find this all the least bit suspicious?" he disputed while waving in arms in a series of overstated gestures. Looking to the others for additional support, he sneered, "I don't know about you, but I'm not buying this 'my poor buddies, the Terrians, goofed and they sure are real, real sorry about dragging you off-course to do their dirty work and almost getting you killed' for a second!"  
  
He scornfully turned his attention to Alonzo. "It sounds more like our flyboy, here, got in over his head with his dirt-friends and the only way to save his and their fannies was to make us conveniently forget that they screwed up in the first place!"  
  
The bureaucrat opened his mouth to continue, but Bess firmly grabbed him by the arm and jerked him back to his seat.  
  
"Ow! Bess, what'd I do?" Morgan asked in genuine surprise as he rubbed the spot where her hand had been.  
  
Bess successfully fought the urge to scold him and looked away, refusing to be drawn into yet another public argument. These past few months, Bess had found that her patience was dwindling regarding her husband's disruptive and often embarrassing displays of hysteria.  
  
However, this time Morgan wasn't alone in his opinion.  
  
"Um, Morgan does have a point," Baines fumbled, amazed that he was on the same side as the liaison. "It does seem like the Terrians are trying to cover their tracks."  
  
"That's not what happened," Alonzo clarified, trying his best to explain without giving away any information that could be detrimental to his friends. "If you're looking to assign blame then, yes, it was the Terrian's fault. No one is denying that, including the Terrians. They made a mistake. However, they're also the ones who provided the solution to save two of us."  
  
He furthered, "And you should also know that, because of what we did- especially the two who endangered their lives to finish the task- the Terrians now have a much better understanding of what it means to be human. A new, much stronger bond has been forged between our two species. They're fully convinced that the members of Eden Project are different from the others who came before us. Uly's link to the Terrians is no longer seen by some tribes as a threat. We won't be prevented from traveling or settling in any of their territories. The Terrians finally trust us. They finally accept us."  
  
Although she didn't show it, Devon was glad to hear the good news; most especially that her son would be safe from rival clans of Terrians who disapproved of his genetic link to them. That notwithstanding, she still was not getting the answers she desired. "But what did we do to gain this acceptance?" Adair demanded to know.  
  
"I can't tell you," Solace replied, shifting his weight uncomfortably.  
  
The leader's eyes narrowed. "You can't or your won't?"  
  
"Both," he admitted frankly, directing his attention and words to the entire group. "I told you that every one of you is going to have to trust me, here. You see, it's imperative that we maintain what we've started. That means that those last nine days have to stay buried in your minds. If some of you start digging for the truth, you run the risk of remembering and at least one of you will probably die."  
  
"But if it was as awful as you say it was, how can we be sure that the Terrians won't ever do this to us, again?" Magus questioned in concern.  
  
Alonzo was quick to reassure, "Nothing like this will ever happen again. I give you my word."  
  
"Gee, his 'word'," Morgan jeered, his voice bubbling over with sarcasm. "I feel better already."  
  
Bess wasted no time in smacking his knee with the back of her hand. "Ow!" Morgan cried with a mystified look that showed he had no clue that he'd said anything wrong.  
  
Denner ignored the feuding couple and inquired to the pilot, "I'm sorry to ask this, Alonzo, but how do we know that you're telling us the truth?"  
  
"There's too much at stake for you not to believe me. You don't have a choice."  
  
Now it was Devon's turn to rise to her feet. "That's where we disagree. We do have a choice," she commanded. "And we're entitled to know what happened to us."  
  
"Finally, the voice of reason," Morgan chimed in satisfactorily.  
  
"Devon's right," Cameron agreed. "We deserve an explanation."  
  
Denner asked Alonzo, "Can't you at least tell us who was picked for the job?"  
  
"And who got hurt?" Walman added.  
  
"Yeah, we want details," Baines asserted. "That way we'll know enough to say 'thanks, but no thanks' the next time the Terrians show up and ask us to risk our hides."  
  
"Don't you get it?" Solace insisted, his tone becoming more vehement as he lost his composure. "I can't say any more without putting lives at risk."  
  
Devon's own temper flared as she defiantly informed him, "Then, we'll start an investigation into this on our own. And we'll do it with or without your cooperation."  
  
"No," came a sweet, but very determined voice. "No one's investigating anything. This needs to stop right now."  
  
Everyone swung their shocked stares toward Bess as she folded her hands in her lap and announced resolutely, "I think that we should count our blessings and move on with our lives."  
  
"I'm with Bess," John concurred without hesitation. "Whatever happened to us in that valley should stay there."  
  
"You've got to be kidding," Devon spat, caught completely off-guard by what she considered to be Danziger's latest challenge to what she deemed to be her rightful authority.  
  
John made eye contact with Devon for the first time that evening and, if her looks could have killed, Danziger was certain that he would have ended up as nothing more than an unexplained stain on the crate he was sitting on. But, by this time, he was used to being the object of Devon's ire, so he remained unfazed by her nearly homicidal gaze.  
  
"Not at all," the mechanic confidently said. "Look, we're all healthy now, aren't we? And we obviously felt strongly enough that we deliberately erased all of our personal and professional files and did God knows what else to keep us from uncovering the facts."  
  
Bess jumped in and persuaded, "And Yale, do you really think that you would have deactivated your eye's recording mechanism, much less give Alonzo total authority over how and when to restart it, unless we were in danger?"  
  
"She has a point," Cameron acknowledged.  
  
Bess added, "It would also explain why we were packed up and waiting by the vehicles when we came to."  
  
"I don't know, Bess," Walman relayed in uncertainty. "It still feels like a cover-up to me."  
  
"And some of what Alonzo's saying doesn't make sense," Magus scrutinized.  
  
"Hell, most of it doesn't make sense!" Baines balked.  
  
Devon swerved her glare back to Danziger and remarked in disbelief, "And I can't believe that you, of all people, could so easily write off the last nine days without even asking a single question. Aren't you interested in finding out the truth?"  
  
"Of course I want to know," he shot back. "But I'm not willing to jeopardize the lives of two of my friends just to satisfy my own morbid curiosity."  
  
John rocked back in his seat and rationalized, "Listen, I agree with Magus that some of Alonzo's explanation doesn't make sense. I'm sure that part of it is nothing more than a smokescreen to keep us from discovering anything that could hurt us." He shrugged and absently scratched at his beard. "I don't know, maybe he's tellin' the truth about us performing some dangerous job for the Diggers. Maybe he's not. I don't care."  
  
Danziger lurched forward and rested his elbows on his knees, adamantly proclaiming, "But what I do know is that, whatever 'Lonz is hiding from us, he's doing it for a very good reason. Let's also not forget that, whether we remember it or not, WE were responsible for covering up the details of the past week or so. Isn't that proof enough that we should leave well enough alone?"  
  
"John is absolutely right," Bess declared supportively. Out of nowhere, her Earth accent spilled out as strongly as ever as she added, "We should let sleeping dogs lie."  
  
Bess momentarily averted her embarrassed gaze to the firelight in front of her and mentally reprimanded herself for her slip. She'd already learned the hard way how most people felt about her Earth-miner background. How was the crew going to take her opinion seriously if she kept blatantly reminding them of it?  
  
Danziger looked at her strangely and wondered (and not for the first time) what had become of the spirited drawl that Bess had exhibited those first few weeks after they'd arrived on the planet. It seemed to him that perhaps she was trying to hide her heritage from the group, maybe even from herself. Danziger didn't see what the big deal was. So what if she was born and raised on Earth, he pondered. Why is that supposed to be so bad? Danziger sure as hell wasn't going to cast any stones her way considering his own meager beginnings.  
  
Besides, John reflected to himself, though he'd never say it out loud, he'd always been kind of fond of Bess' original dialect. It brought to mind an attractive, not to mention extremely feisty, barmaid he'd dated many years back when he was in the military. She'd been a first generation station dweller with a twang almost as pronounced as Bess' used to be. Jeez, those were crazy times, he remembered as a small smile briefly crossed his lips.  
  
Quickly realizing that he had more important matters to attend to, Danziger shook himself back to his present circumstances. He met Bess' eyes and offered her a reassuring nod which she returned.  
  
Meanwhile, apparently their words had swayed at least one member of Eden Advance to their side of the argument.  
  
"I believe that Bess and John are correct," Yale spoke up, further adding to Devon's agitation. "It appears that no good would come by worrying about what is already behind us. The best course of action is to continue to move forward and be grateful that, although we have no recollection of the actual incident, somehow we have greatly improved our relationship with the Terrians."  
  
After vanquishing the drawl from her speech pattern, Bess encouraged, "And if the Terrians finally trust us and accept that Uly is the link between our species, then there shouldn't be any problem with them helping the rest of the Syndrome children when they get here on the colony ship, right Alonzo?"  
  
The pilot shook his head in agreement. "I haven't talked to them about that yet, but I doubt there will be any problem with the Terrians healing the other children like they did Uly."  
  
"One thing's for sure," Danziger commented, sifting his fingers through his curls. "Whatever we did in those mountains must have been pretty damned important."  
  
"It was," Alonzo responded earnestly. "Hopefully, more than you'll ever know."  
  
There were a few moments of silence as most of the other colonists wrestled with their conscience along with their natural curiosity.  
  
Baines was still unsure how to proceed and hoped that the other Edenites would know what to do. "So should we vote on launching an investigation?" he asked pensively as he looked at Mazatl who had stayed quiet throughout most of the discussion.  
  
The dark-haired man responded with a shrug of indifference. As far as he was concerned, the outcome of the matter was irrelevant to him. Whatever the group decided to do, Eben was still dead. Mazatl didn't care about much else any more.  
  
Finally, Denner took a stand on the issue. "Well, if we're voting then I vote no." Her eyes instinctively drifted to Cameron sitting to her left. "I don't want be responsible for any of us getting hurt."  
  
"Me, neither," Cameron determined. "As uncomfortable as I feel knowing that the Terrians messed with our brains, finding out the truth sounds like it'll be nothing but trouble."  
  
A few more seconds passed before Walman slapped his knees and remarked, "Ah, hell, I can't believe I'm saying this, but count me as a no."  
  
"Me, too," Magus exclaimed, glad that she wouldn't be alone in voting against Devon. As much as she tried not to be bothered by their leader's frigid demeanor, Adair almost always managed to intimidate the heck out of the Ops crewwoman.  
  
Julia exhaled deeply. Even though there were several holes in Alonzo's story that were large enough to fly a freighter through, she believed that she'd heard enough to make the correct determination. "I also vote no."  
  
"I don't believe this!" Devon seethed, now realizing that she was going to be outvoted, and not liking it one bit.  
  
Morgan also recognized that he held a minority opinion and muttered sourly, "You people have gone insane."  
  
Bess placed her hand on her husband's upper leg and reasoned in a saintly voice, "Morgan, Honey, let's just be happy that we're safe and sound and drop the whole thing."  
  
Morgan snorted and shook his head in response, inducing Bess to remove her hand from his thigh and fold her arms in front of her. She turned to address the gathering and ended up resting her eyes on Danziger a few yards away.  
  
"I vote no," she said with fortitude as their gazes briefly locked on each other.  
  
John, again, found himself wearing a small grin. "So do I," he relayed.  
  
__________  
  
Much later that evening in the Martin quarters, Bess awoke to the sounds of an exasperated Morgan as he unsuccessfully tried to unerase nine days worth of memories which had formerly been archived in his gear-log.  
  
After noticing that he'd disturbed his wife out of her sleep, he motioned to the equipment and groused, "This damn thing is useless. No matter what I do, it just keeps reading 'all records deleted'."  
  
He set the gear on the crate next to his chair. "The Terrians must have forced me to erase everything to keep from being caught red-handed," he muttered to himself.  
  
Bess squinted in the near-darkness of the tent as she tried to make out the silhouette of her husband. "Morgan, I thought that we all agreed that we weren't going to search for clues about the last week," she reminded him as she lazily sat up and stretched.  
  
"I didn't agree, Bess. I voted for an inquiry."  
  
"I know, Honey, but just about everyone else voted against it. We're part of the group and we have to abide by their decisions," she pointed out. "Anyway, you heard what Alonzo said. It could be dangerous to some of us if the truth comes out."  
  
The bureaucrat gaped at her with bulging eyes, ranting, "And that doesn't bother you the least little bit? That we were part of something so horrible- so hideous- that two of us could die just by finding out what it is? Who knows what the Terrians did to us! Oh, God, who knows what they did to me!"  
  
He snatched up his gear and haphazardly started hitting buttons. "No. They aren't going to get away with this. Alonzo and the Terrians are hiding something and I'm going to find out what it is."  
  
Bess sighed heavily. She was still pretty angry with him about the fight they'd had days before in which Morgan had made several hurtful comments about class distinctions. That argument had yet to be resolved. Now, part of her was infuriated that her husband was continuing to search for evidence with total disregard for the safety of her and the crew.  
  
However, another part of Bess understood that his actions were motivated by fear (at least in the latter case) and she felt a certain amount of sympathy toward him. She considered for a moment the best course of action to placate him. Any annoyance that she fostered was carefully masked by a pleasant smile.  
  
"Morgan, Sweetie," she indulged, taking on a maternal tone. "You're good with computers, right?"  
  
"Well, uh, I do know a few things-" Morgan acknowledged, involuntarily raising his chin and straightening up in his seat as he began to mentally catalog his expertise.  
  
"You know a lot of things, especially about computers," she interrupted, her voice oozing with charm. "Now, if someone had forced you to delete your journal against your will, don't you think that you would have found a way to attach a code or a link so you could retrieve the data at a later date?"  
  
The liaison paused and reflected, deep in thought as he considered the notion. "I, um," he stumbled before reluctantly admitting, "Uh, I guess it's possible."  
  
Bess allowed her grin to widen and gushed, "I know you, Morgan Martin, and if you'd wanted that information to be saved, you would've figured out a way to do it."  
  
"Okay, maybe you're right about that, but-"  
  
"But nothing," she said brightly, finishing the statement for him. She patted the mattress invitingly. "Now, come back to bed, so we can put this whole ugly business behind us."  
  
Sensing that her work was done for the night, Bess resettled herself under the blankets and shut her eyes, immediately falling back to sleep.  
  
Morgan hesitantly set his cherished gear-set back on the crate and stood up with the intention of joining his wife in their bunk. However, as he took his first step toward her, a new idea hit him. Perhaps, for whatever reason, he'd been prevented from placing a code or message on his own gear, but somehow had gotten the opportunity to encrypt some type of clue on Bess' device. As quietly as possible, he rummaged through her belongings, finally locating her equipment dangling from the front pocket of her jacket. He tiptoed to the opposite corner of the tent and began to tinker with the machine, searching for anything that might alert him to the vast Terrian conspiracy that he knew had to be behind this.  
  
Upon examining the apparatus, he easily came to the conclusion that indeed there was some sort of glitch in Bess' equipment. Although the earlier dates in her gear-log were accessible, each time he instructed the machine to retrieve any entries made in the last nine days, he was given the simple reply of 'none recorded'.  
  
That can't be correct, Morgan thought. The message should instead be reading 'all records deleted'. He rechecked the sensors and the battery pack and tried again with the same results. Of course, there had to be something wrong with the device, Morgan concluded in his mind. After all, Bess was a stickler about keeping up with her journal and there was no way that she would go for nine days without...  
  
Suddenly, Morgan felt all the air rush out of him and the gear-set slipped from his hands and fell to the dirt ground.  
  
"Oh, no, no, no, no. It can't be," he whispered in horror to his wife's slumbering form. "Your log entries weren't erased because you never recorded any in the first place."  
  
Alonzo's words of warning started to swirl in the liaison's head. *Trust me, Morgan. You agreed with all of this completely.* *Both... were badly injured.* *They were going to die.* *A vote wasn't needed.* *Digging for the truth...will most likely sign the death warrant for one or both of the people who were injured.*  
  
"Oh, Bess," he spoke softly and could barely say the words out loud. "It was you. You were one of them. You didn't keep up with your journal because you were too sick- or hurt- or whatever happened to you. My poor, sweet, beautiful Bess."  
  
It was at that moment that Morgan decided that he would forever keep his terrible discovery a secret and would never ever probe into the events that took place in the mountain range. He knew in his heart that he could never do anything that would possibly bring harm to his beloved wife. Bess was everything to him. She was his life.  
  
Bess sat up when she noticed that her spouse still hadn't come to bed. "Are you okay, Honey?"  
  
Morgan cleared his throat and quickly replaced the gear in her jacket pocket.  
  
"Uh, yeah, Bess," he answered as he sat next to her on the edge of the cot. He swallowed hard and successfully blinked back the tears filling his eyes. "I-I just love you so much," he expressed sincerely.  
  
The Earth-res gave him an enchanting smile as he tilted forward and lightly brushed his lips against hers. "I love you, too," she replied.  
  
Morgan encircled his arms around her and kissed her again, this time more forcefully. As their embrace deepened, he eased Bess back onto the bed and it wasn't long before they were making love.  
  
Bess closed her eyes and, to her surprise, she abruptly flashed to a different scenario; one where she was still engaged in the act of lovemaking, but not with her spouse. It was with a very different man, someone whom she hadn't fantasized about since their first few weeks on the planet.  
  
Her breath quickened as she found herself imagining the feel of his body against hers as they moved together; the tingling sensation of his whiskers brushing against her softer skin; his taste as he devoured her with kisses; the gentle yet powerful touch of his hands intimately exploring her. She could clearly see the look of devotion in her lover's blue eyes, so full of desire, trust and another emotion that was far too unsettling for Bess to contemplate.  
  
Bess inwardly chastised herself, not only for thinking such unbridled thoughts about another member of Eden Advance, but for enjoying it so immensely. Where on earth had those erotic images come from? And why did it feel so incredibly real?  
  
After holding on to the reverie a few moments longer than she knew that she should have, Bess attempted to banish the thoughts of the other man from her mind. Her eyes remained clamped shut as she tried to explain away the impassioned yet perplexing sensations she'd just experienced. There had to be a perfectly legitimate reason as to why she would suddenly crave the physical company of a man she considered to be a friend- the same friend whom her husband despised. Certainly she and Morgan had been having some marital troubles of late, but they'd always managed to work things out before.  
  
Besides, Morgan not only loves her, he needs her to take care of him. And taking care of those around her was what she'd done for most of her life. Not only was she very good at it, she thrived on the fulfillment it gave her. As for the object of her fantasy, he played the role of a caregiver, too, though she'd classify him as more of a physical protector than an emotional one. When it came down to it, Bess couldn't ever imagine John Danziger needing anyone to take care of him.  
  
Yes, she'd already made her choice when she'd pledged before the eyes of God and her friends that she would be married to Morgan for the rest of her life. Maybe a healthy marriage just takes a lot of time and good, old- fashioned elbow grease, Bess surmised to herself. Perhaps she should pray for some additional guidance about dealing with some of her husband's less positive traits. And while she's at it, she should probably also ask God for some more patience.  
  
Hopefully, things will get better once we reach New Pacifica, Bess reflected as she opened her eyes and pulled Morgan into a passionate kiss.  
  
__________ 


	20. 20/20

Learning Experiences: Chapter 20  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They're Amblin's and Universal's.  
  
Rating: PG-13 (language, violence, adult themes)  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
At the same time, Danziger was busy doting on his cherished vehicles. He slowly dislodged himself from under the console of the Transrover and let out a heavy sigh as he settled himself into the driver's seat. He tried to enter several codes into the control panel, but found that he was having trouble focusing on the tasks at hand. The mechanic couldn't believe how tired he still was, despite having snoozed most of the day. Whatever the Terrians had done to them to make them forget the past nine days, he hoped that the effects would wear off soon. It was bad enough that he was just as exhausted as when he came to that morning, not to mention that he was still feeling pretty weak. Worst of all, he'd suffered a couple of temporary spells of lightheadedness and had counted himself lucky that no one else had been around to witness the incidents.  
  
I'm probably just coming down with one of those summer colds that Julia's always warning us about, John resolved in his mind. He made the conscious decision not to think about any other possibilities as to why he would suddenly be feeling less than his normal self.  
  
Danziger rubbed at his eyes with the heels of his hands and tried to shake himself awake. He considered the idea of turning in for the night, but nixed it when he thought of the large number of chores that required his immediate and undivided attention. He knew that he'd feel personally responsible if something important hadn't been taken care of in a timely manner because he'd allowed himself to slack off in his obligations to the group. And, God forbid, any of the vehicles ever broke down due to his negligence. Danziger paused for a moment. He didn't even want to conceptualize such an awful predicament.  
  
Just then, the passenger side door swung open, jostling John back to his senses. He didn't need to look up to know the identity of his visitor.  
  
"Daniziger," she nodded coolly.  
  
"Adair," he greeted as Devon climbed into the cab and offered him a cup of coffee.  
  
John gazed at the mug oddly before taking it from her hands, a bit surprised that the leader would, not only seek out his company, but arrive bearing a peace offering.  
  
"Thanks. I really needed that," he said gratefully after taking several strong gulps of the hot liquid.  
  
Devon's eyes listlessly wandered around the car's interior. "Can't sleep either?" she evenly inquired.  
  
Danziger set the now-empty cup on the flat ledge located behind the seats and lightly snorted. "Well, I did nap most of the day," he noted as he began typing a series of combinations into the vehicle's computer. He made sure to concentrate intently on what he was doing so Devon didn't realize how disoriented he truly was. "Things gotta get done."  
  
Devon straightened up and looked over his shoulder to view the console. "Is there something wrong with the 'Rover?"  
  
"Nope. Just getting a jump on programming tomorrow's route. I figure that everyone'll want to get out of here as early as possible in the morning," he informed her. "I also wanted to give the vehicles a quick once-over to make sure they're in okay shape for traveling. After all, they did sit around for more than a week."  
  
Adair sank back into her seat, obviously disappointed by his answer. "Oh."  
  
Danziger stopped and swerved his suspicious gaze toward her. "Why? What did you think I was doing?"  
  
"I guess I thought that maybe you'd changed your mind and you were in here looking for clues," Devon replied.  
  
Danziger furrowed his brows in disapproval.  
  
"Oh, don't look at me like that," she spat defensively at the frown that had overtaken the mechanic's face. "I mean, how can you just let it all go without at least trying to find a few missing pieces to the puzzle? I don't know, something- anything that could help us to understand what happened to us?"  
  
John exhaled sharply. He wasn't eager to be pulled into another needless debate with Devon. They'd had way too many of those since she'd been released from cold sleep and it was starting to get old. Instead, he shook his head and quietly started to gather his tools that were strewn across the floorboard and between the two seats.  
  
Unfortunately, the mechanic's silence only fueled Devon's anger. She inwardly steamed that, not only was she unable to influence Danziger's point of view, she couldn't even get a rise out of him. And she definitely wasn't thrilled by the realization that, since she'd spurned his advances a few weeks earlier, he was becoming harder and harder to read... and to manage.  
  
She continued in an antagonizing tone, "And to tell you the truth, I'm really surprised at your sudden change in attitude. The John Danziger that I know would never have bought into that ridiculous fairy tale that Alonzo tried selling us this evening."  
  
Yeah well, maybe you don't know me as well as you thought, lady, Danziger bitterly mused to himself before relaying, "I never said that I believed Solace. Far from it, as a matter of fact. Every one of us knows that part, if not all of his story is a bald-faced lie."  
  
He roughly grabbed a wrench next to her feet as his own irritation momentarily got the better of him. "Jesus, Devon, don't you think that I'm just as curious and worried about this as you are? I'm pissed as hell that some of us almost got killed and we don't even know the reason behind it."  
  
He hopped out of the vehicle and expelled another deep breath to collect himself before turning to face her. "I may not trust the Diggers as far as I can throw 'em, but I trust Alonzo with my life. And if he says that we're better off not knowing, then I say that we consider ourselves lucky to be alive and move on. Plus, we have the assurance that the kids weren't involved. That's good enough for me."  
  
He leaned forward in the cab and pointed his finger at her, telling her in a low but stern voice, "And it should be good enough for you."  
  
Feeling that he'd made his opinion abundantly clear, he promptly took off toward the Dunerail situated about fifteen yards away. He assumed that Devon's response to him would involve more yelling and, quite possibly, spare tools being used as projectiles. And Danziger wasn't going to leave himself an open target for either.  
  
Devon was about to shout an appropriate retort to his biting remark when John walked away before she was given the chance to reply. Not at all pleased by Danziger getting in the final word or by his continued resistance to her stance on the issue, she briefly contemplated throwing a nearby spanner at his retreating head. However, she decided against it after recognizing that hitting him wouldn't change his mind. Plus, she no longer had a clear shot at him.  
  
What the hell is wrong with that man? He should be angrier than I am about this, she fumed as she exited the 'Rover and began to march toward the Dunerail. After all, John had obviously been affected by whatever job Eden Advance had performed for the Terrians. He was so tired that he'd slept the entire day in the back of the Dunerail. And even with the twin moons as her only source of light, Devon could see how pale he looked.  
  
She reached Danziger's feet sticking out from under the 'Rail and paused as her gut twisted itself into a knot. The leader had been so consumed by her loss of control of the situation that she hadn't really considered the identities of the two injured crewmen beyond the worry that it had been her, Uly or Yale. Now for the first time, Devon wondered...  
  
Danziger had been relieved when it had appeared that Devon wasn't going to follow him to the Dunerail to further continue their argument. However, just as he had wedged the upper half of his body under the vehicle's main frame, he'd heard her footsteps approach and halt directly next to where he was working.  
  
The woman is incapable of allowing anyone else to have the last word, Danziger sourly thought. He involuntarily winced as he mentally prepared himself for the unwanted role of Devon's verbal punching bag. As a result, he was taken completely by surprise at the softness and sincerity in her voice as she spoke to him.  
  
"It could have been you, you know," she whispered. "You may have almost died back there."  
  
John quickly shuffled himself out from under the vehicle causing a haze of dust to migrate around him. He was eager to see if the look on Devon's face matched her words of concern. She couldn't possibly be worried about him, could she? As much as he tried to fight it, a small part of Danziger leapt for joy at the possibility that Devon would care about his well-being.  
  
By the time he'd met her gaze, Devon had already rehardened her features, though she did give off the impression that she was a bit upset. Danziger felt the need to reassure her and calm any fears that may be buried beneath the surface.  
  
"I guess it's possible. But if it was me, I'm fine now," he fibbed with a shrug, trying to appear nonchalant.  
  
The leader seemed satisfied by his response. "Good," she said quietly as a smile briefly flickered across her face. She looked away, embarrassed that John had seen how deeply his welfare could affect her. That is, if she allowed it to.  
  
She turned back toward him and met his penetrating gaze, neither of them saying anything to each other for several seconds. At last, Devon broke the awkward stillness. "So, um, I'd better get back before Uly misses me," she said, taking a few steps backward and nearly tripping over a Koba sized rock in the process.  
  
"Don't stay up too late, John," she suggested. Despite her efforts to the contrary, the corners of her mouth arched upward and a full smile shone through. "Can't have you sleeping all of your days away."  
  
Danziger lightly chortled in response. God, how he wished that they could have more moments like this. The uncomfortable stares and silences they used to share; the playful banter and one-upmanship. The way things used to be before she was taken ill and the ice-princess of the Stations had reemerged. John was pleased at the occasional opportunity to get a glimpse of the Devon that he used to know and still loved. The Devon Adair of the first six months of their journey had to be in that frame of hers somewhere.  
  
"Hey, Adair," John impulsively called out to her after she'd turned around to head back toward her tent.  
  
Devon stopped, but continued to face the opposite direction.  
  
"I was glad to hear Alonzo say that you weren't one of them. You know, one of the two who were hurt."  
  
The leader remained motionless for many moments before finally rotating her gaze back to him. Her expression and posturing reminded John of a marble statue. Hard, unyielding and cold.  
  
"See you in the morning, Danziger," she said indifferently and walked away without another word.  
  
"Yeah," John grunted, sadly recognizing that the Devon of the last three months had resurfaced, eclipsing the warm and caring woman that he'd dreamed of spending the rest of his life with. Maybe if he just gave her time.  
  
_____  
  
With each step that Devon took as she hurried back to her quarters, another brick was replaced in the self-imposed wall that she'd built to barricade John from her heart.  
  
What am I thinking, she scolded herself. I don't want and I certainly don't need a man in my life. Especially a man who lacks the good sense to let me call the shots.  
  
She raised the flap and was about to cross the threshold of her tent when she found herself pivoting back once more to watch Danziger as he dutifully inspected the undercarriage of the Dunerail. While she studied him, Devon felt a surge of emotion course through her body and couldn't help but acknowledge (if only to herself) that she was attracted to him.  
  
Hmm, perhaps a compromise might be in order. Maybe, just maybe, it wouldn't be so bad if I were to take him on as an occasional lover, she contemplated.  
  
Devon grinned slyly at the thought. It would certainly be one of her more challenging ventures, that was for sure. Of course, there would be limitations and Danziger would need to understand that there could never be any permanent arrangements between them. It would have to stay a physical relationship with no strings attached, pure and simple. After all, her first priority should and would always be setting up and running the colony of New Pacifica.  
  
She entered her quarters and gave a sleeping Uly a quick kiss on the forehead before excitedly climbing into her own cot across the room. She remained wide awake as she began to run tactical scenarios in her mind on how to get Danziger to agree to such a relationship.  
  
_____  
  
Now that Devon had left him alone, Danziger could get some work done. He repositioned himself beneath the 'Rail and began to examine its components. And he wasn't pleased with what he saw. It looked as though the part he'd retrofitted to replace the crystal fuse that Gaal had stolen months before was almost completely rusted through.  
  
Jeez, just what I needed, he inwardly scoffed. What the hell am I gonna do when it gives out?  
  
Danziger's mind spun as he mentally inventoried the extra parts that he could piece together to create a new fuse, but came up empty. Dammit, there had to be something that he could do. There was no way in hell that he was leaving a vehicle behind. Not without a fight, anyway. If he could just keep the Dunerail running until they stumbled across another cargo pod that contained mechanical supplies. That is, if the Grendlers hadn't pillaged it first and made worthless trinkets out of everything.  
  
Wait a minute, John thought, maybe I'm going about this all wrong. Suppose the Grendlers had already raided the pods and confiscated Eden Project's property. That could mean that there's a brand new crystal fuse, or at least something close to it that he could modify, laying in wait in a nearby warren. More than that, it was entirely possible that the Grendlers had located cargo pods thousands of miles away and then utilized the spider tunnels to transport the stolen provisions back to their dens, some of which had to be along the Advancers traveling route.  
  
Danziger's initial instinct was to organize search parties to locate and raid the Grendler stashes to take back what was rightfully theirs to begin with. However, he quickly changed his mind for two very important reasons. First, recklessly charging in to ransack the beast's homes could be dangerous, if not violent. And enough blood had already been spilled since Eden Project had arrived planetside. John briefly closed his eyes in shame as he thought of the Grendler who had accidentally died at his hands. He wasn't going to let that happen, again.  
  
Secondly, he and the other members of the group were going to be stuck on G889 for at least another fifteen months until the Jamestown arrived. Hell, some of them were going to be living out the rest of their lives in New Pacifica. Therefore, perhaps he should examine ways to reclaim their goods that didn't involve upsetting the locals.  
  
Maybe it was time to start trading- really trading- with the Grendlers to get what they needed. And not just for spare parts either. The Grendlers had access to food, clothing, medical equipment... maybe even more vehicles. And, at this point, Eden Advance needed anything and everything they could get their hands on.  
  
Danziger had recognized that the group's morale had been down during the past month or two. The brutally hot weather coupled with infighting among the crew had really damaged everyone's ability to work as a unit. John knew that he was guilty of it too, although he did his best to stay out of the line of fire. Replenishing their supplies with the aid of the Grendlers could really help in raising the group's spirits. Danziger knew from firsthand experience the positive effect a full stomach and a new pair of shoes can have on a person.  
  
He removed himself from the 'Rail's undercarriage and attempted to ignore the wave of dizziness that momentarily rendered him incapable of sitting up on his own. He rested against the frame of the vehicle and cursed himself for letting a simple cold-bug get the better of him. Once his symptoms subsided, he concentrated on fleshing out the details of turning his idea into a worthwhile project that could benefit everyone.  
  
Almost immediately, Danziger knew that he wasn't going to be able to do this on his own. He would definitely require some help, maybe even a partner. Somebody for him to bounce his ideas off of and who, hopefully, could provide some insight of his or her own. It would need to be someone who was intelligent, resourceful and had an in-depth knowledge of Eden Advance's supplies. Somebody who he could trust and would be willing to work with him as a team.  
  
One person was instantly propelled to the forefront of John's mind: Bess Martin. Not only did she have all of the qualities Danziger was looking for, she already possessed extensive bartering skills that she'd learned while growing up on Earth. She'd also been the first of the Edenites to take the initiative and trade with a Grendler.  
  
And she was tough, too. Danziger had been duly impressed by her performance that evening at the campfire. Not only did she stand up to Devon, she'd rallied the other colonists into deciding against a search for answers about those missing days. She'd even voted against Morgan for the second time in a row. Yep, John decided confidently, Bess was the obvious and most practical choice for the job.  
  
Danziger temporarily pushed aside his concerns about the dilapidating vehicles and the improvement of Grendler relations and replaced them with thoughts of the charming Earth-res. A warm smile crept across his face. He didn't know Bess all that well because their duties to the group were different and, as a result, they had very little interaction with each other. However, over time, John had come to understand that the woman was clearly a force to be reckoned with. She was goodhearted, strong-willed and a helluva lot smarter than she was usually given credit for.  
  
He'd certainly changed his opinion of Bess since they'd been introduced to each other a few days after the crash. John wasn't proud to admit that, at first, he'd misjudged her, casually dismissing her as nothing more than an extension of her self-serving husband. He continually underestimated her abilities along with the true value of her contributions to the group. Instead, both he and Devon had most often relegated her to the trivial and thankless role as the baby-sitter of their children.  
  
Boy, had he ever been wrong. John didn't know what he would have done without Bess' assistance after Devon had been placed in cryo-sleep and he was suddenly and unpreparedly left in charge of Eden Advance. She'd been an amazing help to him when it came to supervising the inventory, seeing that the kids were taken care of and countless other responsibilities that had slipped his notice. And when she'd realized how distraught he was over Devon's illness and being forced to continue the journey without her, Bess had come to him as a friend, offering comfort and to be a private audience for him to voice his feelings of grief. Of course, he'd turned her down, but he'd appreciated the effort anyway.  
  
Danziger sighed as he realized that he'd never really thanked her for her steadfast support and for getting him through one of the toughest times of his life. Maybe he would express his gratitude when he approached her about working together on his plan to open trading channels with the Grendlers.  
  
Although Bess' tendency to meddle in other people's affairs did put him off a bit, Danziger had trouble thinking of any negative personality traits that he could attribute to her. It wasn't until he'd gathered his strength and lumbered to his feet that John remembered the quality that, without a doubt, he would classify as Bess' greatest flaw as a human being: She had terrible taste in husbands.  
  
__________  
  
Julia's eyes were shut, but a peaceful slumber eluded her. Try as she might to avoid thinking about it, her worried mind persistently wandered to the circumstances, known and unknown, of the past nine days. Over and over again, she reviewed her final memories of falling asleep curled up next to Alonzo on their second night in the valley, only to awake with a splitting headache in front of the Transrover more than a week later.  
  
It also hadn't escaped her notice that several items had disappeared from her medical stock when she'd checked it earlier in the evening. Curiously, it seemed to be mostly hyposprays of cardiac enhancers and nutritional supplements. To her, this heavily implied that the colonists who had been placed in danger had not sustained physical injuries such as lacerations or contusions. Instead, it led her to believe that their inflicted trauma had been an illness which perhaps had resulted in some type of coronary distress. The sickest may also have been too weak to eat solid food, or possibly even been comatose.  
  
Additionally, though her inventory logs had obviously been faked to read that nothing was amiss, there was one glaring mistake in the revised calculations. Julia was surprised to find that a single dose of beta- blockers remained unaccounted for. She wondered if the inaccuracy had been intentionally left as a clue or was nothing more than an oversight made during their mad rush to delete any potentially harmful data. There was also the possibility that one of the injured parties had been administered the medication after the log had been altered and there simply hadn't been time to adjust the count.  
  
Further adding to Julia's confusion was her realization that there were also several injections of sedaderms absent from her supplies. She had no idea what might have occurred as to require their use, but some of the possibilities made her nervous.  
  
At the campfire, Julia had trusted Alonzo enough to vote against launching a probe into finding out the truth. However, a small part of her was now reconsidering her decision. Although she had completely recovered from the discomfort she'd suffered from when she'd regained consciousness that morning, a few of the crew members had remained tired, most especially Danziger. She couldn't deny her concern that perhaps he and the others might still be suffering the ill-effects of whatever the Terrians had subjected them to.  
  
The doctor sighed to herself and opened her eyes. She needed some answers, or at least further affirmation from Alonzo that the Terrians had truly restored her friends to their full health. She rolled over in her cot and was startled to find herself alone. She quickly rose from her bed to search for her missing lover, throwing on an outer shirt and shoving her feet into her unlaced boots in one fluent motion.  
  
Not long after she'd exited her dwelling, Julia's attention was drawn to a familiar shadow projected along the canvas wall of the meal tent a few yards away. She followed its form until she came upon a brooding Alonzo who was peering toward the opposite end of camp. He was tilting his weight forward and resting his elbows on a chest-high pile of stacked boxes which almost completely obscured him from view.  
  
She joined the pilot at his side and leaned against the crates, their shoulders and arms touching.  
  
"I didn't hear you leave," she said to him quietly.  
  
Alonzo didn't acknowledge her with the exception of a mild nod. Julia arched her head around to carefully study his features and was a bit taken aback. There was a deep crease in his brow and she briefly considered reaching out to smooth the skin with her fingers. Moreover, his posturing was rigid and his jaw was tightly clenched. There was also a look of deep sadness in his eyes as he gazed out into the darkness as if something weighed very heavily on his heart. Julia could clearly see that the events of the past week, whatever they had been, had had a life-changing effect on him. The carefree pilot whom she'd fallen in love with months before was almost completely gone. In his place was a man who looked as though he felt every bit of his one hundred and ten years of age.  
  
"Did you have a Terrian dream tonight?" she asked, her attempt to sound casual failing miserably.  
  
"No," Solace bitterly muttered, still not veering his eyes. "I think I've had enough of those to last me awhile."  
  
Their conversation was interrupted by a shuffling sound emanating from the other end of the campsite where Eden Project's three vehicles were parked. Julia and Alonzo watched in silence as Danziger staggered to the standing position next to the Dunerail and dusted himself off. Not knowing that he was being observed, John didn't attempt to hide his fatigued state while he wearily replaced the tools in his nearly worn-out belt. He barely lifted his feet as he slowly dragged himself back to his tent, kicking up small clouds of dirt in the process.  
  
After the mechanic vanished from their view, Julia turned her head back toward Solace and took a deep breath. "It's him, isn't it? John was the one who almost didn't make it."  
  
Alonzo refused to answer, essentially confirming that she'd hit the nail right on the head. She let several seconds pass before apprehensively disclosing, "Maybe I shouldn't say this, but I've been thinking a lot about what happened today. My first memory of this morning is waking up and seeing you staring at the ATV. That's where Danziger was. You looked so frightened, like you weren't sure if he was alive."  
  
A bleak expression overtook Solace's face as she spoke, further validating that her assertions were correct.  
  
She continued, "I've also been reviewing your explanation, specifically what you said and who you said it to. You were very precise with your words, especially when it came to which pronouns you used. I know that you gave us clues about which of us had been hurt and, more importantly, which of us hadn't been. You cleared yourself, me, the children and Devon. And I'm pretty sure that you cleared Morgan, too. You were also careful to divulge information that would mean certain things to certain people."  
  
Julia laced her fingers through his as she relayed, "I'm not sure who the second person is but, based upon what you've told us, it would make sense that Danziger was one of the victims. My guess is that the Terrians told us that there was some risk involved in whatever they needed us to do for them. John's been the protector of our group since the first day we arrived on this planet. I can see him stepping forward and volunteering for anything potentially dangerous in order to keep the rest of us safe."  
  
Alonzo pulled his hand from her grasp and looked away. The physician reached out and gently touched his cheek before easing his gaze back to her.  
  
"I'm not asking you for any specifics or even for confirmation of anything that I just said," she said sincerely. "But what I do need to hear from you is that everyone is out of harms way. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if Danziger or any of the others were injured and I did nothing to help them."  
  
Solace nervously began shifting his feet. After witnessing Danziger's continued haggard appearance, Alonzo had already concluded that it would be necessary to alert Julia to certain aspects of the mechanic's medical status. The critical decision currently facing the pilot was exactly how much to give away without potentially worsening the situation.  
  
He solemnly revealed, "John should get most of his strength back in a few days as long as he takes it easy. But to be honest with you, I don't know if he'll ever be completely back to his old self, again. There's probably been some permanent damage to his heart." He shook his head in dismay while Julia's eyes noticeably widened in worry. "We'd hoped that it wouldn't be too serious and that he'd be able to go back to leading a normal life. But that was before this morning when he-" He halted his words, quickly determining that the details of John's collapse should, at least for the time being, remain concealed.  
  
"Let's just say that now I'm not so sure," he finished.  
  
"'Lonz, what happened to him?" Julia posed in a troubled voice. Her mind raced as she rapidly analyzed what she knew and tried to come up with a plausible explanation. "Did he develop some type of an infection, maybe as a result from being exposed to a toxic substance? When I diagnosed his condition, did I used the term cardiomyopathy?"  
  
"I'm not gonna play twenty questions with you about this," he snapped back in an atypical display of huffiness. "I can't tell you."  
  
"I'm sorry," Julia expressed, immediately regretting that she'd pushed the issue. "I wasn't trying to pressure you into revealing things that I'm not supposed to hear. I'm just worried about him, that's all." She sighed before earnestly declaring, "John is more than our friend. He's like a member of our family."  
  
"I know," Alonzo agreed, recalling the similar statement he'd made about Bess and John the previous day. His tone softened, although it still had a somber edge to it. "At this point, Danziger seems to be in pretty good shape, all things considered, and I really don't think that he's in any immediate danger. But we'll watch him carefully just to be sure, all right? And if he takes a turn for the worse and you need to be filled in on some of the background information about his health, so be it." He recaptured her hand, relaying, "Either way, we have to continue to keep this to ourselves, okay?"  
  
Julia nodded her approval before asking, "Do you think John knows that it's him?"  
  
"He probably suspects it, yeah," he shrugged. "But I doubt that he'll say anything or go out of his way to investigate the matter. He knows what could happen to him if he finds out the truth. Plus, he wouldn't want to take the chance of hurting the other person involved."  
  
"But what about that other person?" the doctor questioned pensively. "Shouldn't we be keeping our eyes on him- or her, too?"  
  
"The other one doesn't look any worse for the wear," he responded, inwardly thankful that Bess seemed to have landed on her feet and fully regained her emotional and physical health. "As long as everything stays buried, there should be a complete recovery."  
  
"And if anyone else in the group figures out either of their identities?"  
  
Alonzo thought of Morgan and Devon, the only two who'd voted in favor of launching an investigation and the only two who could conceivably continue the hunt for damaging evidence.  
  
"If they do, I can almost guarantee that they'll keep the news to themselves. They'd have to know that coming forward would only end up hurting people they care about."  
  
He grabbed Julia's other hand and gave both sets of fingers a squeeze. "And, while were on the subject, there's something that I need you to do. I want you to promise me that you won't give Danziger or anyone else any medical treatment for at least a month unless it's an emergency. That means no weekly physicals, no blood pressure checks and absolutely, positively no alpha scans. I don't want you even taking their temperatures unless their very survival is at risk."  
  
He further tightened his grip and looked deeply into her eyes, silently begging her to comply with his request. "Will you give me your word that you'll do this?"  
  
Julia could see by the pilot's grave expression that it was crucial that she followed his instructions to the letter. Although she wasn't thrilled by the idea of taking an extended leave of absence from her profession, she was confident that Alonzo knew what he was doing and had the crew's best interest at heart. Furthermore, she didn't want to inadvertently stumble upon medical knowledge that could end up destroying the lives of her friends. The decision was not a difficult one to make.  
  
"I promise," she consented. "Unless there's a critical situation, it looks like I'm unemployed for the next month or so."  
  
Solace let out a relief-filled breath as he released her hands. "Good. Thank you."  
  
Although his anxiety seemed to be eased by Julia's acquiescence, a look of unhappiness lingered in his eyes, prompting the doctor to comment, "I'm worried about you, 'Lonz. You've been changed by this experience, too, haven't you?"  
  
His expression grew darker. "For one thing, I'm not sure that I can ever completely trust the Terrians again," he told her honestly. "I know that they didn't intend to hurt anyone, but that doesn't mean that I can just wipe the slate clean. I have to live with the memories of what Danziger and the others went through."  
  
Solace shook his head before lifting his saddened gaze skyward. His voice began to quiver as he recounted, "God, Querida, it was awful. I couldn't stop it. I-I tried, but there was nothing I could do. I saw everything. There was so much suffering. So much pain-" He let the words trail off, too overcome with emotion to continue.  
  
It nearly broke Julia's heart to see her lover in such despair. Tears filled both of their eyes as she welcomed him into her comforting arms. Alonzo rested his head on her shoulder and she held him close while gently kneading the tension-riddled muscles in his back.  
  
After a time, Solace softly revealed, "I made two promises these last two days, both involving protection. One was made to all of you when we decided to leave the valley and the other was made specifically to John." He pulled back his head in order to meet Julia's eyes and solemnly expressed, "I intend to keep both of these commitments, whatever the cost."  
  
Although Julia was confused (and more than a little bit disturbed) by Alonzo's cryptic statements, as long as she had his assurance that everyone was safe, the details of what happened to the members of Eden Advance no longer interested her.  
  
She leaned in and lovingly kissed his cheek. "You can always trust me, Alonzo. Your secrets are, and will always be, safe with me." She wrapped her arms around him and whispered into his ear, "And I'll help you keep those promises of yours any way that I can."  
  
Alonzo hugged her tightly, absorbing the warmth and support that radiated from her body. When they finally parted, Julia silently began to lead him back to their shared quarters.  
  
God, he was tired. The stress from the past days and of what would be expected of him in the coming months was a bit overwhelming for him. Regardless of whether or not the crew remembered it, Solace had taken on the essential job of guardian for the Eden Project. And he swore to himself that he would watch over them carefully. He would safeguard them from the Terrians, should the creatures ever break their promise and attempt to test the group, again. He would also protect the Edenites from themselves, preventing them from bringing to light any details that could spell trouble for Bess and John- the two people who, unbeknownst to everyone but him, were responsible for humanity being granted a second chance on G889.  
  
Alonzo would look after all of them. Because he'd witnessed the majority of the Terrian's Dreamscape experiment, he'd been provided a front row seat to the innermost thoughts of many of the members of Eden Advance. He'd had unlimited access to information that was private, if not extremely delicate in nature. He'd seen their lifetime of memories. He'd been given a bird's-eye view to their deepest desires and their darkest fears. He'd learned the details of how several of his crewmates really felt about each other, no matter how hard they tried to conceal the emotions from themselves and one another. For a few of them, he'd seen the line that could be crossed that would cause them to break apart into pieces. In other words, Alonzo had found out things that he wasn't supposed to know. At this point, he probably knew some of his traveling companions better than they knew themselves.  
  
But instead of considering this unprecedented insight into the workings of their minds to be a liability, Solace was determined to use this unique knowledge to his advantage. Now that Alonzo understood how many of the Edenites think, it could very likely help him to decide the best approach when it comes to keeping them safe in the future.  
  
And very importantly, Alonzo was now aware of the depth of Mazatl's depression over Eben's heartbreaking death three months before. He would make sure that the crewman's despondency wasn't allowed to progress to the point that it had on the Dreamplane. Alonzo resolved that he would reach out to his friend and see if he could be of help. Maybe Solace could make a few innocent comments to Bess and get her to talk with him. After all, not only was she was good at that sort of thing, the pilot also recalled her many Dreamscape prayers asking God for forgiveness for Mazatl and for his acceptance into Heaven despite having committed the mortal sin of suicide.  
  
Alonzo sighed to himself. As awful as the past week and a half was, there could be a silver lining just beyond the black clouds. The Terrian's might have just provided Solace with the information that enabled him to save Mazatl's life.  
  
Alonzo and Julia continued to be lost within their own thoughts and no words were spoken between them as the entered their tent and climbed into bed. As she curled her limbs around him, Solace gazed devotedly at the woman who'd brought so much happiness into his life. He was gratified to hear her offer of complete and unquestioning future cooperation. Hopefully, aside from keeping tabs on Danziger's recuperation, it wouldn't be needed. With any luck, the other Edenites would be able to put this unfortunate experience behind them. Given a little time, the calamity of the last nine days would eventually become nothing more than a distant memory... or non-memory, as the case may be.  
  
Alonzo smiled as he closed his eyes and drifted off into a tranquil sleep. He was looking forward to things getting back to normal.  
  
__________  
  
  
  
EPILOGUE  
  
Nine months later, almost to the day, the members of Eden Project welcomed the birth of their very first baby. He was a beautiful little boy born to an elated Bess and Morgan Martin. He had wispy brown hair and light blue eyes and was the spitting image of Bess with the notable exception of an unusually strong jaw that didn't seem to match either parent. Despite being slightly larger in size than the average newborn, Julia joyously pronounced him to be in perfect health.  
  
They named the child Adam John- 'Adam' after Bess' youngest brother whom she'd more or less raised after her mother's untimely death. The middle name 'John' was bestowed in honor of his equally proud godfather, John Danziger. Of course, at first Morgan wasn't thrilled about his son carrying the name of his sworn adversary, but Bess hadn't really given him a choice in the matter. She was quick to point out the incredible help that the mechanic had been to them since she'd announced her pregnancy. And Morgan was grudgingly forced to concede that Danziger had been happy to share with him his wealth of knowledge when it came to raising a baby. John had even secretly built Bess a rocking chair exactly like the one she'd described to him based on a dream she'd had. He'd been almost bashful about the gift when he'd finally presented it to her just days before her due date.  
  
When it came to choosing a godmother for Adam, Morgan had originally considered asking Devon, thinking that there might be certain benefits to having the chief administrator of the colony as a pseudo-relative. However, Bess wouldn't hear of such a thing, reminding Morgan of how little interest Devon had taken in the Martin's pregnancy beyond how it would affect the leader's own schedule for constructing New Pacifica in time for the arrival of the Jamestown. Moreover, should something horrible befall her and Morgan, Bess certainly wasn't going to entrust the raising of her son to a woman whom she could barely stand to be in the same room with. Bess furthered that when Magus and Walman had recently announced their own impending parenthood, Devon had had the nerve to look disappointed and didn't offer them a single word of congratulation.  
  
Bess had also stressed to her husband the importance that both godparents possess the ability to get along with one another. And everyone knew that Devon and John had barely exchanged two civil words since they'd had that massive blowup back when Bess was still in the midst of her first trimester. When John had eventually confided in Bess regarding what had transpired between Devon and himself, the Earth-res didn't blame him for not wanting anything to do with the leader. Bess remembered the pain in John's eyes when he'd recounted Devon's indecent proposal suggesting that they begin a secret affair. Devon had also made sure to tack on the crushing reminder that, no matter what emotions Danziger harbored for her, she would never return his love and their relationship would never be permitted to progress beyond the feelings of physical gratification. Needless to say, her offer had been soundly and bitterly rejected by John and the two had barely spoken since.  
  
Instead, True Danziger was absolutely thrilled to be honored with the title of godmother to little Adam. Although Morgan thought that it was slightly unorthodox for a father and daughter to be chosen as godparents, he wasn't adverse to Bess' choice. Over the past few months, he'd noticed his wife's maternal instincts blossom as she and True had become much closer. Sometimes she'd fuss over the girl as if she were her very own child. Morgan didn't see the harm in it, especially since True had never really had a mother figure in her life. And besides that, having a kid hanging around would be good practice for Bess, at least until their own baby arrived. Bess had even enlisted her help in scrounging up pieces of silverware, scrap metal and anything else shiny that could be transformed into oversized jewelry to swap with the Grendlers. They'd spend hours talking and laughing and the topics could range from discussing their possible future plans on G889, to sharing secrets with each other, to their worries over John's recent decline in health.  
  
When it came to True's father, it was clear that Bess had also taken it upon herself to make sure that he didn't push himself too hard. It hadn't been too long after they'd started working together on their Grendler project that Bess had noticed that Danziger wasn't feeling well. She'd had several one-sided talks with the stubborn man before she'd finally gotten him to admit to the symptoms he'd been suffering from and attempting to hide for weeks. Bess had insisted on accompanying him to the med-tent when he'd approached Julia to identify the source of his illness.  
  
They were shocked by the diagnosis. According to the physician, Danziger's heart had been worn down, most likely by a combination of factors including the damage inflicted by the ZED bullet, the malfunction of his bio-stat implant and his occupation by both the ancient Terrian spirit and the spring pollen. When Bess pressed as to why he was sick now after several months of good health, Julia suggested that Danziger might have been exposed to a toxic substance during one of his many recent solo- scouts searching for Grendler caves. In any event, his experiences had culminated in some minor kidney distress along with the more serious development of an arrhythmia in his heart. Therefore, until the colony ship arrived and he could be fitted with a pacemaker, Danziger was restricted to light duty which included no manual labor and riding in the vehicles instead of walking.  
  
Coincidentally, about a month or so after Bess had learned that she was with child, Julia had detected a mild increase in Bess' blood pressure (no doubt a side effect of her pregnancy, the doctor assured) and had been given similar orders barring her from all strenuous activity. Often she and John would stay back at camp with the children while the rest of the crew scouted for food or to look for the best traveling route.  
  
Bess understood how much it hurt Danziger to be left behind. She knew the pressure that he'd always put on himself when it came to his responsibilities to the group. Though the Edenites still looked to him as a leader, John felt as if he'd failed them by becoming too weak to perform the majority of his duties. Bess witnessed his private struggles with fatigue and vertigo along with his hatred of the fact that he was dependent upon the hypos that Julia had synthesized to keep him from deteriorating further. She also watched Danziger try to dam his feelings for Devon as he came to terms with the knowledge that the two would never have a future together.  
  
Bess resolved that she would try to take John's mind off of the unhappier parts of his life by keeping him as busy as his health would allow. They pored themselves into their campaign to barter with the Grendlers and successfully traded with them for a number of needed supplies including clothing and food (although, to their mild dismay, the majority of their bounty ended up being crates of dreaded Spirolina packets). Bess and Danziger joined forces on other projects, too, and usually made sure to include True and Uly in their activities. Mazatl was also a frequent recruit for their various enterprises after Bess had been alerted as to how depressed the crewman had recently become.  
  
Even when they weren't working, Bess and John started spending more and more time with one another. She shared with him her viewpoints along with many of her stories about growing up on Earth. Slowly but surely, she began to draw Danziger out of his shell and he reluctantly started relaying the details of his own background. As time passed and their friendship grew, the pair was surprised to realize how much they had in common with each other.  
  
  
  
As for the Terrians, they began to take a more active role in their relationship with the Eden Project. Uly and Alonzo were no longer the only crew members summoned to the Dreamplane. Several (but not all) of the other Edenites were also beckoned to the alternate dimension at one time or another during their voyage. Although it took some practice learning to understand the creatures, it was clear that they wanted to help. Once when the group was running low on food and there were no Grendlers to trade with, the Terrians contacted them and provided the location of edible roots that were buried nearby. When the weather grew colder and Eden Advance worried that they would be forced to ride out the winter bunkered in one spot, the beings presented Alonzo with an alternative. The pilot's mind was implanted with a detailed course of travel including a route where the snow was shallow enough for people and the vehicles to navigate. The Terrians also communicated the positions of sunstone filled caves along their path for the crew to rest in and remain protected from the elements at night.  
  
It was during the final leg of their journey that Denner was transported to the Dreamscape and supplied with the location of Cargo Pod #7 which was positioned only a few miles from where they were camped. When the Edenites arrived at the site, they were astounded to find that, aside from a damaged beacon, the pod had somehow managed to remain completely intact with its contents left untouched by the planet's inhabitants. Now, not only did they have cartload after cartload of prefabricated housing units, the group had three brand new Transrovers and four Dunerails to haul their treasures the rest of the short distance to New Pacifica.  
  
  
  
In other words, it looked as though the pieces were finally falling into place for the close-knit family known as Eden Advance.  
  
THE END 


End file.
